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The Enemy Within  by daw the minstrel 57 Review(s)
asms2Reviewed Chapter: 6 on 11/22/2016
So Camil didn’t know about the charms – at least he claimed not to. I wonder what the Easterlings were trying to do – just cause chaos? I’m actually not sure what an Easterling is since I never read the books so I just goggled them and they appear to be part of the enemy.

It was sweet to see Thranduil give credit to Eilian and Legolas for figuring out the charms! And then it made me smile to see how Legolas tried to turn that into a bid to be done with his punishment. “Really, it was a good idea to let me out of my room” Legoals said hopefully”. Haha. Can’t fault him for trying! And Thranduil as a parent is such a treat to read.

I’m sad to see this story end, as it was a lot of fun! Do you anticipate writing any more fanfiction? Thank you for posting your writing– it has been so much fun to discover and read!!


Author Reply: I love Thranduil as a parent. I suspect his relationship with Legolas is affected by the fact that he raised Legolas mostly on his own. I think he's may be a little more nurturing with Legolas.

I'll eventually write more fanfic. I like doing it when I have the time. You're very kind to take the time to tell me you enjoyed it.

daw

sofiaReviewed Chapter: 6 on 11/21/2016
I really do love watching parent Thranduil at work....

Legolas watched them go, too, frowning slightly. "Adar, how much can you feel through our bond?"

Thranduil cocked his head. "More than you hope, but less than I'd like."

^^ I loved those that. Of course Legolas would be mortified to think his dad could pick up on his feelings about girls and I love how mischievous Thranduil is in letting Legolas think he's more all-knowing then Legolas previously thought.
And Gelmir is feeling hopeful? Interesting....
can't wait till next chapter!

Author Reply: It would be horrible to believe that your parent could sense what you felt about girls! That is what's known as Too Much Information. OTOH, I can see why Thranduil is hoping it creates a little caution. It apparently never made a difference with Eilian.

I'm sorry to say it, Sofia, but this story is complete. But I'll tell what happened with Gelmir. You remember that Ithilden said some of the Southern Patrol warriors went after him without their captain's orders? Well they found him and rescued him. And now Ithilden has to decide whether to crack some heads or not. It's always good when the solution to one problem creates another. :-)

curiouswombatReviewed Chapter: 6 on 11/21/2016
What a lovely story - I have really enjoyed it.

And I am so happy to have found this last chapter here when I logged in tonight - I am away from home, in the middle of a storm, at the hospital where my Mum should have arrived by air ambulance earlier today - except that the storm was too bad, and so I am here (having left earlier) and she, who is due a heart op, isn't. This took my mind off things for a while and has calmed me down to sleep - thank you again.

Author Reply: Oh dear. I hope your mother gets there tomorrow. You live in a beautiful place, but I guess there are disadvantages. I assume she's tucked in and cared for. You take care of you too.

Glad you liked the story.

TariReviewed Chapter: 1 on 11/21/2016
I looked up Deep As A Tomb by Dorothy A. Winsor. I hope that's you because I just bought the Ebook.
.

Author Reply: That's me. My fanfic writer name is my initials.

Thank you for buying the book. I'm with a small press and they can't afford to do a lot of promotion, so I'm afraid no one will hear about it.

NoorReviewed Chapter: 6 on 11/21/2016
Thank you Daw. I have just finished rereading all your stories and I must congratulate you once again on your world of OCs intertwined with Tolkien's. You have done a wonderful job. You have given Legolas such a rich tapestry of life pre LOTR. The OCs are divine. Your writing is very expressive and moving - I cried once again after rereading "Creature of Fire" and " Spring of Joy" . I love the way you flit between adolescent Legolas as in "The Enemy Within" to adult Legolas in the latter stories. The phrases and expressions remain with one long after reading the stories. I still remember you writing about Thranduil in "Tangled Web" towards the end when he is watching his 3 adult sons laughing together and he is thinking about all their attributes prior to the battle scene - very eloquent
However your stories do make me yearn for yet more eg Gelmir missing, so how was he found? Also what adventures did Legolas and Sinnarn have? What happened to Legolas and your OCs after "A Creature Of Fire" but before "Tangled Web" I wish you every success with your original fiction but I hope you continue to add to this wonderful collection of yours. I have read so many stories by other authors - and so many of them do a great job - Nimandra and Bodkin spring to mind -( love their work too) as do a few others but I must put you top of the league. As someone else said in one of the other reviews, I tend to think of your OCs and world as being the real Legolas world pre LOTR. The detail of your work - descriptions, feelings etc are second to none so thank you.... and I hope you return to this world frequently.

RadbooksReviewed Chapter: 6 on 11/20/2016
Great story, DAW! I loved reading about some of my favorite elves and I really admire how you are able to squeeze stories into your world. Not always an easy thing to do, I imagine. Anyway, thanks for sharing your gift with us.

Author Reply: Thanks for the kind words, Radbooks.

PSWReviewed Chapter: 6 on 11/20/2016
'More than you hope, but less than I'd like.' Ha! Yes, that will keep him guessing for a while .... nothing like knowing that your parent *might* know, but then again might not ... :-P

So Thranduil finally got to take out his annoyance on someone. Likely it was good that it wasn't on his own family, that probably happens often enough. Good that he just decided to kick Camil out and be done with it, good that he decided he didn't care about what was going on with Hoth (though I suspect in the morning he may feel differently :-P), good that he decided to give Ithilden and Alfirin a push. Good that he is not tearing into Legolas about being where he wasn't supposed to be -- chances are that would only make things worse at this point. In fact, I think Thranduil handled this all very well -- perhaps the scope of it (*everyone* being involved, not just a few) made him decide he really just wanted it to go away rather than follow up on every little thing. I know that happens to me sometimes ...

This was fun, I've very much enjoyed it! Thanks for writing! :-)

P.S. What did happen with Gelmir?? Was he captured and escaped, was he just lost, was he injured and had to make his way back? Did he just need a vacation? Where is he? Inquiring minds would like to know .... *grins*

Author Reply: I amused myself by having Thranduil just bat the charm away. LOL. He's not ever likely to be accommodating to someone like Camil, but his annoyed mood really nixed any gratitude for a "gift." I always like it when he or Ithilden decide Men's problems were their own affair, because Wood-elves didn't care. Also I liked making Ithilden jump over the table and wade into the fray when he sees the dagger, snapping his fingers at warriors for help as he goes. I'm sure Alfirin was impressed. :-)

I don't know what happened to Gelmir. He's escaped and is hurt. Or his fellow warriors who took off without orders rescued him. Yeah. I like that. It makes problems for someone even as it saves him. That's good.

Thanks for sticking with the story, PSW. Always good to hear from you.

Lady AReviewed Chapter: 5 on 11/20/2016
Thank you again for this great story ! I love the passage in which Legolas tries to make Eilian back away. I think he is more conscient of his role and of the persons that are watching them. Just a question : did you delete your story "the spy" ? because I can't access it anymore on the site and I though it was such a sweet story in which Thrandeuil talks about an almost adult Legolas as his "last baby"
Thanks


Author Reply: Hi, Lady A!

In what I guess is a role reversal of sorts, Legolas is trying to keep Eilian out of as much trouble as he can. Good luck on that one, Legolas.

I did delete The Spy. I revised it and am submitting it to various short story magazines to see if I can entice anyone else into reading it. We'll see how that goes. Maybe it will reappear sometime if I give up.

daw

NanethReviewed Chapter: 5 on 11/20/2016
Hooray, an update! Interesting developments. The thought of a mouth on the jewelry makes me feel slightly nauseous. I hope that Adar can remain calm until things are explained.

Author Reply: Thranduil is one of those scary people who can talk calmly while he's ready to slit someone's throat. So we'll see! Just one more chapter, sadly enough. I think I'll finish it today.

Good to see you, Naneth.

obsidianjReviewed Chapter: 5 on 11/19/2016
Oh, oh... These charms are speaking? That doesn't sound good. Luckily, Eilian loves his baby brother very much, or the situation could have gotten really bad. I hope it is not too late to do something about them.

Author Reply: Luckily, the Elvenking is not wearing a charm and isn't like to. The next (and sadly last) chapter is from Thranduil's POV.

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