|About Us News Resources Login Become a member Help Search|
|More Dangerous and Less Wise by daw the minstrel||86 Review(s)|
|The Karenator||Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 11/25/2008|
|"The river may have been icy, but really, Beliond is fortunate you led him to it.|
Oh yeah. And Beliond's memory is slipping, according to Maltanaur. I laughed out loud when I read that. I like how you went straight to that point and that one sentence clued us in to the important parts of Maltanaur's side of the story.
On the other hand, Maltanaur was showing him a Beliond whom Legolas had rarely suspected of existing. Legolas shouldn't feel bad, Beliond probably doesn't know either. :>) Great line. Legolas is so serious and I'm trying to figure out if Maltanaur is deliberately messing with the story and Legolas with a sly smile or if he's telling the story from his perspective. Either way, it's still a funny switch-up of POV in the story.
And boy, Thranduil sure is going to get an interesting surprise when Beliond and Maltanaur show up with Stubby. The buds have been busy while Thranduil was trying to stay out of trouble. :>)
Another great line: Not that his brother had let Legolas take part, but word got around. As I recall, Legolas managed to get involved in a couple of Eilian's capers--even without being invited.
Author Reply: I'm trying to figure out if Maltanaur is deliberately messing with the story and Legolas with a sly smile or if he's telling the story from his perspective
Oh, good question! I intended it to be just his POV. After all, we're all the heroes of our own stories. But Maltanaur is watching Legolas and closely enough to know when he starts to fret about Eilian and Beliond, so I wouldn't put it past him to juice the story up some. He's used to coaxing Eilian along. He'd have no problem doing the same for Legolas.
Glad you liked it, Karen.
|The Karenator||Reviewed Chapter: 2 on 11/25/2008|
|"...and I assume he told you the same thing about Maltanaur, only just now, I am Maltanaur."|
"Like spit you are."
"He has admirable patience. Patience is not my best quality. "
My favorite lines. What a great...uh, discussion. Beliond doesn't seem too ruffled by this new charge's belligerence, but New Charge seems a little annoyed. Eilian will have a new appreciation for Legolas's woes and a new appreciation for Maltanaur when he finally returns Beliond.
I felt bad for the trio of troublemakers when they met the mad hornets. I guess this is the incident where the phrase, "Mad as a wet hornet' was born, huh? Only these mad hornets climbed out of the river and didn't go right back to their nest as they should have.
Let me add this line. I knew when I read it, there was another side to this story. I love it. "I think the pain of the stings confused Maltanaur," Beliond said. "That was why he needed me to lead him to the river."
Really enjoyed this chapter. Looking forward to the next.
Author Reply: When I put Beliond and Eilian together, I expected more fireworks, but they surprised me by discovering how much alike they were rather than how much they annoyed one another. Of course, they didn't have to stand one another for very long. I suspect things would have gone down hill.
Thanks for the review, Karen.
|perelleth||Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 11/25/2008|
|Well, this was priceless from beginning to end. I really loved the two versions of the same tale, and how you managed the voices of these young ones. They really sound like younger versions of the elves we know. And boy, Hang on, THranduil! That was my favourite part. I could picture THranduil's face as the walked away! And then Oropher! more placid than Amdir's guard, if that was possible! NO wonder they all followed him blindly!|
A dragon egg! For a brief while I feared the wargs were feeding on the poor dwarves! And I really liked how you let us see Beliond's undisguised excitemtn at the thought of a dragon!
Delightful, daw. And I wonder what will happen when the two brothers compare notes and versions... And I did not remember that Beliond and Ithilden had served together! That must have been something worth seeing!
Author Reply: What story was it where Beliond was Ithilden's captain? Hm. I must know that! I think it was in a flashback in "Fire and Shadow," the previous story about this patrol's encounter with a dragon, the one where Legolas has amnesia. Of course, Ithilden didn't fall out of a tree in that story because I just made that incident up for this last chapter.
I'm so glad you think the characters are true to themselves, though much younger. It's actually tricky to do, I find. Except for Beliond. He's always himself :-)
Thanks for the review, Perelleth. And glad you're home in one piece.
|elliska||Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 11/24/2008|
|Tense fight! And I can't believe they had a dragon's egg! That does not bode well for the wood.|
And I cannot believe they had the nerve to grab a second dwarf and throw him over the ledge into the poison ivy while they left Thranduil hanging there in it. You are horrible! ;-)
Beyond the captain, Oropher waited, looking faintly amused. Spit tea on the keyboard at that. I was wondering how they were really going to get away with this because the dwarves are going to remember what happened and tell--they're going to get away with it because Oropher just doesn't care. Hilarious!
Eilian waited to feel annoyed as he always did at being reminded of how his father worried, but instead he felt only sadness for the loss of that other time, when his father and his friends were young and carefree. This was sobering. How sad.
"When we have time, I have a story to tell you." That comparison of versions should be very amusing!
Great story. I love your young Thranduil. You should do more of him!
Author Reply: And I cannot believe they had the nerve to grab a second dwarf and throw him over the ledge into the poison ivy while they left Thranduil hanging there in it
Priorities! They had theirs and, as Beliond said, Thranduil wasn't going anywhere.
Yeah, Oropher doesn't care. He'd probably like this story if he ever got wind of it, but I suspect none of the trio is going to tell him.
For a while, I worried that the comic and somber tones in this story clashed too much, but when I was done, I was reasonably pleased with the sort of layered effect it created. I wouldn't do anything like this in my original stuff right now but this was interesting to play with.
|elliska||Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 11/24/2008|
|"The river may have been icy, but really, Beliond is fortunate you led him to it. Hilarious! So who is telling the truth here? Sorry, but I tend to believe Maltanaur.|
What a fascinating glimpse of his father as a young, single warrior, intrigued and put a little off-balance by interest from a maiden who was not Legolas's mother. I was thinking the same thing, actually, as I was reading the last chapter. :-)
Oh my gosh! Their plan was so evil! I thought it was bad enough when they cut the ropes with the dwarf's axe. Then when they grabbed him too! I couldn't imagine what they were going to do with him. That was even more evil. And the duel POVs in telling the story are really hilarious!
Author Reply: Their plan was so evil!
LOLOL. Hey, more dangerous and less wise, Elliska!
It's very hard to imagine Thranduil young like this, I find. Beliond and Maltanaur are easier.
|elliska||Reviewed Chapter: 2 on 11/24/2008|
|Hehehe! Beliond and Eilian don't disappoint. That was hilarious!|
"What's more, Lord Oropher didn't mean it." Something about this just killed me. I can so see that happening.
Oh, and what the dwarves did! That is going to require revenge! Beliond's POV is really a hoot in telling this story.
Author Reply: I love Oropher. He seems so charismatic to me. He walks into the forest full of Wood-elves and they make him king. How likely is that?
Beliond's POV is always fun to write because he's about a million times less inhibited than I am. I found that stuff about how cold the Silverlode is in FOTR. When the Fellowship enters Lothlorien, one of the guards tells them not to step in the water because it's so cold. Beliond is worried about its effects on his equipment. :-)
|elliska||Reviewed Chapter: 1 on 11/24/2008|
|This is great humor writing. I was rolling laughing all the way through this. Hard to pick out favorites, because I loved so many of these lines. But these two stand out the most for me:|
My favorite line of all had to be: the re-embodiment of a bossy, little Noldor lady whose family had finally had enough and shuffled her off to see Namo during the kin slaying. I absolutely howled!
"I am a Wood-Elf," Eilian said, which would have been more reassuring if he had not just fallen out of a tree. Howled again. Hilarious!
Elian and Beliond--that is going to be rich!
And I am looking forward to hearing this story about Thranduil. Not telling each other's children indeed!
Author Reply: I'm glad I made you laugh! You're working too hard.
This story turned out to be about Wood-elves and what they're like, for good and for ill. Poor Beliond! He really is a far more adventuresome person than Legolas knows. But he's about to find out. :-)
|perelleth||Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 11/24/2008|
|A present to Thranduil! This chapter is a hoot, daw, I bet you had so much fun writing these two wild ones charging across the dwarves' camp! |
MAltanaur sounds really young, half-thoughtful half- young, while it is easy to see how Beliond would have been such a walking earthquake in his youth. Despite his bitterness he still has that dry humour and it sounds fresh and truthful to the charaacter we know here, congratulations! And what can we say of this poor Thrnaduil, torn between behaving as heir or following his true nature... and his friends truly undesrtanding his plight... to their own advantage. I laughed out loud when Maltanaur found out that Beliond had no plan beyond catching the Dwarf!!! A delightful read, and now I'm jumping to see what happened to Stubby and Thrnaduil! A nice cliffhanger there, and no pun intended! It is so good to have you back!
Author Reply: I did have fun writing that raid on the Dwarves' camp. Beliond and Maltanaur were so sure they could get away with anything, and then they did!
I love the idea of Beliond as a "walking earthquake"! What a great expression. He just can't believe the universe would deny him the chance to get him own back. I think he and Maltanaur both seem younger than Thranduil, who's been sobered by what life has thrown at him already as well as by his role as heir. These two were probably good for him.
Thank you, Perelleth.
|sofia||Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 11/24/2008|
|It's one thing to have Legolas and Eilian with the others keeper, but its another thing to find yourself in that position and in a skirmish of sorts. It just makes everything more interesting, especially seeing how they work together (which really isn't that different). |
I would love it if you wrote more of our favorite elves in similar situations- just a thought.
And I loved the end- I can picture it clearly in my mind. Thank you for another wonderful story Daw!
Author Reply: Thanks, Sofia. I wonder if Eilian and Beliond would have had more trouble if the situation had gone on longer or the battle had been bigger. Just lack of familiarity with one another's fighting styles might have caused problems. Who knows?
|ziggy||Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 11/24/2008|
|noooooooo! Not the end! I was just getting into Beliond guarding Eilian, being so close he could feel his body heat- or more likely breathing down his neck! and Eilian being like Oropher and stuff, and Legolas just getting used to having a lovely easy-going Maltanaur rather than the usual real dragon that is Beliond- didn't Thranduil (or you!) pick his nanas well!! I loved seeing this other side of Beliond.|
Oh, and the theme or motif I suppose, of telling stories. I love the idea that Beliond and Maltanaur are both dying to tell the story but they mustn't let on to the other... can't wait to hear Thranduil's version (go on, you know you want to!). And Ithilden falling off a branch- wonderful!!!
The underlying sadness of this is first, that dragons are dangerous but wonderful but Eilian destroys a dragon's egg - couldnt help feeling a bit sad, then the loss of kindlier times in which Thranduil, Maltanur and Beliond grew up, and then Beliond's comment about them following Oropher.
Beliond is right though, Eilian is woodelf through and through and it is nice that he doesn't get annoyed when Beliond tells him that is why his father worries. It's strange that you can accept things that others tell you but not what your parents tell you. And Eilian's protectiveness of Legolas is always good. You always get so much in, layer upon layer and just keep on giving it more depth and detail.
Thank you for this delight.
Author Reply: LOL. I have to get back to the novel I'm currently working on. It's in sad shape and needs revision badly.
You know what I've thought about the way Thranduil matched his sons to their keepers? He knew both Maltanaur and Beliond would guard their charges well, and he knew Maltanaur was willing to be wily in tricking Eilian into doing what he ought to do. So that was a good match. But with Beliond and Legolas, that match was as much for Beliond's sake as for Legolas's. Beliond needed to care for a young person again. He needed to heal from seeing his son die in Oropher's wild charge.
Dragons are gorgeous creatures but Tolkien is pretty sure they're not good to have around. Look at Smaug. Have you ever read any books by Robin Hobb? The last book of her assassin trilogy has wonderful scenes with dragons.
It's strange that you can accept things that others tell you but not what your parents tell you.
That's exactly right!
Thanks for your kind comments, Ziggy.