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| The River by Indigo Bunting | 14 Review(s) |
|---|---|
| Larner | Reviewed Chapter: 8 on 11/7/2005 |
| I'd suspected Garan was Saruman's creature, and I'm glad to see I was right. Nasty git, he is; and rightfully suspicious, of course. However, he has no idea just how tenacious the other seven he's not seen yet can be; and I certainly hope Aragorn sees the signs of the climb and haul up that cliff--I'm certain the men would have left such signs fairly clearly. And I hope they've seen the fire and are thinking how to get Sam and Legolas away from this nasty group. And Frodo, I'm certain, is fit to be tied! Author Reply: Yep – Garan is Saruman’s lackey. You’re also right about the other seven and how they would react if they were aware of what had befallen Sam and Legolas. Frodo would most certainly be enraged, and Aragorn no less so. I’m still not sure whether it will be chapter 10 or 11 before we get back to the Fellowship; it depends on whether I want one more chapter from Sam before that point. I expect that I will, even though it wasn’t in my original outline. | |
| Jay of Lasgalen | Reviewed Chapter: 8 on 11/7/2005 |
| This is the story I'm enjoying most of all at the moment. Sam and Legolas are right to fear and suspect Garan - he seems truly evil. The knowledge that Saruman is behind the men is very bad news - I shudder to think what he has in mind for the pair, especially Legolas. It's the part about the 'raw material for orcs' that sounds so horrible :( Garan suddenly striking Sam was very well done - poor Sam never knew what hit him, and neither did we. I liked Legolas' fury here too - I think you write him and Sam very well; both individually and together. Author Reply: Yeah. Wait until Legolas finds out where Garan is going and why he is wanted. Sam will be appropriately horrified once the picture comes together for him; right now he’s really got no reason to suspect that Elves and orcs have anything to do with each other. Garan’s words would have been clear as a bell for Legolas. I took no pleasure in having Garan strike Sam. I’m with Legolas when he says, in the upcoming chapter, that what Garan has done is like striking a child. Sam is not a child at all, but what chance did he have against someone so much bigger than him, and his own hands bound together? And Garan did more than harm Sam physically; he stole his dignity, too. I think it would be extremely humiliating to be treated in such a way and be denied the chance to defend oneself. As I mentioned in another response, it will get a little worse before it gets better, mostly because help has not yet come, and Garan will not let up now that he has begun. He would not be very convincing or effective if all he did was blow smoke; he’s got to put some of his menace into action. Not only would he not be convincing as a character, but empty threats would never suffice to hold Legolas in check. Ironically, the flip side of this (where Garan is concerned) is that too much harm done to Sam will eventually spur Legolas into motion, regardless of what the consequences are for him. There are some things that he would not be able to sit by and watch. | |
| French Pony | Reviewed Chapter: 8 on 11/7/2005 |
| This is a good chapter for forensics. I especially enjoy watching all the characters look at the same set of information -- an Elf and a Hobbit, both injured, traveling apparently alone in a place where no one ought to be in the first place -- and the different interpretations that they all spin from that data set. I love Sam's lies with just enough truth in them that he can believe them easily. When Sam and Legolas woke up to find the guard missing, I thought it might be a possible opportunity for them to untie each other and try to sneak off, but I suppose that in their injured and exhausted state, that wouldn't have worked very well. It might have been worth a try, or it might not -- it's a tossup, really. Legolas might have made it on his own, but of course he'd stay with Sam, and if Sam wasn't up to a quick, quiet escape, probably the better course of action would be to stay where they were. But a sleeping guard is an opportunity that doesn't come along often. Author Reply: Perhaps I should call you “Eagle Eye” instead of “French Pony”. :-) You’re right – it would have been worth a go (trying to untie their bonds, that is). There were four things in this chapter that I wanted to fix before posting. For the life of me I could never remember the fourth thing and probably never would have had you not spotted it. I’m not planning to change the posted chapter, though; I’ll just leave it as it is. At least Legolas and Sam only had a few scant minutes before the guard stirred. If they had had hours and hadn’t fussed over their bonds… well, that would have been one heck of a gaffe. It’s kind of funny, really; there’s plenty of mention made of Sam’s and Legolas’ bonds in the next chapter and their attempts to undo them, including the following line in some way, shape or form: “Garan untied me quickly enough this morning. I think there’s some trick to the knot. If we can find out what it is….” That’s Sam speaking. It’s not actually worked into the chapter yet; it’s one of a few lonely lines at the end, waiting to be incorporated in the right way. I do that with points that I want to make sure get made, among other things. Anyway, unless I make a big change to the chapter, it will probably show up in the next posting. | |
| TithenFeredir | Reviewed Chapter: 8 on 11/7/2005 |
| Wow. This was a very tense chapter. Your Garan makes an excellent villian. He's quite evil, and ambitious in his way, but he's no fool and that makes him all the more threatening. The blow he dealt Sam was no love tap and it took me completely by surprise. On top of everything else, Garan is unpredictable. You really are making me fear for our elf and hobbit. I suspect it will get worse before it gets better. Great story! ~TF Author Reply: Thanks, Tithen. :-) I think that Garan’s unpredictability is one of the things that makes him so dangerous. He doesn’t seem like he’s about to turn violent, and then he goes and pulls the rug out from beneath Sam. He knows when he’s had enough of Sam’s story, but Sam doesn’t, and Garan will want to keep both Sam and Legolas off-balance. Yes, it will get a little worse before it gets better, but not too much. As I’ve said so many times before, I’m no tormentor – but Garan can’t be all talk and no substance. | |