Here's my brother's (the preacher) new episode--longer than the others, and more serious, and very much in keeping with the KJV tone and that of LOTR.  Please read (and let us know what you think):

The Fourth Book of Frodo

A Reading from the Fourth Book of Frodo, Chapter 1, Verses 42-71

42 Then came Samwise and Frodo unto the foot of Emyn Muil while yet the moon shone in the sky. And as they were faint and weary they did lay them down to rest. 43 But ere their eyes had closed to sleep, 44 behold, Frodo did espy some thing that did creep down the cliff under which they had encamped.

45 Then said he unto Samwise, Lift up thine eyes, oh friend of my youth, and say unto me what thou seest as it creepeth above thy head. 46 And Sam did lift up his eyes, and behold he saw one Smeagol, even he whom men call Gollum.

47 And he answered Frodo saying, Oh my master it is Gollum, he from whom we have fled, lo these many days. Like a spider is he in his descent as he crawleth his way down. 48 I fear lest he should search and find our place of refuge.

49 Then spoke Frodo and said, 50 Be not afraid, Samwise, for behold about thee thou hast the cloke given unto thee by those of elven-kind. 51 Doth it not serve to confound the sight of even those who are near unto thee? 52 Will it not also do as much and even more to this one who is thine enemy?

53 And while they were yet speaking, Gollum did drop himself from the cliff above them, and did fall like as unto a spider that hath been severed from her web. 54 Then did Samwise quickly leap upon Gollum meaning thereby to subdue him. 55 But Gollum did twist himself about and into the neck of Samwise did he sink his teeth.

56 Then rose up Frodo and, drawing his sword, did shew it unto Gollum saying, 57 Take heed, O Gollum thou knowest this blade, even Sting. Put away thine hand from this thy captive and live.

58 Then Gollum released Samwise and spoke unto Frodo in a voice as that of a serpent 59 Saying, Hurt us not, O gentle hobbitses. No harm do we mean unto them. 60 Our precious present art thou. 61 (Even so spoke he, as though to the ring of doom which he did yet covet) 62 Lonely and an hungered are we and seek not to harm them.

63 Thus it was that after he had been released Samwise did entreat Frodo to slay Gollum 64 saying, Hath this creature not been shewed unworthy of thy trust? And will he not plot in his heart vile things against us?

65 But Frodo pondered long in his heart and did bring mind to mind the words of Gandalf concerning Gollum.

66 Many there are that deserve death and yet they live
67 Many there are that deserve life and yet they perish
68 Hast thou been given authority to execute judgment on the one
69 Hast thou been granted power to extend life to the other
70 Even the wisest know not all that shall come to pass

71 Then was the heart of Frodo moved with compassion and he commanded Samwise 72 saying, Stay now thine hand, Samwise, for mine heart is moved within me. 73 Though his thoughts be ever evil against us, yet shall he live.