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Answering Machines of Middle-earth  by Lindelea

At the Tower of Orthanc, Part 2

You have reached the palantir of Saruman the Wise. Please listen
carefully--menu options have changed.

To speak to Gandalf the White, press 1.

To speak to the fool of a Took, press 2.

To leave a message for the Heir of Isildur, press 3.

To report a sighting of the Ring-bearer, press 4.

If there is battle in progress, please hang up and call 911.

To repeat these options, press 8.

To end this call. press 9.

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