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Answering Machines of Middle-earth  by Lindelea

At the Tower of Orthanc, Part 1

You have reached the palantir of Saruman the Wise. If you have reached this message, I am probably out gloating over my war machine, or having trees cut down. Leave a message at the groan and I will get back to you when my nails are dry. Or stay on the line and I'll send some Uruk-Hai out to get you...

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