News Resources
Login
Become a member
Help
Search
|
|
| About Us News Resources
Login
Become a member
Help
Search
|
|
|
| In the Hands of the Enemy by meckinock | 153 Review(s) |
|---|---|
| The Karenator | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 11/1/2003 |
| Wow! What a great chapter. I could see the scene unfolding in a seedy downtown hotel room where neon lights split a night so dark that even the stars were afraid to show their innocent faces. The mood is set where the gumshoe is interrogating the witless kitchen boy after the kid was fingered by the mysterious but beautiful cocktail waitress who served the P.Eye's missing friend the evening before. Despite this man's underlying current of extreme danger, his living on the edge demeanor and his scruffy hardened appearance, she finds herself inexplicably drawn to him; he's sexy as hell! Halbarad, as Johnny Halbarad, PI, is skating on the edge, grasping for control of his overwhelming urge to beat information out of his reluctant informant and his practical need to wheedle it from the kid by indentifying with him, soothing him and offering the diminutive floor-swabber his strong shoulder to unburden himself on. He is the consumate investigator, having served his time as an enforcer of an imperfect law that fails as often as it succeeds. Then we have Olorin Gandalf, a forsenics/science expert and kind hearted gentleman who is well known in his field for his uncanny abilities. Some have even called him a wizard. However, for as gentle as Gandalf seems, he is equally as deadly and the few who have firsthand knowledge of this deception rarely live to tell it. Barley Butterbur is extraordinary in his role as the flustered inn-keeper. I see movie offers...maybe even a TV series. Girl, you nailed this scene! :>) Karen Author Reply: I saved this one for last because I had to climb back onto my log! You have missed your calling! I want to see you write Elves like this! | |
| daw the minstrel | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 11/1/2003 |
| I LOVE Halbarad. He is so human and he interacts so convincingly with both Gandalf and Tillfield. He is clever and tricky and honest. He cares about dead teenagers and does what his wife tells him. What more could one ask for? This is just another stunning chapter. I continue to be so impressed by your ability to bring these people and places alive. Author Reply: I know; what a doll. Too bad he's taken... | |
| grumpy | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 11/1/2003 |
| hi there,this chapter was great, so glad you gave us the backstory of what had happened between Halbarad and Aragorn, and what the rangers life is like. Can not be very easy between the orcs, wolves and winter (snow) The rangers life is very hard, you got to wonder why they do it! Loved the parts with Gandalf and Halbarad, and when Gandalf asked for a clean handkerchief, I couldn't help but laugh. looking forward to much more Author Reply: Thanks - this chapter gave me fits and I'm glad you think it worked out OK in the end! Also glad you found the attempts at humor amusing - I've sat here thinking "Well, I think it's funny, but on the other hand I thought THAT was a good color for a sofa, so there you go... | |
| Nilmandra | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 11/1/2003 |
| Just when I think this story cannot get any better, it does! I love your look into the life of the Dunedain - the hardness of it, the suffering and all that they did to keep the lands safe. Halbarad is fantastic - I love his retelling of the orc hunt and how Strider normally behaves around his men and his brothers. I also like how you have made the women strong -they fought off the orcs, they hold these families together and they bury their sons and husbands - and sometimes apparently their mothers and daughters too - when fortune does not go their way. Gandalf is very good interrogating the girl, but Halabarad truly rose to the occasion for the hobbit lad. He recognized the 'enemey' as not inherently evil, but as someone who chose to do the wrong thing for reasons we can all empathize with. You give believable motivations to the characters here. And I cannot wait for Halbarad to meet Teburic. Author Reply: Thanks, once again you are beyond gracious! Unfortunately Professor Tolkien didn't give the women a lot to do, and inserting female characters is so danged tricky that I just plain won't tackle it - glad you found some merit in my very meager attempt to recognize the contributions of half the population! | |
| fliewatuet | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 11/1/2003 |
| Aah, here comes the backstory! No wonder Aragorn was not in his best mood. And Halbarad obviously had to listen to a few choice words of his lady *grin*. I loved this chapter. I especially love your characterization of Gandalf. The mental image you created of a bleary-eyed wizzard clad in his nightshirt, woken in the middle of the night by some ill-tempered Ranger was priceless! And then his attempt at eaves-dropping at Halbarad's door, earning him not much insight but a crick in his neck. All in all, a nice mixture of humour and the grim reality of the day to day life of the Rangers. And, by the way, I like your Halbarad as well. Though he is angry at the Hobbit and the whole situation, weary, worried and probably had consumed no small amount of ale, he still has enough discipline to adapt his interrogation technique to the situation at hand and not use the same methods on the poor Hobbit he would employ were he to question some Orcs. Author Reply: Yes, I can almost hear Halbarad's wife now... Aah, yes, the dreaded backstory. Kind of like taking medicine. Glad you like the mixture of humor and drama/angst-I was not sure if readers would find it effective or off-putting - the reassurance is appreciated! Halbarad probably hasn't had any ale in a long time so it's kind of impressive that he can even stay awake while he's talking himself to death... | |
| grumpy | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 10/30/2003 |
| wow this story just keeps getting better and better, last chapter was great. Amazing the amount of weapons on Aragorn, and a few the boy didn't get. Reading so far about the boy i wouldn't trust him, but then Aragorn has not read this. I love some of the names the Strider has picked up, the best being "Obstinate, Stiff-necked, self-absorbed. . ." And if wasn't bad enough that it was raining now it is snowing. Hate the white stuff myself. Really looking forward to more Author Reply: Thanks, now you've given me a challenge - I can't let you down! Aragorn does have a lot of weapons, but since he has no stereo equipment he has to make up for it somehow. I'm glad you enjoyed the, uh, names he recalled having heard a time or two - I'm sure they were meant very affectionately, though... Never fear - tomorrow will be bright and sunny! | |
| fliewatuet | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 10/30/2003 |
| That battlefield must have been a gruesome sight indeed. Rolly seems like a tough fellow to me, in spite of his tender age. His 'cleaning up' was quite efficient, and maybe even mercyful given Kergelen's pityful state. Aragorn, as always, was marvellous! Even tired, wet, wounded and barely conscious he is a most formidable warrior. Pretending to be unconscious so as to trick Rolly was no small feat. Neither was their march to find at least some semblance of shelter. But you did not spare them aught! After fighting a battle (BTW will you give us some more details about that battle Aragorn and Halbarad fought prior to the events of your story?), travelling injured in the constant rain, being ambushed and knocked out, you have to add snow to Aragorn's misery? (Okay, I should not complain ...) But he at least was granted a warming fire. As far as Rolly is concerned, I still don't know where to place him. He did neither try to tie Aragorn's hands nor try to kill him, but I am still not sure that he is to be completely trusted. He did knock out Aragorn, after all. Finally, I loved that Gandalf-Butterbur scene! Butterbur groping for an answer to Gandalf's question, his digression and Gandalf trying to turn his focus back on topic! Wonderful! Author Reply: Thanks, oh you master of driving Aragorn past the brink of exhaustion (At least I haven't given him broken ribs yet). I'm actually not sure at what point he regained consciousness - I think the sternal rub might have had something to do with it. References to the battle will continue to occur, since something happened there which really shook Aragorn. Aragorn isn't sure Rolly should be trusted, either... Glad you enjoyed Butterbur's cameo. There will be more attempts at comic relief to come! | |
| daw the minstrel | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 10/30/2003 |
| This is just so well written that I can't get over it. There's enough description of setting to give a real physical sense of the place, but not so much that it gets tedious. There are real characters and a well controlled switching between their perspectives. There is a plot. I want to know what happens! And there is the honesty it takes to describe the deaths of the thieves. I can't wait for more. Author Reply: Thanks for the extremely gracious comments, I'm thrilled you think I succeeded in striking a balance - this was a real challenge for me, especially since I wrote parts of the story at different times. I had to take a six-month break for a job transfer when I was about halfway done and I have since gone back and done a lot of editing, because some parts I wrote earlier went ON AND ON AND ON about the scenery (including Chapter 3, which was the first chaper I wrote)... Peter Jackson's comments about why he cut the scenes he eventually re-inserted into the FOTR extended edition were also instructive - the message I got was - KEEP THE STORY MOVING. Perspective was also tricky - despite the fact that every writer's bible dictates against it, I actually enjoy shifting perspective, but making sure the transitions were clear and not too distracting continues to give me migraines - thanks for the reassurance. | |
| Nilmandra | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 10/30/2003 |
| Friend or foe is the question, isn't it? This 'boy' just cruelly killed in cold blood; has lied and seems to continue to do so, and yet has also been bested by the ranger rather unexpectedly....but when he could finish Strider off, he does not do so. Which rather leads me to believe there is danger waiting ahead that he is leading Strider into.... Nice suspense, nice writing... Author Reply: Thanks - Aragorn's weakness is that even if he knows the boy has been corrupted by bad company, he will still see something in him worth saving - is he right? | |
| The Karenator | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 10/30/2003 |
| I'm beginning to think this boy is the one that needs watching. We already know he was with the outlaws, but then he lied to Aragorn about Aragorn's head injury. I want to jump to conclusions and decide who he is, but in order not to make a complete fool of myself, I'll wait...and try to be patient. I don't think Aragorn trust him at all. I should hope not anyway. The kid is certainly a mysterious sort....he puts up a good front though. I doubt he would want to meet Gandalf, but I am hoping that the wizard goes after Aragron. Your characterizations remain strong and the plot thickens. I loved the descriptions of Butterbur. This is such a great line..."In all the long years he’d known Barley, he’d never been able to decide if his memory lapses were a genuine character trait or merely the useful affectation of a career bartender." I'm glad you're updating at a good rate. I just hate being left in the dark! :>) I'm looking forward to the next chapter. Good show, meckinock. :>) Karen Author Reply: You are such a fanatastic reviewer - I am unworthy! Gandalf will indeed be going after Aragorn - with a little help. Glad you liked the portrayal of Butterbur - he is such a teddy bear - I never envisioned writing him but he is just so easy to write... The story is supposedly finished at 15 chapters (at least I thought so before I started posting it); I intend to keep posting on Tues-Thurs-Sat-Sun, unless I decide to change something too drastically (as it is, I am unexpectedly finding myself spending six hours a day changing happys to glads). | |