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Free Fall  by Lindorien 52 Review(s)
Raksha The DemonReviewed Chapter: 9 on 6/18/2004
One of the best chapters yet. Aragorn finally cracking the nut that is Boromir (meaning that in a hard-shelled way, not crazy) but too late. Aragorn's conversation with Boromir, Boromir's vision from Galadriel (would things have turned out differently if she had just come out and TOLD him - I know you're tempted, don't try to take the Ring or you'll either die or destroy the world), juxtaposed with Faramir's perils in Ithilien. Excellent work! I like the conversation between Aragorn and Boromir; and Boromir's point that he and Faramir and all of Gondor have been holding, fighting the darkness for years, and they are slipping; while Aragorn is new to prolonged, desperate battles.

I hope you'll elaborate on Faramir's eventual meeting with Aragorn.

Loved the scene with Faramir and his Merry Men-er-Rangers doing Rangerly things.

Author Reply:
Next chapter for that meeting - but they meet under surreal circumstances. Then Aragorn is gone and Faramir doesn't see him again until he hands over the reins, as well as the reign of the kingdom.

You know - I have to wonder what Galadriel's motives were in that whole scene. It is something I ponder. I tried to make Boromir's warning look like the reason Faramir sent them all crashing to the ground. Do I need to add a few words to elaborate that? I think Boromir got a bum rap - his priorities were a little different from the rest of the fellowship. Necessary, one supposes because he was on the front lines closest to the peril and had been there for years.

MirkwoodmaidenReviewed Chapter: 2 on 6/17/2004
Lindorien!

Well built chapter! Again Boromir's direct approach yields little but his own frustration. Poor Boromir. He tries, and I love the way that you sketch his commitment to Gondor! Nicely done!

P. S. I've been away from the board because I'm now a newlywed! Yeah!! He is wonderful! Just now I'm trying to get back to some writing and I thought the best way to do that was to start reading again.

MM

Author Reply:
Married! Mazoltov! Hmmm...must consider a F/E wedding drabble for you. Hopefully to be finished before your silver anniversary! Oh! Wait a minute! I have a double drabble I just put up in my Drabble, Drabble folder. I'm off to dedicate it to you now. Just the teensiest bit risque.

And I'm glad you are liking this fic! Lindorien

Rose SaredReviewed Chapter: 7 on 6/17/2004
I really like the way we can see into Aragorn's head in this chapter, and all the conflict between Aragorn's experience of Boromir versus his understanding of Denethor. The dialogue really illuminates Boromir's discomfort along with Aragorn and Gandalf's difficult, more global choices, as well as Aragorn's growing respect for Boromir.
Bravo,much enjoyed.
Rose

Author Reply: Thanks again, Rose. I had to shift focus. Thus far, the Fellowship scenes have been from Boromir's perspective, but he is fading, so to speak and the focus has to shift to Aragorn. The next chapter is up, I hope you like it. I return briefly to Boromir, but then it's all Aragorn and exit Boromir. As far as the dialogue, Boromir had so little to say in FOTR. Surely these conversations must have taken place. I can't tell you how I scoured that tome looking for the nuances of who said what to whom and why.

Raksha The DemonReviewed Chapter: 7 on 6/17/2004
Dang! You're right, Boromir and Denethor do look like each other.

I still think Denethor bears the brunt of responsibility over the estrangement from Faramir. I can't hear the tone of his voice in the story, but Faramir says it sounds like he's discussing the weather. If my father told me that he should have revealed my mother's suicide long ago, and the suicide happened when I was a child and I witnessed it, and my father were speaking so coolly about the event, I'd be hopping mad too.

I assume you mean, by the Big Blowup, the confrontation between father and son in THE SIEGE OF GONDOR. While it's true that Faramir let fly a stinging verbal dart of his own at his father, he did not do so until Denethor has castigated him for several paragraphs and then says he wishes Faramir and Boromir's places had been exchanged. Tolkien says "For a moment Faramir's restraint gave way"; and then Faramir delivers the line asking Denethor to remember that the Lord of the City gave the errand to Boromir. It sounds like Faramir had been controlling himself, keeping his anger and sorrow under wraps, and couldn't take it anymore; and that's when he gave that rather stinging retort, he had taken all he could from his father. Don't forget that Faramir had spent days in battle and retreat, come directly under the Black Breath of the Nazgul, watched many comrades die as he tried to hold the rest together, and then gets called on the carpet by his father.

And if I were a parent, even if I had quarreled with my son, if he had come back from a dangerous military operation where he lost comrades and almost his own life, was exhausted, and I was sending him out to risk his life the next day, I would manage to put aside my own worries enough to show a little more kindness and concern, or at least convey the idea that I valued his life.

My biggest beef with Denethor in ROTK, well, other than his deserting his duty (which can be excused by madness)and trying to burn his son alive (Faramir is going to need sooooo much therapy!), is that during their brief conversation, he sounds like he's more Faramir's boss or older brother; he does not sound like a father.

And do keep posting. You are one of the best writers at this site or any others; and I want more Faramir stories from you after you finish this one.

Author Reply: Agreed and agreed and agreed. But there are a lot of nuances in that conversation. My point is, that as awful as things were for Faramir, Dad was having a time of it just as horrible. It doesn't excuse his actions, it might serve to explain them.

The suicide is my own construct, but doesn't violate canon and seems reasonable from the way JRRT couches his explanations of how Finduilas died. Father/Son relationships can be complex, the instinct is to protect. I think Denethor meant to protect his sons, but circumstances overran him. So Dad is in Free Fall also. They all are.

How did Denethor speak to Faramir? He was his liege as well as his Father. I don't think it was Denethor's intent his sons be hurt. In that same appendix it mentions that Denethor took his wife's death with difficulty also.

Why is Denethor so cool in his speech with Faramir? Because he's Steward and leaders don't have the luxury to cry in public. Maybe Denethor thought it likewise applied to his son. Maybe it spoke so coolly because the only way he could approach the subject was by distancing himself from it. But Denethor shows his emotion in the act of clenching his fist. He's controlled. So is Faramir. The two dance about each other as great lumbering bears, as Boromir says.

I've got billions of Faramir stories. Just click on my name, send me emails about which interest you. thanks for the compliments. I eat 'em up and they don't have calories. You've made my night! Lindorien

MirkwoodmaidenReviewed Chapter: 1 on 6/17/2004
Lindorien!

Hello!

I've this before and I had forgotten how much I enjoyed it! I can't pinpoint the exact changes but somehow the story seemed more full. You handle dialog really well between Faramir and Boromir. Two grown brothers bonded by the love they have for each other. I am really enjoying the story.

MIrkwoodmaiden

Author Reply: Mirkwoodmaiden! Hi! Haven't seen you in a cat's age. I'm glad this version is a more satisfying read. I really thought hard about doing a rewrite and the rewriting is harder than I thought. I'm so pleased that people are willing to wade through it a second time. Hope it continues to satisfy. Lindorien

Raksha The DemonReviewed Chapter: 7 on 6/17/2004
Ooh, a fascinating chapter! The conversation between Denethor and Faramir is particularly heartbreaking. They can't talk to each other. Though I blame Denethor more; to speak of Faramir's mother so coolly, then to accuse Faramir of sending Boromir away when Faramir wanted so much to take the errand himself is wrong, not to mention childish.

Excellent recap of the Fellowship's adventures through Boromir's eyes and to a lesser extent, Aragorn's.

Minor quibble - I think that Tolkien mentioned in the ROTK appendices that Boromir did not physically resemble Denethor, and that Faramir did.

Can't wait for the next chapter; it's been too long since I read the earlier version of the story.

Author Reply:
Grumbling, Lindorien pulls up her html version of ROTK and checks out the appendix, then she turns to Raksha and says, 'Nope! Says right here they both looked like him.'

That settled, she further mentions, 'I took the liberty of having Faramir look a lot like mom, also. It's mentioned in the author's notes. Kids are often an odd mixture of both parents.'

Okay, on to other matters. I agree about Denethor. It's always the parent's responsibility to deal with things, although, the warranty on blaming parents for adult troubles runs out at about age thirty. I think their both acting childish, or at least stubborn. Let's face it, Denethor apologized. Pretty big stuff for the guy. I take the attitude that it takes two to tango and these two had years of picking at each other before The Big Blowup, but that likewise there would be plenty of moments of normalcy. Chances are excellent they had years and years of relative normal, only somewhat dysfunctional behavior. I drop into the story at the point things are in, well, um, Free Fall. Normal tensions exacerbated by circumstances and the one who likely helped to keep things calm goes absent. By the time Boromir's horn and corpse turn up - Denethor and his son have managed to hammer well and truly all the nails into the coffin.

You know even during The Big Blowup, both Faramir and his father had plenty of opportunity to pull it back from the brink - neither did, they both went at each other.

So - glad you are liking it and I'm rewriting as fast as I can. I can't believe how long this is taking. Keep encouraging me - I'm going nuts here. Seriously. Lindorien. By the way - if you find any typos or anything, please let me know this thing is going up unbeta'd.

Rose SaredReviewed Chapter: 6 on 6/16/2004
Ah, phew, back to third person narrative, perhaps it is just that I am an old stick in the mud?

This read very nicely and moved the action on, good interactions between the members of the fellowship and it is interesting to follow Faramir's command. Keep shining.
Rose

Author Reply:
Naw! You're not an old stick in the mud - I rarely like first person myself. It's so hard to make it seem like it's NOT first person. The previous chapter was my first attempt at it. When I reread it for this rewrite all I saw was 'I I I I I' - and I went 'Ay yiyiyi' which is what one of my realworld groupies did to me the first time I presented a short story that way. Circled every 'I'. I was so embarrassed!

So I switched it to third person, then he circled every leading 'she' or 'he'. After that I took up drinking.

But I'm relieved you liked this chapter, else I'd return to my previous career as a breakfast cereal taster. Lindorien

Rose SaredReviewed Chapter: 5 on 6/16/2004
Goodness first person POV is difficult. Faramir's friend tells his story well enough, but somehow it removed me from the story, rather than making the action more intimate, having said that Boromir's bit in first person works just fine for me - perhaps it is because he already has a voice in my head. Dunno

You have a bit of tense confusion in this line "we outpaced the ability of our house to contain us and spilling into the streets." and I have a feeling that perhaps the whole of the first bit could do with a shake in the construction department, to many hads perhaps? I am not clever enough about grammer to tell. I just know that the second part of the chp flowed much better than the first.

Hey I still think you are an awsome writer, please don't let me discourage you, the story itself is riveting.

Rose


Author Reply: I hear and I obey, Mistress Rose. I made some changes. Dumped as many of the hads and haves as I could. I'm constantly having that drummed into me - AVOID PASSIVE VOICE, AVOID OVERUSE OF HAD, HAVE, HAS - I hear it in my dreams.

It's true - those sounds quickly wear on the mental ear and become tiresome to read. The first part of the chapter suffers from excessive 'making up a new scenario' since I pulled the first scenario for use elsewhere. Sooooooo...lots of times, if the seams appear a little loose, it's because this is a fic and I limit the attention it receives and I'm constantly poaching from my own work. So any commentary anybody makes is appreciated. This piece has been beta'd, but much of that beta disappeared in the need to make the thing more active and present. Otherwise, my fics are unbeta'd. What you read is what pops off my word processor. I save those willing to edit my stuff for the O-work.

In other words, I truly appreciate your commentary and I value it, as you are quite a good writer yourself. So comment away and I will fix as I can. I'm glad the story is keeping you interested. I do think this version is better. Chapter 7 is up, I hope your feelings about this fic hold. Hugs Lindorien.

ElvenesseReviewed Chapter: 4 on 6/16/2004
Since you want me to get into Lindorien Mode you could always facilitate by writing another chapter of Trials and Tribs...

Then the Tower Guard will say to you, ‘Look! The Lord of Gondor has returned!’” And that's just cruel - he dies, there's no need to rub our faces in it.

On rereading the chapter, I see what you mean. I'm not sure whether I prefer it, but there is more structure and the conversation progresses in a more consistent fashion.


Author Reply:
So - I can mark you down as 'undecided'?

Big, broad grin.

Yep - Boromir's dead. Dead as a doornail. Blame the professor, not I. Haven't hit that chapter yet. I could let Boromir duck, if you like. Course, then I have to trash most of the ending, let him come home, scarf up Eowyn, piss Faramir off...hmmmm... I did a version a little bit like that. Somewhere around here...

Trials and Tribs - Council of Elrond. I haven't a deadline on that, so I delay. I'm difficult that way.

Itsa coming, itsa coming, as my grandmom used to say.

ElvenesseReviewed Chapter: 4 on 6/16/2004
Can I be annoying and say that I liked the old version of this chapter? Having an all dialogue chapter is unusual but it worked, although the banter was a little light-hearted at the beginning. That said, there are some additions in this one that I like as well.

I went and read the passage where Boromir tells Gandalf that now would be a good time to light a fire. I'd read it as Boromir being pragmatic as he's rather grim most of the time. Then again you could take, "Doubtless we shall be hidden from all unfriendly eyes when the snow has covered us," as grim humour.


Author Reply:
Aw, c'mon, Elvenesse - get into Lindorien Mode and reread that passage. You HAVE to know that I am going to find that whole fire thing funny. The same way I found the iron gate leading into The Old Forest an absolute scream. I am warped! Warped, I tell you!

Be as annoying as you like dear. In Lindorienland we strive for annoying. Imrahoil, the other side of this v.1 or v.2 debate re: chapter 4 has tossed me over and decided to join you in your approval of the v.1.

Unfortunately, I've decided I like v.2 better. BECAUSE, it's better structured. Each bit of conversation can be read somewhat lightly or only seriously, but they each end with Faramir begging his brother to stay. The first bit is a little lighthearted - Boromir is leaving all sorts of last minute advice and admonishments for his brother (wear your galoshes, don't forget to take a sweater...) and Faramir is being a good boy and saying, 'Okay, okay, okay, gotcha, check, uh huh - don't talk to strangers, okay, Boromir - by the way, don't leave.'

Shall revisit the question when I'm done the rewrite. This was supposed to take a couple of days at most. Seriously. I must stop obsessing! hugs Lindorien

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