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| The First Snowfall by Manderly | 14 Review(s) |
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| daw the minstrel | Reviewed Chapter: 1 on 1/13/2005 |
| The image of the six snowy lumps that just don't look right was heartbreaking. No, none of them is right just now. And Legolas's need for his mother was so real. I'm glad they can all draw comfort from one another though. Author Reply: The six snowy lumps are really reflective of the entire family right now, broken and devastated. Death will certainly do that to a family, but fortunately they are a very tight-knitted family and will be able to support each other through this. | |
| Avon | Reviewed Chapter: 1 on 1/12/2005 |
| Well, you certainly made me howl. It was very well written - heart reanding without wallowing in it. Two minor things I hope you don't mind me mentioning: * 'one long talking to' sounds wrong. It seems modern. 'a long...' to me sounds more Tolkien-ish *Somewhere around there you have a comma at the beginning of a sentence. Author Reply: Thank you for your review and without any malice, I am glad it made you howl. It always gives me a sense of accomplishment when my stories affect readers. And thank you for pointing the two things. Sometimes when I am writing, I find it hard to pick up such discrepancies no matter how many times I proof-read it. I believe my words were "one long audience" but you are right, "a long audience" would have been better. Thank you! | |
| lwarren | Reviewed Chapter: 1 on 1/12/2005 |
| Well, now that I have been reduced to a blubbering mass of tears...What a sad, heart-rending little tale, Manderly. I knew it was going to be bad when Legolas was thinking about how everyone was not smiling, and being almost scared of Feren...I thought "uh oh, this isn't too far from when he lost his mother...and then that sweet baby started building his little snow figures...six in all for the family. From then on I totally lost it, sentence by sentence. You really outdid yourself, the emotions of Legolas ranging from determination (they did this every first snowfall) to elation (when he thought the footsteps behind him were his Nana) to anger (when it wasn't) to wild grief...were portrayed so clearly and using the tradition of the first snowfall being a "special day" just for the two of them seemed to focus the grief felt by Legolas even more. I liked the ending with Thranduil and Aldeon taking comfort from holding their little bundle of elfling...you know this story really clarifies why they are sooooo protective of Legolas later on (and it's not only because he's the youngest, I think.) Sad, sad, sad, *sniff* sad... and beautifully written! linda Author Reply: Well, I guess I am perversely happy that you were reduced to a blubbering mass of tears. Had you been laughing, my story then would have been a total failure. Anyway, sorry to untap your emotions like that (not really) but the death of a parent is always something very tragic, and for a young child, it's just that much more devastating because it is something that is beyond their comprehension. There's probably a sense of betrayal in that somebody who can love them so much one day and be gone without warning the next. Holding a small child in your arms is such an endless source of comfort. I just wish that my daughters are still small enough that I can cuddle them once in a while. Thank you for your very kind review. | |
| The Karenator | Reviewed Chapter: 1 on 1/12/2005 |
| What a sweet, heart wrenching tale, Manderly. The newness of grief was so tangible. You did such a nice job of capturing the confusion and longing of a child following tragedy. The little snow figures were great. This was such a nice little tradition. I bet Thranduil won't take his eyes off Legolas for many years to come when the first snowfall comes and the king will never see the first snowfall without remembering this occasion and what it meant to Legolas. Oh me...how sad. Poor baby. What happened to Nana anyway? Have you told us this before and I've forgotten? Did she sail or is she dead? I got the feeling that she's gone to Mandos. I really like this. Karen Author Reply: Thank you for your kind words. I've always thought that the link between a mother and her young child is something near sacred and when it breaks, it really is devastating. The occasion was sad enough for Legolas, but I think it was probably worse for the grownups like Thranduil and Aldeon. Like you said, they will probably never see the first snowfall of the season in the same light. I've never really dealt with Nana in my previous stories other than a brief mention in Princeling that she had fallen to the orcs. Really glad you liked the story. | |