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| Caretakers by Grey Wonderer | 112 Review(s) |
|---|---|
| Pervinca | Reviewed Chapter: 18 on 5/31/2004 |
| Very clever - it's always great to begin a story at a point that re-occurs later in the story - if that makes any sense at all...I think I'm becoming fluent in Pippish. Glynnith is a lot like many of Pippin's other friends, isn't she! You've done very well with her, and it will be sad to see her go. Perhaps you could somehow work her into another story :) - Pervinca Author Reply: I understand Pippish so you may post all of your reviews in it. LOL I know what you mean. Glad you liked it and that it worked. Now cross your fingers that the rest of this story works. I would love to use Glynnith in another story, but I have no idea how just yet. I am pleased that you like her as I am very attached to her. | |
| melilot hill | Reviewed Chapter: 18 on 5/31/2004 |
| Great chapter. He’d seen her like before and he knew she was no one to be messin with. shouldn't this be He'd seen the likes of her before or something simmilar? and I think messin should be messin'. Sam supposed that came from being the youngest and haing always been looked-after and watched over by someone. This should be having. Frodo could see that Pippin was explaining his wounds to the lads., but he couldn’t make out what was being said. You have a full stop and a comma here. Author Reply: Thanks again. I got these corrections done also. Don't worry, we are getting close to the end of the story now so you are about through with your corrections. Glad you enjoyed this chapter. | |
| melilot hill | Reviewed Chapter: 17 on 5/31/2004 |
| Yes! Pippin can go outside again. I like your OC Glynnith. She's gruff and stern but also has a good heart. Behind him Holmar cranked his neck to get a view of just what the King of Gondor had brought to his new friend. Shouldn't this be craned his neck? Now, if only, Frodo continued to improve. I don't know about that second comma. I think it can be left out. It might, at least relieve some of Frodo's worries.. I think this comma can be left out too. You can hardly wonder through the camp in that sorry excuse for a night shirt, now can you, Emil I Pheriannath?" Should be Ernil I Pheriannath I don't know if this was just a typing error, but if you have troubles with names of characters or places you should check out this site (Encyclopedia of Arda): http://www.glyphweb.com/arda/ "Suppose when the King brings you a gift, that would be the least ye ought do," Glynnith said. shouldn't this be ought to do or ought to? "You go careful, now and if you need any help, you want to let someone know." I think the first comma can be left out. It was just want was proper is all, for a soldier and for one of his royal station." I think this should be what. Author Reply: I am glad that you can see Glynnith's good intentions show through in this. I want her to be gruff, but I do want readers to realize that she means well and that she is realy a sweet person. Just finished doing the corrections that you left on this one. Thanks! | |
| Elenar | Reviewed Chapter: 18 on 5/31/2004 |
| Oops,Sorry thats my review below,forget to leave my name. Author Reply: I do that too sometimes. LOL Glad to know someone else does it. | |
| Reviewed Chapter: 18 on 5/31/2004 | |
| I'm so happy that Merry gets to finally see Pippin.I can't wait for the next chapter. I also liked that Pippin was so happy just to have clothes that fit and then I loved the conversation about hand-me-downs. Your connection between the first chapter and this worked well. Author Reply: Thank you. I wanted the entire thing to come together and I was hoping I'd managed it. It is good to know that it worked. I suspect that Sam did have hand-me-downs and I thought he might sympathize with the over-sized clothing issue that Pippin had been dealing with. I am glad that you liked their conversation. Thanks for reviewing. | |
| Elenar | Reviewed Chapter: 17 on 5/31/2004 |
| I love how Pippin just knew that the clothes were Glynnith's idea. I am really beginning to like her character. Author Reply: Oh, good! I wanted him to know because she had spoken with him before about it, but I worried that it might be too much of a stretch for him to know. I am glad it worked. I'm also pleased that you like Glynnith. Thank you for reviewing. | |
| Tialys | Reviewed Chapter: 16 on 5/30/2004 |
| I love your story so far. You've centered - or at least touched on - a really original point with how Pippin comes to realize that he might have not appreciated all Merry did for him. I really enjoyed that new perspective. Poor Pippin, though. Author Reply: Thank you. I went in a different direction on this topic for some reason. I am glad that you are enjoying it. Thank you for the review and don't worry about Pippin too much. I can never end these thing badly. I am a happy ending person, especially when it comes to the hobbits, | |
| Pearl Took | Reviewed Chapter: 16 on 5/30/2004 |
| This a wonderful story!!!! I'm so sorry I've been so long in getting around to reading it. I shall do better at keeping up from now on :-) Pearl Took Author Reply: I am glad to have you stop by whenever you get the chance. So pleased that you like this one. I went slightly in a different way on Pippin's healing and I wasn't too sure it would go over well, but every9one has been very nice. Thank you for taking time to read and review. I am looking forward to another story from you soon. (hint hint) | |
| Elenar | Reviewed Chapter: 16 on 5/30/2004 |
| Another great chapter. I wonder when Aragon will find out that it was Gimli and the hobbits who took his ale. I love how Merry acts all innocent so that even Sam believes him. Author Reply: I thought Sam might not suspect that Merry would do anything that tricky. I think Sam tends to believe that everyone has good intentions until he is proven wrong. Aragorn is bound to notice at some point that his supply is dangerously low. Thanks for the review. | |
| Elenar | Reviewed Chapter: 15 on 5/30/2004 |
| Poor Gimli, I wonder if he has any ale left.I liked Legolas worrying for Gimli. It was also nice to see Beregond visit Pippin. Author Reply: Yes, Gimli may have met his match as far as the ale goes. So glad you enjoyed Beregond. I thought that he might visit Pippin as they were good firends when Pippin was in need of a friend. Even though Merry isn't around, I don't want Pip to get lonely. Thanks for reading and reviewing. | |