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| Shire: Beginnings by Lindelea | 93 Review(s) |
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| Pearl Took | Reviewed Chapter: 12 on 12/10/2003 |
| 'I only need one,' Pick said reasonably. 'Or do you prefer to be called "Hoi, you there"?' A wonderful Lindelea story that runs me no troubles with my own meanderings!!!! This is a joy to read! Something tells me Peregrin Took is a direct desendant of Pickthorn!! And I love that you have told us how Mithrandir came by the name Gand-alf!! Pearl Took Author Reply: Thank you, Pearl, how nice to see you here! I suspect you are right about Peregrin Took... though I had someone else in mind (this will be made clear at the very end, I think). It was lots of fun coming up with origins for "goblins" and "Gandalf" and a few other things. Hope no one gets huffy over my version! Glad you stopped by. | |
| eiluj | Reviewed Chapter: 12 on 12/9/2003 |
| Just to say that I am very much enjoying this story (don't I always?). I hadn't imagined hobbits starting out in a thick forest, but it works. After all these 37-years-almost-to-the-day of reading Tolkien, I had somehow managed to miss the existence of the Mountains of Mirkwood! (Maybe that just proves I'm not obsessed with Legolas.) I have only ever read one other pre-Shire hobbit story, not at all like this one. It used to be on the Barrow-Downs site but seems to have been weeded. Author Reply: I certainly hope you always do! They didn't actually start out in the thick forest, though that is where their "wandering days" started. I imagined them as farming folk before they became forest folk. Very versatile, these hobbits. I haven't read any pre-Shire hobbit stories! Didn't know any existed. I'm glad to know that there are readers out there who are willing to chance a story with no familiar characters to anchor the tale. Thanks for the review! | |
| FantasyFan | Reviewed Chapter: 11 on 12/8/2003 |
| This is an interesting chapter. Here you use 'Thorn' as if it were a title more than a family name, as I had assumed. Are we to think of it as the origin of the word 'Thain?' I wonder what the Tolkien etymologists would make of that (there are such people, you know)... I am not sure if I like calling attention to the quaint use of the familiar form by the hobbits, and then dispensing with it. I know Tolkien says that the hobbits did use the familiar, and that those in Gondor were surpried by Pippin's address of Denethor so, believing that it must connote high status in his own land as the Prince of the Halflings, yet Tolkien did not show the archaic form except for very rarely, and not by the hobbits in their own speech or as delivered to others. I think I would either ignore it completely or retain the familiar for the hobbits speaking to the elves, but not call attention to it. I am personally not fond of notes addressed to the readers in the midst of the text. The fact that the Thorn can hear the Lady directly, especially in urgent or dangerous situations, is very interesting. It certainly surprises the elves who, somewhat smugly in my opinion, pride themselves on hearing Illuvitar's song better than any other race. Actually, they are surprised by the Hobbits woodcraft, their speech and their knowledge. All that from a very simple and innocent race - very worth watching in the future. And Glorfindel taking orders from this little creature is quite an image. The elves have definitely been helped by the hobbits here. What will the legendary curiousity of the Elves lead them to do next? I can't believe they'll just walk away from them.... Author Reply: Well, I'm told that Tolkien took the term "Thain" from the Scottish chieftains, to approximate a word in hobbit-language, just like all his other names are approximations translated from whatever you'd call hobbit-language. (Hobbitish?) I did research "Gandalf" as far as I could and came up with no definite origin other than that it was the name he was called by the Men of the North, so I have had fun imagining my own origin, in addition to the hobbits' very practical adaptation of the word "goblins". There is at least one more distintive feature of Gandalf that will "originate" in this story. Thorn is a family name, and a title as well (and the story was written, by design, to have that fact become gradually evident to the reader). Perhaps this family passes down the trait of being able to hear the Lady of the Wood. After the Lady sends them out to seek a new land, the leadership will not necessarily be tied to the one family--though I suspect the Tooks are descended from the Thorns. I have not found a surname for Marcho and Blanco anywhere, and unless I find otherwise before fleshing out the outlined chapters, they will be Thorns as well, though I think they change their name in the new land... that is only outlined, not written, and thus subject to change. I must admit, I deliberately called attention to the familiar form because of my own shock at realising, 25 years after reading the original for the first time, that "thee" and "thou" is what JRRT meant when he said the hobbits' speech was quaint by the standards of the people of Minas Tirith. I think I must have read it in an appendix, or perhaps one of JRRT's letters, but only within the last few months. I'm sure it is not in the text or I would have noticed it in one of my annual re-reads (and these are not deliberately scheduled, mind, it is just that I turn to this book whenever sick in bed and stuck with nothing else to do. It is a comfort read to be sure.) I will rethink in accordance with your comments, especially if I hear a second opinion to the same effect. You have mentioned before your dislike of author asides. I avoid these as much as possible, but evidently not enough! *grin* "The Hobbit" has disappeared again (under someone's bed, no doubt)--we have only three copies, perhaps a fourth is needed, to be chained to the bookshelf! Thus I cannot cross-check my gut feeling that Thranduil was not familiar with hobbits, though Elrond was. Therefore I have devised a way for the hobbits *not* to accompany the Rivendell elves to the North. Hopefully it is plausible. Perhaps the reader is asking the logical question: Why don't modern hobbits hear voices in their heads? I think the spirit (Valar probably) who is the Lady of the Wood has decided that it is time for hobbits to grow; she has mothered them long enough, and while they were engaging children she has great hopes for their future. It is interesting that she has nurtured the future of the Ring-bearer as well, was this all part of Illuvatar's song? I am just getting into the Sil again, after laying it down 20 years ago. I must admit it adds such depth and richness to Tolkien's world. That comment in itself sounds trite and obvious, sorry, you cannot know the wonder that infuses it. I suspect that the Rivendell elves won't say much about the hobbits to Thranduil, or what they do say will scarcely be believed. But the Rivendell elves will meet with the Fallohides again, on the other side of the mountains. The Lady, after all, has promised that the People will survive. Whew, this has gained the length of a chapter! Sorry to ramble so! My editor is "on vacation" and I have no one else to ramble at, at the moment... | |
| FantasyFan | Reviewed Chapter: 7 on 12/3/2003 |
| I'm sorry I haven't got to review much, there's just been no time, no time, no time! But I couldn't let this one go by. GRAND-ALF!!!! BBWWAAHAHAHA! It's so perfect! You have an incredible wit. I wonder how the Grey Wanderer felt becoming known to the royalty of Rohan and Gondor with a name invented by a three foot shoeless proto-hobbit? I'm glad the hobbits went after the orcs and wanted to protect the Grey One, not that he really needed the help. They try to pay their debt for the rescue of Pick, and show from the beginning that there's more to them than might be implied by their appearance. In return, they've got Gandalf's attention, and help for their a-journeying. Saruman would have just blown them off. Gandalf's got to be curious about this folk that don't appear in any of the old lists, as Treebeard would say. They aren't of the Firstborn, but not quite like the Second Children of Illuvitar, either. They are kind and respectful to each other in this first meeting. And a relationship starts that will end up saving the world - no coincidences in Tolkien's universe. I hope Gandalf pops up again somewhere in your story, as I imagine they'll need some more help sometime before they finally reach the Shire. How will he be remembered through the generations to come? Might Elrond lend a hand as well? This story is quite engaging. I'm as curious as a hobbit to see what comes next. Author Reply: It was lovely to find your review. I understand about being busy! Somehow, though, a response helps me feel that I'm not just talking to myself. Since Frodo, Merry and Pippin are descended from Fallohides, I figure there's got to be something good there! And yes, the hobbits will have more encounters with Gandalf, and Arwen and her brothers, and eventually Elrond, though perhaps not the wood elves (must do a quick re-read of the Hobbit as I am not sure Thranduil recognised Bilbo the way he might've had he run across hobbits before). The People have a ways to go before they're driven to cross the mountains, an adventure in itself! And then there's the bit of story that comes after the mountain crossing... more fun in store, I think. | |
| FantasyFan | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 11/30/2003 |
| Looks to me like there's every reason to pack up and find a better place to live, and absolutely no reason left to stay. We always stick with what's familiar and comfortable, until it becomes uncomfortable enough that a change is less scary than remaining with the old. Now, the threat of physical violence is very high, and there aren't even any familiar posessions left to tie them to the old hole. I wonder how they will decide where to go - I don't imagine the step from the forest over the mountains to Bree took place all at once. Will Pick's positive experience with the Grey One and the Lady lead them to seek out advice, or will another fortunate chance guide them? I would like to see Gandalf taking an interest in the hobbits. Author Reply: I think the answer to your question, how they decide where to go, is in the next chapter. It all sounds mystical, but I'm sure the Valar are watching over them... or at least one of the Valar is... which one walked under the eaves of Greenwood in the early days, I forget, but the hobbits never forgot her. | |
| FantasyFan | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 11/28/2003 |
| I take it all back! (LOL) There are plenty of familiar characters in this story, and the new hobbits are plenty engaging in themselves. This is shaping up to have some interesting ideas in it. I would love to see the simple hobbits helping to influence the decisions of the wise about what to do with the threat, and I would also like to see the compassion of the Elves and the meddlesome nature of Gandalf helping shape what happens to the hobbit ancestors. It all comes around in the end, doesn't it! | |
| Grey Wonderer | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 11/28/2003 |
| I like Pick. This will be a difficult story to tell without all of the regulars but I think you are doing a terrific job. I am already interested in these characters and their lives. I am interested to see what happenes when this nice "stranger" takes this child home to momma. Never did give Pick his name did he? Very clever at avoiding that question. Knows his hobbits, feed them and they will forget their questions for a while at least. Author Reply: Yes, I believe he's already become familiar with the Harfoots, who crossed the mountains a century before. I think they were in Eriador shortly after he came over the Sea to Middle-earth. | |
| trishette | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 11/27/2003 |
| Hmmm... I wonder if the one in gray could possibly be Gandalf? Author Reply: It does sound a bit like him, doesn't it? (hope so, anyhow) | |
| Tim the Enchanter | Reviewed Chapter: 2 on 11/26/2003 |
| The story of the Leaf family is chilling. This chapter is considerably darker than the previous one. Author Reply: Quite a bit; that's why there's a PG rating. I find orcs and ruffians to be darkening influences on a story... Author Reply: Have to add, it won't get much darker. I don't go in for writing descriptions of things such as what the orcs did to the hobbits they captured. Imagination is quite enough. | |
| Marilla | Reviewed Chapter: 2 on 11/26/2003 |
| Hmm, I don't know that I've seen one of these before. I like the addition of the prologue - it IS helpful. Are they called the Thorn family because all of their names end in "-thorn?" I'm assuming that the reference to the black squirrels and water are too get across that they're living in the part of Greenwood that is near Dol Gulder (or where it will be - I'm not really sure where its building fits on the timeline in relation to this story)? Also, having Holly "call" the neighbors is a little confusing - to my extremely modern mind in brings up an image of a little hobbit girl on a telephone, which although it is a cute image isn't what I think you're trying to get across. Maybe you could phrase it differently, or make there seem like enough time for her to have run to a few holes? I'm interested in this story, and I will be watching its progress and anxiously awaiting the updates. Author Reply: Thanks for the comments. I will look at that part again, perhaps change "call" to "fetch". I did envision the hobbit community living within a fairly close distance of each other since they are not farming... and even if they were farming (I don't know how it is in England, but in Germany it is this way), often you have a cluster of farmers living together and farming the fields surrounding their little community. However, I might've let too little time elapse for Holly to finish "fetching" the neighbours! In the timeline I have (Appendix B) chronology it says that a shadow falls on Greenwood in 1050 (and the Harfoots come to Eriador), that the Wise discover the stronghold in Dol Guldur in 1100, and in 1150 the Fallohides enter Eriador, while the Stoors come over the Redhorn Pass. So those are the dates I'm working from. They're actually about halfway between Dol Guldur and the Old Forest Road when the story starts. Thanks for the encouragement. I hope to post a chapter a day as I get the already-written stuff formatted, and then keep posting as new chapters are written. Comments are always welcome, especially when they point out flaws that are correctable. (Fatal flaws? Ummm, don't quite know what to say...) Author Reply: There, I changed the wording a bit so that Holly ends up "whistling up" her brothers nad sisters, which fits; whistled signals would carry farther than voice, I think. I also changed "call" to "call to", and hope it no longer conjurs up images of telephones... We hardly ever use our telephone. The phone line serves more as a link to the internet than anything else. I must admit, to me, "to call" is to lift up one's voice rather than a telephone receiver. | |