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Okay, NOW Panic!  by Boz4PM 15 Review(s)
EilenachReviewed Chapter: 41 on 2/1/2007
What a beautiful chapter! I especially enjoyed the clothes-washing vignette, where the women were scolded for not being sufficiently serious. I can just feel how the mood of the entire city would have become more and more somber as the funeral drew nearer.

I'm sure that Theoden's funeral would have been a very cathartic event, and very healing for everyone involved. It was an occasion where weeping was acceptable, even encouraged. Every person there had great reason to weep, and you captured them all in the last paragraph with Penny's weeping.


AspenJulesReviewed Chapter: 41 on 1/26/2007
First of all, Boz, let me say how glad I am that you are on the mend. It's amazing how just small improvements can be such a relief when you've been ill for quite a while. Here's hoping your recovery is steady and permanent.

As for this chapter, what can I say that hasn't been said? The funeral was amazing. Some touches I loved:

That Penny couldn't understand much of what was said. This goes without saying, of course, but... having attended functions held in a language which I only understand slightly, her reactions were perfect. She felt and reacted to the mood without being distracted by the actual words being said. That in itself lent itself to her grieving for all the losses, those of her own past as well as all the losses of ME.

Merry's grief at Theoden's tomb. I don't know why it is, but his grief at the death and funeral of Theoden has as much power to move me to tears as anything in the whole story, and your recounting was no exception. It was simply, but very beautifully, portrayed.

Kind of going in reverse order here as I think of them: the Dunadain who suggested Penny stand with the rest as she was now "one of them." I loved that his reaction showed how much Penny is accepted by them. She is so 'accepted' that it didn't even occur to him that it would be inappropriate for her as a woman to stand with the rest of them.

I got a kick out of the men, and older women, who worked to 'tone down' the washing day gaiety. LOL, been there, been scolded for it. It's so easy when engaging in such mundane chores to forget the setting sometimes, and have to be 'taken down a peg' for it. It gave me a bit of a chuckle. Thanks!

Lastly, since this has gone on *so* long, I love the little hints that Gandalf *still* knows more than he is telling, when they come to inform Elrond and Aragorn of Penny's decision. Will we ever know what he has foreseen (or guessed)? OH, and the teasing of Aragorn was also priceless, so very well done, and good for another chuckle.

All in all, thanks so much for yet another pearl in the strand of your story, Boz. You're truly creating a work of art, a thing of beauty. Well done.

Author Reply: Thank you, yes, I'm much improved. Here's hoping the cold snap doesn't trigger another bout, though. Am taking Vitamin C and echinacea like there's no tomorrow. *lol*

Thanks for your comments. I'm glad you felt Penny's response was fitting. The mood in the camp and the rest has been building towards this, and as Bodkin and I agreed below, Penny is now at a stage where she is finally allowing herself to consider and accept certain things that mean, yes, she is grieving as much as the rest of them, and the 'mood' around her helps her to express it - both generally and in that specific moment.

As for the Dunedain, I think the moment they knew that Halbarad had planned to take care of her that would, in itself, have been enough for them, let alone the fact that she has/had the patronage of Elrond and Aragorn. They accepted her back in Minas Tirith, but it's taken these past few weeks, especially with the clear concern and wisdom she's shown re. Halladan, for them to truly express it and let her know.

Real life carries on, no matter what else occurs. It's one of those weirdly awful realisations you get when you have lost someone - life continues. As such, yes, it's perfectly reasonable and realistic for people to forget themselves during a time of official mourning. It's also been some months since Theoden actually died, so... yeah. Glad that amused, though. ;D

Oh, I'm SO glad someone's mentioned those little moments of Gandalf's I do throw out from time to time. And, yes, I hope to make it clear at the end - either a last conversation he has before he sails, or something Elrond says to her, dunno yet. But, yes, it will be made clear, and, yes, they ARE deliberate.

Thanks for reading!

AnneReviewed Chapter: 41 on 1/26/2007

Tears for the fallen
the shattered, the dead.
Tears for survivors
Alone in their beds.
Tears for the Valient,
that gave all they had.
Tears for us all
When our memories grow cold
Tears for us all
that will never grow old




Author Reply: Beautiful. I'm touched. Thank you.

Abra AhabReviewed Chapter: 41 on 1/25/2007
Hurrah! I knew it!! It won't be long before Halladan realizes there's just no resisting Penny's charms. That is, if she lets him. lol

This chapter was so beautiful and strong. I love the small glimpse into Penny's past and would also love to see more. The more I think about it, the more interesting I find the situation in which Penny has found herself. With the recent release of census data in the US on how the majority of modern women are unmarried, it places a stark picture on how far we've come. Penny is in a completely different world, unable to rely on herself and for more than one reason. Not only has she no skill, but she would face the fear and ostracization of a community with no understanding of feminine independence. It's no wonder that she finds herself at wit's end more than once!

Thanks again for a wonderful chapter. I look forward to seeing what happens next. How far do you think you'll take this story? I'm really interested to see how the Scouring of the Shire works out and if there will be any fingers pointed.

You just keep on writing, honey, and I'll just keep on gobbling it up!!

Author Reply: Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it. What you say about the realities of your average modern western woman as compared to that of an average human female in Middle-earth is VERY true and EXACTLY the point. Penny is constrained and entirely out of her depth for all sorts of reasons and from all sides in many respects. She HAD to change and adapt or risk insanity or rejection - neither possibilities that bear thinking about.

I know where I'll end this. I've always known. Things keep extending the length of this fic, such as when I realise certain things HAVE to be covered in detail, but in terms of overall story arc I know where I'm at and where I'm heading. How many chapters it will take to write it all, I am not sure. I am hoping (famous last words) to get to the point of leaving Edoras by the end of the next chapter, and then (hopefully, and again if descriptions of Isengard and Helm's Deep don't delay me too much) up to Aragorn's leaving the party by the end of the next chapter. Then another to reach Imladris (again, I hope, but it remains flexible). The time covering the Scouring of the Shire will be dealt with, yes. :)

MopsyReviewed Chapter: 41 on 1/23/2007
Major love to you for this, Boz. :D *does the Penny dance* *John Travolta moves*

The burial was so moving...the last paragraph really struck me. Poor Penny. She's lost everyone she ever knew...and in such a terrible way, just cut off, without a chance to say goodbye. I'm glad she's really becoming aware of her grief now, because it means she can start to heal. :) And therefore make lots of babies with Halladan. :)

Author Reply: *does the Penny dance* *John Travolta moves*
*LOL*

She's lost everyone she ever knew...and in such a terrible way, just cut off, without a chance to say goodbye.
Exactly so. And they had no chance to say goodbye to her either - she feels that terribly.

Glad you enjoyed it. :D

MargoReviewed Chapter: 41 on 1/22/2007
I'm usually a lurker, but I've recently realized just how much feedback means to authors, and I realized that it would be unconscionable of me not to tell you how much I've enjoyed reading 'Don't Panic' and 'Okay, NOW Panic!' I stumbled upon them year or two ago when you posted an update on this site. The immediate disclaimer that it was NOT a Mary-Sue caught my eye, and I immediately read everything you'd posted so far. Since then I've had less time for fanfiction, but I come back here at least every month to see if Penny's story has been updated. I don't think I can express how wonderful these two epics are. The characters are so rich, and I love your perspective on Middle Earth and Tolkien's familiar characters. Penny and others make me cringe sometimes, which only adds to the realism. These are living, breathing, make-total-fools-of-themselves people, and I love them. I also admire how you show the slow growth of the relationship between Penny and Halladan, as well as Penny's struggle to come to terms with her life in Middle Earth and the loss of her family. So, thank you so much for sharing this with all of us, and know that I, and I am sure many others, eagerly await your posts - and reread whenever we get the chance!

Author Reply: Thank you so much for taking time out to comment and let me know how much you've enjoyed the stories so far - it means a lot to hear such things. I'm glad that you've found the characters and plot 'real' - something that has always been important to me in this fic right from the get-go, that it should all 'ring true' and be as believable as possible.

Thank you for reading. :)

MissReviewed Chapter: 41 on 1/21/2007
Thank goodness,you've updated....

“Shall we retire to my tent?”
....
My heart was thumping very fast!! I was so exited about their reactions!

It warms my heart that Penny still has a chance to visit Imlardis for on last time. It was a good desicion, because might want to say their farewells....

The last part of this chapter was very mooving. I felt so sorry for Penny.

Where did you leave Penny's dearest elf friend (gosh!! I forgot his name!!!!!!) The one who learend her horseback riding. Does he know about her descion? I learned (in the previous chapters) that he is more close to Penny than Mirith and Eleniel. I guess the funeral part was your firt priority.

Good chapter!!!


Author Reply: I'm glad you enjoyed it - thanks for taking time out to review.

You mean Lindir, I assume? ;D The thing is much of the story has, by necessity, had to focus on the Dunedain, and Halladan in particular, as well as Penny's own issues of late. The elves are around but preoccupied with the coming loss of Arwen - when Lindir leaves Rohan he will never see Arwen again, so too with Mireth. Also the elves have always assumed that Penny would come back to Imladris with them, and many might well have assumed or suspected once Halladan and Arvain took on the role of guardians that she might then one day leave Imladris to stay with them - so it won't be any surprise to them whatsoever.

Lindir has been shown to be quite important within the Imladris hierachy so he would have been involved in the processional with Elrond and the rest.

My apologies for not mentioning him specifically, but his reaction would have been little more than 'And? Is this news?' ;D *lol*

DaynawaynaReviewed Chapter: 41 on 1/20/2007
Yet another amazing chapter my dear. I love how you wrote the burial... very moving. And too, how Penny comes to terms with her own losses in ME and London. I just wish she wouldn't compare her losses to Halladan's or others; her loss is no less than theirs, and she needs to realize that the circumstances of the loss should not belittle the fact that she lost her family. I'm glad she's finally coming to terms with it.

Now it's onward and forward to Rivendell and then.... to Hallbarad's house! :D LOL

Author Reply: Thank you. I'm quite astonished (and thrilled) by how much positive response the burial has had. I hoped it simply made sense, but it seems many found it fitted canon well and moving also - so I'm very pleased!

It's not right of Penny to compare her losses to Halladan, it's true. Alas, it's an all too human thing to do, though. She can only think of Halladan watching Hirvell being butchered to pieces in front of him, the trauma of that moment and how he is suffering as a consequence. She forgets that her situation, as you say, is just as traumatic in some ways. That said she did go through a lot of the process back in Don't Panic, but even so, yes, she know has to go through her own acceptance of the finality of the situation, and it will take some time for that really to sink in.

Now it's onward and forward to Rivendell and then.... to Hallbarad's house!
Indeed! ;D

BodkinReviewed Chapter: 41 on 1/20/2007
That was a very powerfully written funeral ceremony. And very well thought out.

I think everyone is of the mind that Penny has chosen the best place for her - and I'm not surprised that the whole atmosphere of grief has been enough to make her realise what she has lost. She's been too busy just trying to cope up until now - but things are starting to settle down a bit and soon she will just have to get on with life. Halladan is being rather gorgeous, though - and very supportive.



Author Reply: Thanks, Bodkin.

She's been too busy just trying to cope up until now - but things are starting to settle down a bit and soon she will just have to get on with life
That's exactly it, and as that realisation dawns, or at least as she accepts that that is the case, at first her loss will seem all too real in some ways, precisely because she has to finally accept and face it at last (and has the time/ability to do so now a lot of other stuff is out of the way). It will be an emotional time for her, but one that will, ultimately, be much more positive in many senses if only because she is not in limbo anymore - she is looking forward at last.

KittyReviewed Chapter: 41 on 1/20/2007
Glad to see an update :-) And I hope you feel better.

It is good to see how much all of them approve of Penny's decision to stay with the Dúnedain, and I am sure Penny feels the same.

You described the burial so well I could see all of it before my eyes. Very well done! And I think the parts you took not from JRRT but from the old cultures in the north are not only fitting, but correct as well. I did read a bit about excavations of old graves from these cultures and recognised many details in this chapter.

And it was fitting to let Penny grieve for her family in our times just now. No doubt the burial had to trigger these thoughts, and as she has made peace with Elrond and made her decision where to stay, she is not so burdened with these problems any longer and able to accept the repercussions of her decision. Oh, and need I to mention how glad I was that Halladan came after her and comforted her? ;-)

Author Reply: I do feel better, thanks. Still not completely recovered but MUCH improved, thankfully!

I'm so pleased with the reaction the burial seems to have had - that people felt it was detailed enough so that they could follow it clearly and that it seemed both realistic and reasonable in terms of matching canon. And, yeah, it was the right moment for Penny to stop, take stock and reflect on some things she's not really had time to consider before now.

Thanks - I'm glad you enjoyed it!

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