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Of Balrogs and Battles  by Jay of Lasgalen 30 Review(s)
SnehaReviewed Chapter: 2 on 10/6/2015
I love this story! Morgoth tickling Maeglin was hilarious, as was Elrond having to drag the twins out of the pond. Your Glorfindel was wonderful, warm, honest and strong. His love for the twins showed clearly! The description of the fall of Gondolin was evocative, I could see how desperate the situation was and Glorfindel's tremendous courage.
But what an ending! I was laughing away at Erestor joining in with Celebrian over his shoulder and then the last line had me reeling! Awesome story!

harrowcatReviewed Chapter: 2 on 4/3/2006
Wow! you do know how to turn the mood of a piece don't you Jay? Had to look this one up and it is a lot of fun and then you get to the last line!!! Brilliant writing.

Author Reply: ;/

Sorry. I enjoyed writing this, then I thought about what new game the twins would play - and rescuing Nana from orcs seemed typical of them! They didn't know it would come true, did they?

LadyMorrigan87Reviewed Chapter: 2 on 2/21/2006
Wow! That ending was like wow. OMG! I can't think of anything to say besides wow!

Author Reply: Whoops! Sorry, I missed seeing this review.

Yes, the ending was a little unexpected, but I do hope you enjoyed the rest of the tale!


Jay

Estel KenobiReviewed Chapter: 2 on 1/29/2006
Holy sithspit Jay! That was freaking awesome! SO artfully done! So cute and sweet...then WHAM! Out of nowhere comes that suckerpunch. A startling yet beautiful way of showing how innocence cannot last. I give you your props...that was freakin awesome. Did I say that already? Oh well...once more for good measure. F-R-E-A-K-I-N-G A-W-E-S-O-M-E!!!

Author Reply: Does that mean you liked it? :)

Thanks for reviewing this, especially as it's an older story. It was fun writing this, and I love to write about the twins at any age. Towards the end of the story, I began to think about what other games the young twins might play - and unforunately this seemed obvious. One day I might write about Celebrían's rescue, and have one of the twins remember this game. One day.




pipinheartReviewed Chapter: 2 on 8/8/2005
This is a very cute story, even thier mother is palying along with erestor is play, very amuzing...great job...

Author Reply: I think the young twins would find anything about Balrogs or orcs great fun - it's just sad that their game at the end of this story foreshadows such tragedy :(

Thanks for the review!

washowReviewed Chapter: 1 on 12/16/2004
What a cute elfling story. I love Glorfindel and enjoyed his part in your tale. The end was kind of sad with the foreshadowing to their mother’s capture by orcs. Good job.

Author Reply: The twins are my favourite characters, and I like to write about them either as elflings, or adult warriors. One day, perhaps I'll write about Celebrían's capture, and if they remember the game.

Thanks for reviewing!

Jay

paranoidangelReviewed Chapter: 2 on 10/18/2004
I'm so behind on my reading. Had I known how good this was I certainly would have read it sooner.

That was really sweet. I really liked the description Glorfindel didn't tell the twins of them leaving Gondolin. I liked Elrohir disliking being Elrohir - I can see his point. That ending was absolutely terrible though - I mean that in a good way. You really are a horrible nasty person!

Author Reply: How did I miss replying to this? I usually respond the same day.

I'm glad you liked this - and I do know what you mean about the ending. I had to do it, though - it was so much the sort of game the twins would play.

It's not that Elrohir doesn't like who he is, or even being second-born. It's always being 'and Elrohir' he doesn't like.

KalimaReviewed Chapter: 2 on 9/27/2004
Ah! I thought maybe the story was going to darken. It made me cry (something I do more easily now that I have children, particularly whenever grieving parents or grieving children come into play) and smile too. I think your ending was clever. I certainly didn't expect it, and the foreshadowing was perhaps the saddest part of all. I've never had a clear picture of Celebrian, and seeing her so happy, carefree, and loving of her children makes her later fate all the more tragic.

I like having the childhoods of our characters filled in. It makes the original LOTR richer, too. Have you noticed? Even though so many of the fan fics are contradictory, I find that the characters have more depth in general because the writers make them deeper with detail.

So I thank you. And I'm sorry I haven't read more of your stories, but I have them all stored for later reading. I find you a very rewarding writer.

Do you mind a teeny weeny copyedit suggestion? I would recommend hyphenating "panic-sticken cries," just as you have "grief-stricken refugees." (I do so love an author who can hyphenate!)



Author Reply: Poor Celebrian. I wonder if she, or her sons, remembered that game later on? I think she was a very loving mother, or the twins would not have been so set on rescuing and avenging her.

I love writing about these minor characters, as Tolkien told us so little. Their childhoods are great to write about, as there is a blank page to fill in. I like to write about little Legolas too (Thranduil does not abuse him!) for the same reasons.

Thanks so much for your comments. I'm glad you enjoyed reading, and I love getting reviews!

Jay
(PS, thank you for the comment about panic-stricken. I'll change it.)

KalimaReviewed Chapter: 1 on 9/27/2004
Ah yes, it's been a while since I've had time, but I must review, having read so much about them in "the group."

I think you have such a perfect grasp of young boys. Their activity level, their use of props, the noise they make, their language all strikes me as realistic. (I have a son.) When these realistic touches appear in a story, they make it real for me. I see the pond, the stream, the children, Glorfindel, and it's why I read fan fic. I love to keep living in the world of Middle Earth as much as RL allows.

Thank you, Jay. I'll read the next chapter now!




Author Reply: Late reviews, some time after I've finished a story, are actually very nice - it reminds me that people are still reading it.

I'm so glad you think the stories are realistic - although my own children are grown now, I teach in a primary school, so have a lot of contact with children of that age (although the twins are much nicer!)

LKKReviewed Chapter: 2 on 9/21/2004
*shocked* I can't believe I haven't reviewed the second chapter! I'm sorry, Jay.

The description of the dream battle between Glorfindel and the balrog was very evocative. No wonder the twins decided not to play balrog any more.

But ai! What a chilling end. Even when the twins said they were playing warrior, I didn't catch on. I gasped out loud at that last sentence. It was like a knife-stroke.

Good story, Jay.

Author Reply: It's actually rather nice to get a review some time after a story has been published, so please don't apologise! (I think, Oh! People are still reading this!) I loved writing this story; the twins have enough character to be interesting, but are still child-like.

I have to say, I'm delighted that that final sentence has had such an impact on everyone!

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