A/N: This applies to all four stories - some of it is gap filler/missing scenes and some may be a bit AU/stretching canon, but still completely plausible.  No slash, just lots of love and angst (the latter especially in Merry's story).  Have fun! :)

I have done many difficult things in my life. But none, dear cousins, dearest Sam, more difficult than leaving you. It breaks my heart that I am breaking yours.

But my heart is already broken. My soul is battered and bleeding, cut by too many shards. When they were being torn apart by the Ring, you sheltered them within your own hearts and souls and I can never thank you enough for that or tell you how grateful I am for all the love and comfort you have given me. I have never felt closer to anyone than you. I love you so much. We are truly kindred spirits, brothers.

But there are wounds in me that are too deep to heal here, darkness that cannot be dispelled though you three have always been my light and have guided me all your lives as well as could be out of the shadows that bound me more and more, first from my parents’ deaths and then from the Ring. I have been so blessed to have known you. I will carry your light and your love, your smiles and your laughter and a million other memories forever within me as I hope you will always remember the joy that was ours before the Shadow.

I have never wanted to hurt any of you. I beg you to forgive me that this time I have, that I didn’t tell you until now that I was leaving, that I gave you no time to prepare. Perhaps it was unfair and selfish of me not to tell you earlier, but I have loved listening to you laugh and joke these past few days on the way here. You were sad, of course, that Bilbo is leaving, but you thought he was the only one and that loss was easier to take than the ones you didn’t even imagine. I have closed my eyes and remembered what it used to be like to laugh like that. I marvel that you can still do it even after all you went through. I have cried too often in the past to laugh that easily myself anymore or to even laugh at all. I have so enjoyed holding your hands, one of you each day as we have traveled the long way to the Havens, and curling up next to you each night. I have loved kissing you all on the brow goodnight and telling you how much I loved you and hearing your sleepy replies. I have slept little these past few nights just so I could watch you sleep. I have smiled as I have brushed at your curls and just looked at you. And I have cried a little when I knew you wouldn’t see as I realized as each moment passed by how little time I had left with you, that these last days with you would have to last me for the rest of my life, so I hope you understand why I didn’t want them to be spent in tears. I couldn’t bear to have you grieve for a moment, let alone what you will now and I as well, leaving you in tears and barely able to keep from crying myself.

But this is not goodbye forever. It cannot be. I could not endure that the last time I saw you to be when I left you in tears or the last time I heard your voice, Sam, was when it was filled with grief.

Tears and grief I caused.

I remember you telling me, Pippin, what Gandalf said about the land beyond this life. It is there that I hope we meet again, where I can see you all smile and hear your joyous voices, where all pain and hurt have faded away and all is as it once was and I can hold you all forever. Perhaps if I am truly blessed, I will see you, Sam, even sooner. That hope is the only thing giving me the strength to leave at all.

Namarie, my beloved brothers.

Until we meet again...