Title: Cruel Caradhras
Author: Anso the Hobbit
Characters: The Fellowship
Timeline: Caradhras, SR 1419
Note: Not betaed. This is an old idea that has been lying about in my files, and I think it originally came from rabidsamfan. Also written for the 20_rings challenge.

Merry was cold, very cold. He had never thought he would be so cold that he would lose feeling in his hands and feet but he`d been that cold until Gandalf had managed to make a small fire. All the hobbits had been more or less unconscious by then and Merry dimly remembered Boromir digging him out of the snow and shaking him before handing him over to Gandalf to warm up in front of the little fire. At first he had tried to look after Frodo and Pippin but as he grew colder his mind shut down and he could all but concentrate on breathing. He had been cold beyond shivering for a long time now, but as he became increasingly warmer, Merry felt his head starting to hurt and he felt slightly sick and dizzy.

The four hobbits sat huddled together as close as they could. Pippin sat on Merry`s lap and Merry was leaning against Frodo, who again was leaning against Sam. None of them spoke much. Legolas, Aragorn and Boromir had gone to make a path in the snow drift for them and to see if it was possible to get down on this side of the mountain of if they had to head back.

Merry tried to get a better look at their surroundings but all he saw was white and shades of grey. The skies were low and it had started snowing again. Why was it so difficult to see? Merry rubbed his eyes, but it didn`t help.

“What are you doing?” Pippin asked.

Gandalf, who had been sitting in his own thoughts, turned his attention back to the hobbits. Frodo and Sam were quiet but Pippin and Merry was talking and Merry looked to be squinting. Merry had been unusually quiet during the day, Gandalf thought and a too quiet Merry meant no good..

“What fascinates you so, Merry?” Gandalf asked. “You`ve been staring at the same spot for a long time.”

“It`s nothing. I was just trying to see what is out there.”

“And do you see anything of interest?” Gandalf turned to look at the sky. Nothing had changed since the others left and they had been gone for some time now.

“No, that`s it. I can`t see anything. Everything is just grey and white.” Merry rubbed his eyes again then moved his hands to rub at his temples.

Gandalf watched him intently. Why was Merry rubbing his eyes and his head? Was he quiet because he wasn`t feeling well? Was it possible that he was blinded by the snow? Gandalf turned his gaze to Frodo. Both he and Sam were also watching Merry now. “Tell me, Merry, do you see those rocks over there?” Gandalf pointed to a bit of cliff sticking up over the snow.

Merry leaned forward and squinted again. “No. I don`t think so.”

Merry had everyone`s full attention now and Frodo looped an arm around his shoulder. “Merry? What`s wrong?”

“I don`t know Frodo. All of a sudden I can`t see right. My eyes hurt.” Merry rubbed at his eyes and temples again. When he took his hands away Gandalf was crouching down in front of them and hearing his voice so close, Merry jumped. He couldn`t see Gandalf properly. Everything was blurry. Was he going blind? Merry couldn`t comprehend how life would be with not being able to see, having people guide you wherever you went, walking with a stick perhaps to keep on his feet…

Gandalf lifted up his hand and held it in front of Merry`s face. “Can you see how many fingers I`m holding up?”

Merry tried to focus, then squinted and shook his head. “Three? No, four?”

“That is good.” Gandalf said, he had held up four fingers.

Seeing that his cousin barely could see, Pippin whimpered and squirmed in Merry`s lap, leaning in even closer.

“What is wrong with him?” Frodo asked, squeezing Merry`s shoulder and laying a kiss in his curls.

“I think he`s snowblind.” Sam said matter-of-fact.

“Yes, you are quite right, Sam.” Gandalf said. “Merry can`t see because his eyes have been exposed to the snow for too long without rest. Sometimes the light and the snow can be too much for one`s eyes and you become snow-blind.”

“How about you?” Merry said, turning to face Frodo. “Can you see?”

“Yes I see just fine Merry.”

“Pip?” Merry turned back.

“I can see too.” Pippin turned in Merry`s lap and hugged him before leaning back a little and looking into Merry`s eyes. “You can`t see me properly!” Merry`s eyes had not locked on Pippin`s.

“No I can`t. Sam?” Merry said with rising fear in his voice. “Gimli?”

“I see just fine too, Mr. Merry.”

“Aye.” Gimli said.

“Gandalf!” Merry was scared now. His head started pounding and he moaned involuntarily, feeling sick again.

“Do not let this trouble you too much. It will pass as soon.” Gandalf said, trying to soothe the distraught hobbit.

“Is there nothing to be done?” Frodo rubbed gently at Merry`s shoulder as he leaned against him. Merry`s moan had not escaped him.

“No, I`m afraid not. Try to keep your eyes closed. It will be better.”

Merry sighed and leaned heavily against Frodo, closing his eyes. It felt good to keep his eyes shut, but he was too cold and his head hurt too much to try to sleep.

A few moments passed before Frodo needed to move. Merry hadn`t moved and for a moment Frodo wondered if he had fallen asleep. “Merry?” He nudged a shoulder. “Can you move?”

Merry opened his eyes again and sat up a little. “Oh!” He reached out with a hand steadying himself against the wall.

“Merry? Are you not feeling well?” Frodo said, concerned. What little movement Merry had done should not be enough to make him dizzy.

“I`m a bit dizzy, is all.”

“Dizzy?” Gandalf asked, he had sat back after looking at Merry`s eyes but now he was sitting down in front of them again. “Pippin, sit down beside Merry, won`t you. I need to get a closer look at him.”

Pippin nodded and sat down beside Merry, taking his hand.

“How are you feeling?”

Merry thought for a moment before answering, trying despite the cold to assess his situation. “My head hurts, I`m dizzy as you saw and I feel a little nauseated.”

“Oh, Merry!” Pippin and Frodo said, both of them wriggling a little closer. “Why didn`t you say you were feeling poorly?” Frodo demanded.

Gandalf studied Merry. If it was possible to say with four cold and pale hobbits, Merry looked paler than the others and he had a light sheen of sweat on his face. Gandalf reached out to feel for fever but found none. “Am I guessing right that this came over you recently and that you didn`t feel ill before we started climbing?”

“Yes.”

Gandalf nodded, agreeing with himself.

“I say he`s suffering from a case of altitude sickness and that this too shall pass as we descend.” Gimli said, from where he had been sitting on Sam`s other side.

“Look!” Pippin said. He could see first one, then two other grey specks coming towards them. “They`re coming back.”

”Well,” cried Legolas as he ran up, `I have not brought the Sun. She is walking in the blue fields of the South, and a little wreath of snow on this Redhorn hillock troubles her not at all. But I have brought back a gleam of good hope for those who are doomed to go on feet. There is the greatest wind-drift of all just beyond the turn, and there our Strong Men were almost buried. They despaired, until I returned and told them that the drift was little wider than a wall. And on the other side the snow suddenly grows less, while further down it is no more than a white coverlet to cool a hobbit's toes.”*

As they prepared to go Gandalf took Aragorn aside and had a quiet word with him about Merry.

“Come Merry.” Aragorn said, gentle eyes looking the hobbit over. He`d be well again soon. “Climb up on my back and I shall carry you. Let`s follow Boromir`s example.” In front of them Boromir was carrying Pippin in the same manner and Merry could hear Pippin chat away about how marvellous it was that Boromir and Aragorn had managed to plough a way through the snow drift and even through the highest part of it all. At length, Aragorn sat Merry down beside Pippin and turned with Boromir to get the others. Legolas stayed with Merry and Pippin.

“Feeling any better?” Pippin asked as they waited.

“No, not much. But I trust to hope in what Gandalf said.”

Finally the rest of the Company – Boromir with Sam, Gandalf leading Bill with Gimli perched on top and lastly Aragorn carrying Frodo – reached them. As Frodo slid down of Aragorn`s back the mountain rumbled and snow and stones rained down behind them. The force of it all pressed them against the cliff and the spray of it half blinded them for a moment. At last the rumble stopped and they saw that the path was blocked behind them.

They all brushed off their clothes and soon everyone was ready to go and they walked and slid down the snowy side of the mountain, It was a dizzying trek and they were all hungry and chilled to the bone as they all they all stood once more on the flat shelf at the head of the steep slope where they had felt the first flakes of snow the night before.

With his feet firmly on the ground again Merry started to feel better and he let go of his hold on Boromir and Pippin.

The morning was now far advanced. From the high place they looked back westwards over the lower lands. Far away in the tumble of country that lay at the foot of the mountain was the dell from which they had started to climb the pass.

Frodo's legs ached. He was chilled to the bone and hungry; and his head was dizzy as he thought of the long and painful march downhill. Black specks swam before his eyes. He rubbed them, but the black specks remained. In the distance below him, but still high above the lower foothills, dark dots were circling in the air.

“The birds again!” said Aragorn, pointing down.

“That cannot be helped now,” said Gandalf. “Whether they are good or evil, or have nothing to do with us at all, we must go down at once. Not even on the knees of Caradhras will we wait for another night-fall!”

A cold wind flowed down behind them, as they turned their backs on the Redhorn Gate, and stumbled wearily down the slope. Caradhras had defeated them.

END

*From “the Fellowship of the Ring”, chapter three “the Ring Goes South”.