PART TEN: Getting worse

Author’s note: I usually write my stories book-verse, but in this chapter you will find a bit of movie-verse. Now, on with the story! We can`t leave the poor suffering hobbits waiting while you read nonsense from me, now can we?

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That night nothing and no one could budge Frodo from being the one to sit at Merry`s side. The fever had gone down after they had bathed him but Merry was still too hot for comfort. Daisy deemed her patient safe and stable for now and went to take some much-needed rest in one of the spare rooms. She was still rather worried about the lad, but young Master Frodo, whom she also had met before, seemed a capable sort and she was only in the next room, not a few miles on pony back away.

Frodo sat in the bedside chair and watched his cousin breathe. He had done this with Pippin several times over, and just like any well-trained healer he watched and listened intently for any changes in Merry`s state. Merry never stirred, but looked to be sleeping peacefully curled up on his side with his mouth slightly open and his glove-covered hands tucked under his cheek.

Pippin had been allowed to sit with them for a little after supper and evening tasks, but had soon fallen into an exhausted sleep and was carried off to bed. Paladin and Bilbo had retreated to the study after coming in to check on Merry and Eglantine spent some time with the lasses in the parlour. Before long everyone went to bed, and Frodo was the only one awake in the household. For a few hours Merry slept on, now and again shifting a little on the bed but never waking.

Suddenly and without warning Merry`s breathing changed. He was snoring lightly, apparently sleeping heavily, when his face scrunched up and his breath came in heaving gasps. He started to flail about, and for a moment Frodo was sure Merry was going to wake up. “Merry?” He rose and took both Merry`s hands in his, calming his movements. “Merry-lad? Can you hear me? Merry?” He released one of the hands and stroked his cousin’s curls in an attempt to soothe him. He was burning up! Quickly Frodo found a cloth and wet it. He washed Merry`s face while listening intently for any more of the irregular breathing. He had been told about the nightmares. Maybe Merry was dreaming again?

Suddenly, Merry`s eyes flew open but they didn`t fix on Frodo or anything else, his breath coming in rapid and shallow gasps. It was a wrench to leave his cousin`s side for even a moment, but Frodo opened the door to the hallway and ran to where Miss Daisy slept. After waking her he ran to Paladin and Eglantine`s room and roused them too. Dashing back to Merry`s room he arrived to find Merry still in the throes of his bad dream. His face had gone completely white in the short time Frodo was away and now he was crying out.

“Frodo! No… Run, Frodo! Run!” There was a hitch in Merry`s breath and then he called out for Pippin to run too. Merry sounded as if he was about to cry and he shouted out for Pippin to run faster.

Frodo looked at his cousin in astonishment and shock. Merry was clearly having another nightmare and Frodo rushed over to the bed and grasped his hand, Miss Daisy at his heels. He mustered his firmest and most comforting voice and spoke. “Merry. I`m here. I`m all right. Wake up, come back to us Merry dear.”

Merry gasped, he thrashed violently for a moment and then slumped and lay as if dead on the bed.

“No! Merry!” Frodo dashed the tears from his eyes, shaking his cousin. “Merry!”

Daisy yanked off the blankets and for a few minutes there was a frenzy of activity. She felt Merry`s pulse, looked into his eyes and checked him for fever. Tersely she ordered Frodo to sit him up and lean him forward. She then proceeded to listen to Merry`s breathing.

Sitting with Merry leaning into his arms, Frodo saw that the rest of the household was awake now too and were hovering anxiously in the doorway or by the foot of the bed. Paladin held a sobbing Pippin in his arms and did his best to soothe the distraught lad. Vinnie and Nell were crying too and Pearl was white as a sheet as they huddled together in the door. Eglantine came up behind Frodo and pressed a wet cloth to Merry`s face while stroking his curls with the other hand, murmuring soothing nonsense. Bilbo stood beside the lasses, trying to give them comfort as best as he could, patting Pearl on the shoulder and keeping a reassuring arm around the youngest lasses.

Frodo held Merry as still as he could while the healer and Eglantine fussed over him and tried to hold his own tears at bay. Merry had lost weight during his illness, Frodo`s brain noted, and he had grown a bit since Frodo had seen him last. He had almost reached his full growth now, surely Merry must be three foot three at the very least. Merry`s hair tickled Frodo`s nose and through the smell of sickness Frodo smelled the familiar scent that was his Merry. His heart lurched to think what would happen if he died. He didn`t think he could live past that.

*****

Pippin watched Miss Daisy work from the safety of his da’s arms. He had woken up when he heard running in the hallways and someone shouting. Instantly he knew that Merry was worse and ran from his room to be with his cousin. When he entered Merry`s room there reigned an ordered chaos. Frodo sat on Merry`s bed with Merry leaning up against him while Mama and the healer worked on helping Merry. Now Frodo looked at him with that wide-eyed blue gaze of his and Pippin saw that he too was frightened. There were tears in his eyes, and Pippin`s heart skipped a beat with the realisation of why Frodo was frightened. What if they lost Merry? What if Merry died? He had promised not to! Merry always kept his promises. Always. In all of the eight years of his life Pippin couldn`t remember a single time Merry had broken even the tiniest of promises, save for after he became so ill, and couldn’t go with Pippin out to the fields. And that hadn’t been his fault, he hadn’t broken the promise on purpose, it was postponed was all, because Merry was ill. But maybe Merry wouldn’t be able to keep his promise not to die, and that wouldn’t be his fault either.

Pippin felt very sad, so he did the only thing he could, he cried, great heaving sobs. He leaned into his father`s soothing and comforting embrace. He knew he shouldn`t lose hope and in his mind’s eye he saw Merry running towards him through a field of summer barley, his blue eyes sparkling and laughing like countless times before. It seemed to Pippin that Merry was somehow flying through the barley as he ran and at last he caught Pippin up in his arms, tickling and laughing, rubbing their noses together and plopping down between the rows with Pippin in his arms. This was his Merry. His cousin, protector, best friend and partner in mischief. Merry was his world and Pippin knew he couldn`t go on without him. Pippin raised his eyes to the bed again. Frodo was still holding Merry, now rubbing his back soothingly. Merry`s head lay on Frodo`s shoulder farthest from Pippin, and from this angle Pippin couldn`t see Merry`s face. Frodo looked pale, but he had stopped crying.

Paladin put Pippin down and he padded over to the bed, taking Merry`s hot hand between his own. Merry was still limp in Frodo`s lap and hadn’t stirred for several minutes. The grown ups were talking quietly behind him and suddenly Eglantine took Pippin’s hand, gathered up the lasses, and lead them away to the kitchen for a snack and to try to calm them down. “Come children. They`re going to cool him down again. Merry will be all right soon. The fever spiked and he had a nightmare. He will be well, soon. He will.” She bent down to earnestly look her youngest in the face, and after a moment Pippin wearily nodded. Eglantine gave him an encouraging hug. This was a sore trial for all of them but worst of all for Pippin. Was it only a few days ago that she had scolded Merry for having rumpled clothes and hay in his hair when he sat down to supper and shooed him and Pippin off to wash before they even thought about sitting down to eat? She would welcome a bit of hay, and muddy floors, if only Merry would get well.

*****

Some time later Paladin, Frodo and Miss Daisy came back from the bathing room, Merry carried in Paladin`s arms. Pippin was looking out for them from the kitchen and followed after them into Merry`s room. Bilbo was changing the sheets again and Paladin sat down in the chair with Merry still in his lap. Pippin tiptoed over and gently touched his cousin’s face and took his hand in his. He was lost for words, but his heart reached out and somehow sensing Pippin`s presence Merry stirred a little and opened his eyes for the barest of moments before falling back to sleep.

*****

Merry was dreaming. He was in a large and unfamiliar forest together with Frodo and Pippin. They were fleeing from hideous creatures that he knew to be orcs only because of Bilbo`s stories. The orcs were shouting to each other to find the Halflings, but Merry didn`t understand. What did the creatures want with them? Merry knew Men called hobbits Halflings – Bilbo had said so, so there was no doubt it was he and his cousins the creatures hunted. Pippin pulled him into a hiding place beneath a bush and suddenly Merry saw Frodo all alone and cowering behind a tree with the orcs running everywhere, searching for them. Frodo met his eyes and with a horrible sense of foreboding Merry knew that he had to let Frodo go on alone, burdened with some perilous task and that he couldn`t help him any more. He had to let Frodo go and his heart ached with the thought of it. He knew they had to distract the orcs so that they wouldn`t find Frodo. He grabbed Pippin`s hand and with a look made him understand that they had to do this, all the while choking on the thought that he was sacrificing one dear cousin to save another. It was an almost impossible choice to make, but it was the right one; Merry knew it, and somehow he understood that Pippin knew it as well. They dashed out into the open, shouting, and were seized by huge and cruel hands and struck and thrown about. Merry had one desperate glimpse of Pippin being battered by the foul creatures, and then all went black and he knew no more.

Then, after what seemed to be quite a long time, lost in the dark, he felt himself spiralling toward wakefulness, yet he couldn’t quite manage it. Hands, several pairs of them, moved him about and he felt cold but soothing water surrounding his body before he was carried in someone`s strong arms. He finally managed to open his eyes and saw Pippin, looking frightened. Merry wanted to reach out and comfort him, but sleep dragged him down again and the last thing he was aware of was being laid down on a bed, a wonderfully soft pillow beneath his cheek and snug blankets tucked lovingly in about him.