19. Tying a Knot

The next day, Reginard did not appear as usual immediately after the Thain finished second breakfast.

'Do you want me to go and look for him, love?' Diamond said, brushing his forehead with her lips as she rose.

'No, I'm sure he has more important things to do than dance attendance on the Thain. What, I cannot imagine. But they'd have to be very important.'

'Very,' Diamond said. 'I'll see you for elevenses. My admiring subjects await me,' as the cries of two hungry babes wafted through the Thain's private apartments.

Pippin seized her hand and kissed it before releasing her. 'My queen,' he said.

'Ho, varlet, I shall greet thee anonce,' she answered.

'What does that mean, exactly?'

'I'm not sure but it trips marvelously from the tongue,' she said, and was rewarded with his laughter.

Ferdibrand breezed in. 'Good morning, cousin!' he said cheerily.

'It might be,' Pippin answered cautiously. 'Where's Regi?'

'O, he said to start without him. He thinks you take him for granted,' Ferdi said.

Pippin snorted indignantly. 'Of course I take him for granted! And I intend to keep on doing so!'

'Well, you'll have to take him for granted at a distance for a bit this morning; he had some details to check on,' Ferdibrand answered. 'Will I do?'

'Indeed you won't do,' the Thain snapped. 'That's why he's steward and you're only chancellor!'

'Ah, but I'm working my way up,' Ferdi said. 'I'm to be his steward when he steps up to be Thain, you know.'

'I had suspected as much.'

Ferdibrand took Pippin's arm and helped him upright. 'See, we don't need a steward. We can run the Shire just fine between ourselves.' He positioned his shoulder under Pippin's armpit. 'Convenient, your being so tall,' he muttered. They managed the few steps to the door, but it was harder work than the Thain was used to. 'You're getting better, but you really do need a prop on the other side,' Ferdibrand said.

'O you noticed that,' the Thain muttered, thinking of the long haul to his study.

'Perhaps this'll do,' Ferdi said, reaching behind the door to bring out an ornately carved walking stick. Pippin nearly lost his balance as his cousin thrust the head of the stick into his hand; he automatically shoved the stick under him and caught his weight upon it.

'That's better,' he murmured. 'What is this?'

'O a little something Regi and I cooked up,' Ferdibrand said casually.

'A walking stick?' They began the shuffling progress towards the study, a little more slowly than usual, but it was forward progress, at least.

'Not just a walking stick, cousin.'

'O?' Pippin asked mildly.

'No, since troubles seem to follow you like gnats we thought you could use an all-purpose Trouble Stick.'

'Tell me what you do with a trouble stick, besides leaning upon it,' the Thain encouraged.

'Well, it'll float, being carved from wood, so if you get thrown into a flood it'll bear you up until you can reach shore...'

'I can see where that might come in handy.'

'You can fend off the roof of a burning building as it comes down on you.'

'Yes?'

'If a pony tries to run away, just give him a good clobber between the ears, that'll drop him in his tracks.'

'Ah.'

'And if you're caught on a mountainside in a blizzard you can burn it for warmth; it'll also make a fine torch if you get stuck in a cave-in without a light.'

'You seem to have thought of everything.'

'O aye,' Ferdibrand nodded. 'Plus the waylaying orcs and ruffians, now, just threaten them with the Stick...'

'And they'll be so overcome with laughter I shall be able to make my hobbling escape,' the Thain nodded.

'You can pry up a fallen coach with it, 'tis that sturdy,' Ferdibrand continued.

'But is it any good at fending off a wife with a tray of food?'

Ferdi shook his head. 'Nay, I do not think it would work for that.'

The Thain sighed. 'Pity,' he said. 'I thought it was just about perfect up until now.'

Their shuffling progress had come to a stop and he stood breathing hard, head drooping. Reginard quietly came up behind them, slipping his head beneath the Thain's arm, straightening to take his weight. The stick hung from its leather loop about Pippin's wrist, unneeded at the moment, but ready to take his weight again at need.

'That's a bit of progress,' the tardy steward said. 'By next year you'll be walking with just the stick.'

'By next year...' Pippin said softly. 'I don't have a year, cousin. The pony races are days away.' He sighed. 'I seem to be running out of rope.'

'Then tie a knot, and hang on tight to the end,' Regi said.

The Thain looked at him wearily. 'You're late,' he said. 'I ought to fire you.'

The steward chuckled. 'You won't get rid of me quite that easily, Thain.'

'O no?'

'No. I'm like one of those pesty burrs that clings to your cloak; you can't shake me off, you cannot brush me away, and when you try to pluck me out I'll sting your fingers but good.'

Pippin sighed. 'Looks as if I'm stuck with you, then.'

'It does look that way,' Regi said agreeably.