I decided to summarize selected chapters of the Fellowship of the Ring in the style of one of my favorite poets, Ogden Nash, of "Shake, shake, shake the bottle, None'll come and then a lot'll" fame, his wonderful tribute to ketchup. Done for the hobbit_ficathon challenge to depict an incident from the books in the style of another writer.

A LONG EXPECTED PARTY

Farewell speeches are fine.
Just leave the wine.

THE OLD FOREST

It’s not wise to make a pillow
Out of Old Man Willow.

AT THE SIGN OF THE PRANCING PONY

If you want folks to think you’re stable,
Do not dance upon the table.
And if you would avoid a frown,
Don’t vanish when you hit the ground.

THE COUNCIL OF ELROND

Some folks think this chapter’s boring,
Because there is no fighting or magic or sex ( of which there is none to be spoken of anywhere else in the book, either, so that’s beside the point) and so it leaves them snoring.
But when you consider that it covers four thousand eight hundred and fifty nine and three quarters years of history,
That it’s not even more boring is a mystery.

THE RING GOES SOUTH

Journeys can be very uncomfortable and depressing when having to walk the whole way there, and one thing can be told:
Climbing mountains is cold.
And gets one no closer to the destination;
Why bother? There’s no explanation.

LOTHLORIEN

Perch with Elves among the trees,
Feeling every wayward breeze.
Take your time, no need to run.
Time flies when you’re having fun.

THE BREAKING OF THE FELLOWSHIP

Carrying around a Ring of power can be very depressing,
Especially when with your friend’s mind it is messing.
Go on the lam.
But don’t forget Sam.

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For authentic Ogden Nash, check out
http://www.westegg.com/nash/