Beyond The Dimrill Gate by Jay of Lasgalen
Agape4Gondor · 16 May 2008 · Chapter 11: The Bridge Of Khazad-Dum
OH MY GOODNESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSs GRACIOUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS How could you do this? Why did I start reading this??? YIKES and YIKES again... *takes deep breaths* Ok - I'm ok - will wait patiently............ *shudders*
Author's reply
:>) I do like to get reactions like this - I feel my writing is working! Be patient - I'm writing the next chapter right now.
Agape4Gondor · 16 May 2008 · Chapter 10: Water, Water, Everywhere.
Whoooo hooo ! That had to be a sight - glad our crew didn't get caught up in the waters and carried away - of course, the Dwarves would have planned that they wouldn't...
Author's reply
The dwarves knew *exactly* what they were doing, down to the last detail. It was fun to show rheir skill with stone :>)
Agape4Gondor · 16 May 2008 · Chapter 9: Search And Rescue
Oh my goodness! The chapter couldn't have been better! Really, Jay! The ending was perfect.... Don't second guess yourself on this one... very good indeed! Satisfying even.
Agape4Gondor · 16 May 2008 · Chapter 8: In The Deep Places Of The World
Wow - this was an incredibly tense chapter... I could feel Estel's fear - very good writing - very good indeed! Am I surprised!!!!!
Agape4Gondor · 16 May 2008 · Chapter 7: Unexpected Company
Great chapter!!! It was such fun to see the Dwarves - and the little dig that Elladan was able to give! And a dragon - that does make sense, though we all know it's not...
Agape4Gondor · 16 May 2008 · Chapter 5: Time Runs Out
Another Yikes! I shouldn't be surprised I suppose... but at least these yikes are because the tale is well-written and not redundant... Nice job!
Agape4Gondor · 16 May 2008 · Chapter 4: Reunion
LOL at A/N - it is indeed difficult with a large body count - but the explanation seems quite plausible! Good chapter.
Agape4Gondor · 16 May 2008 · Chapter 3: Disaster Strikes
Okay - another yikes! This is going to be a very taut story - one I should not have started right before bedtime!!!!
Agape4Gondor · 16 May 2008 · Chapter 2: A Journey In The Dark
Phew! Yikes and a few other things! I think they should have tied Estel to them!!!!
Agape4Gondor · 16 May 2008 · Chapter 1: An Unseen Menace
Two things that I had to giggle about in the middle of the tension - the 'real' owl and poor Orophin's admonition to keep safe! Great first chapter and I loved that you had the sun rising just as they were descending ito the mines....
daw the minstrel · 16 May 2008 · Chapter 11: The Bridge Of Khazad-Dum
I liked the comparison of Arwen and Farin! That made me laugh. Female logic I guess. As I got to the end, I saw why you said there were two bridges. Not any more, apparently.
Author's reply
I'm trying very hard to keep to canon here, using what the Fellowship saw in Moria and what they knew about it. The bridge of Khazad Dum was a defence mechanism, but I needed there to be another one for Elladan etc to cross (and that I could destroy!) The similarity between Arwen and Bilbur is partly female logic, and partly a brother/sister teasing that Elrohir recognises. It was quite a late addition in the editing process!
Elflingimp · 16 May 2008 · Chapter 11: The Bridge Of Khazad-Dum
Aww!!!!!!!! Arg!!!I could see it all in my mind! How could you leave it there? cruel cliffmaster!!!! Well let me get my breathing under control here,(LOL) I guess I'll be okay but Elledan where are you? Well just hurry up and update or I'll have to report you to the readers abuse association!(Just kidding) Hugs The Imp P.S. That was really a good chapter.
Author's reply
I'm really glad you felt you could see this so clearly. Poor Elladan - you'll have to wait and see what's happened, but I confess I love cliffhangers! Thanks for the review - i'm glad you enjoyed this.
BlueEyedElf · 6 May 2008 · Chapter 10: Water, Water, Everywhere.
I seem to have been forgetting to review lately, so I will make this review for the last few chapters. First of all, the idea of Bilbur being a woman is just hilarious. I loved Dan, Ro and Estel's shock at the confession. I love the plan of unleashing the river. I can only imagine the orc's surprise as they were washed away. Very clever. I have really enjoyed Estel in this. He has done lots of growing up over the course of this story. It is nice to see the twins respect the fact that he is maturing. They are sure going to have some interesting stories to tell Ada when they get home. I have been enjoying this take on Estel's great deeds. I will be watching for the next chapter.
Author's reply
Thank you for reviewing when it's been so long since I updated! I'm glad you enjoyed the revelation about Bilbur. I've enjoyed writing the interaction of the dwarves with E3 - as they work together they use each other's skills to defeat the orcs. It's been fun to use that quote about Estel and explore it, showing his greater maturity and responsibility while his brothers still worry about him. Thank you for the review!
erunyauve · 6 May 2008 · Chapter 10: Water, Water, Everywhere.
What a treat, to see a new chapter! >>"He doesn't like having his prejudices challenged," Estel whispered very quietly. "Of course not," Elladan agreed, watching as Náin poured another cup of the tea and took it to Elrohir. "Who does? But at least he has the courage to admit he could be wrong. I can think of several elves who could not do that." Again, this is such a wonderful gap-filler - everything knits so well into LOTR.
Author's reply
Thank you - I'm just relieved that the new chapter seems to fit fairly seamlessly with the rest of the story - I thank my beta for that! Thank you for highlighting a particular section you liked - it means a lot to me. Jay
meckinock · 3 May 2008 · Chapter 6: Physician, Heal Thyself
That was a great scene on the rock face, with the orcs shooting arrows at them. I could almost feel the shards of stone stinging Elrohir's cheek. I was also thinking of you rapelling down the side of your church. And for next year's event, Jay will rappell down the side of the church whilst dodging arrows! Elrohir's exhaustion and determination really came through here, as did Estel's growing into a protective role he's never had to assume before. Great chapter.
Author's reply
Rapelling down the side of the church whilst dodging arrows? Don't give anyone ideas! We had an archery demonstration at the last summer fete ... 'Elrohir's exhaustion and determination really came through here, as did Estel's growing into a protective role he's never had to assume before.' I really liked showing the role-reversal here - before, it's always been his brothers who have cared for Estel. It's the first time he's been in the position of having to help them.
meckinock · 3 May 2008 · Chapter 5: Time Runs Out
I just love In Charge Elladan. You just can't help but feel everything is going to be all right once he shows up and takes over and starts ordering everyone around. Although I can't even begin to imagine how they're going to climb out of there with Elrohir having a broken leg. And Estel can't climb like Spiderman, either. And now, more orcs! Yay.
Author's reply
In Charge Elladan. It's a lovely image, isn't it? Although Elrohir's my favourite twin, I just love Elladan here!
meckinock · 3 May 2008 · Chapter 4: Reunion
Boy, those Lorien cloaks sure come in handy in a pinch - never mind :-) Well, Estel was ready anyhow, at least. I was so relieved at the end of the chapter to see that Elladan had managed to find them. Nothing worse than being in a cave full of orcs and worse things than being in a cave full of orcs and worse things and being split up. Elrohir's broken leg is going to make it a lot harder for them to get out now. Which I hope they plan to do, and leave the scouting for another time!
Author's reply
*Grin* Well, the Lorien cloak would have worked - and worked a little too well. The orc would never have seen Elrohir if it hadn't stepped on him! Despite their dire situation and Elrohir's injuries, they're all much better off now they're together again. They're going to quit while they're ahead!
nessa · 2 May 2008 · Chapter 10: Water, Water, Everywhere.
Yes, we are still all here and dancing for joy that you have joined us again. Its a delight to see the barriers falling between the dwarves and the three Elrondians. I'm afraid they are going to find something worse than a dragon down there. Keep that muse happy, alright?
Author's reply
I'm just so sorry it's taken me so long! Shared adversity and working together to overcome it has broken down the barriers between E3 and the dwarves as they learn each has something to give - but they never will find anything worse than the 'dragon'. I have to keep reminding myself that no-one knew about the Balrog!
Elena Tiriel · 30 April 2008 · Chapter 10: Water, Water, Everywhere.
Heights??? Heights??? *Barbara squeaks, then gulps, hard* By the way, thought you'd appreciate this passage that I dug up for the bios of E&E that I'm going to update in the HASA Research Library.... er, someday.... "And when [Aragorn] was still but a youth, yet strong withal, he went abroad with Elladan and Elrohir and learned much of hunting and of war, and many secrets of the wild." The Peoples of Middle-earth, HoME Vol 12, Part 1, Ch 9, The Making of Appendix A: The Tale of Aragorn and Arwen
Author's reply
I love that quote! I must have missed it before, but it still links with the 'great deeds'. I haven't actually *read* HoME much, but it's a wonderful research source to dip into for background material. Heights? Think canon, and the escape from Moria. And falling ...
Tithenaru · 30 April 2008 · Chapter 10: Water, Water, Everywhere.
Great to see this update; gave me an excuse to re-read the other chapters - double HOORAY! I always enjoy your fiction, and this three brothers tale is no exception. "Estel flushed a little, the colour vivid on his pale face. “It would not have been the first tall story you told me, though!” he retorted under his breath." Isn't that the truth .... poor Estel. Can't wait for the next chapter. Tithenaru
Author's reply
I'm glad you enjoyed reading (and re-reading) this story. After such a long pause I'm not surprised you had to go back over it! There were points I'd forgotten and had to check on myself. Poor Estel - but he's growing up so fast here under the twins' guidance; and he's even surprising them. I'm well on the way with the next chapter now that the muse has finally returned!
pipinheart · 29 April 2008 · Chapter 10: Water, Water, Everywhere.
Very nice... I didn't want this one to end... I like how the drawves and the Ellandan, Elrohir and Estel are working together, it's not often you see that. I thought it amusing that the drawves tea was so terrible. Finally Elladan is trusting Estel to go scouting ahead on his own, he has proven his worth to him. Flooding the orcs and dragon, serves them right. Love it...Great job...
Author's reply
I haven't written about dwarves very much before, so I'm glad you like them working with E3. Even Nain has mellowed since they saved Bilbur! Tolkien tells us that Estel perfomed 'great deeds' at this time, and goes off into the wild on his own soon after this. Elladan has to begin to trust Estel's judgement now.
Elena Tiriel · 29 April 2008 · Chapter 10: Water, Water, Everywhere.
Hi Jay! Congratulations on the muse returning! I soooo empathize with having an obstinately dormant muse! *Barbara glares at Glorfindel, her muse, who is indolently lounging on her sofa, quaffing expensive Dorwinion, wadding up sheets of scratch paper with Barbara's numerous in-progress but stalled drabbles, throwing them at the wastepaper basket across the room, perfectly dunking each shot..... Dratted, lazy Elf!* I'm not sure I've ever commented on this story before, but if not, I understand why now: in order to refresh my memory, I went back a few chepters, to the one where the dwarf got stuck underwater................. Erm, did I ever mention that I am claustrophobic? Very, very claustrophobic............... My heart is finally beginning to return to a normal rate, but I have a feeling I won't sleep well tonight. And it's all your fault! *glares* Anyway, this last chapter has some very interesting developments... the rather neatly-fitting theory about what is causing the evil feeling and the heat.... and the very clever use of Dwarven skills to divert the river into the den of iniquity.... Nicely done! - Barbara, trying to dry off her sweaty palms....
Author's reply
Claustrophobic? This isn't the best story for you, then! I hope it doesn't give you nightmares. They will be moving up to the wider, more open halls in the next chapter though, so no more dark, cramped tunnels (but what are you like with heights?) The dragon theory fits what they're seeing, but of course we know it's wrong. They had to have something to go back and report though, or they would keep on searching. Here's hoping the muse doesn't depart again - there's not far to go now!
Elflingimp · 29 April 2008 · Chapter 10: Water, Water, Everywhere.
That was excellent!!! ,I will be waiting for the next chapter, hopefully soon? The Imp
Author's reply
The muse has returned with a vengeance, and the next chapter is already half-written. I'm just so glad that people are still reading!
daw the minstrel · 29 April 2008 · Chapter 10: Water, Water, Everywhere.
How clever of the dwarves! And you set it up nicely too, just as you're setting up the things the Fellowship finds in Moria in a few decades. I'm glad you're going on this again, Jay.
Author's reply
'I'm glad you're going on this again, Jay.' So am I! I never gave up on this, but I began to despair that anyone else would still be reading. It's the worst writer's block I've ever had, even though I knew (roughly) where we were heading.
Kitty · 29 April 2008 · Chapter 10: Water, Water, Everywhere.
Elladan's rescue action has turned the world (or believs) of the dwarvs firmly on their head, I fear. An elf risking so much to save a dwarf - unheard of *grin* Oh, if Estel knew he'd have to face the 'dragon' one day ... so many years later he was certainly not that eager to go there in the first place. Ah, that was indeed the perfect diversion! And hopefully a few (okay, not so few) orcs have drowned when the river flooded their cave. Good riddance! Jay, I am so glad your muses finally returned and allowed you to continue this story! I hope they (and you) keep that good work up ;-)
Author's reply
I'm delighted to announce that the muse has finally returned! I never gave up on this story, but I can't blame anyone who did :( It's been fun to balance what they *think* they've found against what's really down there, and what will be discovered in later years.