News Resources
Login
Become a member
Help
Search
|
|
| About Us News Resources
Login
Become a member
Help
Search
|
|
|
| Natural Children by French Pony | 48 Review(s) |
|---|---|
| meckinock | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 2/12/2007 |
| Wow. Scariness in the river. I don't know which was worse - Elrond's terror at being swept away or Elros's terror at seeing him stranded in the floodwaters. And poor Elrond; he wants to be rescued but he doesn't want to have to touch Maedhros's stump. I really felt sorry for Elros being assigned to write a composition after all that! I was very relieved when Maedhros let him off the hook. The final scene was very touching, with poor Elros trying to get comfortable in bed all alone. He has a lot to think about. Have his feelings really changed or not? | |
| Elena Tiriel | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 2/12/2007 |
| An interesting tale, French Pony, and also an intriguing take on how Maglor (and Maedhros) might have related to Elros and Elrond. Nicely done! - Barbara | |
| Nilmandra | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 2/12/2007 |
| A nice reconciliation at the end here, to bring this small group back together. I couldn't help but wonder, though, if Maglor and Maedhros would ever apologize to the twins for what they did at Sirion, in destroying their home and people and taking them captive? Maglor grew to love them, but it is hard to get past the fact that it is his and Maedhros's fault that they are orphans. It would be an interesting look in later years to see if the twins would see the one-sidedness of this apology/forgiveness and be brave enough to broach the topic. | |
| MithLuin | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 2/12/2007 |
I agree with you that it is a very complicated situation. I wonder how much the twins knew, as children, and when they learned various details. I am actually working on my own fic detailing their lives after the Havens, so I guess if I ever finish it, you will see what I think of all this! But I like your version of events, where the trust is broken before it can form, and that fracture makes it very, very weak. And yet...Maglor is open enough about it that they cannot feel betrayed. Interesting. Your story does have a 'love conquers all' feel to it, and I would like to think that, ultimately, the relationship did last. Someone else pointed out that Elrond refers to Eãrendil as his "sire," not his father, so perhaps even at the time of LotR, he considers Maglor to be his father. | |
| Jay of Lasgalen | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 2/12/2007 |
| I've really enjoyed this story. Bravo for Elros confronting his feelings, acknowledging his shame and remorse, and finally finding his love for Maglor again. I also liked Maglor and Maedhros confronting their own actions and the consequences of That Oath. The story Jasta referred to is by Katherine Kurtz, one of her Deryni Chronicles (I can't remember the particular title.) One of her central characters Rhys (a hero of mine since I first read him), was killed in a senseless accident that seemed to sum up the pointlessness of battle and war. It's years since I read it, but I immediately recognised the scene - it was that powerful! Jay | |
| daw the minstrel | Reviewed Chapter: 5 on 2/12/2007 |
| The most interesting part of this chapter was Maglor, wrestling with the truth of his own actions. He seems to me to be struggling for understanding almost as much as Elros was and he has no kind parent to help him. This was a good read, FP. | |
| ponypetter | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 2/11/2007 |
| I just found this beautiful story. I think the most striking scene featured Elros telling Maglor and Maedhros that their oath and quest was stupid. Maglor seems to agree in his heart, which probably has a lot to do with his adoption of the twins. His loyalty to the rest of his family is difficult to shake especially now that so many have died, but I get the feeling he is finding it increasingly difficult to accept his role in the deaths of his adopted son's family. | |
| Bodkin | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 2/8/2007 |
| Thank goodness Elrond is rescued! Elros is learning more about his guardians than perhaps he realises - their deep love for each other, for one thing. And that they are suffering from the events of the past age or so. And, perhaps, that working together will achieve what a solo effort won't. But Maedhros can still be rather scary. (Protective of his younger brother, perhaps. Even at the expense of children.) | |
| Jay of Lasgalen | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 2/6/2007 |
| (Sorry - this is more a comment to Jasta about her review) 'A friend of mine killed off a VERY popular character of hers in a series of novels--he needed to NOT be there for future events--but rather than succumb to the temptation to kill him off in some special or meaningful way, with perhaps a lovely protracted death scene... he slipped in blood during a brutal massed fight, struck his head on the edge of a stone stair, and... died. Wham. A brilliant moment that had her fans screaming in outraged admiration... *g* I know the scene you mean - and I hated it. It was so senseless, and such a waste of a wonderful life - and exactly what happens in battles and a time of war. So much that is good is lost in just such pointless circumstances. | |
| JastaElf | Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 2/6/2007 |
| Superb chapter! A lot of emotions... a lot of pain and terror. I can feel SO much for Elrond here... I have a deep and abiding terror of drowning (yet am drawn to water, the rougher the better... go figure....) and I know I would not have been able to let go of the rock either. One thing that struck me so powerfully (among the many!) was the fact that Elrond was in the act of moving away from the dangerous river--sensible child!--when he was taken away by an act of nature. This is never an easy thing for a writer to convey; we always want to make it something more than it is, but accidents sometimes just happen. A friend of mine killed off a VERY popular character of hers in a series of novels--he needed to NOT be there for future events--but rather than succumb to the temptation to kill him off in some special or meaningful way, with perhaps a lovely protracted death scene... he slipped in blood during a brutal massed fight, struck his head on the edge of a stone stair, and... died. Wham. A brilliant moment that had her fans screaming in outraged admiration... *g* I thought of that when I re-read Elrond falling into the river. He didn't fall because he was out of control with grief and upset--though there was every reason for that to be the case. He didn't fall because someone pushed him, or was trying to rid the world of him... he just... fell. The riverbank let go and he fell. JUST brilliantly simple, and perfect! Elros's actions throughout are also perfect. He is acting very much his age, and very much the characterization you have created for him--and it's wonderful to see. I love the fact that he actually noticed--and understatedly reacted to--the fact that Maedhros brought him unmatched stockings and Elrond's trousers. Grief and anxiety are like that... we catch ourselves winkling at trivialities, and often bash ourselves for doing so, and yet... do it anyway. It shows so clearly and simply and brilliantly the way a mind and spirit behaves when dulled by fear... so very well done. I love that you show, by people's actions and words, what state they're in--rather than telling, you show. And you do so VERY well. The end bit, with Elros realizing that Maglor is weeping and that he, Elros, is probably the cause of it... is just stunning. In fact the entire part from when they rescue Elrond reminds me of a song I heard a few times on the radio as a child, and have not been able to find since. It is called "November Snow" and is apparently about someone looking back on the death of a brother many years later. Like your story it is elegantly simple and yet so complex: "November snow, stretching far away/on a Kansas City morning, people talking low;/but the doctor shook his head/and left the rest unsaid..." and later, the line that has haunted me ever since: "And we always will be brothers/though there always will be others/to call my name..." The whole second half of this chapter leaves me in the same contemplative state of mind, observing a grief and an anxiety from outside, wanting to comfort but not able to because I am not truly there... but strongly marked by what I am observing. *Stands and applauds* Just SUCH a wonderful chapter, in a superb, beautifully crafted story! Thank you for this update! | |