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Consequences of a Fall  by Dreamflower 13 Review(s)
Indigo BuntingReviewed Chapter: 4 on 7/13/2006
Hmm. Pippin's not going to fall off the roof, is he? That wouldn't be good.

I like Pippin's discomfort in his dress clothes. All kids are like that, aren't they? Especially little boys! I also enjoyed Pippin's thoughts at the internment (not that they brought me pleasure; rather, they were well done). It would be quite natural for a child to go to a funeral and think about what it would be like to lose a member of his own family. And Pippin's desire to comfort Frodo - and not doing so because it wouldn't be 'proper' just then - is very sweet. I'll say it again - awwww!

Author Reply: Well, you know by now what happened!

Dress clothes, for some reason, don't seem meant to be comfortable. We females seem to have little better success coping with that reality than males do, LOL!

As I said, Pippin is very sensitive and perceptive for his age. I do think he's a sweet child.

Queen GaladrielReviewed Chapter: 4 on 3/29/2006
 Ugh, ugh, ugh!!! I can't *stand* that Hyacinth's daughters right now! I can't believe I'm saying that, for of course I know they turned out well in the
end, but...ugh! Amathyst did deserve it, and it's hard on all three cousins for him to be punished in such a way. Poor little Pip! And you have a way of
describing that melancholy that will creep over Frodo that makes my heart lurch, and for a minute I was almost angry with Saradoc. Oh, and you do the POV
of a child wonderfully! I really can't wait for the next one!
God bless,

Author Reply: Yes, Hyacinth's daughters are pretty bratty right now--fortunately for them it was not too late when they got out from under her influence.

It's a sad but true thing for the cousins that the most effective punishment for one can't help but be a punishment for the others, even though it's not meant to be; poor Saradoc knows, but he really hasn't much choice. He'd jump at an excuse to let Merry off, if he can.

I'm glad you think little Pippin's POV rings true. He's a thoughtful and observant child.

Jeodo BrandybuckReviewed Chapter: 4 on 3/28/2006
Dear Miss Dreamflower,

Any chance of posting "A New Reckoning" to Stories of Arda? I haven't had any luck at all any time I've tried to connect with the Pippin Healers Group. (Yahoo and I just can't seem to make things work...) Also, please tell the lovely Miss Lindalea that we're all waiting with baited breath for the next installment. (And our thanks for such a lovely beta-job, too!)

Thanks again for a wonderful read!

Jeodo Brandybuck

Author Reply: "A New Reckoning" *is* on Stories of Arda already. You can find it on my author page. The only one that is *not* is this one, LOL!

But I do understand the yahoo problems--I've had them in the past, myself.

Lin's working away, and Chapter 5 will be up very soon!

And I am very glad you are enjoying the story!

Grey WondererReviewed Chapter: 4 on 3/27/2006
I do find Hyacinth's part of this tale very interesting. I like looking at this through her view as she goes on with what is now, thanks to her behavior, her life.

Author Reply: Yes, the little "flashforwards" (opposite of flashbacks--aren't I brilliant, LOL?) let the reader know that at some point in time Hyacinth finally gets what's coming to her, even though it doesn't quite happen yet. I really felt it was necessary to do it that way, as I didn't want an angry mob descending on me with pitchforks saying "Why didn't she get punished?"

PIppinfan1988Reviewed Chapter: 4 on 3/26/2006
"...and if Reggie had not been there during that little display, Hyacinth would have slapped some sense into the child."

If Hiacynth was there and did just that, then Saradoc would have witnessed her nasty deed. I wonder what his reaction would have been then? Maybe Hiacynth ought to slap some sense into herself. ;-)

You really have written Hiacynth's character extrememly well! She is one hobbit I'd like to meet in a dark tunnel at Great Smials someday in the fictitious future. In fact, I have often thought to name one of my minor O.C. lasses "Cynthia"--a derivative of Hiacynth, but I can't bring myself to do it, lol. Maybe if one of my lass-characters is less than a lady, then perhaps I'll revisit that name. ;-)

Little Pippin playing atop the Smials is soooo cuuute! He in his wee breeches with the buttons at the knee, little jacket and weskit... Can I have him? I can't promise I'll give him back, so you may want to think hard on it. :-) Poor little lobster...wait 'til he wakes up. :-O

p.s. Sorry about the late review--I finally finished my challenge tale this morning and thought I'd reward myself. :-)

Author Reply: Hyacinth needs a slapping herself, but it's highly unlikely that it will ever happen.

LOL! Don't let *my* Hyacinth put you off a perfectly good hobbit name! After all there are only so many flowers you can use.

*giggle* Yes, wee!Pip is cute, all dressed up, and he's cute running around in the grass with no shirt, face it, he's cute whatever he does! (Poor little lobster? Bring on the garlic butter!)

Not all that late--I'm late responding too! It's hard using the DH's laptop. OOh--I am *so* looking forward to the next challenge!

BodkinReviewed Chapter: 4 on 3/24/2006
Thirsty. Sun. Half-nekkid. Sunstroke calls. Not what they need at the moment - although I suppose Pearl can lose herself in looking after her little brother.

Horrible Hyacinth might rub her hands together with glee, too, at the prospect of Pippin popping his clogs.

I loved Pippin's thoughts about his mother and how the Thain didn't seem too sorry to be burying his. Not, of course, that anyone who knew Lalia would blame him for wanting to fill that grave in quickly.

Author Reply: I've pretty much telegraphed the next part, haven't I?

And most certainly you have Hyacinth pegged.

Yes, Pippin could tell that the Thain wasn't too sorry; but he most certainly knew how *he* would feel in such a situation. It's that sort of empathy and ability to put himself in someone's place that makes Pippin so very likable.

And no, Lalia will not be mourned very much, if at all.

LarnerReviewed Chapter: 4 on 3/24/2006
Oh, dear--an invitation to sunburn if there ever was one! But I can certainly understand his feelings. And to notice at this age that Ferumbras wasn't particularly sorry Lalia was now dead was quite insightful.

Hope Frodo comes to find him before he's quite done to a turn.

Author Reply: Yes, an open invitation...

Pippin is pretty insightful. I think he would be noticing that Ferumbras was not especially sad. This was, after all, the first time he'd been to a funeral, and he'd be observing everything with those sharp green eyes.

Good ol' Frodo...

TiggerReviewed Chapter: 4 on 3/23/2006
Interesting start Dreamflower. Hyacinth wouldn't have been modeled after Mrs. Bucket on Keeping Up Appearances, would she? Only that one is much funnier. What did Pippin do that was so dreadful to her? Interesting indeed. Looking forward to seeing where this goes. :o)

Author Reply: The short answer is "Yes, she would". When I first introduced her in "A New Reckoning", she was originally intended to be a bit of comic relief--a silly snob. But somewhere along the line in that story, she suddenly revealed to me a hidden "dark side", and she actually turned out to be pretty wicked underneath. But she's kept that part of herself more or less hidden from everyone except her husband. Most of them *do* think of her as being rather like "that" Hyacinth--stupid, silly and over-concerned with appearances. It helps that *that* part of her characterization is true. But people see only that shallow part of her personality, and don't bother to plumb the depths of the cruelty underneath.

As to what did Pippin do? He was born, that's all. And then to add insult to injury, he survived. Rather put a spoke in her wheel in her plans to make Reggie Thain (never mind that he doesn't *want* to be Thain.)

Baggins BabeReviewed Chapter: 4 on 3/23/2006
Oh dear - do I spy sunstroke for poor Pippin? Ack!

It was so sweet to see Pip's observations at the funeral - Ferumbras not speaking very warmly about his mother, Pearl looking pale and miserable, and how like our favourite Took to notice Frodo's strain and sadness.

Looking forward to the next chapter with great trepidation.

Author Reply: Well, keep in mind, I wrote this story for the PippinHealer's group...

Pippin is a very perceptive child when it comes to other people, and most especially he is observant of those he loves. And this is his first funeral--he could not help but be looking to understand what was going on.

I'll have it up as soon as Lindelea gets it back to me.

Jeodo BrandybuckReviewed Chapter: 4 on 3/23/2006
Excellent! I didn't get a chance to read this one when it first came out, but I'm enjoying it very much! I love your views of the scenery of the Shire, I'm enjoying the small-town gossip-y feel of some of the hobbits, (which goodness knows, the kindly professor seemed to acknowledge)the action is interesting, I love your portrayal of the hobbits, and am surprised to read a delightful version of Pip's sisters, which I usually don't enjoy quite as much as I'm enjoying these. Well done! I can't wait to keep reading!

Jeodo Brandybuck

Author Reply: This first appeared on the PippinHealer's yahoo group, as a serial. It has not been seen by those not on the group, and this version also is being beta'd by the talented Lindelea, while the one I posted first was "raw". So you will be seeing it in a much improved form.

I am trying here to convey that gossipy and insular attitude of hobbits that JRRT spoke of, as well as the atmosphere of intrigue that would have existed at Great Smials under the eye of such a domineering and selfish hobbit as he described Lalia being. It would only have been with the example of someone like Lalia, that someone like Hyacinth would have thought she could have any chance to succeed.

I am enjoying a chance to show more of Pippin's sisters. My idea is that they pretty much adored their pestiferous baby brother, LOL, and spoiled him rotten whenever they were not being run ragged by his boundless energy, or being driven crazy by his pranks. They have their moments, of course, as siblings will, but I think they were a pretty close family, overall.

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