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A Lesser Treason  by Jay of Lasgalen 19 Review(s)
pipinheartReviewed Chapter: 1 on 12/29/2005


You have to feel sorry for Elrohir, he is troubled, and wished things could have been different. Those voices aren't a good sighn, some evil I think is trying to influence him to do something he shouldn't...He should trust his father...

Nice job...Love it..

Author Reply: Poor Elrohir. Yes, he's depressed - but doesn't realise that it's the Ring doing it. Hearing voices is never a good thing!

TithenFeredirReviewed Chapter: 1 on 12/1/2005
The thing that struck me immediately about Elrohir's musings was that they seemed uncharacteristic. Elves are not perfect, but they are described as growing wiser and fairer over time- you would think that little things like who was born first would be completely insignificant by that point in Elrohir's life and the greater issues of family, home and the fate of the world would have already been pondered at length such that much of the anguish and second-guessing would already be at least addressed if not resolved. The way you describe it, the ring must have begun its seduction the moment he set foot in Imladris and at the time of the events in this chapter Elrohir is as yet unaware that his thoughts have been significantly influenced. Then he comes into close proximity with Frodo and the whispering begins. It is so insidious and chilling. Somehow it seems more of a perversion for an elf to be affected that way than a man. It certainly magnifies the impression of what a dangerous relic the ring is and how remarkable it is that Frodo is not so quickly affected by it. *shudder* ~TF

Author Reply: You're right - these thoughts are very out-of-character for Elrohir (although the 'little brother' teasing is a running theme throughout my twin stories). He's not thinking clearly at all. He knows the Ring is present in Imladris, but (a) doesn't think it will affect him, (b) thinks his depression is because Aragorn and the others are off on an adventure, and (c) doesn't want his sister to become mortal.

Elrohir has influence and power simply because of who he is, and the Ring is trying to use this against him.

DaynawaynaReviewed Chapter: 1 on 11/28/2005
Yikes! No-touchie the hobbit!

Very good first chapter, Jay. I love your stories and can't wait to see where this one ends up! :)

Author Reply: Hopefully Elrohir won't kill the hobbit either :)

I'm glad you're enjoying this. Who would have thought that the Ring would prey on Elrohir like this?

elliskaReviewed Chapter: 1 on 11/25/2005
Ooo! Sorry to be so behind in reading and reviewing but this was great to find waiting for me! I love stories that explore the affect the Ring had on various people and I don't think I have ever seen one that focused on the twins. Coming from you, this will be great and it certainly has started out so. Looking forward to more!

Author Reply: The Ring was in Imladris for about two months, and I think it would have preyed on the minds of those around it during that time. Who's to say that Elrohir is the only one affected? And what will it do to him?

Thanks for the review!

LarnerReviewed Chapter: 1 on 11/23/2005
Ah, It seeks another victim, does It? Beware, Elrohir--beware!

Excellent image of the lure the Ring might have taken.

Author Reply:
:(

Poor Elrohir. He's in trouble here.

He wouldn't have been tempted by power or glory - but a way for his sister to retain her immortality? For Imladris never to fade? You can see he'd be tempted :(


periantariReviewed Chapter: 1 on 11/22/2005
As others have said, this is a very intriguing idea~ I really like your description of Elrohir's feelings and his feelings of inferiority to Elladan and his great desire to make everyone proud of him by doing great deeds.
I can't wait for more! You left us quite a cliff-hanger. :)
Good job in this~ =)

Author Reply: Cliff-hangers are good!! :)

When I first had the idea for this story, Elrohir's petty jealousies of Elladan -jealousies he hasn't even thought about for years - were an important part of it, though I don't think he wants glory and pride. He just wants his family to be safe :(

Thanks for the review!

DaninaReviewed Chapter: 1 on 11/21/2005
Oooooooooooooooooh.

This is very intriguing, whether it goes AU (i.e, he DOES it) or not. A great exploration of what one of Elrond's sons might have gone through...and the way the Ring could appeal most especially to someone who KNEW who bore the Three. This conflict between Elrond's duty as steward of Vilya and of Middle-Earth and Elrohir's desire -- so simple, so understandable! -- to keep his home and regain his mother.

And you started with "Murder In The Cathedral"!! Squee!!

Author Reply: Thanks! I thought it was an interesting idea to explore, especially as I've not seen anyone else consider it. I think the Ring could find a way to make anyone vulnerable to it - poor Elrohir's not immune. Vilya, and Elrohir's suppressed thoughts about his father's possession of that ring, adds an intrguing dimension.

Glad you liked the quote, too - it was just right for this story.

LiannaReviewed Chapter: 1 on 11/21/2005
When I first saw the Fellowship of the Ring movie (I had not read the LOTR books at that time), I expected that after Boromir, other members of the Fellowship would be tempted by the Ring, one by one, each in his own way.

Of course, I know now that Tolkien chose a different storyline. But it's interesting to think about the effect that the Ring could have on various people in Tolkien's universe. I wouldn't have thought of Elrohir as a likely victim of Ring lust, but why not? I'm sure that the Ring could find a personalized way to appeal to anyone.

Now I'm wondering whether Elrohir will overcome this on his own or whether someone else -- perhaps someone with more knowledge of Rings of Power -- will intervene.

Author Reply: The temptation of the Ring is an issue I would have liked to see Tolkien explore a little more. Apart from Gollum, we only see glimpses (with Bilbo and Galadriel) of what the Ring could have done to other characters.

I don't think of Elrohir as a likely victim either - which is why he was so totally unprepared. He didn't expect it.

Now, what will happen next?

DreamflowerReviewed Chapter: 1 on 11/20/2005
Oh this is so intriguing! I'd not considered Elrohir as being tempted--but he'd certainly be as much a target as anyone else.

I have to say that the sorts of temptations the Ring is offering would be dreadfully hard to overcome. Not that I doubt he will--after all you did not say this was AU.

And I love the use of the quote, and the way you reversed it--beautiful, absolutely.

Author Reply: No, it's not AU - after all, do you really think I could write evil!Elrohir?

I don't think an elf like Elrohir would be in the least tempted by power or glory - but a way to keep his family safe, to preserve his home - that would be the way to lure him in. Clever Ring.

Glad you liked the quotation - it was one I looked up, and it seemed perfect.

DotReviewed Chapter: 1 on 11/20/2005
Wow. This is very atmospheric. And such an interesting premise too.

You really captured the sense of Elrohir’s restlessness as events move inexorably forward around him, and of the innate peace of Imladris being disturbed as it never has before. His fears and regrets are very understandable but there’s a sense of despair in him that tells us that this is more than just his own thoughts.

It was both fascinating and frightening to see how the ring works on Elrohir’s mind, playing on his doubts enough to separate him from his family, from his brother, and bringing him here to Frodo. It manages to suggest such awful things about his father and uses the one thing that must still haunt him – his mother’s torment, and yet at the same time uses his deep love for his family and his home to tempt him. Elrohir already knows what Vilya alone can do so how tempting it must be to think of what the One Ring can do together with Vilya. Very clever. You’ve made this scarily believable.

The last paragraph is just chilling. I very much look forward to seeing where you go with this.


Author Reply: While planning this chapter, I decided that Elrohir's strengths would be his love for his brother, his father, his sister - but the Ring, of course, managed to change them into weaknessess. It started him wondering 'what if ...', and questioning his father's wisdom :(

You’ve made this scarily believable. Thank you! It's what I wanted you to feel.

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