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The Choice of Healing  by Larner 121 Review(s)
Eirinn LeighReviewed Chapter: 17 on 7/18/2015
Just a geography check!

“But there’s no place people go to the West of us. The only ones who go West are Dwarves going to the Iron Hills.”

It's the Blue Mountains not the Iron Hills.

Author Reply: Oh, I know--I made many such mistakes in my earliest stories, Eirinn. I hope to correct them someday, but am still struggling to finish "Stirring Rings" and then "Or Perchance" and "The Tenant from Staddle." Too many stories are taking too long to write, it seems.

Thanks so!

Queen GaladrielReviewed Chapter: 21 on 4/17/2006
Oh, I'm so glad this story ended with such bright promise. The White Tree bearing fruit, Hobbits coming to serve in Minas Tirith... And I'm so glad they could all know that Frodo and Sam passed in blessedness.

Very interesting notes! It's amazing what we can draw from real life, isn't it?--from experiences to the look of an opium vial.

I've enjoyed this tale very much--rereading what I'd read before, and finally reaching the glorious end.
God bless,
Galadriel

Author Reply: At last appear to be back online with no further problems. Am SO tired of computer hassles.

It's wonderful for me to consider how things might have happened with Frodo and Sam as they chose to accept the Gift at the last. And I find I keep imagining Frodo seeking to slip away once more, and once again being foiled. Then, that Frodo and Sam's passing from Arda beyond its bounds might have led to the White Tree's fruiting on both sides of the Sundering Seas is somehow satisfying, I find.

I do try to reflect real life when I can, and am so glad such is found acceptable by so many. I had one opium vial I kept here. In China they manufactured some beautiful bottles of finest porcelain and sometimes silver for those accustomed to using opium on a regular basis; but here in our little Victorian seaport town most of what was imported came in these small bottles sealed with the glass globule.

So glad you enjoyed this story, and hope one day you have the chance to read Lesser Ring. Just posted my latest, which I think you'll find shortly.

Queen GaladrielReviewed Chapter: 19 on 4/17/2006
Oh! I would say it's beautiful, but that doesn't describe it enough.

I love the light talk and banter, and seeing Frodo being a Hobbit again. It really is as if Sam and he were halves of one soul, and both are needed to make that being whole.

And the image of the two of them dancing among the stars, dancing away out of Arda itself, is just breath-taking! And the carol captures the feeling perfectly.
God bless,
Galadriel

Author Reply: Oh, I'm so glad you appreciate it, my Lady. Frodo at the end is able to be himself not just as he was but as he was intended to become as well; and I do agree the two are halves of the same whole in many ways.

And I think that for Frodo the ability to dance among the stars would be his ideal way of leaving Arda.

Thanks so much for letting me know what has moved you most.

Queen GaladrielReviewed Chapter: 18 on 4/13/2006
The spirit of Ungoliant was what made the wound keep filling as it did? She was trying to consume him from the inside out? Ugh!! Oh, that is horrible--makes me squirm to think of! But a very interesting explanation. And I think I may see an opening for a short story here. What did Frodo feel during this ordeal? Or have you already done it?

I love this little scene:

“I won’t ever be far from you, you know, Frodo. I’ll always be there near your right shoulder, by your mum and dad and Rory and Gilda.”

“And who will be at my left shoulder, then?”

“Who else? Your Aunt Dora, puffing like a dragon but with the heart of a mallow, as always.”

Frodo laughed in spite of himself as he looked into the eyes of his beloved Uncle Bilbo. Bilbo’s eyes shone with a special light this night, as
they stood together and watched the stars for a time before they went into the small summer house one last time together.

Very sweet and poignant, but gentle as well. I'm so glad Bilbo never lost his sense of humour. :)
God bless,
Galadriel

Author Reply: If you find yourself moved to write a short story regarding Frodo and the spider bite, do feel free to indulge yourself. I'd be glad to see what it sparks.

There is a species of spiders in South America that lays its eggs just below the surface of the skin of the host. A blister appears over the egg, and as the spiderling grows before it's ready to face a hostile world it feeds on the flesh and blood of its host; then one day the skin splits and the spider emerges. This has inspired a few horror stories and movies, as you can well imagine; and I borrowed this in part from "The Religion" and sort of did my own take on it for this story.

I doubt Bilbo Baggins would ever lose his sense of humor, or lose his desire to reassure Frodo that all will be well. And I think that even as he prepared to leave Frodo he'd find a way to make his younger cousin laugh. Frodo tended to be far too solemn and needed reason to remember how to laught, I think.

Queen GaladrielReviewed Chapter: 17 on 4/13/2006
Oh, this is so sad. But it goes right along with Reconciliation, each filling in the gaps left by the other without repeating too much. The letters are very touching, especially those to Narcissa and to Ferdi and Bard.

Of course Rosie would be the one to realise Frodo was leaving and speak to him about it. "Make him want to come back..." That's so like Frodo.

It's a bit frightening to imagine--being so weak that one doesn't even have the strength to move about at will. I've read about it often enough, but I guess this really brought it home.
God bless,
Galadriel

Author Reply: It's a very difficult thing for those who have been independent throughout their lives to realize suddenly they are now unable to do much for themselves. My late husband grew quite despondent over this often during his last few months, and I've seen it in others as well. Trying to maintain ones sense of dignity as one sees oneself losing control of muscles and sphincters and even the ability to breathe properly is most disconcerting; yet so often it is part of dying.

And I do believe Frodo would want Sam to live fully here, now that life was opening up for him again; and that Rosie would be the one to fully appreciate just what Frodo was planning and its implications.

And am glad you appreciate the final letters. Thank you so much for the feedback.

Queen GaladrielReviewed Chapter: 15 on 4/9/2006
 I know you just got an empty review; sorry, I didn't mean to do that--accidentally pressed post before I'd even written anything.

Oh, the first part of this chapter had me wiping my eyes. To think of Freddy meaning to comfort Frodo, and it working the opposite way instead...I've read
such things before, even heard true accounts, but it never ceases to amaze me. It's almost more heartbreaking that way. Reading this section a passage
from A Small and Passing Thing came to mind, about the Shire putting on her finest gown for Frodo.

Esmeralda is right: Frodo could be lying on his deathbed and still declare he was perfectly all right. To use a very Bilbo-ish expression, bless and bebother the stubbornness of Bagginses!

I loved the meeting with Glorfindel and the vision of Galadriel on the hill. Yes, she definitely knows how to reason with him, and it was very wise and effective to use the bowl.

Frodo's memory must have lived on long, long after he was gone. I like to think that, though there may not have always been a Baggins at Bag End, there would always be those who remembered them.

I've had far less experience than you have with drugs and such, and I wish for no more. I recall once having a very bad cold and my mother giving me Nighquil (sorry if it's spelled wrong) so that I could sleep it off. Well, she woke me not half an hour later, wanting me to take yet more herbs. I came down to get the stuff, and she gave me a pack of batteries I'd requested. The next thing I remember is waking up in my room and wondering what on earth I'd done with them. I found them nearly a week later, in a drawer that I never would have put them in had I been thinking clearly, and said I'd never take such medicine again if I could help it.

I share your fear of needles to an extent, but what really freaks me out is whatever the instrument is that eye doctors use to check the pressure. I just can't stand having something probing at my eye like that, and I know I've had more than one frustrated with me because of it.

Consider yourself fortunate. :) One of my little siblings will ask me to do something as simple as caring for a cut or scrape, and it leads to frustration on both sides because they're already in pain, and I'm terrified I'll hurt them worse just trying to tend it.

God bless,
Galadriel

Author Reply: I just deleted the empty one. Having done that a few times myself, or having written wonderful reviews only to hit the back instead of the post button I know how easy such things are to do.

As I've said before, it was reading "A Small and Passing Thing" that sparked me to begin writing fanfiction myself, and even this moment is almost taken from her work, although I've significantly changed a good deal of it as well. Lindelea has done so marvelous word pictures in it, and the one you've indicated has to be one of the best.

So glad you agree with Esmeralda. She has her younger cousin and former fosterling pegged, doesn't she? And love your invocation of Bilbo's comments here. It certainly fits!

To accept a grace ordinarily given only to Elves I think Frodo needs to interact with them about it; and so Glorfindel, while on his return from the Havens with news about the ship being built, finds Frodo and helps him understand how to better use the power of the gem he wears; and then Frodo and Galadriel discuss the choice and what it means and how it might affect him. The emptiness left within him in the wake of the Ring's destruction must have been terrifying to face at times.

Bilbo has already become synonymous with madness and eccentricity; Frodo was being gossiped about as being "cracked" even before the Party. Yet there are those, those whose evaluation truly means something, who know that Bilbo wasn't the least bit crazy--unless he was "crazy like a fox." And the same ones will recognize that Frodo is also intelligent and caring and will miss him terribly. Those who count know the real Frodo and Bilbo, and honor them as they deserve.

I had a kidney stone, and then a case of endometriosis that nearly cost me a kidney and did end up forcing me to have an emergency hysterectomy. Both times I was given morphine. I didn't particularly appreciate it either time, and hate what some painkillers did to me and some other meds that aren't supposed to have psychological effects but did anyway. But, then, I'm a good deal older than you are and so have had more chance for things to happen from time to time. Your own turn is coming, I'm sorry to say, but such is life.

Your Niquil story is hilarious.

I can do first aid, but tend to hyperventilate if I see hypodermics. I know--I'm pathetic.

Queen GaladrielReviewed Chapter: 14 on 4/7/2006
I must say, Sam and Rosie are very brave. But then, I wouldn't want to lance those boils if I'd never done it before, either, and not sure I could have done it, even if I had. But my goodness, Frodo worries too much. The scars were covered up, and the boils on his neck looked about like any others, I would think. I'm glad Rosie, talked to him, though. Of course he doesn't horrify her!

I don't think I could ever trust poppy juice now if I had to. I know Frodo overdoced--purposely--but still...

Goodness knows this pattern ought to be familiar by now--Frodo weakening, the fading becoming more and more obvious; and it is. But it's no less heartbreaking. If only Aragorn could have come--though I suppose he could do very little now to help Frodo, but he might have been able to hearten him a little. And if only Frodo had told Sam he was leaving; Sam already guessed that he might, after all. Hmmm...that might be a good AU...

The sun-lad. Yes, perfect.
God bless,
Galadriel

Author Reply: I am terrified of needles, and so my mother verbally instructed me as to how to remove splinters, and I became so good at it I was made the family splinter remover, for I could do it with as little discomfort to others as possible. So I see it with Rosie, the one confident enough to communicate to the rest of her family that the needle or fine blade isn't going deeper than the surface and will release the pressure and the infection, helping the person get better. So here I've projected part of my own experience onto Rosie.

Frodo knows that the only thing he's likely to feel is a brief increase in the pressure and the pain that's already there, followed by the release of it as the wound empties; but Sam, who's never done this before and is afraid of possibly making things worse (he's heard Aragorn, Elladan, Elrohir, and Elrond all say that probling the wound could paralyze his master, after all, and he's not certain just what probing means, probably), is too tentative to do it right and too inexperienced to know precisely how deep to press.

I suspect the Ring, while he carried it, finding that an exaggerated form of modesty and a degree of vanity for his accepted good looks were already there in Frodo's makeup, exaggerated these qualities to the point that he cannot bear to have most others see him as he is now--I suspect he sees the scars as more than just scars but as physical defilement. The idea of them on himself makes him feel ugly beyond belief, a situation the Ring Itself would probably find highly amusing; and he's certain they will horrify others equally.

Yes, he needed Rosie's perspective--the first person who tells him as it is, that these aren't disfigurements but are instead proof positive of worthy intent and add to the love and respect she feels for him. At least it may help him get back a bit of perspective in considering them in the future.

I've been afraid of using mind- and mood-altering drugs and medications, for I hate to think of losing my self-control. When I've found medications affect my ability to function fairly soberly I've refused to take them again.

I have needed to have morphine twice, and I found I didn't particularly care for it. It didn't (in me) relieve the pain so much as it made me less responsive to it and able to sleep until my resting body could then deal with the source of that pain better so that when I woke up I felt considerably better. The second time they had to give me two pain pills and two valiums to help deal with the extreme pain I was in and to help relieve my fear of the needle so they could do the blood tests necessary to try to figure out what I was suffering with and to allow me to accept the morphine. My doctors have NEVER found me an easy patient, you see--not since I was quite small. Frodo managed to retain only enough to put him out for a few hours, and may have had a bit of a hangover afterwards. But he'll be all right in the end.

The dreams and imaginings narcotics can cause disturb me more than anything else in my very limited experience with such things.

Queen GaladrielReviewed Chapter: 12 on 4/7/2006
Oh, Frodo! Yes, indeed he does need supervision. I don't know which I pity more, him or Sam--perhaps both. I've always identified most closely with Sam, feeling the same love and care (to the extent that the reader can) that he does, and if I were in his place, trying to help Frodo when he doesn't know what he wants, just dealing with all of this and trying to be strong enough for both as Frodo's strength begins to wane, would tear my heart out.

I can understand the half-crying, but pray what in all the world was there to laugh about?

All right, I'm sorry. :) I meant nothing about the rice, truly. Just look at it this way: I suppose not being able to bear it has its disadvantages, but you have that to put into your writing. But it's hard when you can enjoy almost anything as I can (okay, not everything, but only because there are some things I just physically can't accept); and it makes it hard when you have to come up with a food a character absolutely detests. I love rice, myself, enough that I can live on the stuff when I must (and I have, almost entirely, for weeks at a time, and still must occasionally) and still like it afterward. But all the same I love your description. :)
God bless,
Galadriel

Author Reply: I certainly agree with you about Sam and his heart feeling torn. Frodo himself doesn't fully understand what he wants, and Sam doesn't feel free to ask him to cling to life solely for his sake.

There were times as my husband was in his final illness he wished the end would just come and be done with it; then he would be defying it with all he had in him just a short time later, insisting he be able to see as much as he could before he went. Had Frodo been accepting the athelas draught during this time he'd probably be nowhere near as confused and in as much discomfort and all as he is; but having become convinced by Budgie that the draught's benefits were psychosomatic, he stopped taking it and found the digestive problems are back at full force. Frodo, of course, isn't certain what it all means, if this weakening is just due to not having been able to keep much of anything down or if he's seriously ill or what; and he's about given up.

It takes the night on the hill and a secret visit from Elladan to appreciate that he still holds the choice and can remain if he wishes, and to find a small reason at least to remain, one which will give him time to marshall his slowly returning strength to defy the memories the next time they return.

I have seen similar things in birds. Now and then a bird will find its way into my house into the upper story of the sun room wing. Three times I've found a bird only a hair's breadth from dying of frustration, unable to find its way out. Feeling totally trapped it has given up to the point at last I can take it in my hands and bring it to the window. There at last, realizing it is now where it is meant to be, it will manage to find the reserves within it to grasp once more at life and actually fly to freedom again. I see Frodo in that state right at this point in the story.

As for half-laughing--even at our weakest there often is a part of us that steps aside and looks down at what we do to ourselves and laughs at our own absurdities, and I see that in Frodo there in the study as he falls against the door--that objective side of himself that wants to take the rest of himself and, as Sam is also tempted to do, wants to whack some sense into the hyper-emotional self that has taken over and gotten the whole self into this situation. I strongly remember one situation when the Kid, then only sixteen, snapped out of an emotional highjacking to look down at me, physically clinging to him to keep him from running off and doing something VERY stupid and dangerous, and laughing at the both of us. It's there in most of us with imagination, I think you'll find.

So, there are a few foods even you can't eat. There is such for everyone, you'll find. I just tend to be more verbal about it than many others, but then I do have IBS, acid reflux disease, and a few similar conditions that make it physically more likely that if I defy my own tastes and eat things anyway it will be regretted fairly quickly. And it's fun to figure out what our characters will and won't like. To make them real we have to give them likes and dislikes, after all.

Queen GaladrielReviewed Chapter: 11 on 4/7/2006
Aw! I had a nice review written a couple of chapters back, but my computer did--something--and I lost it.

“I’ve written a letter to Budgie Smallfoot as well. Make certain as he gets it.”

“Samwise Gamgee--”

“Don’t Samwise Gamgee me, Frodo Baggins. You go stay with a healer, he ought to know that some things have helped you soothe.”

“All right, Sam, I promise I will give the letter to Budgie.”

“As soon as you get there?”

Frodo sighed and said, “I promise.

“Good. Take care, Mr. Frodo."

*grins* That's sweet. Sam acts just like a parent--like my mom the first time I did the solo bus trip thing when I was twelve (and, in fact, every time since...*sigh*). Dear me, she worried until I didn't think I'd have the nerve or the wit to remember what to do and where to go! But Sam was being practical, anyway, and not worrying for nothing, as Mom was.

It's heart-renching to see poor, dear Frodo in so much pain, so incoherent. Budgie obviously didn't understand, but at least he tried. And Freddy seemed to know somewhat how to handle things.

Speaking of understanding, it's just amazing, the difference between Saradoc and Paladin in that respect. Saradoc maybe doesn't understand, but he really, truly tries, and is willing to listen. Paladin and Eglantine are just too impatient and afraid to believe what Pippin is telling them. But to say that they couldn't believe a word of it was plain folly.

If only Frodo could explain to Narcissa. And I declare he's good at telling the stories and making it seem as if he had no part in it! Not that it would be easy to tell any other way--isn't easy as it is, I don't think.

Poor Frodo, of course he'd come back ravenous from those feasts if he's going to pick through a plate of rice and take only the meat and vegetables. :) Is it really that bad?
God bless,
Galadriel

Author Reply: Having had my own computer problems, how can I complain about others?

Sam knows Frodo now, and how he'll try to hide his condition. Of course he wants Budgie prewarned. Yes, he's like a parent now, and understands Frodo may need some supervision if he pushes himself to hard. And my own mother did the same to me, as I did with my kids.

Freddy's been somewhat under the Shadow, having fought in the resistance and been imprisoned. He has a better idea of the type of effects what Frodo's been through will have than Budgie does. He also knows Frodo better, and grew up also hearing Bilbo's stories. He knows that there are things out there that they don't see in the Shire; and is more likely to believe in giant spiders and Morgul wounds and the like. Budgie is too practical and too apt not to believe what he's not seen himself.

The experience with the memories taking over would be frightening, particularly if it so strongly triggers the pain as well. And if Frodo might be experiencing angina at the moment or possibly as heart attack as well, that would make the whole thing even worse.

I certainly agree with the difference between the two sets of parents; and just stating blankly "I refuse to believe" will get you nowhere in dealing with the person trying to explain what happened. Sara is trying to accept without prejudgement, which in the long run will get him a LOT farther--once he can convince Merry to talk, at least.

I, too, found myself wanting Frodo to explain to Narcissa, but he's not ready to do so as yet, unfortunately. But she will understand in the end in spite of him, at least.

I go to the Chinese restaurant, and I'm served fried rice with my meal. I pick out the chicken and the vegetables and leave that mound of rice there on my plate. Is it that bad, you ask? For me, YES!!! And so it goes for poor Frodo as well, poor Hobbit. Mouth full of laundry starch! Can't stand the taste or the texture.

Queen GaladrielReviewed Chapter: 6 on 4/6/2006
Well, I *thought* I would get to read this while I was gone, but evidently my crazy Pac Mate had other ideas. I downloaded this whole thing into one file. Well, that was stupid of me; the file was huge and the PM couldn't open it. I had access to my computer briefly on Sunday, and broke it down into four parts; that had to work. I went to open the first part, and it was full of what my mom calls "junk"; by which I mean it was unreadable--looked a whole lot like the stuff a Braille embosser will give you when something major goes wrong. I just don't know what the deal is. But technology will have its little quirks, and on the whole I find I really love the PM.

It's wonderful to see everyone pitching in to help renew and rebuild. That's the good in situations like these; the need unites everyone, forces everyone to work together, even those who wouldn't normally be willing to do so. And it's also wonderful to see the friendship between Frodo and Isumbard reviving.

Oh, but I've been meaning to ask this for months now--how did you settle on rice as the hated food? :) I've been curious about that since I started reading this the first time, and I have to smile at Frodo's description of it. I can just see young Frodo giving Eglantine that look, as if to say, "You can do and say whatever you like, but I will *not* eat that dreadful stuff!" :)

You really built on this with The Acceptable Sacrifice. I don't recall really noticing the mention of Eldamir and his family before, and read of the glassblower with passing interest. But now these characters have really been brought to life, such details are much more noticeable and interesting.

Oh, if only it hadn't been *that* coin! That Bartolo could have explained his errand before asking for a coin in that way! But at least it's made right in the end.
God bless,
Galadriel

Author Reply: Isn't technology wonderful? First thing you do when you start working with computers is learn how to swear in several languages, including in my case Basic, dBase, and now am looking for words in Sindarin! Heh! My laptop's power supply just died, and as I write on it predominantly it's cramping my style and making it longer before I get chapters written.

Disasters tend to bring out either the best or the worst in folks, and in this case mostly the best. You're right--it's wonderful that Tolkien indicated all would work together now. And there is finally a friendship growing between Bard and Frodo, one which might have begun when they were much younger but foundered for years due to the failed relationship between Frodo and Pearl and Bard's eventual marriage to her; but now they're able to see beyond Pearl to the great individual each is and learning to respect one another as is right and proper.

Why rice? Well, primarily because that's how I feel about it. I can't bring myself to eat rice unless it doesn't taste a thing like rice. I can occasionally stand Spanish rice, but it had best be more meat than rice or I'll want to rid my stomach of it. We do tend to project real life into our stories, after all; and the conflict between hating rice and it being one of the easiest dishes to digest was just too good to miss, don't you agree?

Having touched on these characters here and in "The King's Commission" I had to expand on them in "The Acceptable Sacrifice," you know. Now we feel as if we truly know them.

Personally, I can't imagine Bartolo having warned Frodo of why he wished to know if Frodo had a coin. Not in his nature. But, as you say, it's made right in the end.

Glad to see you back, my lady!


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