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| A Charge To Keep by French Pony | 7 Review(s) |
|---|---|
| TithenFeredir | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 4/11/2005 |
| The way you built up the tension in this chapter was very effective and the battle was very well done. It was fast, confusing, brutal, and truly scary. You didn't show any mercy to the patrol, and that made it so realistic. ~TF | |
| perelleth | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 4/8/2005 |
| Mmm, now I fully understand your claim about forensics in the foreword. You got me here!(Again, I should add. I was awed by your explanation of how Fingon had to break and then sever Maedhros' hand! I'm not fond of "gorensics" myself, but I do appreciate a good job when I see one!) I think I'd never before read of a battle so focused on the nasty sounds of broken bones, and rent flesh (is it my imagination or I really heard it?)you do have an eye for forensic detail, truth be told, I simply bow. As I've said before, this is a wonderful gap filler, I'm enjoying it a lot. I'm still haunted by that image in chapter two, of Thranduil sitting in silence and pondering gollum. It struck me, really. | |
| Dot | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 4/5/2005 |
| Such a great chapter. I really like the group of guards and their kindness to Gollum as well as the friendship and banter between themselves. I though it was interesting that you didn’t make Legolas the captain of them. I don’t know why I presumed you would. You painted such a sad, hopeless and extremely ominous picture of the approaching Shadow. It was a very moving moment when Thranduil reached out to Luindil, and I like how willing he is to trust the Dwarves. I really love your Thranduil. He’s so much more open than most people make him, despite the darkness at his door, and still there’s no sense of naïveté about his openness, but a feeling that it stems from wisdom. Nice. Despite knowing what had to happen, my heart was still in my mouth when the guards were starting to become uneasy about Gollum’s silence. Such tension! I was actually quite touched by the fact that one of their first thoughts was that he was injured. Even if they did still decide to leave him in the tree. I thought it was very effective the way the way Menellir and Thranduil were both uneasy about something in the forest. And then the battle! Wow, that was horrible. The sounds in particular had me cringing but it was such a vivid picture, written marvellously. I can’t wait for the next update – I’m just dying to know where you’re taking this! | |
| Karri | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 4/5/2005 |
| A wonderful chapter, FP! This description of what happened is well done and the characters are all beautifully portrayed. | |
| elliska | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 4/5/2005 |
| When did you post this? I swear I didn't see it last night. This is just a scary chapter and you did a good job portraying that. Gollum going stil in the tree, the conversation about the spread of the shadow and the lack of food, Menellir and Thranduil's feeling that all is not right...all add up to a nice spooky tone. And for very good reasons. That battle was just nasty! The sound effects were particularly disgusting. Good job. :) And a good job fleshing out the scene in the tree that canon only gives us one sentence or so about. That was one heck of a place to leave us! I did not imagine Legolas getting injuried in this so that really surprised me. I'm looking forward to seeing how you get him out of the mess he's in. | |
| Lamiel | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 4/4/2005 |
| And then? And then? I know that Legolas has to survive the attack, but that isn't much comfort when you leave us on such a cliff-hanger as this! What if the Orcs take him with them and Gollum? I'd never thought of it before, but it could happen. Oh, and THAT would add a whole new level to the story! I'm having thoughts of Dol Guldor, and the Witchking, and all sorts of delicious levels of Elf torture . . . ahem. I'll try to restrain myself. Loved the way all the Elves were uneasy, especially Thranduil. Ooh, no matter how this comes out, he is NOT going to be a happy Elvenking. Oh, and nice characterization of him regarding the Dwarves, too. Such a relief to see him as the fully fleshed out character he should be, and not a cipher. Good job with this chapter - and there's no telling where you'll go from here. I'm looking forward to more. | |
| daw the minstrel | Reviewed Chapter: 3 on 4/4/2005 |
| Oh wow. That was tense. I like the way you have Legolas as one of the guards, but not in charge. That makes for an interesting dynamic here. I also like how kind and patient the elves are with Gollum. | |