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|A Conspiracy of Hobbits by Dreamflower||4 Review(s)|
|Gryffinjack||Reviewed Chapter: 21 on 11/9/2005|
|You really do a fine job of meshing the story together with the book! I guess they really are on their way finally.|
"Pippin had to admit to himself he was feeling down. He hated that Frodo was being forced into this danger. He hated that Frodo had to give up everything he loved. He *really* hated the Sackville-Bagginses getting Bag End."
It takes a lot to get the usually optimistic Pippin down, but this certainly would do it. This was very succinctly and well said. I expect that worse than an even-keeled individul's being depressed would be someone who is normally quite optimistic. They are not used to being that way and don't know how to handle it as well.
I would think that this is precisely what happened to Frodo when his parents died, since Frodo's personality seems to be pretty much like Pippins, except for the tragedy in his life. But even so, as we saw in the earlier chapter, Frodo still had difficulties handling all of the upheaval in his life and found it quite paralysing. Merry has his lists and duties to help not to dwell on things for now.
But Pippin, the tweenager is not accustomed to being down or depressed and with his mood swings, I expect he has fantastic highs but that when he is down, he is *really* down, especially since he cannot burden Frodo right now and he does not have his Merry. Now that everything is done, the only thing to do is to wait, which leaves plenty of time to think about how dire the situation really is. This is when Pippin leaves his childhood behind and starts to truly grow up.
I cannot say enough about the way you are developing Freddy. He has such depth and character to him and you really lay out a very sound friendship between him and Merry. I am a bit surprised that Freddy had never met Esmerelda before, considering that they are related. I'm sure she must have met his parents, at the very least at the funeral of Drogo and Primula Baggins since they died in Buckland. Perhaps Freddy's parents used to tell him stories of what happened to Frodo's parents and *that* is why Freddy is so afraid of water. Hmmm... Anyway, Esmerelda reminds me of her son with her reliance upon the lists and diagrams for organising Crickhollow.
Odd ending of the chapter - it almost looks like there is a part that is missing, the way you have the line under the book quote where Pippin says he is hungry for lunch. However, the last of the line about Sam looking out on lands he has never been to before works very well as the end to the chapter.
Author Reply: Yes. This is pretty hard on Pippin. No Merry to confide in, and as his worries are *about* Frodo, he can't confide in him. Nor, really, even in Sam, as they will be in Frodo's company almost the whole trek. It has to have him very down.
I'm glad you like my Freddy, and his friendship with Merry. I thought it only natural, as they will be brothers-in-law one day. Though as of yet, neither of them has any idea at all of that. You're not the first one to bring up whether Freddy might have met Esmeralda. I'm thinking that when he was a good deal younger, their paths may have crossed at the Great Smials--as at Lalia's funeral. But I'm thinking Freddy may not have remembered the introduction if any were made. The adults probably did know one another. However, there probably would have been no reason to go to Buckland for the funerals of Drogo and Primula, because the relationship was pretty distant, and given Odovocar's feeling about the River (pretty much the same as Freddy's) I don't think they would have gone. And even if they had, Freddy would only have been about two.
So, yeah the parents *had* probably met, but no reason that their son would have met her before. Anyway, that's my take on it.
I meant to take that line off. One of these days I will, LOL!
|Pervinca||Reviewed Chapter: 21 on 4/9/2004|
|Oh, poor Fatty. He'll certainly be in need of a very *large* second breakfast now! I really like the development of Merry and Fatty's friendship. It's a very good set-up to the fact that they will become brothers (through marriage) in the future. I can imagine that Fatty is very protective of his little sister, and only a lad he approved of would be allowed near her! I also enjoyed one particular line very much - about Esmeralda looking more like Pippin's mum than Merry's. Makes sense with her being a Took and all!|
So very close, but I'll bet you'll be able to stretch it out for another few fabulous chapters! :)
Author Reply: It's already stretched out longer than *I* thought it would! 8-) I had no idea when I started it that it would go on for so many chapters, but the characters seem to have their own ideas. I do have a definite destination in mind, however.
|eiluj||Reviewed Chapter: 21 on 4/8/2004|
|Hi. I am muchly enjoying your three-dimensional Fatty Bolger, plus all the other details you are bringing into this story.|
One FYI: even if Fatty has never been across the Brandywine before, it's likely Merry's parents would have met him at some point. If not through a cousin's or acquaintance's wedding or funeral or party, then at the Great Smials at some Tookish holiday or get-together.
Saradoc, Esmeralda, and Fatty's father Odovacar are all great-grandchildren of the Old Took, which makes them second cousins (and Merry and Fatty, third cousins). [And if you look through the family trees, you will find that several other Bolgers have married into the Bagginses and Tooks. But not the Brandybucks so far, so maybe Fatty wasn't the only Bolger who didn't want to cross the river....]
Author Reply: I thought about it for a while before I decided they had not yet met. It is possible that their paths had just not happened to cross, or that Fatty was too young to remember if they had. They are of different generations, so even if she had met his parents, she might not have met him.
And yes, I do think the "not across the River" thing might very well be somewhat of a family trait. I've got a couple of ideas about that, too, now.
|Grey Wonderer||Reviewed Chapter: 21 on 4/8/2004|
|You are doing a wonderful job of blending the book with your fiction. I felt so sorry for Fredegar when he was frightened of the river, but Merry knew just the perfect thing to say. I can't wait for more.|
Author Reply: Thank you. That's the thing that's worried me most about this story.
I just keep finding out things about Fredegar--it's amazing, I really don't know where they come from, but they are just there.