Chapter Twelve: Exposed Truths

The feeling of the cool water on her skin was magnificent. It was refreshing, a relief from the heat of the day, and she ducked her head under to let it ride over her entirely, making her feel cleansed and buoyant and joyous. She relaxed and let her near naked body float on the water's surface as the water lapped at her skin, the exuberant lightness making her feel free and unencumbered. Her white cotton shift whirled about her form beneath her, glancing her skin as it moved, clinging to her body on the water's surface. It tickled and caressed her sensitive skin. Closing her eyes, she let the sun cast its glowing heat on her form, and the sensation of both heat and coolness made her jubilant to the glories of this place. For the moment, at least, Eowyn felt happy.

She caught movement in the corner of her eye and looked up to see her friend make her way to the water's edge. Arwen dipped a hand into the water and smiled. Shaking her head slightly, as if in answer to herself, the Elf-Queen looked up at the falls and squinted.

"Enter, Arwen. It's not going to get warmer by your wishes. The temperature is what it is. Enjoy it!" Eowyn called out in tease.

"Who is the Elf here?" Arwen asked jokingly. "I am the one who is not supposed to be bothered by cold." The dark-haired Queen proceeded to loosen the ties at her bodice, then looked up to explain. "I was merely wondering what state of undress one takes in these circumstances."

Eowyn laughed, and the sound echoed about her. "Well, one might take a near completely naked state of undress like me, if you please. I still have my chemise on, but that is all. I highly recommend it. But it is up to you, Arwen. You should do what feels right for yourself. You have no need to feel embarrassed as it is only I with you."

Arwen smirked at Eowyn as she proceeded to disrobe. She was wearing a simple gown that fit snugly to her body, but flared freely as she moved. It stopped at her ankles, exposing her bare feet. The dress was clearly made for days of travel and ease, though it was breathtaking for the flattery of its cut. Eowyn imagined the undergarments Arwen must endure to attain the illusion of such lithe form beneath the fabric. Her corset must be tied rather tight. There is no other way that Arwen's breasts could appear so full and her ribcage to appear so small, she thought with a small amount of satisfaction. She readied herself to depart the water, in case her friend might need aid in undressing. But as the Elven Queen unloosened the ties and stepped out of the dress, Eowyn was amazed to see the Elf wore no stays or supporting undergarments. Beneath was only her silken chemise and her drawers. Slowly, methodically, Arwen shed her garb completely, pausing to fold each meager items as she bared herself fully, much to Eowyn's surprise, and more so, to her distress. With the final relinquishment of a pin at her crown, the dark, upswept hair came tumbling down in a fluid line, nearly reaching Arwen's hips in one swoop. The Elven female stood on the rocky shore, completely bare and oblivious to the breathtaking spectacle of her physical entity in this setting. And worse yet to Eowyn's mind, Arwen was exquisite in this form. Better than that. Her body was absolute perfection.

Eowyn looked down on her own sad form floating about in the water. Her bobbing breasts, though nicely rounded (the only happy side-effect of pregnancy Eowyn was sure) were still rather small and flacid on her frame. Her hips and thighs were far wider than those of her friends, though her height and weight to the Elf were nearly the same. Happily, her shift hid the telltale pink and white marks that lined Eowyn's belly and thighs and told of three previous pregnancies. She moved her hand to her belly and touched the soft muscle tissue that was normally firm, and frowned at the bloating of her abdomen and the signs she was sure were becoming evident of her pregnant state. She sighed. At this moment, Eowyn could not help but feel a combination of extreme disappointment for her own body and pure jealously of her friend's as her mind tallied all the negatives and positives between the two.

Arwen laughed as she dipped into the chill of the water, unaware of the thoughts that worked through Eowyn's head. She splashed cold droplets in the lighter-haired woman's direction before she immersed herself face first into the depths of the pool. In the moment of silence that followed before the Elf emerged, Eowyn listened to the tumbling splashes of the falls ricocheting off the jagged rocks near the wall, sighing as she banished the dark thoughts from her mind. She gasped slightly when Arwen's face popped to the surface before her, but her smile met her friend's as the two laughed at her startling.

"Ah, it is wonderful," Arwen sighed as she arched back into the water, her breasts rising to the surface of the water. "I should never want to leave this place."

"So long have I felt that myself," Eowyn said, lolling back in the water too, pushing back her envy, choosing instead to enjoy her friend's company as she gazed up at the cliffs above their heads. "I love this place. If I could have, when we first married, I would have had Faramir build our house here in Ithilien. Of course, it is too remote, and would not have been an easy task. And now, with time, I realize I would not want to spoil the serenity. I think it serves nicely instead as a retreat, don't you?"

"A retreat? A retreat is a place to find personal answers, is it not? Then, yes, I do think this place seems a likely abode for that," the Elven Queen said thoughtfully spinning about. Eowyn watched her move about in this simple pleasure, but then she caught a slight wavering to that joy. Arwen's brow creased slightly, as if troubled by a deeper concern, and she stopped to look up again, fixing her gaze on the falls.

"If there are things that are bothering you, yes, it is," Eowyn answered, testing her friend, watching Arwen's distant eyes and saddened face to see if there was something she could offer in consolation to this mood.

And then the grim look washed away from the Elf, and was exchanged for one of curiosity. Inclining her head in the Rohirrim's direction, she asked, "Has it worked for you then?"

With surprise for the question, Eowyn flinched. "Pardon?" she countered, eyes widening, thrown by the unexpected nature of the query.

"You have been troubled, my friend. Has this retreat helped you?"

Eowyn paused, holding her breath as she absorbed this. She had not realized that Arwen read her so well and could perceive that she had been plagued by dark thoughts. It was not her intention to share her troubles, and she was taken aback by this invasion into her thoughts. She did not want to think about this thing that had been hampering her brain. Day and night it had brewed in her, from the time she had discovered her pregnancy. Only now, in the quiet and beauty of this space had she found peace enough to let it go for short moments of time. She felt sudden panic for the revelation that her worries were more visible than she had assumed, and quickly she turned away from her friend. "I know not what you speak of," she said, kicking her legs beneath her with more vehemence and she moved into shallower water. "I am fine. I have no troubles."

She heard the stirring of water as the other's body skimmed across the surface of the cerulean waters. She felt a hand to her shoulder as her friend caught up to her, and was surprised at the warmth of that touch. "I am sorry, mellon-nin," she heard the musical voice softly say. "I had no intention of harm. I am glad all is well with you, Eowyn. I must have misunderstood. You are happy for this pregnancy then?"

Eowyn flinched. No one but Faramir knew of her condition. No one. How could Arwen? Turning around to face her, she was greeted by the innocent smile of the Elf. Eowyn's face grew dark in her panic and anger. "No. You are wrong," she said stubbornly her temper flaring at the presumption of Arwen to intrude on something so personal. "There is no pregnancy here. I am not with child."

Arwen's face grew puzzled. She looked up and down Eowyn's submerged body as her brow did a dance in confusion and her head tilted to the side. Then she drew closer to her friend and placed a firm hand to her belly. Eowyn jumped at the unexpected touch, but did not pull back. "Yes, you are. Yes, I can tell," Arwen stated with quiet certainty. "Why do you deny this when you already know it is true?"

Eowyn's eyes did their own emotional dance as they took in the confusion and open compassion shown by her Elf friend. The light in those eyes bore into the depths of her soul and Eowyn suddenly felt exposed for the truth she had been hiding, denying, to everyone, herself most of all. Extreme guilt and sadness balled up in her chest, and for a moment, she felt a desire to lash out at the Elf for bringing these feeling to the surface. But she stayed her emotions, realizing it was not Arwen she felt anger towards, but herself. Eowyn had allowed this situation to occur, not Arwen, not Faramir, not her children. None but herself.

With a move towards forgiveness, Eowyn could see Arwen was only acting as a friend, confronting her, and consoling her if need be. How she knew, Eowyn could not fashion, and yet she did, and she was offering her the chance to talk about it. Arwen was the sounding board Eowyn so desperately needed, and in that expression Eowyn saw the Elf would not judge her. Looking at her, it was as if Arwen knew exactly the war she had been battling, and the merest glimpse from her friend had melted Eowyn's defenses. Under this scrutiny, her only choice was to admit what she had been denying. She was pregnant and she did not want to be. She was afraid and yet she hated herself for that fear. And she was ready to destroy that child to preserve the surety of the life she already knew.

A pentrating feeling clutched at her chest, her throat, her stomach, and the walls came crashing down. All the denial she had felt lay before her, and Eowyn realized she was naked without those defenses. Without realizing her true feeling, a complete lack of self-control came over her, and the Ithilien princess broke down and a sound passed out of her that she did not know she held. Like a repressed scream, a gut-wrenching sob broke away from her. Her throat tightly constricted, she was choking for air and she could get out no words, but the plea in her eyes said it all. She wailed without thought, the sound pulling out of her without effort, and her constricted feeling was released as she sobbed like a child.

In an instant Eowyn felt herself swept up into an embrace, the Elven Queen holding her close and with a gesture of gentle caring and consideration. Nudging her into the shore, Arwen guided her with an arm about her shoulder to the rock Eowyn had sat upon with Faramir the night before. Tears streamed down Eowyn's face, blurring her vision and Eowyn's head fell easily into the shoulder of Arwen's hold. "There now. There," she heard Arwen's whispered coos. Brushing Eowyn's hair and brow lightly with delicately soothing strokes, a long while and many tears passed before Arwen spoke again. And then she said softly, "No need to say it, my friend. I can guess. This is because of what happened to you with Theomund, is it not? You are afraid that it will happen again. You are afraid of the pain, of the possibility of death."

At that moment any words she might speak would come out in a quavering ramble, and so she looked upon Arwen's face through her bloodshot and swollen eyes and simply nodded. "Oh, Eowyn," Arwen said sympathetically as she pulled her friend near again in a rocking embrace.

After a few minutes more of this, Eowyn pulled away, noticing for the first time that Arwen sat completely naked with the sun shining down on her skin. She smiled at how innocently she had fallen against the female Elf, and at how the scene might have looked to an outsider. She gave her friend a wan smile before continuing her discourse. "I could die," she said simply, knowing it was not enough, but eager to hear what Arwen would say. Then after a long pause when nothing was said, she added, "I haven't decided yet if I will keep it."

Arwen nodded knowingly and let another few minutes pass as they looked up at the cascading falls, saying nothing in silent companionship.

At last Arwen spoke, breaking their reverie, "Have you thought about what she might want for you?"

Eowyn looked at her friend, complete confusion washing over her face. "Who?" It was a puzzling question, and Eowyn had no idea what the Elf was asking.

"The baby," Arwen answered plainly.

"You said 'she'," Eowyn replied, shaking her head, still confused.

"I did. Have you considered what she might want?" Arwen repeated, ignoring Eowyn's puzzlement.

"She?" Eowyn said, with a growing understanding, shaking her head yet again and letting her eyes wander away. "How do you know it is a 'she'?" Eowyn asked, darting her eyes to Arwen with deepening fear.

Arwen merely shrugged. "I just do. Just as I know you are with child. Forgive me, Eowyn. I have only lived with mortals a dozen years or so now, and I do not know many who have borne children. Except you perhaps, and we were not close enough in your earlier pregnancies for you to share them with me. Are you telling me that mortal women do not know of their child's sex whilst it is in the womb?"

Eowyn shook her head to confirm this fact while she digested the new knowledge Arwen had gifted her. She. Up until this moment, the thing in her womb had been an 'it'. Never had she considered anything beyond that, and even if she had allowed herself to think that far ahead, she would have probably decided the baby was another boy. But she? Suddenly the world was spinning a in completely different direction as the baby took on a personality all her own. A girl.

"You have not answered my question."

Eowyn's brow screwed up as thoughts on a girl-child invaded her mind. She shook her head as she tried to focus herself on the question. Frowning, she said, "Given choice, it...she would want to live. Do you not think it?"

"Are you so sure? If she knew and understood the potential danger to you, to your family, do you think she truly would want to do that to you?" Arwen asked with firm resolve.

Frustrated, Eowyn answered, "How would I know this Arwen? You are asking me to consider that she has an opinion here that she could express an opinion as if with an adult mind," the woman said, despairing in the hopelessness of the question.

"Not an adult mind, a mortal mind. For were it you and you knew someone you loved might die so that you would live, would you not consider forfeiting your own life to save them? A child has these strong feelings too, regardless of age. The love of a child for her mother is one of the greatest loves there is. So great, I think that she too would be willing to sacrifice her life to save her mother's."

"But she does not have a voice here. She is not able to express an opinion," Eowyn argued.

"And that is why I asked you what she might want for you. She cannot speak it, so you as her mother must decide what she would do if the opportunity were available for her to choose," Arwen explained.

Eowyn turned away, her brow still pressed in thought. And suddenly as if a great burst of light had flared about her, she understood. She realized then what Arwen was telling her.

She thought about her children, about Faramir, and about the depth of her love for all of them. About their love for her. If she had to choose between her life or theirs, she knew in a heartbeat she would give up herself to save them from any ill-fate. She knew this without doubt.

And then she thought of her own mother, and her feelings for her. To lose one's mother was a trauma beyond recovery, especially for a child. As a little girl, it had been her greatest fear, more frightening to her than even tales of dragons or orcs or Sauron himself. As a small girl she could imagine it, the loss, the desertion, being without that most important of all people, for as a child, her love for her mother was greater than all other things combined. The feeling of being cradled within her mother's arms still lived in her mind, though she was far too old ever to be held that way again. Yet she remembered the tender emotions of such a intimate expression and she knew her feelings were unconditional. And greater yet, she knew that her feelings were returned tenfold. Without question she knew had she been forced to choose her own life for her mother's, she would have given herself freely, despite her age.

Speaking aloud her thoughts, she said as if in a whisper, "She would sacrifice herself for me, wouldn't she? It's what I would have done for my mother. It's what Theomund and Léogel and Denomir would do were it put to them, I am certain." Tears rolled down her face as she considered this tragic loss of her sons for her own sake. A sob rocked her as she imagined having to go on without them.

"And you?" Arwen asked without emotion.

Eowyn looked hard into her friends face, the corners of her mouth dragging at the thoughts that rolled in her mind. "I would do the same for them. I would, absolutely."

"How do you know?"

"Because I love them. Because it is the least I could do for them. Because that is what I must do. Because there is nothing worse I can think of than seeing my children die" Eowyn's words trailed off as she pondered this thought. And then she steadied herself, and formed her resolve. She had already known, she realized. It just needed to be spoken. "She should not have to choose. There is no choice for her to make. The choice is mine." Then looking up at the Elf with steady eyes she said, "I choose not to do this."

And with that she knew she would love her baby girl with a fervor that extinguished any fears for herself. The anguish that sympathetic gesture wrought in her was enough for her to see it all differently. Now she saw it. Now she realized. A feeling she had not allowed came to her, but she admitted it now. Love.

Then looking at Arwen again, she broke, tears pouring down her face as a whirlwind of emotions rode over Eowyn. "Why did I not see it? This decision is not so hard to make. Oh, Arwen, how could I not have known. I've tried so hard to steel myself from it, but it has always been there. I will love this baby. I do love this baby!" She put her hand down to tenderly touch her own abdomen as she said is a raspy voice, "Should she be held in my arms or my womb, I do love her! She is mine! My child. She is not a 'thing' trying to come between me and my family. She is not trying to destroy me. Oh, but I see it now! I am sacrificing nothing to give her life because I see my life as such a small thing to pay for something so magnificent! And should I die, that will be fate's choice, not mine. Not my child's. Oh Arwen, why did I not see it before?"

"Because you were afraid. There is no shame in having fear," the Elf said with a small shrug and a smile.

Humbled, Eowyn scorned herself. "But there is shame in my actions. I was so close to letting fear make the decision for me. It almost conquered me. Faramir tried to tell me, but I would not listen. I had not even considered the alternatives. This pregnancy is risky, yes, but that is not a certainty. I may live. I want to live! But oh, if I had chosen the other, I don't think I could have, not with the guilt to haunt me."

"You would have come to the same conclusion on your own," Arwen said with assurance.

"But would I have realized I loved her?" Tears flowed down her face as she examined those possible outcomes.

"Perhaps not at first, but in time you would have come to feel love. It is not within you to hold your children in contempt, Eowyn. I know you well enough to say this. The feelings would have passed, and you would have found happiness still," Arwen said with a tone that echoed millennium-long wisdom.

A very heavy burden had been lifted from Eowyn's shoulders, and she looked to her friend and smiled in relief. Genuinely and with absolute gratitude, she smiled. Thanks to Arwen, she knew she would keep this baby. This little girl. My little girl, she thought.

Arwen could read Eowyn's thoughts, and blushed lightly. Then she said, "You know I envy you."

Eowyn was completely taken aback by the comment. She wiped away the former tears of misery shed felt and sniffed back her dripping nose and laughed with a snort. "Goodness, Arwen. Don't be a fool. Look at me. I am a mess. Why ever would you say a thing such?"

The troubled expression again returned to Arwen's face, and she looked quietly down at her hands as she spoke. "There are many differences it seems between the physical abilities of female Elves and female Humans. You are at least easily impregnated."

Eowyn laughed lightly. "I do not know many who would consider that a blessing. My troubles began over such a predicament."

"Ah, but you don't understand. How glorious it must be to know you can do this without consideration, without needing to give your mind's consent to have your body respond and bring forth young."

Eowyn looked again at her troubled friend and a thought occurred to her. "Arwen? Can you not have children?"

The Elf gave another weak smile and shook her head. "It is not that, although that would be such a simple thing were it true. There is more to my troubles than what you guess. Like you, I am faced with a choice. But my choice is one of my body's make, as well as my minds."

Eowyn shook her head. "I fear I do not understand."

"It matters not. It is something that Estel and I must face. Just know, my friend, that you should enjoy what you have. You are vital and alive in this state. Do you not know just how beautiful it is to see you like this, Eowyn?"

This time Eowyn laughed aloud, remembering her jealousy and chuckling in mirth at the foolishness of Arwen's words. "Oh, my friend," she said between a series of giggles and wiping away new tears from her eyes, "you have no idea what you are saying. Look at me," she said, standing and gesturing with a snort to her body under the clinging wetness of her chemise. Then pointing to Arwen as the Elf's body glowed in the golden sunlight, she said, "Look at you. Do you think I would not trade my body for yours at this moment?"

Arwen smiled a knowing smile and said, "You know you do not mean that." Then she stood, and held Eowyn's hands out to her sides as the Elf openly gazed upon Eowyn's body.

And there they stood, balanced upon Faramir's rock, two beautiful ladies, one fair and one dark, one clothed and one naked. They looked at each other as they really were, and Eowyn felt no shame. Then Arwen smiled and said, "You are beautiful, Eowyn, just as you are. Everyone should see you like this."

Graciously, Eowyn accepted the compliment and smiled back. "You are right, my friend, I would not trade. I am happy with what I have. I hope you too can find happiness and answers to your worries," she said as she folded Arwen into a hug.

And then she heard it.

"Ahem."

Eowyn nearly jumped out of her skin at the sound. A voice. A male voice.

Grimacing with fear, she glanced behind, seeing much to her horror "Aragorn!"

He was standing in the clearing, smirking as he watched the two women on the rock.

Instantly flushed with wretched dread for what he saw, Eowyn felt horribly naked. Actually, for all practical purposes, she was. The wet shift she was wearing clung tightly to her body, exposing every crease and curve to her body. The chill made her nipples stand up and the dress fibers were nearly invisible in their wet state on her body. Eowyn swung to the back of Arwen to hide herself from the view of this man. She felt guilty, as if shed been caught doing something she should not have, though she knew fully well she and Arwen were innocent of any wrongdoing. She felt her face blooming crimson as she watched the exchange between the King and the Queen, and she wondered exactly what they would say to one another. To her surprise though, Arwens response was far from the abashed embarrassment Eowyn felt. Though she knew not what she expected, the Elf's reaction that she next witnessed was far from it. Arwen merely smiled unashamedly. In fact, she arched a brow to her husband enticingly.

Aragorn too, did not look the least bit flustered at what he saw. Flirtatiously he gazed back at his wife, devouring her naked body with his eyes, and Eowyn knew he was barely aware of anyone else's presence. "Finding refreshment in the water I see," he stated obviously.

"It is marvelous, Estel, and the sun is so warm. The contrast is refreshing," the Elf Queen answered, then asked, "Would you care to join us?"

In her mind, Eowyn was screaming out, No, please no! Go away! Dont look at me! I do not wish you to be here! But Aragorn answered, "Yes, I think I will," as he began to remove his boots with a mischievous smile.

Just then, to her relief, or to her consternation (Eowyn was not sure) Faramir stepped into the clearing. He stopped dead in his tracks at the sight of the naked she-Elf before him, and to Eowyn's continued horror, he did not turn away. (At least not immediately, she decided later when she reflected on it.) And when he did, it was only because he saw Eowyn hiding behind Arwen's back. Caught gawking at the exposed beauty before him, his face flushed in a crimson that rivaled Eowyn's before he jumped and turned away. Hand to his eyes, she could hear the embarrassment in his voice as he faced the direction from which he had come, and said, "Sorryso sorry! I will, er, I will leave, you now" as he started to walk away.

Eowyn shreiked with a shrillness that rivaled a wounded Warg, unable to believe he was just going to leave her there as Aragorn continued to shed his clothing so openly. "FARAMIR!"

He turned back to meet her voice, but then realized he shouldn't as he was greeted again by Arwen's nakedness, and she could see him warring with himself as to how to respond to her, knowing that no matter which way he turned, he was in trouble. Turning backwards, then forwards, then backwards again, he made a comic sight, and even Eowyn broke into a small smile. In the end, he held his hands over his eyes as he faced her direction and meekly said, "Yesdear?"

Now barely able to contain her laughter, she said in her kindest voice, "Get a blanket for me, please, Faramir."

Grateful to be given somewhere else to look, Faramir scanned the ground for the stack of blankets the women had brought with them. He grabbed one and held it open to her as he turned his eyes away from the rock that she and Arwen stood upon.

Regaining her dignity, Eowyn turned to Aragorn, who was now loosening the ties on his trousers and said with regal formality, "Aragorn, if you will avert your eyes please."

Still smirking, for she was sure he knew of the embarrassment he seemed to enjoy causing her, the King suddenly slipped into his role as a gentleman. Sweeping into a bow, he said, "At your command, Lady," and then turned his back away from her. As was expected, his shoulders were rocking in mirth, and Eowyn had to concur his amusement. Even she was having a terrible time maintaining her dignity, the corners of her mouth fighting to smile. Still, she quickly removed herself. In three steps, she was wrapped in the blanket Faramir had held, and she grabbed her husband's hand tightly as she quickly led him away. Glancing back she saw Aragorn removing his leggings, and she glimpsed his bare buttocks as he charged into the water, chasing the playfully splashing form of the Elf who was his Queen. She heard Arwen laugh to his antics, and prudence led Eowyn away, saying to Faramir, "Come, my love. I am sure there is something in this cave that must require our attention."

As they entered the halls, they could no longer contain themselves, either of them, and both burst into gasping laughter, falling against one another and holding their sides as they wheezed to their convulsions of good humor. The sound of their sniggers and chuckles echoed throughout the caves and Faramir could not help but gaze on Eowyn with a light that shone brightly in his eyes.

She looked up at him, and saw him as if for the first time. He was so handsome, so kind, so gentle, so loving. She felt her heartbeat throb tightly in her chest as she looked upon his face. The urge to touch him overcame her, and she reached up and stroked his cheek, running her fingers down to his jaw, and brushing them through his light hair and around to his chest. With new appreciation and desire, she leaned back into the wall, pulling him into her and wrapping an arm about his waist. She looked deeply into his eyes, and the laughter in hers melted away into a smile, which melted again into a longing gaze. She softened her mouth into parted lips, and in her mind, she begged him to kiss her. She closed her eyes and reached up to meet him, a hand pulling his chin down, inviting his mouth to meet her lips, to touch her body, to taste her desire. And he was more than happy to comply.

****

A few steps more

Crunch

Ha! Three more steps and then

Crunch

Curses! Nothing in sight oh, oh, but wait there

Crunch

Amused with himself, Gimli looked up to see if he had evoked a response from the Elf yet. If not for the fun of watching Legolas stiffen at each harsh crackling sound, even Gimli might have grown annoyed. He plodded heavily over the dead brush on the field wondering vaguely how long this was going to take. Purposefully he trod, sidestepping the quieter path made clearly by the Elf. Any point in which he saw bramble or coarse brush, that is where he wandered, making sure his foot was planted firmly and with determination, doing his utmost to ensure the loudest possible noise. Aha, here was a very nice bed of dried leaves.

Crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch crunch

Legolas spun around, narrowing his eyes at his smaller companion, his annoyance at last getting the better of him. The Dwarf grinned, happy to see he had gotten a reaction. Legolas had been marching on in his introspective mood ever since they had departed the gypsy camp, and Gimli had tried everything he could think of to get his friend to open up to him, especially so since they no longer had the Men in their company. He felt sure Legolas might be a little more forthcoming without Aragorn or Faramir nearby, but that had not been the case. He was glad at last to see this little ploy had been effective in getting the Elf's attention.

"Please cease in that nuisance racket!" the Elf spat out.

Gimli's eyes went wide in pretended innocence. "What racket?" he asked as he twisted the heel of one foot ever deeper into the leaves. Crrrruuunnnnccchhh. The leaves pulverized beneath his foot.

Legolas' hands balled up into fists as his expression went dark with controlled anger. "Enough! Whatever it is you want from me, you shall have it, but please, this has gone on for too many miles. Stop disturbing the peace of this forest and provoking my mood!"

"Provoking your mood? Ha! If anything, I have been trying to alter your mood. And yet you do not budge. I was beginning to wonder if you were ever going to give. Or at least try to lead me to a place where there was no more dry brush present," Gimli said with a glib chuckle as he sat on a large rock that presented itself in their path.

Legolas scowled, "I would have considered leading you off a cliff, but even then I suspect you would have found means to annoy me. I think you were really born an Orc, Gimli. Your ability to torture me rivals any foul device of that race." But he said this with a small smile and Gimli could see the Elf was not really all that angered by the Dwarf's provocations. Legolas squatted before the stone, looking infinitely comfortable in this position. Gimli marveled at the flexibility of the Elf's body, and he could think of few times when his friend had ever actually complained of any aches or pains to his lean form.

"You have my attention, Dwarf. Now what is it you seek from me," Legolas said curtly. Perhaps Gimli had misjudged. It appeared the Elf's mood had not recovered that much after all.

"Spare me the effort of presenting an interrogation, Legolas. I simply wanted a moment to speak with you," Gimli said with a shrug.

Legolas sighed. "This is pointless. There is nothing for me to tell you."

"You do not know what I would ask?"

"I know you would press me on personal matters that do not concern you. I know you would pry into my mind when I care not to open it for scrutiny. I am fine Gimli. Leave it at that. I suffered no harm."

Gimli knew better. He had witnessed his friend's return to consciousness in a readily weakened state, only to find moments later a completely unexplained recovery. Worse yet, Legolas had refused to talk of it, merely shrugging it off. Gimli had many theories for Legolas' fall, none of them good, but to Gimli's consternation, the Elf offered no solutions. It was time for Gimli to show his annoyance. He would not let his friend brush his fears away. He jumped to his feet. "I think there is much to say and much that you need share! Why do you think Aragorn allowed us now to seek out on our own the waterfall of which you have been boasting? Surely he would have preferred that you seek rest in our camp. He has concerns, and yet he knew I wanted a moments peace with you and he granted it! Do not fight me on this, Elf! I offer aid."

Legolas' mood shifted ever more. "Why should I not fight you when you conspire against me? I do not ask for aid. What is there that I could say that will assure you all is well? " The elf's voice was terse.

A moment passed before Gimli reached up to place a well-meaning hand on the Elf's back, his Dwarven temper schooled to calm. "I mean you no harm, friend. It is only that I have worries. Appease them and I promise you I will bother you no more. Tell me what you are think on this and I will believe that indeed all is well."

Legolas sighed as if worn down by Gimli's persistence. He sat down on the ground and brought his knees to his chest as he said in surrender, "Very well, Gimli. As you will it."

The Dwarf looked at Legolas with sympathetic eyes as he too sighed. It had been a long day. Then he said, "Let us start with what happened back there at the camp. Has any memory of it returned to you? Aragorn suspected he thought perhaps it might be that you suffered sea-longing. That theory causes me fear."

"You have fear because the sea plagues me? It plagues me always, Gimli," Legolas said sadly.

"But was it that that caused your illness, Legolas? Was it the sea that brought your fall? I've never seen you act that way before."

Legolas frowned as he looked at the ground, then grimly he looked up to meet the Dwarf's steady gaze. He answered in a soft voice, "I have no memory of it. I am sorry I can do nothing to allay your fears. In that, Aragorn is correct, it is like the sea-longing. For whence afflicted, I have little memory then of what I say or do under that condition."

"But Aragorn inferred that you were behaving in a way that is like a later stage of the illness. Know you of what he means? Could this be true? Has it progressed so quickly for you?"

"I would not know, Gimli. You would have to ask someone who has seen it of recent in me. But I can say I know this. How I feel after an assault of that affliction and how I felt today were two entirely different things. As poorly as I felt on my awakening, it was not the same as the after-effects of sea-longing."

"So it was not sea-longing!" Gimli said in eager discovery.

"I did not say that," Legolas countered. "I only said I did not suffer as I typically do after an attack. That does not rule out sea-longing. Merely the typical symptoms."

"Yes, yes, yes. 'Go not to the elves' I have heard it all before," Gimli grumbled and paced before Legolas, focusing his attention on the positive point made. "It either is or it is not. If the symptoms do not match, it very well may not be the disease. What would cause this then?" Looking down at his friend he said, "You were crying out about smoke."

Sighing with exasperation, Legolas said, "So you said, yet in this I have no memory either. I have been trying to remember" But despite his protest and shaking head, his brow knit in concentration as if he were pondering something. Then he looked up. "And yet it bothers me"

"What is it?" asked Gimli stepping closer.

"I did not remember saying the words, but I do remember tasting it. I distinctly recall the taste of smoke in my mouth upon waking," Legolas said with consideration. Almost instantly the Elf's eyes became lost in thought again.

"There is more," the Dwarf read.

"Yes, the girl. Kattica. It has been puzzling me. She touched me when we left and I felt something. Or rather, I saw something," Legolas said staring vacantly ahead, absently rubbing the place on his arm she had touched. The memory of his encounter clearly played again in his mind as he relived the thoughts.

"What was it?" Gimli asked.

"I saw myself being attacked."

"Attacked?" the Dwarf asked, alarmed.

"It was smoke yet it was an unnatural smoke. It came at me as an apparition of a serpent."

"A snake?" the Dwarf gasped.

"Aye, Gimli. But I did not take it for truth before, and I do not take it now. It seemed more like the carryover of an Elven dream then something of reality. And beyond the memory of that vision, I do not recall anything of smoke. Do you?" Legolas said, arching an eyebrow at his friend.

Gimli growled low to himself, "No. No I do not, but I am not so willing to give this up. What do you make of the girl's touch?"

Legolas arched a brow at his friend as he answered, "She told me she was a witch apprentice to the old woman. Mayhap she does have some power in 'sight', as I have heard it called."

Gimli gasped in realization, "Witchery!"

"Nay, Gimli! I can see what you are thinking but you are wrong. I watched the girl at work. She cast no spells. She is not a true witch in the sense that you are thinking," Legolas defended.

"I mean not the girl but the old woman. She touched you before you fell into unconsciousness. Do you not find that suspicious?" the Dwarf asked with wide eyes.

Legolas laughed. "She is a healer, my friend. Healers touch. I imagine Aragorn would have done so too. And per your tale, you were holding me, so you as well touched me. Did Faramir lay hand to me also? I am starting to feel as if the entirety of the camp prodded me in one way or another," Legolas grinned, mocking his fall in an attempt to lighten the mood of the Dwarf.

But Gimli would not budge from his apprehensions. "I think there is more here than you might see. First the brothers say they seek an Elf, then they correct themselves saying they seek only a place where the Elves live, yet they know not that they travel in such a realm. Do you not think they would have heard tale of Ithilien in their travels? Surely they are not so isolated that they never pass rumor to those they encounter. Rare though Elves be, they are not so rare that traders from the lands surrounding Long Lake to the Fords of Isen, do not know of your presence in Ithilien since the end of the war. It is no secret, your coming here. The colony of Doro Lanthiron is widely known and sought."

Legolas nodded, "I agree. It is strange. I had dispute with this claim myself, but their explanation of following their elder's guidance seems plausible enough, I would guess. As for their lack of knowledge for the territory, I would have to guess they keep most to themselves. They are recluses. That they seemed very startled to encounter me tells me they know little of Elves. I would not expect that if they were truly in pursuit of an Elf. And if they did indeed know to where they had traveled, do you not think they would be laying in ambush to capture me? Look now, we are free. If an Elf were so dire to their plans or needs, why would they have let me go so easily? I was unconscious. I was offering no resistance. Were there truly evil, it is possible they could have overpowered you and done what they wished to me."

"They would have had my weapon to face had they tried," the Dwarf growled.

"Fair enough," Legolas laughed, "but the point is they did not attack. If witchery were at hand, then it was poorly executed, my friend, for this Elf still walks free."

"I feel not so sure. You were not there," he grumbled, then looked up with a half-smile at the arched brow directed at him by the Elf. "Or at least you were not there in a coherent state. I do not trust the old woman, though I have nothing to prove foul play on her part." Then he sighed a heavy breath of resignation, "Mayhap it was sea-longing."

Legolas watched his disheartened companion, then quietly he said, "I am sorry Gimli, but I told you there was nothing to tell here."

"Not true," Gimli said quickly, turning his gaze again on his friend, "There is still a great deal to be told. Tell me of the sea-longing, Legolas. We have not talked on it for a very long time."

Legolas shook his head sadly. "Ah, Gimli, why would you want to know this? Will it assure you in some way that indeed it was that? Very well then, my friend. Suffice it to say that a day does not go by that I do not suffer for it in some way. Shall I tell you that I hear its call incessantly, even in my dreams? Would it make you feel better to know that there are times when I am certain I will go mad for her droning song? Can you be happy to know that sometimes days go by when I cannot remember what occurred, only to find out later I was locked in the sea's trance? Will you be happy to know that this little conversation makes me sense it even more clearly? Tell me, Gimli, are you now confident it was not this that I suffered in that camp?"

"Nay. I am not. But I am glad you have told me of it. It very well may have been the sea-longing then. As your friend I will be more prepared for it. And for your sake now, I will let it go. Still, I do not like what happened in that camp. We should avoid it henceforth."

"I concur," Legolas said with a small nod.

"But I do have one other thing that concerns me in this matter," Gimli went on.

Legolas smiled a long-suffering sigh. Sometimes it seemed the Dwarf was never satisfied. "Yes, Gimli. What is it?"

"You were told once, by a wise Elf or two, that rest was important in staving off the effects of this illness.* And you were fairly willing to go along with their opinion at that time. But it has not escaped my Dwarven sight that you have not slept well of late. Not last night, certainly, in the cave, or even the night before in the land of your people. And while you may say you were very much asleep after a ah er a night out in the city, I would not call "thissuch" restful or healthy."

Legolas winced at the memory of his night of drunken pursuit and Gimli's prod at his foolery.

Gimli went on, "And even before that, I know you did not rest upon arrival in Minas Tirith. You have evaded sleep, my friend. Why?"

The Elf shook his head in answer to the question. "You miss nothing, so it seems."

"My eyes are sharper than you may think. What say you, Legolas?" Gimli said with a kindly smile.

Legolas scowled, but in a friendly manner he answered, "I think there are some things you should turn your eyes away from, Orc-child. I may have been troubled of late, but I will assure you it has nothing to do with the sea-longing. More than that I would rather not share, especially considering you are a Dwarf."

Gimli bristled at the comment, "I will assume then that it is my race that keeps you from telling me more."

The Elf shook his head and smiled meekly, as if realizing the brunt force of his words. "If it is any consolation, I have not yet found it in me to share this with Men either," Legolas said in an effort to appease.

"You said yet. As if you were indeed considering sharing it sometime with Men. Aragorn and Faramir, I would assume. You would do this before you would share it with your dearest friend?" Gimli sulked beneath scornful brows.

"I fear this is true, Gimli," Legolas sighed, confessing.

Clearly hurt, Gimli asked, "Why would you tell them and not me?"

Legolas winced, shifting in the spot he sat. He pulled his legs in tighter to his chest and answered in apologetic tones as he lowered his gaze, "I do not mean to insult you, Gimli. Truly, it is not an opinion I hold, yet it would not be the right thing to do in my position. While I may trust you, I am not sure my people would appreciate my sharing our problems with you."

"Aha! So it is the Elves of Doro Lanthiron we are discussing! The parameters of my quest narrow," Gimli said with a measure of glee, a raised finger pointing into the air.

Legolas scowled. "Ai, I am a fool! Curse you, Gimli, for prying this much from me! From here on, I will marshal myself to not speak further."

Legolas quickly rose and began to storm off, intent now on only reaching the falls. Gimli chuckled as he followed, taking quick steps to keep up with the Elfs pace.

"Very well, Elf. Do not speak to me then. Let me see if I have enough of the puzzle pieces to put this together on my own," he announced. Gimli chuckled to himself, proud that he was able to decipher as much as he had. Then he began to ponder his thoughts, speaking aloud as he did. "Something your people would not want to share with a Dwarf. Your people, the ones who would have authority to tell you if it was prudent to deal with Men and not Dwarves. Those would be your minister and councilors, so that would make it a government issue." He looked up to see if there were any response from the Elf, but faced only the straight back of his friend. He could see Legolas meant not to tell. Very well. "Hmm, that would make sense as you are the lord of your people. Of course it is a government issue. Very well then, why would you seek out the help of Gondor effectively, as Aragorn and Faramir lord that kingdom, but not seek the help of the Dwarves." Gimli snorted, "Well, that is obvious is it not? Despite all, there is still not much love among your people for Dwarves. And yet, you make it sound as if you could lose your position if you asked, no even mentioned, the need for aid from a Dwarf. That is a pretty severe punishment, is it not?" he asked the silent back. "So the need must be something your people would not wish the Dwarves to know. Something we have in great capacity perhaps?" Gimli saw Legolas stiffen at that and knew he was getting closer. "Yes, yes, that would make sense. So what do Dwarves have in wealth that the Elves of Doro Lanthiron do not. Hmm. That is not easy to answer as our lifestyles are so very different. Perhaps if I focus on the things that would put a government in need. Yes, that might do it. Commerce? No, that is doubtful. The Elves already have a good trade agreement going with Gondor. Rohan as well as parts as far as Belfalas I have heard. Security? Not even plausible in these times. Besides, the elves are too great of fighters. Population? Well, there is not a shortage of Elves that I can see. If anything there are too many. Ha! At times, it seems all the Elves of middle-earth are flocking to Doro Lanthiron. Why I would ventureLegolas?" Suddenly a thought coalesced clearly in Gimli's mind. "That is it, isn't it? Your population. It is growing too much. That is it!" He did not get a response, but he did not need one. His mind was racing ahead. "I see it now. Overpopulationyour economy cannot keep up! And the Elves would not want the Dwarves to know they could not maintain their growth. The Dwarves, who sit on their hoards of wealth, would find a great deal of amusement at that. Oh yes, that would make perfect sense," he said with a grin. He was very pleased with himself for unraveling the mystery. He looked to his friend for the praise he felt he merited. "I got it right, did I not?Legolas? Legolas?"

Legolas stopped in his tracks, and he lowered his head in defeat. His shoulders hunched and his fists balled, and Gimli raced around to see what expression he might find. He was not pleased. Legolas face had grown white and his eyes were closed. His jaw was locked tightly into a fierce grimace.

Gimli was suddenly struck dumb. Realizing now he had gone too far, pried too much, he tried to make up for it with words. "Really, it is nothing of which to be ashamed. No fault of your own. How could you have known Doro Lanthiron would become a haven for the Elves? How could any have known? You intended it to be a simple colony. Small. A resting place before you set off on your journey across the sea. And yet it's location to the sea must have been an enticement also to your people. What with Galadriel's departure, and Elrond's as well, it should be no surprise that the Elves of middle-earth are choosing now to leave. Doro Lanthiron seems a nice enough place to settle, to say their last goodbyes, I imagine. No doubt you had not anticipated such an increase so quickly. If you would ask me, I would guess your colony has grown three times its size in the last half dozen years," the Dwarf rambled, and even Gimli realized how ridiculous he sounded as he prattled on. What did Legolas call that sort of condition? Brethilitis?** He shook his head as his face reddened. It was an unusual thing to happen among the succinct Dwarves.

"Three and a half," Legolas muttered through gritted teeth.

"Three and a half what?" the Dwarf asked, pulling himself back to what he had said and finding instead confusion over his discomfiture.

"It has grown three and a half times its expected size. If you are going to mock me, Gimli, get your facts correct," Legolas said as his eyes opened to narrowed slits.

"Nay, friend. I do not intend to mock you. Well, perhaps only a little, but no, Legolas. I see this is causing you pain. I will not make you endure more," Gimli said, regretting that he had ever attempted to find this information. Then with quiet sympathy he asked, "How bad is it?"

Legolas looked crushed. He sank to the ground and sat with knees drawn up, his head bowed. "Most of my people do not realize the dire circumstances we have come under, and they shall not if I can help it. It is bad enough, my friend. I have been considering asking Gondor to extend a loan. I am certain Aragorn and Faramir would be willing, in as discreet a manner possible even, yet it still eats at me and I do not think I can do it. Yet, if we cannot find another way, it may come to that."

Gimli could see now exactly how troubling this was to his friend. "It stabs at your pride, does it not," the Dwarf said, a hand to his friend's back.

"Imagine yourself in my place. The Dwarves would be no happier with this than the Elves. We have never had need to rely upon Men before. We have always been self-reliant," Legolas answered looking deeply into his friend's face.

"Hmm. Yes. Yes, I see what you mean. Have you considered other alternatives?"

"Such as"

"Going to the other Elves"

"Imladris and Lothlórien grow more and more dim with each passing day. It is only a matter of time before Elladan, Elrohir, and Celeborn too pass over the sea. Their populace grows sparse, and those places do not linger in the riches they once did. And while it too wanes, Greenwood is the only other thriving realm remaining on middle-earth worthy of asking. It would mean asking my father. You have met my father, Gimli. How do you think he would favor such a request?" Legolas said with a sideward glance and a frown.

"Not in a way anyone would really like, I'm sure," the Dwarf agreed.

"And yet, my personal feelings in this do not matter. For the sake of my people, I am sure that will be the next step I take," Legolas said, his brow creasing in new worries. "The problem is, we have no idea when the flow of Elves into this land will end. As astute as he is at business matters, Thranduil will not be pleased to receive a proposal that is so open-ended. It is my hope that he will show compassion before considering any gains."

Gimli considered this as he answered with the thoughts his heart yielded, "He is a father as well as a leader, Legolas. He will be compassionate."

"Aye, but I do not think he will settle our needs completely. I think he resents the colony, for many reasons. Not least of which is that I help rule it in a realm of Men. I am sure he will be slightly bitter and will be stingy in his aid. It is not to be helped. There shows no sign of an easing and I have little choice. And while our woodcraft and wines are selling well, the exchange we have earned is not enough to maintain this continued growth. We have far exceeded our projections. It is only a matter of time before our capital runs out."

"Can this be corrected?"

"Most assuredly. With time. In the vineyards, we have plans to put in new vines this fall and spring, which will eventually triple our production. Yet it may be years before the grapes are established enough to produce a worthy product. We have numerous craftsmen and artists of varying trades that have joined us, and we are doing what we can to market their wares. Doro Lanthiron may well become a trade port before we are done, but still this takes time to establish. And unfortunately, we do not have much time." Legolas laughed, caught up in the irony of that thought before going on. "Strange, is it not, that a race never bothered by such a concept as time is now plagued by it? By this winter, we may well see the negative financial results of our expansion, and I think it may hit us hard. We do not have food enough in our stores to feed all our people without using outside sources. Our housing is tight. And we have many building needs we cannot keep up with, despite the increase in labor."

"I do not suppose you could raise taxes?"

"Such a thing is foreign to Elves, Gimli. You know this."

"Maybe the Dwarves can do something to help."

"I do not think my people would accept a loan," Legolas said, shaking his head.

"I did not offer one," the Dwarf answered smartly.

"You cannot mean charity?" Legolas asked with an astounded laugh.

Gimli smirked, but answered seriously. "Knowing my people, it would be more than a small feat to accomplish, Ill grant you that."

Legolas lost his sense of humor in this as his brow creased in anger. "And it would be completely unacceptable to even consider among mine!"

"Perhaps if it were a gift from one friend to another?" the Dwarf offered shyly, abruptly changing the mood.

"You do not have that kind of personal wealth, Gimli," Legolas sighed.

The Dwarf frowned, "That bad then? Well, what about a trade on goods for services."

"What did you have in mind?" Legolas inquired, slightly interested, an eyebrow cocked.

"Mayhap a trade of capital for the promise of take on future wine sales."

"That is a loan, Gimli," Legolas grinned largely.

"I know, but I am running out of ideas, Elf!" the Dwarf bellowed.

Legolas laughed as he began to rise. "Enough then, Gimli. Let us not think on it further. It gives me a pain in my head if I consider it too long."

Gimli was aghast. "That is it? You will let it go at that? How can you?"

"Apparently I cannot as you have pointed out. I believe it was countless nights of lost sleep that prompted this discussion. I surrender for now, Gimli. That is all. We will not solve this today."

"Very well for now. But it will be resolved somehow before this trip is done, Elf. I will not rest until we have found a way," Gimli said with surety.

Legolas' laugh was like music, and it heartened the Dwarf to hear it. "Has that not been my role, Gimli? Ah, well, at least one of us will be sleeping."

"Aye, you are right. We will not speak of it more. Today. Perhaps we will fall into a solution that will resolve all these worries tomorrow," the irked Dwarf responded.

"Let us hope so, Gimli," Legolas said, the smile still on his face but sadness creeping into his voice. "Now, if there are no other questions, do you think we could continue on our way?" He looked to the sun to see the days passing.

"I will follow your lead, friend." Gimli said, with a merrier tone. He truly was pleased to know now the heart of his friend's worries. Perhaps they could not solve them now, but they would. He was sure of it. And so they set off once again.

"Gimli?" Legolas called as he marched forth through the field. Gimli raised a brow at his friend's half-turned face. "Now that I have told you what it is that troubles me, will you share something of yourself?"

Warily, the Dwarf answered, "That would depend. What is it you wish to know?"

"What do you intend to do with that halberd?"

Gimli laughed loudly, stopping dead in his tracks as he did so. Looking up at his weapon, then back at the Elf, he considered, then said, "Shall I give you a demonstration?"

Legolas smiled eagerly. "Please do," he said.

* By this I am referring to a conversation Legolas had with Elladan in Chapter 4, "Confessions Before Battle" of my first fic, "Cry of the Gull." Shameless plug there, I admit.

** Sorry, but I couldn't resist mentioning Brethilitis, and I've been desperately trying to find a place to sneak it in ever since Treehugger said it would be okayfor me to use it. See her story, "In the Hall of the Wood Elf King," and its follow-up fic, "Once Upon a Time in Hollin," to learn more on this very tragic affliction.