Outside, the streets were already dark, at just four pm on a wet December day on Edinburgh’s Royal Mile. Inside, the crowds of primary children and their tired looking teachers, curious tourists, and a few shoppers driven inside by the rain, were waiting expectantly at the Scottish Story-telling Centre.

The compere smiled at all the visitors.

‘Welcome to the Scottish Story-telling centre, for the first of our Advent events, stories set in and around the theme of Christmas and the Winter Solstice. Today we have a young man making his first appearance here. I don’t know much about him but he tells me that he is both a story-teller and a musician, and that he is going to tell us a new story. We always try to help up-and-coming talent, offering a supportive and warm environment for people who lack experience. I know that all of you (at this she looked closely at the school-children) will do the same. So please welcome Darren.’

The storyteller sat on an old wooden chair. He had on a rather tired-looking brown woollen coat, double breasted, done tightly up against the Edinburgh cold, while his throat was further protected by a long maroon scarf. A black knitted hat was pulled tightly over his head: a few brown curls escaped over his visible ear-lobes. Despite his apparent youth, his voice (accented? not Scots) carried across the room when he started to speak. And this is the story he told:

Once upon a time, long after the Elves had left mortal lands and the last of the dragons were dead, but still a long time ago, there was a King who wanted to live forever.

At the time of this story, the King had lived and reigned in his small kingdom for over thirty years. His kingdom was surrounded by larger countries, empires even, but by cleverly asking making friends of first one and then another he had managed to keep it independent for all those years. All his friends, his people, and other rulers said that the King was indeed very clever and the King himself agreed with them. ‘Well I am very clever,’ he said ‘no-one could run things as cleverly as I can. What would happen if I wasn’t here? Anyone else would make mistakes, and the Kingdom would be taken over. I have to stay alive as long as possible. I’m too important to die’

How did the King make friends? Well for one thing, his land was beautiful to visit, and the King’s House the most beautiful of all. The land was hot, so people could wear light clothing, but in the King’s Palace and gardens there was plenty of shade. Many stories were told by those who had visited the King’s Palace, about the buildings, the gardens, and the King himself. There were Olive trees and Lemon trees and enormous bushes of Laurel and Rosemary, so the evenings were filled with smells of fruit and spices. Visitors who came to the Palace would bring gifts to the King, often gold, spices, or fabrics. The King liked to keep cool by wearing the finest clothing, Silk carried by traders all the way from far China. The King loved his fine clothes. ‘After all, he said, I am King. I’m too important to sweat’

And the King did indeed look magnificent in his fine clothing. He was tall, broad of chest, yet slender in the waist. He was proud that he could eat whatever he liked, yet still keep his imposing figure. Like many people who kept slim without trying, he privately felt rather superior to plump people. ‘Look at those revolting bulges on that fat merchant’s stomach,’ he said to himself, ‘and those stupid puffy red cheeks’. The King was also proud of his handsome face with pronounced cheekbones, wide green eyes, and neatly trimmed beard. ‘After all,’ he said, ‘I am King, I’m too important to look ugly’.

The King had many talents. He could sing, and tell stories, and delighted in conversation. Wise men and clever men would come to his Palace and he would talk with them until the hours of darkness passed and the clear lights of the stars above faded into the grey dawn. And then he would ride or hunt in the morning, for he had a stable of black and grey horses of such beauty it could almost stop your heart to look at them. The King, slim as he was, was still athletic and strong and could ride for hours at great speeds on these horses. ‘After all,’ he said ‘I am King and I’m too important to ride slowly‘.

Another thing was that this King was very rich. He gathered money from the people of his country, and used it carefully. The King did not spend a lot of money – some on his palace and his clothes. But he liked people to give things to him. Although he received visitors from foreign lands, he himself tried not to travel too much. ‘Travelling is expensive, he said, and why should I leave when everything I have is so perfect here in my Palace? I would have to give gifts to the people I stayed with, and that’s really the wrong way round. ‘After all,’ he said ‘I am King, I’m too important to give gifts to other people’.

Now the King, despite being so handsome and wise, did have a few problems. One of his brothers had tried to depose him and steal his crown (not to mention his fine clothes and beautiful palace), but the King found out what his brother was trying to do and executed him. This made the brother’s sons, his own nephews, unhappy and the King was forced to execute them too. In fact, just to be on the safe side, he executed all his other brothers and all their sons as well. ‘After all,’ he said, ‘I am King, all the King that my people need, and I’m really too important to be bothering about brothers and their plots’.