Disclaimer: They're not mine. Except for a shadow of Pippin that is part of my soul and a shadow of Merry that is part of my Mer. But I don't think those count.

Friends You Can Trust

Chapter Four: Do As You Think Best
In which Freddie is given a scare, Pippin has no pipeweed, and a conspirator is gained

"I dunno, Pip, I think that if you're out of leaf that's your problem." Merry sat, smugly puffing away on his pipe, with Pippin next to him trying to look as pitiful as possible. They had asked me to meet them at the Plow and Pitchfork to discuss something important. Pippin's lack of pipeweed was certainly not what they meant, but as they were buying the ale, I decided to let them take their time.

"How about you, Freddie?" Pippin tried to hit me up. "Have you got any extra pipeweed on you?"

"No, sorry Pippin." I chewed on the mouthpiece of my empty, unlit pipe.

"Don't you remember, my dear Took? Fatty's trying to give up smoking." Merry said with a twinkle in his eyes. Using my childhood nickname (though affectionately) did not, at the moment, improve my view on my attempt.

"Bah." I snorted. "'Trying' being the important part. But it's more trying when I'm trying, if you know what I mean. Really it's closer to 'failing miserably'." I stared at my pipe for a moment and sighed. "Oh, eggshells, Merry, just give us both some leaf." Merry laughed and handed his pouch to me.

"Glad to see you can hold to your resolves, Fredegar."

"Go suck eggs, Meriadoc." I replied with a grin. We fell silent then, alternately nursing mugs of good South Farthing ale and puffing on our pipes. Pippin fidgeted in his seat.

"So," Pippin said finally, "We need to ask you for a favor."

Ah-ha, so that was it.

"I'm sorry to say that I'm quite low on money," I commented.

"Oh, no," Merry said quickly. "It's not like that. It's...well..." he paused for a moment. "Well, it started with Bilbo's adventure. He picked up, in one way or another, a magic ring that turns the wearer invisible. When he left the Shire again, at the Birthday Party, he left the ring to Frodo."

"Ah," I nodded. "So that was how he disappeared?"

"Yes. But now..." Merry trailed off, apparently unsure of what to say.

"Well, you see, Freddie," Pippin picked up, "Mr. Gandalf has found out some things about the ring since then. It was made by the Dark Lord thousands of years ago, but he was beated and the ring got lost, and then Gollum found it and had it for hundreds of years before he lost it and Bilbo found it, but now the Dark Lord is trying to find it a'cause he wasn't really beated and now it has to be destroyed so Frodo's taking it out of the Shire!" Pippin ran out of breath, finally.

"Frodo's going to Rivendell, maybe even to Mordor, and Sam Gamgee's going with him." Merry said seriously. "And Pippin and I are going, too, even though Frodo doesn't know it yet."

"In short, we want you to join our conspiracy!" Pippin declared, slamming his mug down for emphasis and sending most of his ale sloshing down the sides. I took a deep breath and a long drink of ale. I was not the type of Hobbit that would find it exciting to go on an adventure, like Merry and Pippin, though it wasn't too bad hearing about them.

"Well," I said after a moment's deliberation, "I can't say I'm keen on the idea, but Frodo is my friend. If he's going into danger, he should have friends alongside him." I took another deep breath. "When do we leave?" To my immense surprise (and slight indignation), Merry and Pippin (after gaping a moment) burst into - of all things - laughter.

"Oh Freddie!" Merry chuckled, "Oh dear, brave Freddie! We're not asking you to come with us." My relief was immediately evident to my two friends.

"What would you have me do, then?" I asked, a small laugh bubbling out of me.

"Stay in Frodo's house." Merry explained, still laughing quietly. "Keep up the impression that he's still there for as long as you can. That's all."

"That's all, indeed, Master Brandybuck," I sighed good-naturedly. "And you had me thinking you were asking me to leave! Honestly!"

"Indeed, Master Bolger," Merry mimicked my tone. "But you rose to the ocassion, if I may say so." he sent a smoke ring into Pippin's face, starting an all-out smoke war between the three of us.

"If you lads would pause in your competition," one of the innkeeper's daughters came over with another round, "Perhaps I could get you something else?"

"Ah, no thank you, Miss Diamond." Merry smiled cheerfully at the lass. "How fares your sister?"

"Oh, she's doing fine. But a bit large - she can't even bend over!" Diamond giggled. "It won't be long, now."

"Well, give your family my regards."

"Indeed. Good evening Mr. Merry. Mr. Pippin." She smiled shyly at Pippin and strolled back to the kitchen. Pippin watched her go with a sort of dazed look on his face.

"When did Dia get so pretty?" he asked. Merry and I just laughed. Merry then raised his mug with a mischievious smile.

"To conspiracies!" he said. "And pretty lasses!"

"Cheers!"

((Yay! I finally typed this and I'm SO glad! Many thanks to my Nenna for helping me with spelling, as I sometimes have questions. Or, as my beta, Wil, said: "Warning! The server to Nenna: Walking Talking Spelling Guide, may be slow or unavailable as currently the bandwidth has been exceeded due to an overwhelming demand for service."

Very funny, Mer.))