A while back I wrote a story called "Many Happy Returns" which was filled with lots of little birthday stories.  There are a few referrences to that story in this one, but nothing that would make it necessary to have read "Many Happy Returns" before reading this one.  Like all of the other stories in this group, this is a one chapter tale that stands on its own.

G.W.     10/04/04

The Wedding Table

This was starting to hurt a bit. The pressure on his wrists was cutting off the feeling in his fingers. Every time he tried to get to his feet the rug slid out from under him and left him back where he had been before. That crazy Brandybuck was responsible for this and if he managed to get out of this mess, he would repay him twice over.

It had been a very disagreeable day all around. It had been raining off and on since they’d arrived. Everything was wet and mud was everywhere. This was his first visit back to the Great Smials in several months. He and Merry had been living in the little house in Crickhollow. Their last visit had been for Pippin’s thirtieth birthday. During that trip to the Great Smials, Merry had been seriously injured and had spent most of the visit in bed.

He and Merry had come to the Great Smials to spend several weeks visiting his family. It was his sister Pervinca’s birthday tomorrow and they were planning a very large party. Everyone at the Smials was busy with decorating and cooking. Merry had other things on his mind and so Pippin had followed his older cousin out to the barn to watch Merry work on his latest experiment.

Merry was constantly trying to make something from those blasted herbs and plants that he was always fussing with. The latest effort was paste of all things. Merry had been working on this concoction for weeks before they left Crickhollow. He had even brought all of his notes and his ingredients with him. Pippin had teased his cousin about becoming fixated on this latest effort. Merry had been less than amused with the teasing. Merry was serious about this one. He was attempting to make a paste that would hold wood together. Pippin couldn’t really see the point.

Nails or studs worked just fine, but Merry had just given one of those long-suffering sighs of his and continued to work.

This morning Merry had wanted to go out to the barn and try the latest batch of paste out on some wood. He said that if it worked, he could make a doll’s house for Pippin’s nieces. He said he could cut the wood, paste it together and it would be strong but safer because there would be no sharp nails that might poke through and injure small fingers. Pippin had been quick to point out that if one got the nails in properly, then none of them should be sticking out where small fingers could touch them. This pronouncement had been met with a snort of disgust.

Pippin shifted his feet a bit, desperately trying to find something firm to use for leverage but once again the rug slid out from under him and he winced. Merry was in big trouble for this! Why was this paste working now when it had fallen apart outside? He groaned and shifted his feet again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Come on, Merry," Pippin had chuckled. "You have to admit that it was sort of funny."

"You think it’s funny that something that I’ve worked on for weeks just falls apart in my hands?" Merry demanded. "Do you think that all of the effort that I have made on this was just so you could have a good laugh?"

Pippin snickered. "Well, no, but since it worked out that way, there’s no sense in denying it, is there?"

Merry whirled around and glared at Pippin. "I don’t know why I ever expect you to understand anything of importance. This is something that could be very useful and so naturally, it means nothing to you."

"What’s that suppose to mean?" Pippin shot back, now not very amused. "Are you trying to say that I don’t understand important things?"

"If something is true, then it’s best to accept it," Merry said, and then turned to walk away.

Pippin was not going to let his cousin get the last word and so he hurried to follow him. "I understand plenty of important things, Merry. I just don’t think that this paste of yours is important."

Merry turned the corner and went down a lesser-used hallway of the Smials, walking quickly. He held fast to the small bucket in his right hand. "That is because it isn’t something you can drink, eat, or amuse yourself with, Peregrin Took!"

Pippin followed after him and called out, "It also isn’t anything that I can use as paste! It doesn’t work, Merry!"

Merry turned into a rather large parlor and sat his small bucket of paste mixture on the table. He turned to face Pippin. "Fine! It doesn’t work all of the time, but it works some of the time. What successful sorts of helpful items have you recently made?"

Pippin sighed, "Merry, that isn’t even useful." He pointed to the bucket as he said this. "You don’t need it. We have nails. We have studs. We don’t need to glue wood together." He waved his arms about trying to make his older cousin see reason.

Merry sighed. He folded his arms over his chest and leaned against the large table behind him. "If I can get this paste to work properly, it can be used to make delicate items like little carved boxes that are hard to secure together without ruining the thin wood. It could be used to paste things together like dishes. You can’t nail a broken dish back together."

"I know that, Merry," Pippin said. "Most sensible folks just buy new dishes."

"You really do think I’m wasting my time, don’t you?" Merry said, looking a bit injured. He straightened his waist-coat and moved around the large table.

"Well, yes," Pippin admitted. "Instead of trying to make paste with those herbs of yours, why don't you use them for cooking like most folks do, or you could make a tonic with them."  He didn’t want to hurt Merry’s feelings but he really didn’t see any point in this paste. "I think you should forget about this and enjoy our visit. Pervinca’s party tomorrow will be great fun. There will be food and dancing and a great many hobbits that we’ve not seen for a while will be there. You could be enjoying yourself. Estella is coming. Sam and Rose will be here. Frodo will even be coming and just lately, he doesn’t come to very many parties. You will be fussing over this paste instead of having a good time with our friends and family."

Merry looked down at the table and then suddenly asked, "Where are we?"

"This room?" Pippin frowned, a bit startled by the change of subject. "This is just an old parlor that is mostly used to store this great, huge, oak table in."

"I don’t think I’ve ever been in here before now," Merry admitted. "It’s a nice old table. I like the carvings on the legs of it."

Pippin wasn’t sure where this was going, but Merry had quit yelling and so it must be an improvement. Also, it didn’t seem to have anything to do with the ridiculous paste. "The table was a wedding gift for my Great Aunt Sapphire’s marriage to one of the North Tooks ages ago. It was hand-carved by her father and brothers. It’s the heaviest table in all of the Smials because the wood is so thick and the legs are so large. We always just refer to it as the wedding table." Pippin ran a hand over the top of the table absently.

"Why is it here in this room?" Merry asked.

"Because, well, I have no idea why, Merry," Pippin admitted. "It’s always been here as long as I can remember. Is this important in any way at all?" He was becoming confused by Merry’s sudden interest in the furnishings of the room.

Merry smiled. "Everything is important in one way or another, Pippin. Take this table for an example. You see these carvings on the legs?" Merry bent down and ran his hand over the delicate flower pattern.

Pippin leaned over and looked and said, "Yes, what about them?"

"They are quite lovely and also they would be hard to duplicate, don’t you think?" Merry said, straightening up and laying a hand on the table top.

"I suppose so," Pippin said, still not sure where this was going.

"What if a piece of the wood were to become chipped from the leg of the table?" Merry asked.

"Well, I suppose it would be ruined if it were a large enough chip," Pippin said.

"Not if you were able to paste the piece of wood back into the leg!" Merry fairly yelled. He leaned close to Pippin and forcing his younger cousin’s back against the table. "If it were to become chipped, then you couldn’t nail it back because the nail would break the wood further and do even more damage. You couldn’t use a stud to hold it in place., But, if you could paste it back, matching up the edges of the break exactly, then it would be as if it had never been damaged. You could save this fine old piece of Took family history and preserve it for future foolish dolts like yourself to enjoy."

Merry turned and walked over to the bucket of paste with its brush sticking our of the top and patted the side of it. "That is what this paste might be able to do with a bit of work."

Pippin sighed and put his hands on the table top. He glared at Merry. "I am not a foolish dolt! And that is not paste!"

Merry strode over to him quickly and pulled the brush out of the container and waved it about. "This is most assuredly paste. It did hold those pieces of wood together in the barn for a bit. I don’t know why they came apart as we were bringing them back to the Smial, but this paste did work!"

"Paste that only works for a while, is not good paste!" Pippin shouted, growing tired of Merry’s attitude. He was also sick to death of hearing about this paste.

Merry glared at him and then, without any warning at all, he took the brush and made a generous swipe across the top of the table near the edge. "Are you out of your noggin’? This is a family heirloom!" Pippin objected as Merry ran the brush back over the same spot on the table a second time.

Merry ignored him and dunked the brush into the bucket and left it there. He then reached over and took hold of Pippin’s hands and pressed them into the wet paste. "So, this isn’t paste? It’s not worth the effort? It has no practical use?"

Pippin struggled to free himself from Merry’s grip. "Let me go! Have you gone completely insane or are you just on your way around the bend?"

"I am proving a point," Merry said, still pressing Pippin’s palms into the paste.

"You are making an idiot of yourself and ruining the wedding table," Pippin said. "Now let go of me. We need to clean this mess up before we’re both tossed from the Smial for destroying an heirloom!"

Merry continued to hold Pippin’s hands in place. "It drys rather quickly and so there won’t be a mess. I also doubt that anyone will come and toss us out because they are all in another part of the Smial getting ready for your sister’s party tomorrow."

"Merry!" Pippin said, kicking at his cousin’s leg and missing. "You are pasting my hands to this table!"

"How can I be doing that, Pippin?" Merry asked, wide-eyed. "You said this wasn’t paste, remember? At the worse, I am just getting you and the table a bit sticky."

Pippin stopped struggling and looked over at Merry. "Fine! If this will prove anything at all to you, then go ahead and try to paste my hands to this table!"

Merry grinned, a bit evilly and said, "That is exactly what I am doing."

They stared at each other fiercely, each one trying to look more menacing than the other. Merry continued to hold Pippin hands to the table top but Pippin had quit trying to free himself from Merry’s grip. The two stubborn cousins stood there for several more minutes. Then Merry let go of Pippin and said, "Now we shall see who is wasting his time." With that, he took a step back from the table and began to watch Pippin intently.

Pippin eyed him and sighed, "Merry, I don’t want you to be unhappy but I also don’t want you to waste your time on-" Pippin stopped speaking and looked down at his hands. He couldn’t move them. He began to make more of an effort to free himself but it wasn’t working.

Merry watched in amusement from the other side of the table. "You were saying, Pippin?"

"I, uh, I, well, "Pippin said, and continued to try and get his hands off of the table.

"Well, whatever is wrong now? Why don’t you stop leaning on that table and say what you mean?" Merry’s grey-blue eyes twinkled with mischief as he watched Pippin struggle.

"I’m stuck!" Pippin said. "Merry, I can’t get my hands off of the table!" Pippin was now looking over at Merry with a trace of panic in his eyes.

"That’s not possible, Pippin," Merry said. "I mean, all I put on the table was this stuff here in this little bucket and you said yourself that it isn’t paste and it doesn’t work. Don’t’ tease me." Merry was grinning.

"Merry, this isn’t funny!" Pippin objected, squirming about and trying to extract himself from the table top.

"Well, I don’t suppose that you are doing this to give me a good laugh, but as it has worked out that way, then why deny it?" Merry snorted, throwing Pippin’s earlier words back at him.

Pippin’s face was turning red with his efforts to free his hands and with his growing anger at Merry. "Get me out of this!"

"Why I should think you’d have no trouble at all getting out of it yourself," Merry said. "The paste doesn’t work. It isn’t as if I’ve nailed you to the table or anything." He picked up the bucket of paste and started for the door.

"Merry! Merry, don’t leave me here," Pippin pleaded. "I’m sorry, alright? You win. It’s paste, Merry, it truly is! Just get me loose!"

Merry stopped for a moment and looked back in amusement at Pippin. His younger cousin was trying to twist his hands off of the table and having no success what so ever. "I am through being teased, Pippin," Merry said. "I am taking my paste and leaving. You can do as you like."

"Meriadoc Brandybuck, you come back here!" Pippin shouted. "Get me loose! Merry, so help me if you don’t come back here right now, I’m going to be very angry!"

Merry chuckled to himself. "What you are going to be, my dear Pippin is stuck," he said, softly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pippin could hear Merry laughing as he walked down the hall. Pippin had been left on his own. He was stuck to this very heavy, very enormous, oak table. He had tried to move it, hoping to get it closer to the door in order that he might use the door frame as leverage to pull himself free. The table had been too heavy and he hadn’t been able to move it an inch. His hands were not in the right position for pushing to begin with. Both of his hands were flush down on the table top right next to the edge, fingers spread out like fans.

When his efforts to move the table had failed, he had tried to brace his feet against a table leg and push himself loose, but this hadn’t worked either. He had yelled for help, but as Merry had suspected might be true, no one was around to hear him. He wasn’t too sure he wanted to be found in the far parlor with his hands stuck to Great Aunt Sapphire’s wedding table, but he also wanted out of this mess. He didn’t know if Merry intended to come back anytime soon and he was likely to miss lunch. He could just imagine Merry sitting down to a nice meal while he stood here in front of an empty table.

His next effort to get free from Merry’s paste put him in an even worse fix. He decided to use his weight to pull his hands loose and had lifted his feet off of the floor and swung himself under the table in one quick motion. Now, he was unable to get back out. His hands were still stuck fast to the table and his feet kept sliding on the rug when he tried to climb out. He was hanging here, hands on the table, feet slipping out from under him on this blasted rug, and he had run out of ideas.

Why wasn’t this paste coming loose like it had outside? Merry had pasted some boards together in the barn and had become excited when they seemed to be holding. He had grabbed them up and he and Pippin had started through the drizzling rain toward the Smials with Merry in a state triumph. Just a few feet shy of the front door, the boards had snapped apart. Merry had been very frustrated. So, why was this infuriating paste holding so well now? Pippin kicked at the rug which continued to slide.

"What are you doing?" a female voice asked from somewhere near the door. Pippin could see feet and the bottom of a violet-colored skirt, but nothing more.

"I seem to be in a bit of trouble here," Pippin managed, moving his feet and feeling the rug continue to slide.

The lass moved into the room and leaned down to peer under the table at Pippin. "You do seem to be having a bit of trouble. What, exactly, are you trying to do?"

Pippin looked toward what he hoped was his rescuer and turned bright red. There, leaning over, looking at him, and smiling, was Diamond Took! Of all the hobbits in all of the Shire that he least wanted to find him, she was at the top of the list. "I, uh, I, well, I’m trying to get out from under this table," Pippin mumbled, completely embarrassed. He watched as she studied him in amusement with her large, dark eyes.

She stood and moved over to the place on the table where his hands were pasted. "Could you use some help, then?" she asked, with a trace of a giggle in her voice.

"If you wouldn’t mind helping me straighten up. This rug seems to go on forever and it won’t hold still," Pippin said, weakly.

She giggled again and then he felt her take hold of his shoulders. "I’m standing on the rug now. That should hold it in place. I think if you and I pull together, I can get you out," she said, snickering.

Pippin carefully placed his feet on the rug and was relieved when it stayed where it was. He inched backward as Diamond pulled. Slowly, he managed to gain his feet. Once he was standing in his original position, he sighed and bent his extremely sore arms at the elbows, flexing them a bit.

"Thank you, very much," Pippin said, looking down at his reflection in the polished wood and feeling like a complete fool. Why did he always embarrass himself in front of this lass? Why was he constantly looking like a ninny when she was around? He could feel his palms sweating against the table.

Diamond moved from behind him to the side of the table and looked down at his reflection also. "So, I suppose you’re stuck to this table, aren’t you?" she said, lightly.

Pippin nodded.

"How?’ Diamond asked.

"Well, it’s paste of a sort," Pippin said. "My infernal cousin, Meriadoc made it." He still was unable to look her in the eye. The first time he’d seen her had been at his thirtieth birthday party. He’d been struck by how very lovely she was from the moment he’d seen her. He had then proceeded to embarrass himself several times in front of her during the evening. He had finally managed to dance with her and if he were honest with himself, he would have to admit that he had thought a great deal about her since then. Now, here he was, looking like an idiot in front of her again. He would kill Merry for this. He would kill Merry if he didn’t die of embarrassment before he got the chance.

"That was clever of him," Diamond said, smiling.

Pippin could see her reflection in the table top. She was, without exception, the single most lovely hobbit lass that he had ever laid eyes upon in all of his life. He swallowed. "Yes, he is very clever. We’re all very proud of him," Pippin sighed sarcastically pulling at his hands, nervously and continuing to sweat.

"Why did he paste you to the table? Or did he?" Diamond asked, leaning forward in an effort to look Pippin in the eye. She had been intrigued by him since his birthday party and he was extremely cute. He wasn’t at all what she had expected. He was sweet and a bit shy with a darling sense of humor. She had expected the Thain’s son to be very formal and proper and maybe even a bit of a snob. Peregrin Took was none of those things. She was terribly amused by his current predicament.

He raised his head and turned his blushing face toward her. "I think he may be a bit angry with me. I didn’t think that his paste worked very well and so I told him that. I was wrong and it was the wrong thing to say," Pippin said.

"So it would seem, "Diamond giggled. He was even cuter than she’d remembered. "I should have counted on some excitement when I agreed to come to the Great Smials with my family to celebrate your sister, Pervinca’s birthday. You Tooks here at the Great Smials do the most interesting things." She was remembering her last visit during which he’d managed to douse her with water while bobbing for apples.

"We try our best," Pippin said, wrinkling his nose a bit. At least, he thought glumly, I haven’t poured anything on her this time.

"Nose itch?’ Diamond asked.

Pippin nodded. "Why do you suppose that always happens when you’ve no free hands to scratch with?" He laughed, nervously and wrinkled his nose again.

Diamond reached over and gently scratched his nose for him and smiled. "I don’t know, but it does, doesn’t it?"

Pippin felt the air going out of his lungs. Diamond North Took of Long Cleeve was touching his nose. The lass who’s very name made him blush was scratching his nose. He swallowed and shifted his feet a bit as a very large butterfly took flight in his stomach. "Thank you," he managed to whisper.

"You are most welcome," Diamond said. "So, now what do we do?"

"What about?" Pippin asked, staring at her, hopelessly enchanted.

She laughed, not unkindly. "How do we get you out of this? You seem to be stuck to the wedding table." Apparently, Diamond knew the history of this piece of furniture also and why not, after all? His Great Aunt Sapphire Took had married a North Took. The table was a part of her family’s history also.

"Oh, I have no idea," Pippin said, pulling back from the table as far as he was able to, arms stretched out in front of him. "It seems to be very good paste after all. Merry will be thrilled at how well it’s working if he ever returns."

Diamond ducked her head down and stepped between him and the table. His heart went into his throat and stuck there. She was standing with her back to the table, facing him in between his arms. He could feel the bottom of her skirt brushing against his lower legs and she was looking up at him with those amazing eyes of hers. He couldn’t believe it. She reached up and put her hands on his shoulders and smiled. "Maybe if I pushed?"

"W-W-What?" Pippin stammered, as her fingers tightened on his shoulders.

"I said, maybe if I pushed," Diamond suggested. "I could put my back against the table and push against your shoulders. Maybe that would help."

Pippin gulped and nodded. He didn’t care if she hit him soundly on the head with a hammer at this point as long as she continued to look at him with those eyes. Just as long as she stood there between his arms with her hands on his shoulders, he really didn’t care what happened. Diamond pushed at that moment. She pushed hard, but Pippin’s hands didn’t move.

"Well, that doesn’t seem to help in the least," Diamond said, turning around to examine his hands.

Pippin leaned forward and inhaled. He could smell a hint of lavender in her dark curls. There, in the center of her hair, was a single white ribbon tied in a bow, just like the one he’d taken from her on his birthday when they’d been dancing. He still had that ribbon in a drawer in his room. As she leaned forward and began to tug gently on his hands, she backed into him and he longed to put his arms around her. He could hear her skirt rustling and her feet were touching his. He was going to explode from it all.

"You are most definitely stuck," Diamond said, having no idea what affect she was having on him at this moment. "I think maybe I should go for help, don’t you?" She spun around and bumped into his nose which had been against her hair.

"Ouch," Pippin said, surprised by her sudden motion and the pain it had caused him.

"Oh, I am so sorry," Diamond said, reaching up and rubbing the bridge of his pointed nose with her fingers. "I didn’t mean to hurt you. I’m not helping very much, am I?" she laughed, her other hand on his shoulder.

"I’m fine," Pippin lied. His nose hurt and he was trying not to sneeze on her. She tilted her head back a bit more, raised up on her toes, and inspected his face critically.

"Are you sure?" she asked, and he could stand it no longer. Pippin didn’t even allow himself to think about it. He just leaned down to meet her and pressed his lips gently against hers.

Startled, but only slightly, Diamond tightened her grip on Pippin’s shoulder and leaned into the kiss. As she did so, Pippin increased the pressure and her lips parted slightly, deepening the kiss. She pressed her hips against the table and placed her other hand into his curls. They kissed rather passionately for two hobbits who had only met once before. Diamond pulled back slowly, looked at him and then leaned in for a second kiss. Being as she was the only one of them with free hands at the moment, she was in charge.

Pippin felt her lean all of her weight against him and tighten her grip on his shoulder. He could smell the lavender in her hair, feel the weight of her against him, and taste the sweetness of her lips. As she pulled away this time, Pippin found himself wanting to hold her but at this moment, that wasn’t possible. She smiled at him. "I wasn’t expecting that, Peregrin Took."

"I hope you didn’t mind too much," Pippin said. "I just couldn’t help myself. I suppose that if you want to slap me for my cheek, now is an excellent time. I am at your mercy."

"I rather like you this way," Diamond said, quietly and ran her fingers through his curls, letting her hands slide down onto his shoulders. "I also rather enjoyed the kiss." Having admitted this, she raised up on her toes again and put her lips on his. Pippin moved closer to her and kissed her again.

"Are you sure you don’t want me to go for help?" Diamond asked when they moved apart to breathe.

"I don’t think we need any help just now," Pippin said. "I happen to think that we’re doing just splendidly." He leaned over to kiss her again and she pressed into him, wrapping her arms around him. Suddenly, something happened and his hands snapped free of the table top, sending them both to the floor. Pippin landed with a thud on the rug and Diamond landed right on top of him.

Merry had been watching from the doorway and grinning. He watched as the two hobbits fell to the floor next to the wedding table. Diamond raised herself onto her palms which were on the floor on either side of Pippin’s head and giggled. Pippin had placed his hands on the small of her back and Merry could hear his younger cousin’s infectious laugh.

"It looks like you’re free now," Diamond said, still not moving.

"That’s a shame really," Pippin said, softly and he meant it. "Maybe if I can find Merry and make him angry again he’ll paste me to the table a second time. I think, for the most part, that I enjoyed it. I am moving that infernal rug first."

Diamond giggled again and Merry slipped un-noticed from the room. He would have to tell Pippin about the paste later. He had finally figured out what caused it to come apart. When the rain had hit the boards, the paste had dissolved. It seemed that his paste didn’t work if it became wet. He had come, bringing a cup of water with him, to free Pippin and explain about the paste. He doubted that Pippin would be all that interested in his news at the moment. Perhaps he would tell him later.

As Merry turned the corner in the hall, he bumped into Estella Bolger who looked up at him and said, " Hello, Merry. Have you seen Pippin? His sisters are looking for him. Pearl would like him to help move some of the tables for the party." Merry suspected that Pearl would be very interested in what Pippin had managed to do with the table to which he’d been glued.

"I think he’s busy just now, but if you would like, I can help Pearl with the tables, " Merry smiled, linking an arm around her waist and leading her away from Pippin and Diamond. Pippin had been right after all. He should just forget about the paste and enjoy himself. From behind him, he heard the sound of Pippin’s laughter mingled with Diamond’s.

"Just what is Pippin busy doing?" Estella asked, turning her head toward the sound of Pippin's laughter.

"Oh, he’s just showing a friend Great Aunt Sapphire’s wedding table," Merry said. "Maybe later if you’d like, I can show you the table, Miss Bolger."

Estella looked at Merry and shrugged. She had no idea what was so special about a table, but if she could spend time with Meriadoc Brandybuck then she was willing to look at someone or other’s wedding table. "Merry?"

"Yes?’

"What is the cup of water for?"

The End