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A Conspiracy of Hobbits  by Dreamflower


No sooner had Fatty arrived than he found himself cornered by Pippin, who looked rather desperate.

“Fatty, I need to talk to you as soon as possible--alone.” He cast a glance at Folco, who was making his greeting to Eglantine. Pippin’s mother was the only member of the Took family who found the young Boffin amusing

"All right, Pippin. I’ll come to your room shortly. Where are Merry and Frodo?”

“Oh, Pearl and Falco invited them to tea. Falco has some kind of business he wants to do in Buckland, and he wants to pick Merry’s brain.” Pearl’s husband Falco was also a Bolger, and a distant relative of Fatty’s.

A short while later, Fatty found the young Took in his room. He was restless, going from pacing about the room, to flopping upon his bed, to jumping up and looking out the window. He looked a bit wild about the eyes.

“Fatty, I’m stuck! Here at the Smials--at least until Halimath!” He explained his parents’ strictures. “So, see, how am I going to know what is going on? What if something comes up, and they take off before The Birthday? What if--”

“Pippin, calm down.” Fatty was going to have to say some things he had thought of ever since Pippin had joined this game, and he was afraid that the tweenager was not going to like it at all. “Listen to me and don’t interrupt.” He used a firmer tone than was usual for him, and wide eyed, Pippin nodded. “You do know that Merry had your best interest at heart by keeping you out of this.” Pippin opened his mouth, but Fatty held up a hand, and he shut it again. “I don’t know if you’ve thought of this, but if all of you go away on this--this escape--and then somehow return, Merry and Frodo could find themselves in very serious trouble for spiriting away an underage youngster, especially the son of the Thain. And if none of you ever return--something that is very likely for any hobbit who ventures away from the Shire, your parents will grieve forever, and you leave your father without an heir.” Pippin’s eyes filled with tears. “I know how much you love Merry and Frodo, but it really would be wiser if you did not try to go through with this.” Again Pippin started to speak, but Fatty held his hand up once more. “However if you still insist, I will do all I can to help you go with them, as I suspect that if they give you the slip, you will try to follow all by yourself. And that would be worse than foolish and extremely dangerous.”

“Thank you, Fatty,” Pippin heaved a deep sigh. “I’m not stupid. I have thought of all those things. I don’t believe anyone who knows me would hold Merry and Frodo responsible for my going along--they’d know it was entirely my idea. As far as my family goes…” Again his eyes filled up with tears, and then he suddenly broke down sobbing. Fatty took out his handkerchief to give him, and patted him on the back for a few minutes.

“I’m sorry,” Pippin sniffed, “I know how hard it’s going to be for them. But I can’t let Merry and Frodo go without me. I just can’t! I can’t even make myself imagine it. And you’re right, I won’t, I would slip off after them, you know I would.” That stubborn look was back on his face.

“Very well, then. I will keep you posted on any developments, and let you know right away if there are any signs that Frodo and Sam are planning on leaving early.”

Pippin’s grin lit his face up like a beacon. “Oh, Fatty! You are a splendid fellow.” He grabbed Fatty in a great hug. “I’m sorry I ever thought you were dull!”

Fatty shook his head. The Tooks were so volatile. But quite amazing, nonetheless.


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