Title: Changes
Fandom: Lord of the Rings
Author: Endaewen
Rating: G
Disclaimer: All characters and settings belong to the family of J.R.R. Tolkien.
Summary: One Shot. Complete. Post Quest. Frodo's thoughts on Merry, Pippin, Sam and himself.

So little has changed, it was a year since his return and Frodo was standing in the Battle Garden to remember the hobbits who had died fighting Saruman's ruffians. He finished his thought looking at those standing on either side of him, and yet so much.

So little because life went on as it did before and the events of the previous year seemed not to have left a lasting impression on the inhabitants of the Shire. Perhaps there was a bit more awareness of how good life was, having seen the bad, and maybe more emphasis on watching the borders on the parts of the bounders and the Shirrifs; but little else. It was a year of plenty, as if to make up for the shortages they winter before, and all the things that went with that: harvest, feasting, celebration, gossip and fun, the same things that went on every year. Of course, this year there was a new topic of interest: mainly speculation on what the newly returned hobbits had done.

And, for Frodo and those who returned with him, so much had changed thanks to the experiences they had lived through during the War of the Ring. Merry. Pippin. Sam. Himself. All of them had been through so much since they had left the Shire.

His gaze settled on Merry, or Meriadoc Brandybuck as he was known formally. Frodo's cousin and childhood friend now had other names by which he was known outside of the Shire. Names such as 'Holdwine of the Mark'. He and Pippin have come so far from listening to Uncle Bilbo's tales. Now they are in tales of their own. Deservedly. In the Ringbearer's opinion, the heir of the Brandybuck family had *earned* that recognition, though it would not truly be understood by most. Only those who had faced what we did could really understand. There just aren't the words to explain. To the rest of the Shire, orcs are just things out of Mad Bilbo's tales. Let alone Black Riders or Ents or any of the other things we saw and faced.

He faced the one who struck me down. And he won, not just defeating the Witch-King, but aiding in his destruction. Frodo still had trouble believing that. He also hoped that his cousin felt no lasting effects from the experience.

Still, he thought, in many ways the experience seems to have been good for Merry. He'll likely be a better leader because of it. Pippin too, probably. Both of them seem to have a greater sense of responsibility now as well as a gift for command. He thought of the way they had taken command of the uprising against Saruman. The rest of the Shire sees it too, they are often consulting with the two Travelers, and even Sam on what they should do now.

That thought led on to Pippin, who was standing next to Merry. The youngest of the four hobbits, and, Frodo would have said the most changed, though the others wouldn't have agreed with his opinion.

Like his older Brandybuck cousin, the young Took had grown on his travels. Grown more than just in size, he's grown in character as well, Frodo thought. The Pippin standing in the garden with him was very different than the one who had slipped away from the Shire with him so long ago, or so it seems now, we've seen and done so much. Gone were the thoughtless actions and much of the silliness, those things Gandalf had called 'foolishness'. Replacing them was a solemnity and awareness of consequences that meant that Pippin now thought through his decisions.

The first signs of those changes came after Moria, when he feared that it was his dropped stone that led to Gandalf's fall. All of us eventually managed to convince him otherwise, but according to Merry, it was only when Gandalf returned that he let go of the idea completely.

And the rest must have been from his encounter with the Palantir. Pippin hasn't said much about it, and I understand why. There are a few things like that for me now as well. From the little he has said though, I know he faced the Dark Lord, Sauron himself in the Palantir. None of us fully understand what he went through at that time, though he says he has talked to Aragorn about it. Aragorn managed to turn the stone away from him, so if anyone would understand it was him. I am in awe of my cousin for what he did then. He faced the Enemy and refused him the information he wanted. Still, he hasn't completely lost his joking and carefree ways. I saw him with Bergil in Minas Tirith when he was off duty. Since the Shire has been getting back to normal, I've seen signs of it coming back even more. He chuckled at that. The youngster liked to tease Sam about his 'understanding' with Rosie Cotton.

Frodo looked at the last of the group, known to the rest of the Shire as the Travelers, standing beside him on the other side. Samwise Gamgee. The one who stayed with him through everything on the Quest. He started as my gardener, but even before leaving the Shire, I thought of him as my friend, though he kept everything on a master/servant level. Even now he's not comfortable with the way I see him as an equal. He still sees me as his superior.

Out of the four of us, he's the one who's changed the least. He succeeded where I failed, rejecting the Ring completely at Cirith Ungol. He says it was his hobbit-sense that saved him, and I believe him, for of all the hobbits I have known, Sam possesses that quality in the greatest measure. I think he will go far. He smiled again. Now if only he'd settle down with that lass of his. I know he wants to.

And me. No matter what they say, I know I'm not the hero everyone says I am. I failed. At the end I claimed the Ring for myself. The only reason it was destroyed then was chance. Chance and an accident. Gollum took the Ring from me and then he fell into the Cracks of Doom. I failed, although none of them understand that.

He looked again at Merry. I hope he doesn't feel the sorts of effects from his experience with the Witch-King that I did. Not only the Morgul-knife wound, but Shelob's sting and the destruction of the Ring. Each one haunts me though I try not to let the others know. They would just worry when nothing can be done. At least not here.

Gandalf was right when he said that some wounds cannot be entirely healed. At least not in Middle-Earth. I'm going to take Arwen's offer when the time comes. Perhaps then I'll find ease. For the others, being back here in the Shire seems to be enough. I'm glad about that, glad that home is enough for them to heal. I hope they live long and happy lives. As for me, I think that I will be leaving in the next year or so.