A/N:  This is more movie-verse than book. The usual love and angst fest. :)

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You nearly drowned trying to reach me the first time I left you. I thought I was protecting you by going by myself. But you wanted to protect me even more and you nearly died the same way my parents did. I couldn’t let that happen to another person I loved. I couldn’t save them, but I could save you. I reached down to you and you grasped my hand.

But how did I repay you after that for such devotion and loyalty?

I got angry at you. I shouted at you. I didn’t trust you. I did not believe you when you told truths that were plain to see, but I was blind to. I held Sting at your throat. I would have killed you. I abandoned you to go toward the enemy alone. I even let myself be led into thinking you were my enemy. You, my dearest, most loyal of friends...

And how have you responded?

With nothing but unfailing, unceasing, unwavering love.

I have bruised, battered and broken your heart, but you have never ceased to give it to me. All these months you have fought the Ring to keep my soul from tearing apart. All these months you have had to watch as it possessed more and more. You have been my strength, my hope, my succor this whole time. I would have nothing, be nothing, without you.

When I couldn’t fight for myself, you continued to fight for me. When I couldn’t walk anymore, you carried me, though you were nearly as weakened as I was. When I betrayed you and myself and all that was good and claimed the Ring, your love did not falter even then. When all I wanted to do was die, you gave me a reason to live.

But as I barely clung to that ledge and looked up at you for endless moments, I didn’t know whether I could embrace what you offered. I knew it shouldn’t have been a difficult decision to make, to take the hand you reached down for me or to let go and fall into the fire. But it was, my dearest Sam. It was the most difficult decision I had ever made. I saw all the fear in your eyes and how very much you wanted me to reach up for you. And I know you could see everything that was in my eyes, how I struggled to decide whether to be with you or it, how much I wanted to let go, how much I wanted to die: another hateful, hurtful thing I’ve done to you that I am so sorry for, so very sorry.

Yet you forgave me that without a thought, as you have forgiven me everything else I have done to you. You have kept loving me and I am in awe that you can still do it. It has sustained me this whole time, so why was it so hard to decide to choose you over the Ring? Your love was purity and light in my darkest nights, brightness in the blackness that had delved into my heart and lacerated my soul. I kept looking into your eyes and you kept looking into mine, though I knew it broke your heart to see what was there. As the Ring melted, the decision become clearer. For months, it only took from me, bit by bit destroying me. For months, for the entire span of decades I have known you, you have only given me your whole heart and strength. I made my choice. You reached down to me and I grasped your hand. I had to try twice, but you wouldn’t let me go.

 I do not deserve all you have so richly and faithfully given me, but I am so grateful for it.

You are my hero, Sam.

I love you.

* * *

You took on a burden, even though you knew how much it had already hurt you and I think you knew, or feared leastways, that you would be hurt more, but you said ‘yes’ so no one else would be if you could help it. You were terrified, but you knew what you had to do and you did it. You were tired, cold and hungry, but you went on out of love. You were twisted inside out, but you fought against it and when you failed, you got up and fought again. When you no longer had the strength to walk, you got down on your belly and crawled, so great was your determination to fulfill your Quest and protect all those you loved and so many others you did not even know, but wished to protect nonetheless. I have loved and grieved for you more and more on this journey as I have watched you struggle to keep going, but never more than at that moment.

You were intent on saving everyone else even as you came to understand more and more that it would come at the cost of yourself. Still you went on. You were spent bit by bit on that journey, poured out. Your body seemed too small for all you had to endure, but not so your heart. You gave and gave and gave. You sacrificed everything so we wouldn’t have to sacrifice anything. The Ring did not spare your heart any more than it did your body, ripping it to shreds as it weakened your frame. Still you went on. When you were possessed fully at last, still I loved you. I could not let you make the final sacrifice, especially when you no longer needed to. The Ring was gone. You did not need to be. So, my dear treasure, I reached down to you and you reached up.

I know you have tried to hide all the torment of our journey from me, but I have always seen you with more than my eyes. I imagine I can see, behind the barriers you have so carefully constructed, all the tears you are too afraid to shed, all the wounds that still bleed in you, even now, months later. I have watched you struggle to put your life back together and seen the pain in your eyes and behind your sad smiles. I have watched you wrap your too-frail frame in blankets even in the summer to keep from shaking from the cold that continues to reside in your soul.

You have given everything so we could have everything.

You are my hero, Frodo.

I love you.