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From the Bottom of My Heart  by PIppinfan1988

Disclaimer: These hobbits are, unfortunately, not mine. They belong to JRR Tolkien.

A/N: This story takes place a couple weeks after Master of Comforts (Yulemath-Yuletide, 1408).  Most of chapter two has been re-written, hence a new title. Yes, this is yet another scrubbed tale from ff.net.

From The Bottom of My Heart

Chapter One - A Peculiar Evening

“Ouch!” Esmeralda stuck herself yet again for the hundredth time as she meticulously stitched the monogram “SB” into the dark blue cloth. The heavens know I’ve done this enough times, she thought to herself as she put the injured finger to her mouth. However, at the recent age of seventy-two, her eyes were not as sharp as they used to be. She reached into her apron pocket for her spectacles. She hated wearing them, but Saradoc insisted. Rather than argue, she complied; if he were to find her sewing without them on, she would never hear the end of it.

Upon hearing the door open and shut in the entrance hall, she quickly slid the sewing needle into the dark material, stashed it into her workbasket, and set the lid over it. She then took the patchwork quilt she had been working on the past couple of months and set it in her lap, continuing with her sewing.

Saradoc peeked into the parlor before entering. “Hullo, love. Sewing again I see.” He came over to his wife and placed a kiss on her cheek. Nothing. She said nothing about the pipe smoke on his breath or in his clothing, and it had been a long while since she did. Ever since she was expecting their first child long ago, Esmeralda complained about the smell of pipe smoke; how it made her feel nauseated. For the past twenty-seven years or so, he would sneak outside or go to a different room (usually his study) and open a window in order to enjoy a smoke. Lately though, he had come to just going to the common room in the main hall with the other male hobbits to sit and smoke while having good conversation on the side. He made sure he enjoyed the company of his fellow pipe smokers these days as he had big plans for the future. As one of his anniversary gifts to his wife, he would quit smoking.

“I’m trying to finish this quilt before winter is over with and we won’t need it anymore.” Esmeralda let her shoulders relax as Saradoc gently massaged them.

“Well don’t overdo it, dear. We have plenty of blankets and quilts as it is.”

“But this one is...special.” Esmeralda put one hand over his and kissed it.

He did not understand what made this quilt so special, but he was not going to put a damper on this evening. His bones protested his age as he sat down in the chair on the other side of the lamp table. “Is Merry about?”

“He just left not too long ago. He went back to his apartment to do something, though he wasn’t very clear about what it was.” She paused in her sewing. “He’s was acting quite peculiar. Do you know of what he’s up to?”

“No, I don’t.” he answered. “As a matter of fact, he was behaving very strange when he visited my office earlier.”

Esmeralda put down her sewing again, “Yes! It was as if he was staring at me. For a moment I thought that I might’ve missed wiping food from my chin at supper!”

Saradoc was going through his personal letters from the office. “I know what you mean. I thought he was boring holes into the back of my head until I finally sent him on a forged errand to the North Tunnel.”

“Sara!”

“It wasn’t entirely false. I gave him a message to remind Aunt Dellie that 1 Yule Dinner would be formal this year.”

Esmeralda crinkled her brow in concern, “But it’s always been formal, Sara, she knows this.”

“Yes, well, I told Merry that since Auntie was getting up in age she needed a bit of reminding. Merry didn’t question it, and that’s all that mattered,” He stated as he took one letter and laid the rest aside, “and it saved the rest of my head from further holes. I daresay he takes after your side of the family when he behaves so.” He ignored the sharp look his wife gave him as he opened the envelope and silently read the letter. After a few seconds, he refolded the letter and slipped it back inside its envelope. “I need to take this letter to the office right away. It’s business.”

“Now? It’s almost Eight o’clock, Sara.”

“It’s rather important,” he said, “and I’m afraid it will slip my mind to bring it with me tomorrow. I promise to return quickly.”

Esmeralda sighed, “Seems more than just Aunt Dellie needs a bit of reminding. Will you be having dessert in our quarters this evening, or in the dining room?”

Saradoc shook himself from his deep thoughts just in time to catch most of what his wife said. “In our quarters tonight, dear.”

 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Merry sat at the desk in his office concentrating on the paper at his hand. It was not this week’s inventory of the larder, nor was it a legal document that would require his father’s signature. It was one of two rather large sheets of paper that he had recently purchased and had specially cut by an itinerant merchant from Staddle. Brass paperweights covered each of the four ends of the paper to keep it from curling inward. He smiled as he thought of the subjects that would be in his drawing. Poor Mum, he thought to himself, and that wild goose chase Dad sent me on to be rid of me! Aunt Dellie’s mind is as sharp as it was ten years ago! Merry quietly laughed at her response to the message: “I know that 1 Yule dinner will be formal! You can tell that father of yours that I still have my wits about me, and being Master or not I can still turn him over my knee--and I will if he sends me another message like this one!”

He took in a deep breath, filling his lungs, and then slowly let it out. He picked up a sharpened piece of charcoal that lay near his right hand, and began to draw in explicit detail what his inner eye recalled of his parents earlier that day. His inner eye was 20/20; drawing was his niche in life. His cousin, Pippin, dearer than a brother and also his best friend, had the ability to sing, dance, recite poetry verbatim without cues and dramatize it at the same time. Although Merry was known to carry a half-ways decent tune himself, his talents were not the same as Pippin’s. However, drawing objects, scenery, and people, was part of Merry’s repertoire of talents (among others) and he enjoyed it immensely. He had already drawn portraits of his younger cousins, and a few older ones as well. He was still honing his finer artistic talent, so his skills were not quite in demand yet.

This portrait would be a very special project for him. The 30th wedding anniversary of his parents would arrive in two days, and he estimated he would be able to finish it by then if he worked diligently. He could see his mother’s face before him as if she stood before him this minute. He could see her mouth that readily gave way to a smile, which complimented the laugh lines around her shining green eyes. Countless times those smiles chased away an ugly dream, or soothed a hurting heart.

His father, on the other hand, proved to be more of an enigma; his face was not as familiar (emotionally) to him as his mother’s face, as he had only become truly acquainted with his dad within the last few years or so. Merry could see Saradoc’s face clearly, but it seemed as if a stranger were looking back at him. He pressed on. His father’s facial features were not as precise as his mother’s was--not because he was not able to draw it, but because it was simply unfamiliar to him. He had no idea how the lines around his dad’s mouth got there. Was it from holding his pipe? Or perhaps did he smiled several hundred times while Merry was not looking and develop them? Maybe it was just plain age. Merry laid down the piece of charcoal. He stared at the half-drawn, unfamiliar face before him and resolved he would find the answers to those questions in the morning. He yawned; it was getting late. Before he could draw his father any further, Merry had to know the stories behind the unique features of his dad’s face to be inspired by them. He pulled open the upper left drawer and took out the large red silk cloth that would cover his unfinished work. Now to figure out a way to keep his father out of his apartment until he was finished...

Chapter Two - Needing Each Other

Saradoc was pleasantly surprised when he awoke at down and found snow covering the ground outside. The snowfall seemed harmless enough the evening before; a nice touch for the Yuletide. This morning, however, it was a bit disconcerting. He worried if the pony would be able to undertake some of the narrow country lanes in this weather.

As the snowflakes fell upon his upturned face, memories of a 2 Yule long ago came to his mind. It was when he and his friend’s sister were married thirty years ago. These days, it was his life-long mate who was his closest friend; through laughter and tears, sickness and health, they made it through to now. He would do anything for his beloved wife, and today was no exception. He saddled up his pony, slid his foot into the stirrup and swung himself up into the saddle. He was traveling all the way to Haysend today to meet a tradesman whom he hired to fashion the most beautiful gift for his lovely wife. The letter he received yesterday evening said the Man from Bree would be dealing near the gate today, and his gift would be there waiting for him. Even if the snow piled above his head, Saradoc vowed he would make it there.

 

* * *

Esmeralda was making great progress with the monogram, as her husband seemed to be out and about this morning. It was gold lettering upon a dark blue cloth. When the appliqué was finished, she would sew it onto the smoking jacket she had made for her husband. Esmeralda smiled to herself. All these years I’ve objected about his pipe smoking. He’ll be so surprised! True, ever since she found she was expecting her first son, Saramac, the smell of pipe smoke would turn her stomach upside down. Perhaps it was within the past few years, when everyone was able to relax and not be so on edge that she herself was able to sit back and rediscover how much she liked the smell of it. She had many fond memories of her own father, Adalgrim Took, who often carried the fragrant smell of pipe smoke in his clothes. She decided that she would give back that joy of pipe smoking to Saradoc on their anniversary by presenting to him a new jacket.

“Mum?”

Esmeralda looked up from her sewing. Merry was well aware of her gift, so she didn’t bother to shield it from his view.

“Have you seen Dad?”

“No, sweetie, I haven’t. He was gone from the bed this morning when I woke up, and he wasn’t at breakfast.” She took a moment to think. “Have you looked for him in his study?”

“No, I suppose I will look there shortly.” He sat in his father’s chair near his mother, watching her stitch the delicate golden thread into the material. “Where are your spectacles, Mum?”

Esmeralda sighed, catching his gaze out of the corner of her eye. It was the way he was looking at her, but it wasn’t like yesterday when he was shamelessly staring at her face, but it was more like he was in thought. She slid her hand into her pocket, pulled out the wire frame and propped them on her nose. “What’s on your mind, love?”

Merry thought for a minute before responding, “You....and Dad.”

Esmeralda’s curiosity was piqued. “What about us?”

“Do you love each other?” He hesitated before speaking again. “I mean, do you love him? Why did you stay with him all these years?”

She was taken aback by the sudden and very personal question. “I don’t know if I’m prepared to answer such a serious and private question, Merry.” She looked at her twenty-six-year-old son; to her, he may as well have been six. The expression on his face reminded her of when he was a little boy. Then the memories of that time in his and her life hit her mind with a vengeance.

Merry got up and kissed her cheek, “You don’t have to answer, Mum, it was only a thought.”

Esmeralda laid aside her sewing, took Merry by the hand over to the couch, and sat him down next to her. “It’s a very personal question, Merry. But one that deserves answering--or at least a semblance of one.” She took in a deep breath. “Of course I love him. Yes, there were some terrible years that I regret, but I never fell out of love with him, Merry. Many couples go through a period that tries the very fabric of their relationship. I have always loved him as much as I love you. I think because of those years, we were forced to talk and to confide in one another in ways that we wouldn’t have otherwise. I believe our love for one another--and for you--is stronger for that.”

Merry was silent for a while. He remembered how a few years ago he and his dad shared a joke. Merry thought the jest really wasn’t very funny, but he so enjoyed in the sharing of it, that he laughed right along with his father. Perhaps that’s when his dad’s laugh lines around his mouth developed. Or the first time Merry saw tears in his dad’s eyes after the bitter row they had when he was a teenager. Even now, years later, Merry knew the pain of Saramac was still in his father’s heart, but now he at least understood it. Merry rued that his father never spoke to him of the pain in his heart; he would have gladly shared in that as well. “He needed you, didn’t he?”

Esmeralda’s heart went out to Merry. She reached over and smoothed back her son’s curls with her fingers. She smiled sadly, “He did. And I needed you.”

Merry sighed; standing up from the chair, he kissed his mother, “Thanks, Mum. I love you.”

Chapter Three - Haysend

Saradoc tethered his pony to a young leafless birch tree with snow in the crooks of its branches. There were countless number of hobbits meandering about the market place today at Haysend, and more than likely, it was the Yuletide that brought them here. Saradoc cupped his gloved hands to his face and blew into them to warm them up some; his breath escaped between his fingers in vapors. The snow reached past his ankles as he trudged through it towards the Hay Gate. There were a few merchants of the Big Folk close inside, but usually ventured no further. He looked into the crowd of booths but did not see the tradesman he sought. He spied a familiar hobbit standing near to the vendor selling confections. Saradoc yelled to him, “Hey, Hob!”

An older looking hobbit standing near a fire pit warming his hands turned around at hearing his name called. “Hullo, Mister Saradoc!”

Saradoc met up with him at the fire pit. “Hullo, Hob. I’m looking for Galion the jewel dealer. Have you seen him?”

The other hobbit shook his head. “No, I haven’t, and I‘ve been watching the Gate all day. I know he’s supposed to be here soon. I purchased a gold locket from him for my daughter, Sage.”

Saradoc rubbed his hands in front of the fire. “Then I suppose we shall wait together.”

~ ~ ~

Everyone waited expectantly for luncheon at the table in the dining room. It was set to begin as soon as the Master sat in his own chair at the head. “Has anyone seen Sara?” Esmeralda was becoming concerned. While her husband may skip a meal here and there because of business, he always requested a tray and left word with someone of his intentions. That way, his wife would sit in his stead and begin the meal.

It was not until later in the afternoon that Esmeralda’s concern turned into unease. Her husband was nowhere to be found. She knocked on Merry’s door to see if he had seen or received word regarding his father.

“No. I even went to his study earlier as you suggested, and he wasn’t there. I’m getting worried, Mum.”

“So am I,” Said Esmeralda, “but where do I begin looking for him if we’ve already been to his study, and no one else has seen him, either?”

Merry thought about it for a moment. “I didn’t search the office, nor did I go out to the stables to see if he’d taken his pony for a ride. I shall do all of that first before we raise the alarm that he’s missing.”

After walking his mother back to her rooms, Merry went directly to his father’s new office. He walked up to the door and then crouched down near the threshold. He shoved his fingers under the door and felt along the floor when his fingers touched the key. Pulling it out, he unlocked the door and stepped inside.

Merry’s eyes scanned the lifeless office. The air was chilled; no fire was set in the hearth. It just did not seem right that his father was not reclining in his high-back leather chair with his feet on the desk, or stretched out for a nap on the long couch. Merry sat down in the leather “throne”, as he jokingly referred to it, his hands caressing its supple texture. It all seemed too big for him...or was it the title of Master he was thinking of? Leaving his thoughts, he began to search through the desk drawers for clues of Saradoc’s whereabouts. He had thoroughly searched through each one when he still came up empty, and slammed the last drawer in frustration. This isn’t like him! Where is he? How can he be so selfish as to leave without word? Just as he leaned forward to get up from the chair, he spotted an open envelope tucked under the desk blotter. Only a tiny sliver was peeking out from under it. Hullo! What’s this? He lifted the blotter’s edge and took the envelope into his hands, turning it about to have a look at the address. There was no return address. He took out the letter and read it:

Master Brandybuck,

The ring and pendant you ordered are finished, and I might add they look splendid. I will be at the Hay Gate on 1 Yule for several hours. Meet me there.

Galion, son of Fallon

Jewel Mercantile of Bree"

Merry refolded the letter and stuck it inside the inner pocket of his waistcoat. So, Haysend is where he went off to. Merry smiled. A ring and a pendant? That scoundrel! He’s going to out-do my portrait! Then his smile faded. If his dad left before dawn as his mother indicated earlier and everything went according to plan, he should’ve returned by now; it was a quarter to three in the afternoon. It should only be a two or three hour ride at the most between Brandy Hall and Haysend on a good day, but with snow? Still, he should have been back already--and the sun will be setting in a couple of hours. Merry lunged out of the chair and ran to his apartment to fetch his coat and tell his mother what he was about to do...though he would leave out a couple details.

~ ~

It was frigid outside even though Merry was wearing his gloves, woolen coat and fur lined cloak. The snow was still soft under the soles of his feet as he made his way towards the stables.

“Merry!”

Merry paused at the stable gate when he heard his cousin Merimas yelling for him, riding in on his own pony. “Hullo, Merimas. I can’t stay; I must ride out immediately.”

“Where to? It’s freezing out here for one, and two--the day is nearly done.” Puffs of white vapor emitted from Merimas’ mouth as he spoke.

Merry briefly explained what he had just learned through the letter that he found in the Master’s office.

“But Merry, you can’t go out alone! It’s too cold for that. I shall accompany you.”

“But, cousin, you’ve just been out in the cold yourself--you’ll end up sick.”

“Remember a few weeks ago when you wouldn’t change out of your wet clothes?” Merimas smiled, “I, too, am a Brandybuck--and I can be just as stubborn!”

Merry was not relishing the idea of going out into the cold alone, either, so he welcomed the companionship. “Thanks, cousin.”

~ ~ ~

Saradoc stood in the shivering cold for over three hours waiting for the merchant from Bree. Fortunately, the Gate watchers allowed him to stand near their bonfire for warmth. Galion finally arrived at the Hay Gate at one o’clock. Saradoc shivered as he inspected the jewelry, made his purchase, and was off back towards Brandy Hall. Saradoc took a glove off for a moment to look at his pocket watch; half past two. This was supposed to be a quick trip; Essie must be worried.

He smiled as he imagined a thousand times over how he would present the lavish gift to his wife on their anniversary tomorrow. She is worth every pence and more! Should he get down on bended knee as he did when he proposed to her? Or, on the other hand, should he get dressed in his finest, as he did when he married her, and slip it tenderly on her finger as she stood gaping at its beauty?

In the midst of his thoughts, Saradoc suddenly found himself face down in the cold snow. It had happened so fast, he barely recalled how he got there. Then he remembered the pony stumbled heavily in the road. She had apparently slipped on a rock and thrown a shoe. Though still stunned, Saradoc right away patted down his coat pockets feeling for a small box. He let out a long breath when his gloved hand felt the box in his right breast pocket. He looked at the limping pony; he could not ride her now. He took the pony’s reins and began to walk. He had passed Standelf not too long ago--should he walk back and seek shelter there? He decided that he would make use of the remaining daylight and head straight for Brandy Hall.

As he marched on in the freezing snow, Saradoc started to shiver all over again. To keep his mind off the road and the cold, he let his mind wander ahead of him to where warmth and the love of his life waited for him.

Chapter Four - 1 Yule

As soon as it touched the treetops, the sun rapidly started its descent towards the horizon. Shadows lengthened and covered the road as the young hobbits slowly made their way south. Neither Merry nor his cousin, Merimas, wanted to miss any sign of Saradoc.

Merry halted his pony to get a steady view of the road ahead. He used his hand as a visor to see further on. “It’s getting colder now that the sun is setting,” he said, drawing his cloak tighter around him.

Merimas said nothing. As an apprentice healer, he knew all too well what the cold could do to one’s body. “Let’s keep moving. Eventually we will arrive in Standelf where we can find a room at the Inn there and warm our--”

“Wait!” Merry shouted.

“...toes,” Merimas finished off his sentence, but he, too, was now looking in the direction his cousin was. “That tree stump is moving or I’m a toad’s uncle!”

Merry had already spurred his pony into a run, racing down the road and churning up snow in his wake. As he approached the “tree stump” he once again halted his pony, and then he slid down from his saddle. His blood was beginning to warm up.

Sure enough, it was Saradoc sitting on the side of the road, uttering incomprehensible sentences. “Dad!” Merry knelt down in the snow. “Dad, it’s me--Merry!”

Merimas got down from his pony and was immediately at Merry’s side. He took off his gloves and right away felt the icy cold breeze against them. He rubbed his hands together and blew hot air (or, what should have been hot air) onto his fingers to warm them up. He slid his hand under Saradoc’s coat to feel for his heartbeat, and then gently lifted one of his closed eyelids. He looked at Merry, shaking his head, “I need more light.”

This last part of forcing open his eyelid roused Saradoc from his dream-state. “Cccold…so cold,” said the hobbit, shivering uncontrollably.

“We’re here now, Dad.” Merry and Merimas each took an arm and helped Saradoc to his feet.

“Whwhere’s Buckllland?”

Merry’s face wore an expression of absolute worry. “We are in Buckland, Dad.”

“I mmmeant...Bbrandy Hall.”

“It’s the cold, Merry. It’s making him confused.” Merimas reached inside the breast pocket of his coat and brought out a flask.

“No!” Merry shouted. “I mean…no thank you, Merimas.” Merry said in a kinder tone.

Merimas was puzzled at his cousin’s outburst. “But it’s just to warm his bones.”

“Distilled drinks do more than just warm my father’s bones, Merimas.”

“I understand. Very well, then,” said Merimas, corking the flask and tucking it back into his coat. “Let’s lift him up into your saddle.”

Merry looked around them, “But where’s Poppy?”

“His pony?”

“Yes. Do you see her anywhere?”

Both lads whistled for the animal. “Poppy!” Merry called out.

Merimas was growing very anxious for Saradoc; he had stopped mumbling, indicating he falling further into his cold state. “Merry, let’s get your dad onto your pony, and then we’ll look for his. We must get him out of the snow and to someplace warm.”

Together the hobbits were able to push him up into the saddle. Merimas held the reins of the pony while steadying his patient who was leaning forward in the saddle. Merry looked about the adjacent field for Saradoc’s pony. A few minutes later, Merry returned with a very frightened and limping, but otherwise hale, Poppy. “She’s his favorite; I couldn’t leave her to freeze.”

Merimas looked up at the twilight in the sky. “It will be dark before we get home, but at least we will be at home tonight, and warming our toes by our own fire.”

Merry carefully held the reins of his pony, watching the road around his father seated directly in front of him in the saddle. Merimas tied the reins of Poppy to his own saddle, riding slowly towards Brandy Hall. With any luck, they would all make it home safely.

~ ~ ~

Roasting meats and baking bread filled every tunnel in Brandy Hall. The residents and the few guests who made it mingled throughout the dining room and the common room, all dressed up in the finest the Shire had to offer. Young children ran about as the dull grown ups talked and gossiped--laughing at goodness knows what. 1 Yule had always been a formal affair, while 2 Yule was more relaxed. Esmeralda was also dressed up in her Yule dinner gown, but was in no mood for merriment. Her husband had been gone all day without a word, and then Merry running out to find him. She was seething, but at the same time, she was extremely fretful about them both. What in her right mind possessed her to let Merry run out into the cold alone? Presently, she noticed Saradoc's cousin, Marmadas approaching her.

“Good evening, Essie. You look lovely in your Yule dress,” he said, sipping the hot cider from his steaming cup.

“Good evening,” was her only reply.

“I noticed the chairs beside you are empty.”

“I’m not inclined to receive company right now, Marmadas.”

“Forgive me,” he smiled his reply, “but I’m not here for your company--although you seem like you could use a good friend at the moment.”

Esmeralda looked up at the gentle-hobbit that stood before her. “What did you want then?”

“Have you seen my son, Merimas?” He glanced about the room, “He went out riding earlier, saying he would return in time for Yule dinner. I am guessing that wherever your son is, my son is probably with him.”

“My son is out looking for my husband.”

Marmadas’ eyebrows arched in surprise. “Merry is out looking for Saradoc? Why?” He sat down unbidden next to Esmeralda.

“Saradoc left early this morning to go to the Hay Gate on errand.”

“In all this snow?” he asked. “I am guessing that he has not returned?” Marmadas watched Esmeralda shake her head. “Gracious me, Essie, I am so sorry.” After a few moments of silence he ventured, “I suppose then if Merimas met up with your Me--” But Marmadas never got to finish his sentence. A commotion entered the common room. It was Mentha who came rushing into the dining room to get Esmeralda, “It’s Saradoc--he’s frozen! Merimas and Merry have brought him in from the cold!”

Not waiting another painful minute, Esmeralda gathered her gown and made haste towards the common room. Folks were crowding around the mayhem, but Marmadas made way for her.

Merry and Merimas were cold and shivering despite the heat emanating from the large hearth. Now lying on the couch, Saradoc appeared as if he were merely sleeping. Several of the elder hobbits helped the lads take off their winter wraps and stood them in front of the fire to warm them up, rubbing their arms and legs to help the blood flow. Merry never took his eyes off his father. He watched as his Uncle Merimac and his mother struggled to take off Saradoc’s coat. “I think he’s dead,” said one hobbit nearby. When Merry heard that, his legs gave way and he sank to his knees on the floor. A younger hobbit lass was sent to find Mistress Salinda for Saradoc; the healer was also attending the dinner. “Tttake hhim up to hhis rrr…,” said Merimas, but the shivering would not let him form the words.

Marmadas came up to his son and handed him his cup of hot cider. Merimas sipped it, but mostly just held the cup to warm his fingers and hands. “Isss ththere any mmmore?” He asked, and promptly handed the hot cup over to his cousin, now sitting on the floor. Mentha left to get more hot cider for the lads.

Esmeralda did not know whom to tend to first; her son or her husband. She gave Merry a quick hug, ensuring that he was all right, and then was back at her husband’s side. When Salinda finally pushed through the crowd of hobbits, she immediately gave instructions for Saradoc to be taken to his room. There, Esmeralda would be the one to gradually warm her husband by lying next to him, giving him her own body heat, under a heavy quilt.

Salinda quickly looked at the shivering tweens, ordering them warm drink and food, then sent off to bed with a roaring fire set in their hearths.

Chapter Five - 2 Yule

Still cold to the bone, Merry crawled underneath the covers in his bed and at once curled into a ball for warmth. His feet were like ice. After a few twists and turns, they still felt like ice, which made it impossible for him to find sleep though he felt weary enough to sleep for a week.

Wrapping a blanket around himself, Merry got out of bed and sat in the rocking chair near the fire, feet propped up on a small stool towards the warm fire in the hearth. He stared at the flames licking up into the chimney; mesmerized by the glow of the cinders rising up into the dark void. The wood hissed and crackled as Merry finally found the warmth his toes so desperately sought.

Unexpectedly, as clear as a sunny afternoon in the Shire, his father’s face was before him, dancing with the flames in the hearth. Merry was not startled; he knew it was his fatigue manifesting itself in this manner. He began to study the face once more. The lines drawn around the mouth still did not have a story behind them, but it was the warm, beating heart beneath that drew his attention. He stared not at the lines of age around the eyes, but at the kindly expression the face held. The only thought that came to the tween’s mind was that this hobbit--his dad--nearly perished today. Moreover, it was all for the love of the lady who stayed with him through thick and thin. Merry decided he wanted that sort of love between him and his future wife, though he vowed he would not tread the same path in life that his father did. It was that love that Merry saw in the face of his father that suddenly inspired him.

Rising up from the rocking chair, still wrapped in the blanket, Merry shuffled over to the little alcove in his apartment that served as his office. It was a bit chilly in here, as the fire’s warmth had not reached there yet. No matter; he turned up the lamp, put another log in the fireplace, then set to making a cup of tea for himself. As the tea was steeping, he sat at his desk uncovering the half-finished portrait. His mother was complete, though his father still needed a bit of work--especially after the recent revelation in his sitting room.

Taking a deep breath, he picked up a piece of charcoal and began where he left off.

~ ~ ~

Salinda held a small candle to the right of Saradoc’s face, and then moved it slowly to the left, watching his eyes following the light. His eyes were no longer large, but were now their normal size. His color, too, had returned during the night. She smiled and turned to Esmeralda, “He’s going to be fine. Just make sure he stays in bed today, and keep him warm.”

Saradoc sighed in disappointment. “Of all days--today is our wedding anniversary.”

Salinda shook her head firmly, “You’ll just have to celebrate your anniversary in bed.” The healer blushed when she realized what she had implied. Picking up her bag and shawl, she wished the couple a happy anniversary and left. “If you need anything, you both know where to call for me.”

Once the outer door had shut, Esmeralda and Saradoc burst into laughter. “Oh, the poor woman!” laughed Saradoc, wiping the tears of laughter from his eyes. He smiled, looking at his lovely bride, “I would love to take her advice a little later, though right now I could eat for a month! I haven’t eaten since yesterday morning.”

“Then you should have something to eat right away, dear.” Esmeralda got up from the bed, went to the door and ordered a large breakfast for two from a servant stationed outside their quarters. However, when she returned, she had another young guest with her. “Look who I found outside our door!”

“I was about to knock when Mum opened the door. I have a gift for you both.” Merry handed his mother a long, narrow roll of paper tied with a red ribbon. “Happy anniversary.”

Saradoc remembered his little box. “Goodness, your Mum and I haven’t even exchanged gifts yet.”

“I can always come back.” Merry turned as if to leave.

“No!” Saradoc called out to his son, then motioned for him to come sit on the bed. “I want you to sit with us as we do,” he winked. “But would you please hand me my coat?” Merry gave his father the coat he had worn the day before to Haysend, and then sat on the bed.

Saradoc reached inside the breast pocket and pulled out a small wooden box. He cracked it open to make sure the items had not fallen out, then took the hand of his wife sitting next to him in the bed, and placed it in her palm. “Happy anniversary, love.”

Before Esmeralda opened the box, she noticed the smiles on her husband and son’s faces. “You know what it is, don’t you, Merry?” Merry only smiled back at her. Then she opened the box; her jaw dropped at the sight of the fine-crafted jewelry inside. She looked up at her husband, mouth still gaping wide. “Sara!” She held aloft a bracelet made of mithril attached to it was a charm made of the same material. Inlaid upon the charm were a large diamond and two smaller rubies on either side. Tears were welling in her eyes. “It’s so beautiful!” She leaned towards Saradoc, wrapped her arms around him, and kissed him.

“But that isn’t all!” Saradoc took the box and emptied the last item into his hand. He took Esmeralda’s right hand, and then slid onto her ring finger the same styled diamond and ruby ring. “The diamond,” He said, “represents us in our marriage; a symbol of strength and endurance. The rubies, represents each of our sons.” He then he smiled sadly as he latched the pendant around her neck, “Fortunately, they were born in the same month, so the stones match.”

Merry took pleasure in watching his mother embrace his father. Esmeralda whispered something in Saradoc’s ear, for his hearing alone. Saradoc smiled, hearing the sweet things his wife was saying.

Wiping away her tears, Esmeralda announced she had a gift for her husband. She walked over to their wardrobe and took something off a lower shelf. She hid her gift behind her back as she returned to the bed. “Close your eyes.” She waited as he shut his eyelids. Merry was delighted to watch his parents exchange gifts. Esmeralda held out the gift for her husband. “You may open them now.”

“Oh!” Saradoc gasped, holding up the dark blue smoking jacket that his wife had made.

Esmeralda was expecting a little more than ‘oh‘. “You don’t like it?”

Saradoc paused in examining the wonderful details of his new jacket. “Yes, I love it! It’s exquisite...but I thought you hated my pipe smoking. You said long ago that it nauseated you.” He held her hand as he spoke, “I had planned on quitting today as yet another gift for you.”

The last three months of painstakingly sewing every stitch into his monogram came to Esmeralda’s mind. “Oh, no you don’t!” She laughed, sidling up to her husband. “Besides, I’ve come to like the smell of pipe smoke again of late. I don’t know how or why, but...when you sit in the common room and smoke, I want you to think of me.”

Saradoc tenderly kissed his wife, “Always.”

Now it was Merry’s turn. He crawled over his dad and sat between his parents so both could view the portrait at the same time. He untied the red ribbon and carefully unrolled the paper. “It needs to be put in a frame,” Merry remarked.

Saradoc was amazed at the detail of both faces. He allowed his fingertips to lightly touch the strokes of charcoal on the paper. He squeezed Merry‘s shoulders, “This is truly marvelous, son. You are incredibly talented.” He looked over to his wife, “We have an artist in the family.”

Esmeralda was also viewing Merry’s portrait with wonder. Without missing a beat, she replied, “He gets it from my side of the family, dear.”

Merry covered his mouth as he yawned, rubbing his tired, and swollen eyes. “I worked all night to finish it after I stopped shivering.” He blinked wearily, leaning back onto his mother’s pillow.

“But the quality--” Saradoc still gazed wide-eyed at the portrait. “It all looks so real...right down to the circles under my eyes!” He smiled and touched his own eyes. “This is lovely, Merry--absolutely lovely. We shall treasure this forever.”

“You stayed up all night?” asked Esmeralda. “Goodness, lad, you must go straight to your own bed and get some rest!” However, when she looked back at her son, she found that she was too late; his eyelids were already closed, breathing deeply in sleep. She looked at her husband, whispering, “Should I wake him?”

“No, let him rest here,” he whispered his reply, quietly rolling up the portrait and laying it aside on the table along with his brand new smoking jacket. He looked at Merry and smiled.

Esmeralda grinned, “What are you smiling about?”

“Actually, it’s a joy,” he replied with a happy grin, “that is...well, unspeakable, and so I smile.”

“Speak it to me,” she said. “I’d like to hear it.”

Saradoc took in a deep breath before softly speaking, so as not to waken Merry. “Well, to begin with, I have my beautiful wife and our remarkable son here at my side. I have come through the last thirty years only because of your love and devotion. There were many times, Essie...” He faltered, “I am glad that you are here by my side today.” He squeezed her hand. “I love you.”

Esmeralda smiled warmly, and gazed into her husband’s blue eyes. She leaned in and gently kissed him.

As they kissed, neither one noticed the smile on Merry’s lips. 

~The End~





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