Lynn H
· 24 August 2011
· Chapter 1: Tree of Life
Impressive! Almost perfect! This is a beautiful story. The only flaw, a very minor one I have to watch myself for, is the use of 'And' to begin a sentence. Compare the repetitive, "And when June came, and..." to the simpler "When June came and.... Not a big change but I think it paces better.
Author's reply
Thank you very much! It's my bad habit as well, partially because it sound more archaic and closer to Tolkien's style to me. I'm trying to reduce it, but sometimes I just can't help myself =)
Ellynn
· 16 August 2011
· Chapter 1: Tree of Life
Absolutely fantastic. This captured my attention from the very first word to the last and I read it "in one breath". This was one of my favorites in Teitho. And yes, I recognized you at once. :) Your style is beautiful.
Author's reply
Ah well... maybe next time I'll try to be less recognizeable, but it's really hard, it seems =) I'm really glad you liked the story! I love this theme, but it was almost hard to think of an original story about trees to write, as I have poems about the awakening of the White Tree and the last mallorn, and also a story about Arwen and mallorns in Lórien... But a linden I know brought me the inspiration :) (http://www.fajnestromy.cz/listnate-dreviny/lipa-velkolista-tilia-platyphyllos-pustovec-slovensko/lipa-velkolista-tilia-platyphyllos-pustovec-slovensko_01.jpg).
I hoped you will enter this month's contest as well, you have some beautiful stories about trees that are in my list of all-time favourites! But maybe next time =) Thank you for voting, and for the review!