Pheeew!!!!! This one left me breathless the first time I read it!!!! The suspense was unbearable, as I kept being called away and I was constantly in suspense all day for the better part of two days!!! My heart was in my throat. Poor Ferdi! After everything he suffered in his youth, everything he did in service to the Shire and the Thain. He was nearly irrevocably wronged and disgraced, far worse than being shunned...
I was so excited when Farry came running! Good for Robin. He knew what to do! And the idea of a ‘truth-sifter’ is fascinating to me. The world needs more of those. Good thing the Bolgers were there to make sure Farry told the truth.
Ferdi and Tolly both really are jewels among hobbits. The fact that they both so willingly forgave Pippin really testified to their characters, if their intentions in this scheme weren’t enough. And well done to Pip for his oath. He has shown that he will keep his promises indeed, if his own son doesn’t object when he makes that claim.
My heart shattered when Ferdi told Pip that he never trusted him again. I suppose I didn’t quite realize that until he said it, but it made perfect sense. It seems wise, given what Pippin did to him, but at the same time, he needed to let it go. I loved that scene with Rosemary. She’s my favorite hobbit-lass! She’s got good sense on her and steadiness to be admired by all. A good sibling for Ferdi. They’re matched well as siblings, and Haldi is a wonderful husband. I love the stories that include them!
I’ve been enjoying pulling out my copies of LotR to look at the maps of the Shire periodically, I love that you’ve included so much description of the places within the Shire and the landscape. I have a wonderful picture of it in my mind. Kudos x 100!
Slán go fóil!
Author's reply
Many thanks for this lovely long review! I love hearing your responses to various people and plot points. In this story, I must give JoDancingtree a great deal of credit for making the story work. (For example, in addition to helping me get past a serious case of writer's block at about the mid-point, she expanded on Tolly's character and family and built so skillfully on the character I'd created that all the extra little details she added worked perfectly with what I'd written about him before!)
I'm glad you find the descriptions ring true. I learned a lot from perusing Tolkien's maps (and other people's maps based on his works), as well as combing the original story for details of the characters' surroundings as they travelled. I have to admit, though, that when we visited England in 2005 and drove through a lot of countryside that was said to have inspired Tolkien's description of the Shire, it expanded my understanding and inspiration and appreciation of the landscape.
I agree about truth-sifters. That invention came out of a bit of wishful thinking of my own. It would have been very helpful to have that ability or at least know someone with that ability!
Again, thanks so much for reading and taking the time to share your thoughts! I very much appreciate it.
Eirinn Leigh
· 12 June 2016
· Chapter 27: Not All the Talk...
At least someone is up in arms for Tolly and Ferdi. To bad Meadowsweet didn't go with to give the Thain and Master a taste of her tongue!
Author's reply
Belated thanks for sharing your thoughts! I imagine Meadowsweet would have had a few choice words to say...
Eirinn Leigh
· 12 June 2016
· Chapter 23: Restitution
How could Pippin take their loyalty for granted when he jumps right off to the conclusion that they have none? I still do not believe Pippin deserves what he has, but perhaps he is beginning to at least realize that he has it and realize it's great worth.
Author's reply
This was such a frustrating story in many ways... I am so thankful to JoDancingTree for her clarifying voice and thoughts; she helped me get from point A to point B and make it all make sense, along with achieving the character growth I was aiming for. Your insights are spot on... Pippin has taken a lot for granted, and he hasn't been held to account up to this point, but he got pulled up short here. And he will have a bigger price to pay, eventually, though going through this process has left him better prepared for it, curiously enough.
Belated thanks for your taking the time to stop and leave your thoughts. I hope this finds you well.
Eirinn Leigh
· 12 June 2016
· Chapter 19: Crime and Punishment
Pippin runs away and Ferdi is put under the ban ad infinitum. Farry runs away and Ferdi is sentenced to banishment. I do not know where he finds his loyalty but it is sorely misplaced and certainly not returned. I know I would have left for the farthest corner of the Shire and be rid of these Faithless Thains long before.
Author's reply
Ferdi was caught in the trap of filial responsibility. He didn't feel he could leave the Great Smials while his father was still alive, badly crippled as old Ferdinand was, and Ferdinand refused to leave the Great Smials to "be a burden" on his daughter and her family. Ferdi and Pippin arrived at an understanding of sorts before Ferdinand's death, though Pippin blasted it to pieces with this particular temper tantrum (but rather than making him totally unpredictable and therefore unworthy of his cousins' loyalty, I have only envisioned him losing control of his emotions and impulsivity when his family is directly threatened - or he thinks they are). His temper is only one facet of of a much more complex and overall bold, insightful, loving and generous personality, so hopefully all this is plausible.
Many thanks (belatedly) for your thoughts. Blessings to you and yours, and I hope this message, if it finds you, finds you well in these uncertain times.
Eirinn Leigh
· 22 November 2015
· Chapter 27: Not All the Talk...
And how will restitution be paid to Tolly now?!
Author's reply
You know, that is an excellent question! As they were two of his largest creditors, he's still somewhat in debt, though not as much in debt as he started out. Yet the restitution that comes out of this situation will become a significant issue, as you have pointed out.
Belated thanks for leaving your thoughts. I'm sorry I didn't see your reviews until now.
Eirinn Leigh
· 22 November 2015
· Chapter 22: Debt
I don't think Ferdi's buying it (Pip's oath) and I wouldn't either, not given their history.
Author's reply
It will take some time (and an incident where Pippin saves Ferdi's life at considerable risk to his own) before Ferdi will learn that his cousin has grown up and learned how to be trustworthy.
Belated thanks! Stay well.
at least some are seeing sense again though I'm still at loss as to how they lost it in the first place.
Author's reply
Temporary insanity, at the very least.
Blessings to you and yours.
Eirinn Leigh
· 22 November 2015
· Chapter 19: Crime and Punishment
So Merry and Pippin make up a story - worst case scenario - in their fear for Farry and then - despite being depicted by both Tolkien and yourself in other works as among the most honorable of hobbits and loyal to the death to their family and friends - despite Pippin *being* good friends with Ferdi from a young age -
how is it that they seemingly lose their heads? lose their loyalty? lose their honor? and lose all they ever knew of two hobbits they've known for a *very* long time in the bargin?
I fail to see how this is plausible... and if it somehow is why that reasoning is not worked into the story.
Author's reply
Goodness! I am answering two reviews from you, separated by time, but both quite belatedly. All I can say is that Pippin is irrational when it comes to the safety of his immediate family. I think I've been consistent in portraying that, though this story might be too much of a stretch.
And so, much-belated thanks for your stopping to share your thoughts, good food for thought, especially in working out characterization and character growth in future stories.
- Hilly an 'old friend' of Ferdi's? Since when? He's always been the first to believe ill of him all the way back to their childhood (in 'Thain') when Hilly took Ferdi as a halfwit and ridiculed and bullied him up one wall and down the other.
-And tis Merry and Pip and Everigard who are acting like men with their thoughts of kidnap and ransom.
Author's reply
Hilly and Ferdi became close during the Troubles, when Hilly lost his jealousy of Ferdi (for Ferdi's being besties with Hilly's much-revered older brother Tolly) and learned to appreciate Ferdi's ideas for keeping the ruffians out. He also came to respect Ferdi's courage at that time, venturing out into the outer Shire while Hilly stayed with those who were keeping the borders, not quite as dangerous a task. There is an unwritten scene (it is part of the "background" to the timeline that guides my story-crafting) where the two of them came to an understanding, which would have been about 20 years before Runaway is set.
You are definitely right; Merry and Pippin might be worried about hobbits being influenced by the ways of Men, but they are (in a manner of speaking) Exhibit A in terms of evidence.
Belated thanks for your thoughts.
Eirinn Leigh
· 22 November 2015
· Chapter 15: A Way of Escape
I fail to the logic in not taking Ferdie's word at least into account. Running off is a common habit of young hobbits and especially of young Tooks. Ferdi has proven his loyalty over and over and over and over again... And wouldn't Pippin remember the last time a Thain's heir ran off 'for forever' and Ferdi took the blame? For that matter Merry should know better than to think that Ferdi would ever abandon Tookland under his own will. If he didn't do so after 9 years under the shunning he certaintly wouldn't when just under suspicion.
This story is exciting and all but frankly unrealistic.
Author's reply
LOL! You definitely have a glimmer of why the story ended on the scrap heap (or maybe I ought to say you've put your finger on the exact problem I ended up with in writing this). Luckily, JoDancingTree was able to perform resuscitation and make it work. At least, she made it work much better than I was able to manage. Yikes. However, be that as it may, it does serve as a cautionary tale for those who are prone to flying off the handle or making hasty leaps to conclusions...
Belated thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Eirinn Leigh
· 22 November 2015
· Chapter 13: Facts and Fabrications
Ferdi can never come out on top can he? And never taken as the innocent party. Though the idea that the Hobbits, or at least Tooks, hold to 'guilty until proven innocent' is a bit hard to believe.
Author's reply
Considering that the nature of gossip is to mark someone "guilty until proven innocent" - and the Talk of the Tooks is something of a byword, that's sort of how I got from there to here, in a manner of speaking. However, Ferdi's fortunes certainly reversed, not long after the period that this story is set on the timeline, and though he found the change rather bewildering and dismaying at first, he eventually came to enjoy sitting in the catbird seat.
Belated thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Nienor Niniel
· 23 September 2006
· Chapter 35: Whispers
Ooh, I liked that one very much! The set-up was great, and you really had me thinking they would see the punishment through.
The new view on Ferdi's and Pippin's relationship was interesting: that Ferdi hasn't always been fair either. And I like how Faramir is developing.
Greetings, Nienor
Author's reply
Glad you liked it! Some readers loved this stories, and others have told me they hated it. Haven't seen any lukewarm responses. Much of the credit for this story goes to Jodancingtree, for she rescued it from the rubbish heap and breathed new life into it when I'd given it up.
Glad you like seeing Farry's development! He's been an interesting character to imagine, even though I haven't got much past his first year of marriage in my imagining.
Lyta Padfoot
· 4 March 2004
· Chapter 33: Refining Fire
Oh.... new chapter. Makes the next two chapters flow better into the stream of the story.
FantasyFan
· 4 March 2004
· Chapter 33: Refining Fire
I see you've added the chapter with the bonfire. I just assumed that it was background, referred to but not shown. I think it is a good chapter to add, as it you realize that the 'little smoke' was actually a serious attack that Pippin is making light of, and there is great interaction between Pippin and Tolly and Sweetie. She goes from ready to take off both their heads to genuinely concered and moved by Pippin's sincerity. It was important for Pippin to adress the concerns openly: to do more than show the hobbits of the Smials that Ferdi and Tolly are forgiven, to bring it out where everyone can hear, accept blame and to leave the chance for forgiveness or censure to the Tooks. He left it open, and it could have ended up differently, except that he'd already had it all out with the escort and they had no doubt of his conviction and his pledge of loyalty. Brilliant handling of Meadowsweet, to adress her righteous anger and let others tell her that it wasn't Pippin's fault alone. It sounds calculating that way, but the thing is it wouldn't have been successful except that Pippin is truly committed to his pledge, and serves as Thain out of a real love for the Shire and the people. I like the way Pippin and Faramir drew strength from each other during the crisis, remembering their promises and gaining another day. And Meadowsweet's comment about the Thainship wearing Pippin down makes Old Tom's thoughts in the next chapter an echo of the Talk. I really do think it was important for Pippin to give the Tooks something to resolve the crisis and balance the talk, but it also shows that not all concerns are completely put to rest (his health, mostly). Overall, a good addition and makes it more believable that there is no visible tension left between Ferdi, the escort and Pippin by the beginning of Rope, only a few months later.
FantasyFan
· 2 March 2004
· Chapter 35: Whispers
Somehow I managed to miss the previous chapter entirely. Farry is absolutely adorable there. Just the right mix of earnestness and vulnerability and inner strength. I know now he'll be a wonderful hobbit when he grows up, and a worthy sucessor to Pippin. Especially as Pippin will keep his promise, and not lose him again.
I think I'm missing the point in the last chapter. Did Pip and Ferdi just have to get out of the Smials? Their conversation, although it requires privacy, doesn't require salted nuts and cheese cubes (great description of hobbity nibbles, by the way). Ferdi has told Pip he's staying, and if Pippin knows anything he should be sure of Ferdi when he gives his word. I suppose it's a measure of how shook up he's been about everything that's happened that he has to hear it again. But why go to the Spotted Duck to complain about their wives, especially if they are so concerned about being recognized? It doesn't look like they are trying to overhear the talk outside the Smials, though from what the inkeeper and barmaid say, it seems the hobbits there still respect the Thain and look to him for their concerns.
Trust is not an easy thing to rebuild, but I think the Hobbits have it over us in the sincerity of their feelings. It is easier for them to forgive and move on when malice is so foreign and the joys of each day are to be savored. The next story in the chronology is 'Rope', and I don't see mistrust between Pip and Ferdi and the escort by then.
Congratulations to you and Jo for finally finishing this story!
Author's reply
Of course they just had to get out of the Smials. *grin* Imagine being a Took, with people sitting on you to keep you in bed... a bed that will swallow you alive if you stay there another hour. Your wife, thinking you're asleep, takes herself off to late supper--you hear her talking softly in the hallway with another hobbit mum. You carefully arrange a bolster or two in the bed to make it appear that you're still there, listen for an opportune moment when the servants are occupied or gone, muffle yourself in a cloak and creep out... only to encounter another escapee. So off you go together to commiserate.
Author Reply: p.s. Thanks for the review and the congratulations! I truly would have abandoned this story as unworkable had Jo not stepped in. As it was, she reworked the middle and made it possible for me to write the finishing chapters. Whew.
Faramir is certainly a mixed bag of guilt, nobility, and determination in this chapter. Tom's comparison of Farry to a young Pip or Ferdi is interesting. I wonder what a pre-fire Ferdi was like...
Author's reply
He was lively, cheerful, clever, full of more energy than was good for him, engaging, mischievous... though seven years older than Pippin (if I'm remembering right) the two were peas in a pod.
FantasyFan
· 20 February 2004
· Chapter 32: Conversations at Table
That's a bit of an uncomfortable dinner, isn't it? Meadowsweet isn't as forgiving as Tolly is, and I'm not so sure Ferdi is in too forgiving a mood either. The subvocal chatter has quite an edge to it, by all parties. Of course the Tooks are falling out of their chairs to hear what's going on, and for those too far away to listen in, Pip has provided an appropriate visual show. Pippin's making an obvious effort to show everyone that all is well, there is no lingering blame, everything is smoothed over, Ferdi and Tolly are in good graces. The Tooks will take that with a grain of salt, I suppose. Pip ought to be worrying about how they'll view him once the whole story comes out. He's a large serving of humble pie in front of him now, and trust is not so easily rebuilt.
I know you've written the final chapter already - will it go far enough to hear the naming of Nell's babe?
Author's reply
Everyone is slowly settling back into their places but there are a few rough edges left to be gently sanded away before we can put the finishing coat of polish on.
Didn't get around to writing the chapter where Pip had to deal with the truth coming out. It still might be inserted later, or I might leave it up to the imagination. For all practical purposes the story is finished.
Nell's babe has not received a name in this story; am still thinking on it for a future story.
Thanks for reviewing!
Hai
· 20 February 2004
· Chapter 32: Conversations at Table
That was a interesting diversion. I hope that things can regain some of the trust and order between the families of the falsely accused. I keep thinking you are finished with this story and then another chapter is posted! Thank you!
Author's reply
Well, the story is finished now! Just posted chapter 34.
Trust takes time, and there wasn't enough of that to re-establish the relationships in *this* story, but you can see it in "future" stories; so yes, the trust and family order were regained, over time.
Thanks for your comments!
Lyta Padfoot
· 19 February 2004
· Chapter 32: Conversations at Table
The escort seems to be having fun with the Talk.
Author's reply
Very mischievous of them, I think. Wonder how often they play this game?
SoundofHorns
· 19 February 2004
· Chapter 32: Conversations at Table
this is great. i just wish there was more of faramir again! he was such a great little character.
Author's reply
You got a bit more of Faramir in chapter 33, and the last chapter (34), the wrap-up had no Faramir at all, I'm sorry to say. However, he may appear in other stories, you never know. Thanks for commenting!
FantasyFan
· 2 February 2004
· Chapter 31: From One Heart to Another
This is a most satisfying conversation. Diamond is strong, and she's smart too. Even with these few words spoken by Pippin, she understands immediately the truth of what he's saying and its implications. And Pippin is trying his best to keep his promises to Farry, both those spoken and unspoken. He's going to let the lad grow up, and include him in the adult conversation. It's good to see. I wonder though - Diamond says she feels stronger than ever. Is that from the worry being released, or is it a sign that her own babe is soon to be born?
There's one word in here that makes me a little...uncomfortable. There's a lot of talk of dying in this chapter, as well there should be. But Pip says a couple of times that he's buried himself in his work, and that they have left Farry to muddle along while they buried themselves. Really, what they've buried is a baby, but they have not allowed the feelings associated with the loss to be laid to rest. And so talk of buring themselves doesn't ring quite true, though I understand the turn of phrase well enough. Pip has distracted himself with work, and each in his own grief has not attended to the pain of the others. Perhaps what I'm thinking is more to the sense of, they've buried a child, and with it buried some of the family closeness that was in short enough supply before, leaving grief and unspoken blame (or remorse) to linger like a shade. Does that make any sense?
Author's reply
Diamond will not deliver until the Spring (and "Runaway" is set in late November-early December). This is the birth described in the early chapters of "At the End of His Rope".
As to your other comment, I think you are making sense but I'm not sure how to reword the conversation. Have yet another cold and the meds are messing with my mind. Perhaps later when I have a brain again, I can do more than type rough handwritten copy into the computer and put it up for my editor to tweak (and Jo to embroider on).
Hurrah, spring is near and soon I will be past the cold season. That will be a relief.
Lydia
· 2 February 2004
· Chapter 31: From One Heart to Another
Aaaahh, sad and sweet. But I love the last line. When my sister had her baby, my brother in law said when I answered the phone "You're a niece" or some odd thing like that and I about died laughing.
Author's reply
Yes, I must admit I stole that last line from a very old joke. ha.
Grey Wonderer
· 1 February 2004
· Chapter 31: From One Heart to Another
Just lovely as always. I love your Diamond! She has such strength. Thanks for a beautiful chapter.
Author's reply
You're welcome! Thanks for reviewing. Keep thinking good thoughts and maybe thie beastie will come to an end one of these days.
Connie
· 1 February 2004
· Chapter 31: From One Heart to Another
Ah, that is such a sweet chapter. I love it when they're so loving toward each other. I also really admire anyone, especially a male, who can admit when they're wrong and ask forgiveness.
I could say a whole lot more, but I'll leave it at that for now.
Connie.
Author's reply
Thanks for reviewing, Connie! Glad you liked the chapter. Pippin is in an unusually reflective mood at the moment, eating quantities of humble pie and making quite a brave job of it. I'm sure it'll be a relief to him to put this business behind and get on with life. Perhaps he's learned a bit about curbing his impulsiveness in the bargain. That's all to the good.
FantasyFan
· 11 January 2004
· Chapter 30: Arrival
I wonder if the appelation 'devious' ought to be applied to Ferdi instead of Pippin? Clearly he didn't drink the sleeping draught, but poured out almost all of it while Nell's back was turned, leaving just enough for show, or perhaps just enough to dull the pain. His plan was to get rid of the healer and then have time to explain what happened to Nell?
Plans don't always work out - he ought to know that very well right about now. That is one of the fastest births I've ever heard of. I know that she had been staving off labor for a while, and even on bed rest she probably had been progressing a bit. I've heard of many women walking around for a couple of weeks dilated to a few centimeters. And Nell has had a number of children (I really don't have a good idea how many, but at least four?) so she's not going to linger in the early stages, but this sounds like the entire labor is about ten minutes long. You labeled this a draft - if you're planning to revise it more, perhaps you could throw a contraction to two in the earlier part that Nell can ignore, or even at the end of the previous chapter, to make the labor ongoing? It would give Ferdi a very good reason to dispose of the sleeping draught too. Or was that the thought all along, he saw what was happening and didn't want to miss another birth? He is very observant, though not as much so when his head is splitting.
Author's reply
Well, we had a birth locally during the big ice storm, and the normal 8 minute time for paramedics to arrive at a certain address was doubled. From the time the mom went into the bathroom and realised she was in labour until the baby was born was about 10 minutes. The grandmother did the actual delivery while a 9-1-1 operator talked her through it. They used a shoelace from the grandfather's running shoe to tie the umbilitcal cord! All in all an amazing story.
Nell has been in labour for days, and is probably getting pretty good at ignoring the contractions until she cannot ignore them...
Anyhow, have inserted a warning cramp right after Nell soothes Ferdi to sleep (at least, temporary sleep). Does that help the credibility?