Reviews (181)

French Pony · 19 March 2007 · Chapter 3: Meetings

Ah, look at that. Legolas, Annael and Turgon. Truly a meeting for the ages. The boat thing sounds like lots of fun. Now, Siondel was one of Eilian's friends, right? That's how he would recognize Annael. Seems like the universal response to going to a funeral is to bring food. That seems to be a universal thing. After the funeral, a feast, to remind us that we're still alive, after all. Uncle Bernie's funeral was on Erev Yom Kippur, and we had the big feast anyway.

French Pony · 19 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

Okay, it's appropriately dark outside, and I am free of homework for the rest of the week. Time to read! I liked the sense of the Shadow as a palpable Thing, twisting around and creeping into Elves and trees as if it had a will of its own. Tolkien likes to pair up good and evil creatures such that each good creature has its own evil parody -- Elves and Orcs, Ents and Trolls, Hobbits and Gollum, I guess -- and the Shadow seems like that kind of evil parody of the tree chorus. I also like the sense of Thranduil sort of semiconsciously being an imposing presence. Clearly, that's a mask that Eilian has trouble approaching, and Thranduil either cannot or will not turn it off when dealing with Eilian. No wonder they have problems with each other. And it seems that Elves are forever vulnerable to holes opening up in the ground.

meckinock · 19 March 2007 · Chapter 3: Meetings

Poor Eilian. It must have been torture, listening to his father and Ithilden debating a course of action and forcing himself to keep silent. Yay for Maltanaur. I don't blame Eilian for varnishing the facts. There was no point to inflicting a cruel truth that only had the power to hurt. And here is Legolas with his new little friends. Turgon is already showing much potential for instigating trouble. Of course he wants to go out into the river. I'm surprised he didn't! And I love seeing how Legolas worships his big brother.

Manderly · 19 March 2007 · Chapter 3: Meetings

Ah, what kids could do with a bit of tree bark and imagination! Even at this age, the differing personalities of the three friends are already emerging. Good thing Eilian came along or it might have been elflings bumping along the river rather than just the boats. Turgon's nana is proving herself to be an accomplished space cadet already. The elflings could have sailed all the way to Numenor before she would even notice anything amissed. Guess Lorellin didn't know what risk she was taking when she left Legolas with Mirdaniel. Quite contrasting images of warriors discussing orc problems and the elflings at play. I am glad the innocence of childhood has not been stolen from these elfings, yet.

Gwynhyffar · 19 March 2007 · Chapter 3: Meetings

Legolas is adorable here, and it's the lovely beginning of a great friendship and lots of trouble. Lorellin needs to stay home and not go visit her relatives. Tell her to stay home!!!

elliska · 19 March 2007 · Chapter 3: Meetings

Poor Eilian. You do have to feel for him at times like this. He (somewhat justifiably) feels he has important information and important skills that are being dismissed. And as Lorellin observes, no one in the House of Oropher is good at listening to too much talking. I feel for him here. And I admit I couldn't help looking ahead to read the whole part with the children because I was so worried about Legolas being left with Turgon and the river and a neglectful nana supervising. That was a recipe for disaster and it nearly ended in one. Poor little Annael, though. I am glad Eilian saved his boat. And I love how you wove in little bits like Turgon's father missing his audience as a minstrel (almost succeeded in making me sorry for him) and his mother being too scattered to find such important letters.

obsidianj · 19 March 2007 · Chapter 3: Meetings

So, Legolas found his later friends. Even this young their personalities are already there. Annael more thoughtful before doing anything and Turgon head first coming up with harebrained schemes. Legolas kind of in the middle. Is he the youngest of the three? I forgot their ages. And Eilian fuelling the childrens imagination by walking on hidden stones in the water. I'm waiting for Turgon to try this trick and falling into the river.

rikki · 19 March 2007 · Chapter 3: Meetings

Annael and Turgon. What a wonderful beginning to a long and deep friendship between the three elflings. Though it sounds like Mirdaniel is a real spacey elf. She has letters for Lorellin and yet hasn't even thought about looking for them. And her supervision of her son and his friends at the river had me gritting my teeth. How one of them didn't end up swimming in the river is probably a minor miracle. Eilian came at a good time to find Legolas though he may have accidently provided a future adventure for Turgon. Because I just know that he is going to go find those rocks in the river. Annael may stay on the shore, but I have a feeling Legolas is going to be right behind Turgon. How comforting and traditional in taking food to the grieving family. But how does one convey sympathy in Lorellin's situation while speaking to Helith about Fithral? Maybe she couldn't say something profound, but I think by being there she has transcinded being Queen making a visit and become a Mother who understands the love one has for a son. It is sad knowing that someday the roles are reversed and it is the love of a son for his Mother who has died.

Lianna · 19 March 2007 · Chapter 3: Meetings

Considering how flaky his mom is and how badly she is supervising these little kids near water, it's surprising that Turgon survived as long as he did!

Jay of Lasgalen · 19 March 2007 · Chapter 3: Meetings

The scene in Fithral's house was heartbreaking. The depth of agony his parents and brother felt was so sad, but so true. I think it was harsh to criticise Eilan for the lie that Fithral died quickly - a lie he probably wants to believe himself - when Lorellin tells a similar lie when she claims to know how Fithral's parents feel. Eilian's lie is far better than telling the truth in this case. Turgon's mother is a rather useless guardian for three adventurous elflings, isn't she?

erunyauve · 19 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

>>His mother took up her knitting, and Eilian eased back on the bench, sipping his wine. The fire was warm and the clicking of his mother's knitting needles was soothing. Perhaps he would not go out tonight after all. He felt as sleepy as Legolas, as if he might be able to sleep the night through without stumbling onto a dream path crowded with terror. There's something about the unexpectedness, and the way things weren't as they seemed, that makes Fithral's death more horrible. I'm also guessing that there wasn't much left for the warriors to recover. For Legolas, though, he's still young enough not to understand much, or have a real concept of death, so it's natural for him be awed and quiet at the funeral and able to forget it quickly.

pipinheart · 19 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

I like that you seen this through Eilian eyes. Thranduil is trying to help him, its one of thier more reasonable talks as well. Eilian is taking this hard, and it is possible that he too has shadow sickness, though he'd never admit it to anyone. I loved the drescription of the trees that was covered in shadow, nice work... Update soon, this is nice...

Brenda G. · 18 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

Daw, I have been out of circulation for a very long time now (two back-to-back moves and lots happening on the home front), but I was so delighted to look up this site again after my lengthy absence away and see this story by you. As usual (and always), I am hooked from word one and ready for more stories from you as quickly as you can churn them out. Your writing just gets better and better. Oh, how I have missed this! I noticed in reviews of the first chapter that you talked about working on a "second novel" which means (I conclude) that you have written a first? If so, how in the world can I get my hands on it? I've always maintained that you should collect your stories into a book. Is that what you have done or does this first novel stand alone? If you have written a novel, I cannot express my joy to see this personal dream of yours fulfilled. Equally, I cannot express the urgency of my need to have, hold, devour from cover to cover, and treasure forever a copy of this fabled work. When you have time, please email me all of the delicious details of your first outing. You are a marvel to me and your work like little miracles that brighten and bless and drive the Shadow away. I'm looking forward to the next installment of The Seeds of Time. Your Lorellin is enchanting. Hope you are well. B.G.

Idhreniel · 18 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

Wow... what a terrible death indeed. Thranduil was very accesible to Ellian this time. It must be hard for him to hear his son talking about such a scene. It was a sad chapter, but the way you write about those characters is amazing.

White Wolf · 18 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

When Legolas said, "Nana said this was for Fithral, but where was he? Which warrior was he?", I cringed right along with Eilian. It really brings home how children have their own view of things, doesn't it? Eilian's story about the Shakow and Fithral's death was well done and made me shudder. I think being pulled down into a hole by horrid creatures would terrify me beyond words. A sad but well done chapter.

Idhreniel · 18 March 2007 · Chapter 1: Homecoming

Oh, it's great to read from you again! This time you gave us the queen to read... nice. I like her and the way she snapped at Thranduil. Someone who he allows to face him hehe.

Dot · 18 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

Great chapter, daw. The funeral scene was very well done. I thought it was interesting that even as Eilian thinks about how he’s glad he doesn’t have the weight of responsibility that his brother and father must bear, it’s still duty that he struggles with. But more than duty as king’s son or warrior to his people, there’s what he seems to feel is his duty as wood-elf to the forest. I loved the little details to show us how the others are feeling – Thranduil’s “public” face, Ithilden’s straight back, Legolas’ wide eyes and Lorellin’s scanning of the trees. It really is sad that Legolas knows the words of the song of mourning – and it very poignantly suggests that it’s a song with which most of the Woodland Realm are familiar. Poor Gelmir :-( The heartbreakingly small wrapped bundle of Fithral's bones. Oh God. That’s heartbreaking. I was torn between wanting to know what happened to him and really, really not wanting to know. He looked away into the smoke-smudged trees. That’s a gorgeous description. "You may lean on me any time, Naneth, though to me, it still feels the other way around." That’s really sweet. And I think her way of offering support to a son who doesn’t want to need it is by asking for it for herself. I actually had tears in my eyes at Legolas’ questions about Fithral. He’s very literal, as small children are. It must be so hard for his parents to have to explain death to a child when really the only way his people die is as the result of evil. "Alas, at present my stories are out of favor, and your naneth's are the truly desirable ones." I loved that! It’s a great glimpse of a real family unit and family life. And the easy way in which Eilian notes Thranduil’s tiredness suggests people more comfortable in each other’s presence than we see later. "I know." Thranduil's face was impassive, but Eilian believed his father did know. Body and spirit, he was so connected to the Woodland Realm he probably felt the twisting of each tree. In the face of his father's stolid endurance, Eilian felt like Legolas whining over a skinned knee. I thought that was really moving. I love the idea that Thranduil’s tie to the forest is that deep but it’s quite distressing to think how that which gives him his power must also cause great suffering as darkness spreads through it. Mmm, I love your Thranduil… Though Eilian shouldn’t be so hard on himself. He’s a wood-elf and he’s out there every day. It’s no wonder he’s affected and he needs to know it’s ok to be. I was glad to see Eilian give in and talk to Thranduil. But what a horrific time he’s had :-/ He opened his mouth to give the order, then bit back the words. Todith had told them to take care. He should muster his small patience and follow the safer course of action. Ooh, that’s interesting! It seems Eilian once upon a time was learning to control himself and not act impulsively until his world turned upside down. The descriptions of the Shadow and of the choking, rotting woods were just amazing. It felt so heavy and stifling to me. I’ve never seen the Shadow seem such a tangible presence either. It was incredibly well done. The difference when they emerge from the area touched by Shadow gave me such a sense of relief. I hadn’t realised I was holding my breath along with Eilian until I released it again when he came into the sweeter air and birdsong! But that whole section really was so tense. I was wondering what they could have missed and where the orcs were gone. I’d swear my heart stopped for a second when Eilian realised that they were in tunnels. I was torn then between thinking how clever yet horrifying that was! A twisted maple slowly tilted, its branches stretched out to the other trees as if pleading to be held, its roots tearing away and rearing up like a gigantic, spiked shield. Everything seemed to be sliding toward a hole collapsing into the forest floor. Everything, including Fithral. *covers eyes* Oh God, that’s sickening. I can’t even think about it. Or about what they found when they went into the tunnels later. But you did a great job, daw. You really showed the reality what these warriors face. "And you conclude I have let the Shadow damage me? I thought that really showed how Eilian seems to think it would be a personal weakness to let the Shadow affect him. He is so sympathetic towards Gelmir but he doesn’t want to think that he could possibly allow himself to be so weak. The only thing is that he’s naturally quite upbeat and energetic so if he gets to spend some time away from the Shadow and with his family – always assuming he can overcome his guilt at not being there to fight for his home every minute of the day – he might recover quickly. I was glad anyway to see him draw some comfort from Thranduil. But everyone in his family has something to offer him if he just gives in and accepts it. I’m loving this. More please :-)

Gwynhyffar · 17 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

Poor Eilian. He is so concerned with infecting others than he can't really look out for himself. Thranduil, Elbereth love him, just can't keep from rubbing Eilian the wrong way. Even when he's worried about Eilian, he can't really step away from the authoritarian in himself. That seems to haunt him when it comes to Eilian and even Legolas a bit. The thought of orc tunnels makes me sick. When I was reading the bit about going into the tunnels, I was thinking of Shelob's lair and that... well, at the risk of being too gross... smell of rot. It's an overwhelming sick smell that you never forget once you've experienced it. You even taste it for a few days when you try to eat. Oops, I wasn't going to be too gross! At any rate, I feel for Eilian having to go in there. I also feel bad that Legolas is finding himself in the position of having realm responsibilities placed upon him so young. Even if he didn't fully comprehend what was going on, I'm sure it will affect him. Good job as always, Daw.

obsidianj · 17 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

That was a sad story Eilian had to tell. I like the way you describe the shadow. Makes me shudder.

perelleth · 17 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

This troubled relationship between Eilian and Thranduil is so interesting. THrnaduil will never ever let pass a minor slip of tongue and Eilian always reacts badly fearing that his Adar is judging him. Even with Lorellin alive it is sad to see how difficult it is for these two to have a peaceful relationship. NOw poor Eilian and poor Gelimir, no wonder they are both affected, that was surely a very distressing experience. Being home will make him good.

Elena Tiriel · 17 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

Hi Daw, Just a note to let you know how much I am enjoying this, even more now that Eilian is featured.... Thank you for sharing it with us. - Barbara

perelleth · 17 March 2007 · Chapter 1: Homecoming

Two chapters on a row for me! WE know this family so well that LOrellin comes as a welcome stranger. They are all truly familiar except for herself, yet it is so good to see her in her place among them, and to glimpse how life was when she was there. I loved how she calmed Ithilden and how she knew what was wrong with Eilian...while you keep an eye on Legolas´point of view... I loved his interest in what Annael and the other boy were doing, and how very small LEgolas still is that he is afraid of the river being angry! That was a lovely touch! NOw I am going for the second one!

Manderly · 17 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

The encounter with the orcs gave me shivers. What a horrific death for Fithral, something which will no doubt bring on night after night of nightmares for his comrades who witnessed his death. Amazing description of the Shadow. I could almost feel it creeping onto me. Must be so heartbreaking for the elves to see it encroaching onto their beloved trees and befouling the air that they breathe. So sad that as young as Legolas is, he is already experiencing death and mourning. I wonder how that would affect his notion of the immortality of elves.

sofia · 17 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

Good chapter. Sheesh... that was NOT a good way to die at all. Poor Fithral! No wonder Eilian is getting nightmares. Little Legolas and big brother Eilian are too cute, I bet Legolas will tire him to the bone with the plans he has. I was reading through your other reviews when I came across Jess's and her question about your story See the Stars. And when I read that you had considered deleting that story I have to say "DON'T! Please don't!"

The Karenator · 17 March 2007 · Chapter 2: Funeral

I'm so far behind with reviewing.... Doesn't life know I have better things to do, like read and review stories? How incredibly rude. I missed reviewing Chapter One, so I'll just summarize with a hearty 'squee'. Chapter Two: intense. My favorite part was the creativity of the orc tunnels. I really liked that. And the sinkhole. Oh, man. How awful for everyone. I can see why Eilian would be slightly off balance. There's nothing worse than feeling helpless and that situation was terrible. I don't even want to think about why the bundle at the funeral was so small. Oh dear... I also loved the description of the forest in the south. The leaves being tinged with slime and curling into themselves was very vivid. The whole scene was haunting. I could hear the stillness and feel the heaviness of evil. Well done, your minstrelship. I'm slow with reviews, but I'm trying to catch up on reading and reviewing. Don't give up on me. I always love your stories and this one is no exception. Did I mention my fangurl squee? :>)