Isilhen Daegol
· 5 October 2005
· Chapter 1: A Summer Race
Hmmm... An interesting start... You've done a good job with portraying Gil as an unlikeable character. And Frodo is sweet and smart as ever. OC's aren't a bad thing. Edon seems fairly nice. Good job... And I vote for the wind.
Author's reply
I would say wind also, as I did almost have a strong gust of wind knock me over once.
Gil is quite the bully here. His rivalry with Edon doesn't bring out the best in him. Edon can sympathize with Frodo, which is why he lets Frodo tag along. It helps that Frodo is a bit of a trouble maker, even if he is sweet and smart.
RenaissanceGrrl
· 5 October 2005
· Chapter 2: Memories Stir
I know that Sara is the logical nickname for Saradoc and that Sarah wasn't a name in their language, but every time I read a fic where Saradoc is referred to as such, it catches me off guard. ^_^
wee!Merry! *WaFF*
For some reason having the flashback in italics made me think of the little sound effect they play for flashbacks on Lost. Lol...
NOW the OCs have my attention. I still don't understand the full connection between their story and Frodo's, but I'm extremely curious as to what's going to HAPPEN to them. ^_^
Author's reply
I've seen Doc used as a nickname for Saradoc, but that always brings up images of Bugs Bunny munching on a carrot for me. ^_^
As I so often do, you won't see the connection until the very end of the story, and it's not necessarily a direct connection. The OCs wound up having a story of their own to tell, and it will help Frodo later on, as Frodo's story will help theirs.
Glad I have your attention though. :)
RenaissanceGrrl
· 5 October 2005
· Chapter 1: A Summer Race
I think my favorite part thus far was the bit where it mentioned that Frodo thought of Merry as a brother. I think that relationship tends to get overlooked (even, admittedly, by me) in the light of the Frodo/Sam and Merry/Pippin friendships. (Well, okay, Merry and Pip are cousins, but you know what I mean.)
Frodo is so sweet and so smart. *fights fangirlishness and leaves a REAL review*
I can understand why you were nervous; it's a lot of OCs in a small amount of time, but you handled it very well--just enough characterization so that I'm interested, but not so much that it's difficult to keep track of who's who. I'm still unclear as to WHY there needs to be so many of them, but I'm sure that'll become obvious as the story unfolds. ^_^
Good beginning!
Author's reply
I've always thought that Frodo, Merry and Pippin think of themselves more as brothers than cousins, and have mentioned it in previous writings. Merry especially will grow up seeing Frodo as an older brother, which will make Frodo's leaving so hard for him.
The problem Frodo has is realizing his own worth and abilities. It's a problem that will plague him the rest of his life, but especially now at this time, when he's in such a vulnerable state.
I'm glad this chapter didn't give you OC-overload, lol. As to why there has to be OCs, it's the same reason I stated in the prologue. A glance at the Brandybuck family tree shows that there aren't any other children close to Frodo's age. The younger ones either haven't been born yet or are toddlers and infants. The older ones, Frodo would see more as authority figures, since they are all past their coming of age. As such, Frodo wouldn't be friends with them. Hence, the need for OCs. ^_^
Bodkin
· 4 October 2005
· Chapter 2: Memories Stir
Not a happy hobbit. It's interesting to see what most upset Frodo. And that he is struggling to conceal his emotions from those round him. He is nowhere near back to stability after his parents' deaths, whatever he might pretend.
And Gil and Edon. Squaring off to each other and baying as their testosterone-poisoning takes over. What a pair of . . . of tweenagers!
Author's reply
Frodo has a long way to go before he can go on with his life. Trying to hide how he feels and not talking about his fears is only making it worse for him. Esme and Saradoc notice more than they let on, but they too are struggling - with a child who doesn't truly trust them and with not really knowing how to give him the comfort he needs. They are just newly parents themselves, and the role of Frodo's guardian was rather thrust upon them. It's taking them all a long time to adjust.
Those hormones! lol Though there is a lot more to Gil and Edon's rivalry that just tween horomoes run amok. :)
Periantari
· 3 October 2005
· Chapter 2: Memories Stir
I love this story so far~ an interesting selection of names you've picked for the OFCs. ;) Gil is interesting "mean guy" of the group and what he said to Frodo was so mean in the other chapter.
Nice angst in this one~ awww poor Frodo! THe part where he was about to find out and of him reminiscing about his parents was oh so sad. :(
I can't wait for more... especially to see what spurns Frodo to go into the Forest.
Author's reply
Hello Peri! I'm glad you're enjoying this so far. Gil did go overboard. That he realizes that speaks a lot about him, as does Edon's actions say a lot about him as well.
Frodo will be having many memories plague him throughout this story, some sad, some frightening, and some happy. If he pays attention, he might learn something from them. ;)
It will be awhile before Frodo disappears, and then a bit longer before we find out why. ^_^
Dreamflower
· 3 October 2005
· Chapter 2: Memories Stir
Poor Frodo; it's just so hard for him to have to realize that others have moved on from the depths of grief while he has not. And you have depicted his fear very well. A child who loses a parent to an unexpected tragedy never has the same kind of security in the world again.
I'm interested in the friendship/rivalry of the two lads Gil and Ebon. It seems to me there is a little more there than just both of them wanting the same lass. I get the feeling there's a lot more history to it than that...
Author's reply
Frodo lost a lot more than anyone else did when his parents died, and with him being so young, it has taken longer than it normally would for him to come to terms with it. In fact, he never really does come to terms with it.
Stability and security are so important growing up and losing that can have drastic effects on anyone at any age, but especially one so young. Frodo's always had a rough road to travel. Understandably, he's become a worrier and is always afraid of what might be right around the corner, though he does a good job of hiding it most times.
We'll be finding out more about Edon and Gil as the story goes on. There is more to this than meets the eye, but as often happens with rivalries, they tend to focus on the "Yoko factor" - what appears to have broken the friendship rather than what actually did break them apart.
Came home from a long day and found a bedtime chapter waiting! I loved this one. So much background on Frodo and his relationship with Esmeralda and Saradoc as well as his love for Merry! The flashback was so sad and so well written. I am really enjoying your OC too! More soon!
Author's reply
Glad this was able to perk you up after a long day. :) Poor Frodo isn't having a good time of it right now. He's been putting on a decent act for a long time, but now he's having to face some things he's been avoiding. I feel sorry for Esme and Saradoc also; they're trying so hard to love and comfort someone who just isn't able to receive that right now. Flashbacks will abound in this fic, so there's something else to look forward to. :)
And thanks for the boost about my OCs. I'm still a bit nervous about them, but they're doing their part well.
The Hobbit Waffle
· 2 October 2005
· Chapter 2: Memories Stir
Poor poor Frodo. I really love your interpretation of him, because in my head it is the closest one to my own interpretation. I've never found in the fanfiction world except in your stories. :D
Angst makes me happy, which is really rather cruel. I am ashamed.
Author's reply
Dreamflower had a lot to do with how I think of and write Frodo. He was a bit elusive to me until I started reading her works. I enjoy a good angst story also, they are fun to read. :)
Bodkin
· 2 October 2005
· Chapter 1: A Summer Race
Gil isn't winning many points with me, however impressed Fuchsia is. He appears an arrogant bully boy. Frodo was remarkably brave to stand up to him - but he might have taken on a bit more than he can chew at the moment.
This is a really interesting start - I look forward to seeing more of Frodo at a very delicate time in his development.
Author's reply
Gil isn't seen in his best light here. First impressions are hard to recover from.
Frodo has always been one to come to a friend's defense, usually without much thought to himself. He paid for his interference here and that will make him think twice in the future.
The next chapter will be have a lot more Frodo in it, and will be posted shortly. :) I'm glad you're enjoying this so far. Thanks for reading!
TheHobbitWaffle
· 1 October 2005
· Chapter 1: A Summer Race
I love it! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Poor Frodo. Standing up to Gil, and getting his fears rubbed in face. If I was there, Gil wouldn't have been so cocky! Though really I have the weakest punch ever and the most I could do to anyone is sit on them...
You are so amazingly talented, I can only hope that one day I'm as good as you. And I swear, I am not sucking up to you. *Bows at the alter of Gamgeefest*
Author's reply
Thank you! I'm glad you're enjoying it so far. :)
Frodo isn't the type to let a friend be picked on, even when he was so young. Gil wasn't very graceful about the interruption, but considering Edon's presence, it is perhaps understandable why he acted the way he did.
*hugs TheHobbitWaffle*
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2005
· Chapter 1: A Summer Race
This is a very interesting beginning. I hope it will turn into something very long and exciting...like "A Tale that Grew in the Telling".
So, I take it that Gil's going to egg Frodo on til he goes in, or has Frodo already decided he wants to, and is simply biding his chance?
Guess I'll have to stay tuned...
Author's reply
Oh dear! This story *did* get away from me, but not *that* much. "A Tale" continues to hold the record of Biggest Runaway Plot, lol. This story is one half of a before/after series, so when you add in the follow up story, it comes out to about 2/3 of "A Tale"'s length, chapter-wise.
I'm glad you find this interesting. Without giving away too much, Gil and Edon will both have a hand to play in the events to follow. It will be awhile yet before Frodo disappears though.
Grey Wonderer
· 1 October 2005
· Chapter 1: A Summer Race
Good first chapter. I can see Frodo as the sort who goes about with older lads much like Pippin does later. I liked the way that Frodo stood up Gil and called him on his lies in defense of his friend. I wonder where Frodo was really supposed to be while he was at the races? Looking forward to more.
Author's reply
Unlike Pippin, who pursues the older lads until he badgers them into letting him tag along, Frodo typically just finds himself suddenly in there company. He is a bit reckless and that sometimes works to his advantage, and it sometimes doesn't.
Unbeknownst to Frodo, everyone knew Gil was lying. Old Forest stories are the Shire equivalent of urban legends. Gil wasn't the first to tell that story and he won't be the last! Had Frodo been in the company of anyone else, Gil wouldn't have even given him the time of day.
Grey Wonderer
· 1 October 2005
· Chapter 0
I enjoy a bit of nervous rambling from time to time. It usually means that a good story is about to begin. I was looking for something to read and here it is!
Author's reply
Just be glad I stopped myself short at that! lol I hope this story lives up to expectation.