Elly
· 10 October 2003
· Chapter 5: Lying and Pretending
Hi there!
Just to say that this is wonderful. It's good - and unusual - to see a hobbit story in which all is not perfect, and there are disagreements and misunderstanding. You make Merry and Pippin flawed, while staying convincingly true to the books, and keeping them utterly sympathetic. And Faramir is a lovely creation. Your prose style is very fine, too.
I'll be coming back often to see when the next chapters are up!
I'm now off to look at your other stories... *grin*
Elly
Jesslotr
· 7 October 2003
· Chapter 5: Lying and Pretending
I am really enjoying this series.. i cannot wait for the next part
FantasyFan
· 2 October 2003
· Chapter 5: Lying and Pretending
I don't know if I have reviewed any of the chapters of your story either here at SoA or over at ff.n, but I have been reading and enjoying them.
This is an interesting take on Pippin's and Merry's friendship. They are not nearly as sure of each other as in most stories you read. Certainly, they've shared experiences no one else in the Shire can understand (except maybe Sam), but time and responsibility seem to have pushed them apart. Pippin still thinks Merry is the bravest knight ever, and Merry still feels like the older brother, but he also thinks Pippin is thoughtless to the point of irresponsibility at times, and Pippin is quite hurt that Merry doesn't confide his fears to him. I'm not sure whether Faramir is helping or not right now. He's a focus for anxiety for Merry as a phantom of what might have been, as well as a gentler reminder of how things used to be when Pippin was young. Perhaps he'll end up being a catalyst for the two old friends to renew some of their closeness.
By the way, I don't think this chapter was too long at all. It finished when what you had to say was over. That's always the perfect length for a chapter. I thought the description of Frodo as a ghostly pawn was inspired. Made me shiver. And it was quite sad to think of the nursery, lovingly furnished for how many years, waiting for someone to need it. Now Pip knows why Merry was scared, though I'm sure he's still hurt that Merry couldn't share his fear and grief. I'll be looking for the next chapter.
Miriel
· 2 October 2003
· Chapter 5: Lying and Pretending
I liked all the dialogue. Somehow the story becomes more personal that way as opposed to simply reading about the events.
Yes, the Hobbits were pawns. I appriciated the sybolism.
How interesting that Farry really, really, dislikes his father. My, but Pippin is neglectful.
I hope that Merry and Pippin straighten everything out soon. (And that Farry doesn't beat Merry to the top of the "mountain", although that would be very humerous!) Update soon!
jodancingtree
· 17 September 2003
· Chapter 4: Holed Up
What a marvelous story! You've made Faramir such a personality, I just love him -- and Merry trying to live up to his nickname -- wonderful! And the title is perfect. Waiting eagerly for more chapters --
jo
Miriel
· 17 September 2003
· Chapter 4: Holed Up
I'm so glad that you posted so soon.
Poor Faramir. Shame on Pippin for telling him that he didn't have any sense. I enjoyed Merry's fumblings on childbirth. (Oh, wait, no, Faramir didn't ask yet how the baby comes out. LOL. :)
I wonder how much longer until Merry finally blows up at Pippin. (You know that one is coming.) Pippin...*sigh* I wouldn't mind seeing a little Diamond interaction as well, from what I've heard it sounds like she would be a "fun" guest. (Fun for us readers maybe!)
UPdate soon!
Miriel
· 2 September 2003
· Chapter 3: Taking Stock
Oh, hooray! I've been checking almost daily to see if you had updated. I truly love this story and I think that your portrayal of all the charcters is perfect. I feel sorry for Faramir, ppor kid. Anyway, please, please, please update soon, and I will eagerly await your next chapter!
shirebound
· 1 September 2003
· Chapter 3: Taking Stock
I don't think my ff.net review went through (error message, sigh), so I'll leave it here:
Ha! I love this --
Both Merry and Pippin opened their mouths to speak, but Faramir beat them to it.
"Will they have to stand on the table?" He asked, looking quite excited by the prospect.
"We’d probably have more luck if I was standin’ on the table..."
Your Opal is a formidable and wonderful character! This story is very creative and well written.
(Is there any way to clean up the formatting a bit for the ff.net version? The beginning and end of the chapter are pretty scrunched together.)
Lindelea
· 18 August 2003
· Chapter 2: From Potatoes to Turtles
O, indeed, more than a promising beginning, chapter 2 lives up to the promise of chapter 1 and expands upon it1 Looking forward to more!
Lindelea
· 18 August 2003
· Chapter 1: Tooks in Pockets
A very promising beginning! I particularly loved these turns of phrase:
He sunk deep into the water and tilted his head back, so that soon he was up to his neck, only his chin sticking out like a small cliff above the seas.
It was a testament, many said, to the Faramir’s character that he had not turned out either spoiled or strange.
My only question, I'm a little puzzled. If Pippin disguised himself as a terribly fat, hunch-backed hobbit, why then did he have to bribe his way across Westfarthing? Who was he bribing? And why?
Miriel
· 5 August 2003
· Chapter 2: From Potatoes to Turtles
I love it! I'm going to go make sure that it is "In progress" because it is most certainly not complete! I can't wait to finish it!
Kit5
· 5 August 2003
· Chapter 2: From Potatoes to Turtles
I shall review here as well!
This might not be the image of Pippin that we all love and cherish, but it's clear that he loves his son, no matter how mystified he might be by him.
And Merry-he'll never stop taking care of Pippin, against, perhaps, his better judgment. I hope everything turns out okay. I will be waiting for updates!