Too impatient to sign in. I'm reading this after years and years and years, and it is still so very good. If you ever bend your mind back here and back to these elves, I'd give an arm and a leg to see this complete.
Also, hello. :D
Author's reply
Ah, hello old friend! Quite a surprise to get a review on this old story. It still pokes me, from time to time. I'd probably have to read LotR, the Silm, and Unfinished Tales again to remember what I was talking about! One of these days, though ....
eHiyAskainLjZaQ
· 31 May 2012
· Chapter 10: The Last Alliance
That's a smart way of thniknig about it.
Redheredh
· 28 November 2006
· Chapter 12: Victory
!!**Happy Dance**!!
These chapter openings with Sauron (your version of him rocks) are always so arresting and entertaining! I really enjoyed getting a glimpse at his human general's problematic service. And getting that fellow's perspective on Gil-galad's strategy.
Yay! for the return of bonnie Calandil!
Little Valandil is an absolutely wonderful character through which to view this not-quite final victory. Certainly Estel's predecessor in a long line of fostered princes. Seeing Celeborn/Calandil in Elrond/Glorfindel's role was very satisfying - establishing the pattern, so to speak. Poor Valandil, though. So young to have witnessed the sorrow of the elves and to be embarrassed about his fellow mortals. You made him a very real boy, vigorously running about and pulling at his collar. But, mostly by having him share his innocent heart.
Celborn's insightful remarks about the next generation accusing his kind of not setting the ills of world right during their turn, as he accused the Valar, had me nodding at its sad eternal truth.
What a neat way to announce the not-victory having each person feel it within the way of his own nature!
Ah, the fair, perilous Lady! The child's reaction was so pure, astonishment - not fear. Will it be the same when he is grown? You do both Lord and Lady justice in your depiction of them. Lovely reunion.
And having you post here again is a lovely reunion, as well. Your writing is such a great treat to read. Always leaves one craving more. :)
Author's reply
Thanks, Redheredh. A dose of LotR from my roommate this weekend, as well as the unexpected appearance of some old online friends in my life (like you, for example) helped get this chapter off the ground at last. Glad you enjoyed it.
Yes, Sauron. He remains facinating. Fun to write a character who is just plain evil, without trying to come up with excuses for him or be nuanced. He is who he is, and proud of it :)
Glad you enjoyed Valandil. It was a change for me writing a young character. I had to work with him for a while to get him to settle into it. When you write characters who are thousands of years old, it can be tough to nail an eleven year old in a way that is believable. (Especially since I don't know many eleven year olds). I'm glad to hear that it was successful.
So glad you picked up on Celeborn's comment about not righting the ills of the world when he had the chance. That's going to be a theme for a while.
This was the best way I could think of to write the end of the war and Isildur's taking of the ring. I really didn't want to rehash that familiar episode. Coming to some clear way of acknowledging such a major event without having to write it really fouled me up for a long time. This works, I think.
Thanks so much for your kind comments, and for sticking with this story despite the embarrassingly long delay. I have some new direction and excitement for moving forward, and I'm recommitting to writing this story. So here is hoping for chapters a little closer together than annually :)
Bodkin
· 28 November 2006
· Chapter 12: Victory
Not easy to get away from Sauron once he's got you in his power. And what a campaign. For sheer nastiness, it couldn't have been much worse, really.
I love Valandil, though. I sense future echoes of his descendant - that semi-orphaned Dunadan at the end of another age. Brought up with elves and having to relearn his place among men. And aren't boys always like this - longing to grow up and take their place among the warriors, while their carers want to keep them as children for those last precious days. Calandil is lovely - and makes an excellent substitute father. One willing to delay his reunion with his wife because the boy needed him.
The reunion of Celeborn and Galadriel is absolutely beautiful. So understated and yet gleaming with joy. I should think the echoes of it are ringing throughout Imladris.
I was so thrilled to see this - and I love Valandil's perspective on the events that ended an age. I'm looking forward to when you get a chance to move this further forward. Such a treat.
Author's reply
Sauron's certainly not getting any nicer. I find I still enjoy writing him, just for that reason :)
Valandil is an interesting character who serves as a nice parallel for a lot of things. Estel's predecessor, certainly. He is also a boy who is about to have his father's kingship shoved onto him--not unlike Amroth's situation. The more I worked with him in this chapter, the more he was exactly the right character to move this story forward. It just took me forever to figure that out.
I adore Calandil as well. I find that he is an amalgum of many of the strong, wise (and teasing) men of my childhood.
I must admit, the reunion was my favorite part of this chapter :) Those two get to me every time.
Thanks so much for reviewing, and for sticking with me despite the embarassingly long gap between chapters. The next is already half written, with more ideas coming, and I'm excited to move forward again as I haven't been in some time. So stay tuned :)
perelleth
· 28 November 2006
· Chapter 12: Victory
Well, it was well worth the wait indeed. I am always awed by how easily you draw the ethereal quality of elves while picturing them as strong, powerful beings, and Valandil's eyes here did the job perfectly.
I loved the atmosphere in Imladris, the way they all felt what had been going on, how they understand the weight of what has passed yet manage to keep the child bissfully ignorant of the worst parts of it. Undesrtated yet clear, the atmosphere of a very dearly bought victory is clear here, yet still I had to gap in joy and amazement with Valandil at the sight of the two lovers reunited.
You write beautifully, Bejai, please do not leave us here? :-)
Author's reply
Thank you. I had the hardest time figuring out how to do the fall of Sauron without actually writing it. This seemed to work, and I'm glad to hear that it did. Valandil has some interesting parallels that I want to explore in the next chapter or two, and this was a good way to introduce him and set him up while still moving the plot forward.
Glad you enjoyed the lovers reunited. I wanted them to have a nice one for once. Just a decade apart this time :)
I'm certainly not leaving you here. I have a good portion of the next chapter written, and a pretty clear idea of where I want to go with it. My difficulty has been summoning the will to write for fun (I write at work all day), but having gotten back into the swing of it, I'm excited to move forward again.
Thanks so much for your kind words. Lovely to "see" you again.
perelleth
· 1 February 2006
· Chapter 11: The Plains of Dagorlad
Poor Amdir! Everyone's been dragged to a desperate situation none of them was looking for in the very place, but Amdir's lot looks very tragic. A loyal king to his people, to his allies and to "the child of his heart" It was powerful and moving, and so, so sad. It shows very clearly, too, the depth of responsiblity upon Oropher's shoulders in his desperate, impatient, charge, dragging along those who trusted him and who would not let him die alone, and leaving Gil-galad to either follow his father's mistake and drag the rest of his army to the same fate, or bearing the grudge of the silvan survivors for ever, yet saving the rest of his army for a definite assault, even if he knew that he would not survive. The weight of dooms and responsibility perfectly wrapped up in such short chapter. Congratulations.
Of course, I am assuming that Gil-galad is Fingon's son...:-) but it made even more sense here...)
And Celeborn being left behind was a nice loop. Apologies for the delay, you know how RL is...
Author's reply
Thank, perelleth! (And no apologies necessary. I'm delighted to get a review whenever it comes).
Amdir really wrote this chapter. It wasn't what I intended, but when I got thinking about it, the interplay between the roles that Oropher, Amdir, and Celeborn in this war really could have been a driving force between all that happened. I understand Gil-galad's choice, but can't help but wonder how things might have been different.
Yes, my preferred interpretation is that Gil-galad is Fingon's son. Although I hadn't thought about how his decisions might have been affected by that fact until you pointed it out! Just goes to show that these characters have a life of their own, and get very insistent about how they're portrayed!
So glad you enjoyed the chapter. More to come, as soon as I figure out how to wrap up the Last Alliance
Redheredh
· 29 January 2006
· Chapter 11: The Plains of Dagorlad
Man, what a chapter...
Amdir just pulls at the heart strings. He is the tragic character here. How can you not pity him helplessly loving - all his kin, his people, and his world. A peacemaker caught up in war. ...his body sinking as his soul snapped and drifted. Yet, he did not let go until he knew Amroth would live. His end drowned my own heart.
Add to that - Oropher frustrated but forever courageous. Gil-galad absolutely determined despite his doom (or perhaps becaus of it!). Elrond torn though always loyal. Celeborn defeated at seemingly every turn yet still fighting.
I personally enjoyed the opening very much. Celeborn ended up just where I thought he would and with the predictable results. The conversation with Valadil's mother was unexpectatly wonderful. But, Gil-galad carrying out his stratgy at all costs was almost chilling. Calandil coming on and bringing the impetus for the end-game was simply brilliant.
Some might think you have shown Celeborn in too shining a light. But, really they just need to think about what you have explained here a little more and see things from a Sindar viewpoint. Which is a very easy thing for me to do. ;) 'Tis an incredibly credible conjecture of events. imho
And it is in the way your write it down, creating the context, that it becomes possible to feel and better understand these events from Arda's history. What's that expression... it just doesn't get any better than this!
Thank you for continuing this tale!
Author's reply
Thanks, Redheredh. Writing Amdir's end was tough. I really do think he was a balancing force among these elven lords. You have the right of it: a peacemaker who can't escape war.
Glad you approve of Celeborn's role. It helped me explain why he wasn't named as being at Dagorlad. He would have been involved, but this was the only way I could think of to reconcile canon with my perception of his character. I think Gil-galad made the right choice, but I wonder what might have been different if he had been there.
Too shining a light. Heh. Well, he is my hero character ;) All these battles and wars do look different from an Sindar perspective. I'm sure they'd also look different from the Silvan point of view. It's been fun to explore.
So glad you enjoyed the chapter!
Bodkin
· 29 January 2006
· Chapter 11: The Plains of Dagorlad
Oh wow. Very distressing stuff - but handled beautifully. Oropher remains angry right up to the end - and reluctant to accept anyone else's wisdom. Amdir is torn between them all, and ultimately sacrificed by Oropher's charge. Celeborn must, in some ways, have been so frustrated to remain behind - and yet his role is essential (and gets out of him not having been named as present at Dagorlad). Two leaders lost already, Gil-galad fated not to return and, of course, countless other elves and men about to be slaughtered to be rewarded with an incomplete victory.
"The Elves have ended every war we have ever fought in something less than victory,"
And Celeborn would know, wouldn't he, for he has been involved in most of them. Going to war knowing that you cannot succeed must require terrific strength of mind - I do feel sorry for Gil-galad. I hope he gets to be really, really happy when he returns in the Blessed Realm, because he has had as much of a bum deal as Elrond.
Having to wait for the right moment as his allies are cut down. Not good. I'm not surprised the troops were restive. But he needs to wait for Sauron to come out himself or all will be lost.
I'm so pleased to see more of this. But so sad - inevitable, but so, so sad!
Author's reply
Thanks, Bodkin. Much of this chapter is trying to explain why Celeborn wasn't named at Dagorlad--surely he would have been involved! Having him behind the scene explained it for me. And in some way, I think it may also have contributed to Oropher's decisions. Writing Oropher has been nerve-wrecking for me; I do hope I got him right!
Yeah, I agree with you about Gil-galad. In my head, he's reborn somewhere in Valinor, and lives happily ever after, the poor guy!
So glad you enjoyed the chapter!
Nilmandra
· 8 January 2006
· Chapter 10: The Last Alliance
Yeah for Redheredh! Glad she inspired you (hides from whatever you were supposed to be doing).
This was a great look at how the Last Alliance was formed, but what really grabbed me was the opening - how Sauron heard the call, but how he was not 'whole' when he heard it, having 'chained' a large part of himself to a piece of metal in a mountain far away.
Author's reply
Thanks, Nilmandra. That Sauron scene has actually been written for months. It was the only part of this whole chapter that cooperated and wrote itself. The rest was a hideous slog. For some reason, Sauron seems to be a particularly good muse for me. I'm not sure that's entirely a good thing ;) Glad you enjoyed the chapter.
Redheredh
· 8 January 2006
· Chapter 10: The Last Alliance
Oh wow, this was good! Merciful Este, *everything* you write is good!
The opening was fantastic. The whole idea that he forged his own chains in life. ;) But, his hatred allows for no act of repentance, not even cautioning those who would fall prey to the same as he. I love it!
I also love where you pick up events. Heh, we once talked about the fact that powerful people are never completely alone, especially in a less mechanized world. But, who wants all those oc's around? And you used it to your advantage! Sly trick, lady.
The council in Lothlorien was great - the conversation very realistic emotionally yet rational for their dilemma. Oropher is such a wonderful character to have around as a foil for these issues. Amroth practically siding with him caused a sharp pain. I have to say that I adore your Amdir's sweet nature. That Celeborn lent aid to Anarion and Isuldur is very interesting and quite reasonable if he and G were occupying the Dol Amroth at that time. You set this up nicely last chapter with Isildur their visit with him.
Galadriel and Isildur's conversation was wonderful too. What a comparison of two kinds of despair and hope. The affinity between Isildur and Celeborn you had established already was not a surprise, but you pointed out some other less obvious things besides. I liked how Celeborn was very willing to help with the sapling and Isildur ready to ask for it. The White Tree and the royal line of Numeanor runs together as fortold and it was interesting how you kept that parallel going here not only including saving the sapling as part of this story, but its condition and Isildur's emotions. It is a nice reflection of the future when Aragorn must rediscover his royal roots by finding his hidden sapling, healthy in the wild, or deem himself a failure.
Gil-galad's council was most informative about the initial preparations needed to prepare for this war and the forming the Last Alliance. Everyone will have their part to play in it. But, exactly what is the king planning for Celeborn, eh? I have my guess... which I must wait until the next chapter to see if I am right... darn... However, you know already that I am *usually* of the patient sort.
What a wonderful Sunday treat this was to find waiting!
You are so kind not to say that I am a wretched thorn in your side. But, if I just knew what it was I said that got us this chapter to read, I most certainly would say it again. ];}
Author's reply
Thanks, Redheredh. I wasn't anything you said, so much as the last push I needed to remind me that I had some friends out there, maybe waiting for me to finish the chapter. Inspiration is a fickle thing ;)
So delighted you enjoyed the chapter. The scene with Sauron was the only part of this chapter that flowed for me. It wrote itself months ago. I just had to look briefly at his return from his point of view.
I was nervous to write Oropher. I enjoy him a lot, but worried that I'd hit the wrong tone, or that I would get it wrong. It seems to have worked out, though. He'll be back in the next chapter, and I hope I do right by him.
The White Tree thing was another beat I knew this chapter needed, given its place in the LotR mythology, and the way it had already played in the story. I went digging through the books, and when I discovered that the original White Tree that came over from Numenor died in Minas Ithil, it was just too good to pass up.
As for Celeborn's job ... he's not happy about it, I can tell you. But he'll do it.
Thanks for the fantastic review
Bodkin
· 8 January 2006
· Chapter 10: The Last Alliance
Oh yes. This was a good moment. When a new chapter appears of something long awaited and it is as enjoyable as this. A good morning!
Somehow the image of Celeborn all silver and green in his cunningly crafted armour was worth it on its own!
The start, with Sauron returning had a beautifully mythic feel of the inevitable rise of evil. And then a switch to normality - as far as normality can ever exist when Oropher and Celeborn are occupying the same forest. Celeborn is right though - what choice to they have when it comes to confronting something like Sauron, Disciple of Morgoth? Oropher's Silvan elves won't take the 'sail' option - and doing nothing just means they'll be picked off in ones and twos and small groups. Going to war won't avoid death - but might protect the women and children. Goes against the grain though for Oropher to agree.
Celeborn thought it more prudent to lead a force to Gondor's aid before it was too late, than ride the other direction to talk about it. What a sensible elf!
Galadriel does enjoy being prophetic - it's a bad habit. She should try a bit of straight talking sometime! But I do like the idea of the life of the White Sapling being tied up with Isildur's will to live. And that, even as they go to war, the elves know that this is their last chance to rid the world of Sauron.
I was so happy to see this!
Author's reply
Glad you enjoyed Sauron's return. That was the only easy part of this chapter. Gah! Although I must say, I love it when Celeborn shows up in his armor. Just gotta sit back and admire for a minute ;)
I was nervous about writing Oropher. I think he's a great character, but wasn't sure if I'd be able to get his voice. I hope I did right by him. He'll show up in the next chapter--which won't be a very pleasant experience for him--so I thought it was only fair that he get a say in this chapter.
As for Galadrile and prophecy ... LOL, it really is a bad habit. But then you look at Celeborn, and the fact that he nearly came to blows with Oropher because of his habit of being ... somewhat blunt, and you start to understand Galadriel a little better. If no one knows what the hell you're talking about, maybe that isn't so bad after all ;)
Thanks for the great review!
perelleth
· 8 January 2006
· Chapter 10: The Last Alliance
Now, this was a very welcome update, Bejai!
I liked the inmediacy of so many things about to happen, the meaningful conversations and the feeling of doom. Orpoher was great in his rueful understanding of the inevitability of it all, and I can only picture the dismay in both forests when Celeborn departed after such brief and decisive council.
Everybody´s character seemes perfectly pinned down to me, yet I was particularly mopved by this Glaadriel heralding the decay of elves. It was jsut great, you captured perfectly the difference between men and elves in Isildur´s restlessness and gloominess and her calm foresight and rendering of the whole picture, and at the same time capable of concentrating in the here and now.
Author's reply
Thanks, perelleth! It was a welcome update for me too! Such a relief to get this chapter out at last.
Glad you enjoyed Oropher. I was a little afraid of writing him, but it seems to have gone well. Good to hear that it worked!
I'm so glad you enjoyed the beat between Galadriel and Isildur. I think Isildur feels very helpless, but Galadriel helped him put things into perspective. At least his entire race isn't decaying.
Thanks for the review!
Shemyaza
· 8 January 2006
· Chapter 10: The Last Alliance
I have read this story over a period of a couple of years, as you posted each chapter. I understand that real life gets in the way of writing sometimes, because it does with mine, but I for one am delighted always to read another wonderful chapter.
Write when you can, each one is a gem.
Author's reply
Wow, thank you so much! Always good to hear from new people.
Gah, it has been years, hasn't it? I went back and looked at the stats on this story. I posted the first chapter in Feb. 2004. I feel like I've finally turned the corner on this story ... maybe I'm half way done at last! I was only able to write three chapters last year, but I'm very hopeful that I can move forward with better speed in the next.
Thanks so much for the review. I always treasure new comments, especially from readers who have been in the background the whole time. I makes me hope that other people are quietly enjoying it as well.
Redheredh
· 11 July 2005
· Chapter 9: Gondor
Finally a new chapter! Geez, I should talk... its taken me long enough to leave a review... but, you know well about such RL detours.
Just a *few* things that stuck me in this story:
Amroth saying "What divine edit tells you that leadership means abandoning your own needs?" Very revealing that.
Celebrian's determined declaration about time healing all wounds despite what she went though and was going to go through. Very revealing that too.
The man in the mud asking Celeborn about his lost son. Almost eerie.
The stalwart Limnen. I love OCs and he is a good one.
The description of aftermath of the wave. Just blow away by your writing talent, this entire chapter.
Celeborn trying to speak the truth without prejudice, but with leadership.
The coming of Isildur's ships and Isildur's effervescence ;) I like his suspicion that his interrogator might be using Sauron's tricks. And that he recognizes a commander when he hears one. Nice that he ends up in an affectionate truce with the ancient silver lord. A man respecting untamed Nature, but loving it as well. Which don't mean he ain't gonna try getting some'um past him.
Celeborn and a scion of Celeborn! Too cool! And such a chatty little thing! :D
No, it just cannot be that easy for Sauron to be dead. Nope, not at all.
That was some amusing manuvering on Isildur's part. Then, for all his machinations to be proven foolish. Ha!
But, you were the clever one in the end, putting in those last words - "the return of the king".
Loved that!
Bring on Sauron!
Author's reply
I'm just honored that you took the time to review at all, considering RL challenges. Glad you enjoyed this chapter; you actually had a lot to do with it. The end conversation between Isildur and Celeborn was inspired by several conversations we've had. I love the idea that Aragorn, here in another age, is Elu's heir. Leaving Middle-earth in his hands seems wonderfully appropriate to me!
Glad you're enjoying Amroth and Celebrian. I've been trying to telegraph their natures and fates without being too heavy-handed. Not sure I always suceed, but I do try ;)
I'm so glad you commented about the man in the mud! It was meant to be a subtle, eerie breath of foreshadowing.
Isildur was fun to write. In many ways, he was more perceptive than I imagined. But also quite bold in his assertions that he could control evil things and places. That will come back to bite him!
Glad you enjoyed the tree. I thought that any meeting between Celeborn and the White Tree would have been special, and really wanted to write it.
Thanks again for taking the time to review. I sincerely appreciate that you would take the time to think of me.
sherlock21b
· 6 July 2005
· Chapter 9: Gondor
So sorry to hear about your grandfather. Congrats on the law school. My sister's an attorney, so I know all about the "study for the bar and start a job" experience--best of luck!
As for the story: Wow! I was so happy to see another chapter arrive. Very evocative imagery, from the descriptions of the sea to "Celeborn the cat." And the characterization (from hints at Amroth's future foibles to Celeborn's holding court with the White Tree) was spot on.
Can't wait to read the next installment.
Author's reply
Thanks for the review and the kind words, sherlock21b. Love your username, by the way ;)
I'm so glad you enjoyed this chapter. It was a real struggle to get it right -- the chapter fought me tooth and nail for the longest time. But hearing from people, hearing that they enjoyed it, makes it all worthwhile. Thanks for taking the time to tell me so!
And I'll do my best to get the next installment out in a more timly way!
Nilmandra
· 6 July 2005
· Chapter 9: Gondor
Bejai, can I hire you to write the descriptions for my stories? Your use of words to create images are as vivid as any painter's brush. Your description of the unfeeling sea is incredible, and the images of destruction so fitting given the horrors we have seen out of the Indian Ocean. I think my favorite, though, is your description of Celeborn. A big cat, indeed - sleek and beautiful and very dangerous. The view of the elves from the perspective of Isildur was very well done.
You have accomplished an incredible amount, I would say, since you last updated. I am sorry about your grandfather, but I wish you all the best as you take your bar exams, begin a new job and buy a house. Selfishly, we hope you'll still update this tale.
Author's reply
Ah, shucks. *blushes* Thanks, Nilmandra.
Since we did have the terrible example of the tsunami, I felt I needed to do it justice in this story. It was important to get it right, and I hope I did.
Glad you liked the description of Celeborn the "cat." It was a late addition as I was looking for things to flesh out the dialogue. It's an image I've often associated with him, but never had the chance to work into a story before.
Thanks for the review and the kind words. And rest assured, I will continue to update. I have too much fun with this to stop!
daw the minstrel
· 6 July 2005
· Chapter 9: Gondor
As always, this is powerfully and beautifully written.
I was interested in the difference in the way Celeborn feels when we look through elf eyes and human eyes. His elven difference shows up when the men see him in a way it doesn't when the elves are among themselves.
The wave damage brought back memories of the tsunami. I had never made the connection before.
Author's reply
Thank you, daw!
I'm so glad you feel a difference between the elves and the men. That distinction is one I work very hard to make. It is always a struggle for me to keep the elves properly elvish, and I'm so pleased to hear I seem to be succeeding.
It was eerily tragic to get an example like the tsunami just as I was starting on that section of history in my story. Those images certainly played heavily into my description and understanding of the event in Middle-earth. I would rather not have had a real-life example, though.
Thanks for the review!
perelleth
· 6 July 2005
· Chapter 9: Gondor
Yay! so good to read an update from you!!! The long-expected chapter!
I like the second paragraph whole, a stunning imagery and such a creative pov!
Well, I like the whole chapter,actually, but that paragraph truly impressed me. The aftermath of the tsunami, pardon me, the wave was impressing and heart breaking by its simplicity..
"Where is it written that rulers must suffer? What divine edict tells you that leadership means abandoning your own needs?" Ha! great! Maybe in one of those "how to be a good ruler" manuals you better had taken the time to read instead of pursuing Nimrodel, Amroth? That was such a nice touch, a good insight into Amroth's weakeness! I mean, I understand he's concerned by his mum's health, but this particular piece of reasonning would not ever convince Galadriel...
Isildur's trying to claim Sauron's land in retaliation is foolishly appropriate too. I'm awed at how smothly you manage to make uss feel the difference between edain and elves, its is almost overwhelming and tactile! Celeborn's gossip with the tree was amusing, as well as Isildur's wariness of the silver cat... Good, good chapter!
I'm sorry to read about your Grandfather's passing, Bejai.(hugs) ON the other hand, congratulations for your achievements! grad, new job, house and car, that's a full agenda indeed. Only you forgot a little detail, Deific flame chapter 10? :-) Seriously, now, congratultions and good luck!
Author's reply
Thanks for the review, perelleth! It was your comment in the last review, wondering where this chapter was, the finally guilted me into finishing it ;)
Glad you liked that second paragraph. It was one of my favorites, but nearly got cut when I hit on an organizational idea that finally made this chapter work. I was so glad I was able to work it in after all, and gratified that you enjoyed it.
Amroth needed to reappear in this chapter, and I needed to make another reference to his future fate. I can't help but think he might be right in some ways, but very, very wrong in many others. I suspect that he and his father are going to have it out on the subject on of these days. Probably at the worst possible time ;)
Thanks for commenting about the difference between men and elves. One of the most difficult things for me is keeping a distinct line between them, of not letting the elves become to much like us. In my first drafts they always come off as, I don't know, Californian or something. It is a real struggle, and it is good to hear that I'm succeeding.
Thanks for the review and your kind words!
Sphinx
· 6 July 2005
· Chapter 9: Gondor
*blinks*
*blinks very hard*
OMG. You are back. And I havent read LOTR fanfic in months. Literally.
*glomps you*
More coherent review later. I am just savouring the niceness of having a story return. :D
Author's reply
Hey! *ducks the glomp*
Hope you enjoyed it. I honestly didn't think I would get a chance to finish this chapter until September. It had bogged badly, and I didn't think I had the time to work it out. Then suddenly the chapter suggested a solution to all my problems, and demanded its chance to be seen, so I had to finish it!
Bodkin
· 6 July 2005
· Chapter 9: Gondor
From the very beginning, I am left stunned. The whole paragraph from 'Although it had traveled the cycle hundreds of times since. . . to It was the sea, and tears merely added to its depth.' is just so beautiful and evocative and tragic and poetic I want to read it again and again.
And Amroth, finding his parents wearyingly eccentric, makes a wonderful counterpoint.
It is so obvious (when it is pointed out) that the removal of Valinor and her uncertainty about its fate, would increase Galadriel's longing for what she remembers as its security. And that Amroth and Celeborn would want trees.
I enjoyed seeing Amroth and Celebrian play - while their father ignored them! Some things never change! And their recollection of the aftermath of the wave is - chilling. (So many traumatic events are listed or described in no more than a few throw-away lines. To be made to consider what that actually meant to those enduring the fallout is very powerful and puts a whole different perspective on what those who lived through them endured. The wave that drowned Numenor is so much more than nine ships arriving on a pleasant summer sea to set themselves up in authority over lesser men. In fact, without the destruction of the social system that existed before the wave, perhaps the heirs of Numenor wouldn't have found it quite so easy to waltz in and take control.)
And I can just see Celeborn with the confident air of knowing what to do, while inside he was feeling that 'Much is wrong in the world; I can feel it as well as you. When I reach for the earth, it snarls its pain into my blood. The world has changed.'
Yet Isildur (and the rest) were in a state of shock little better than anyone else - dispossessed refugees, with nothing to which to return and no knowledge of what faced them. It is amazing that they built their kingdoms into places of security so rapidly.
And Celeborn got to meet a very special tree. I just love the way he and the White Tree hold long garrulous conversations. So him. Even if he is 'an elf of terrifying depth'. Such terrifying depth that he can see Isildur as the heir of Elu. Which makes Isildur's heir, aka the man of many names, Elu's heir - at the end of another age.
How disconcerting it must have been for Isildur to sit reciting names from the beginning of his line - and discover he was sitting next to an elf to whom Elwing was great niece. And for him to hear Celeborn acknowledge him as direct heir to Elu.
What a terrific chapter. I was so delighted to see it.
At least some of the things in your crazy life have been good ones. Congratulations on your achievements, both past and imminent. Commiserations on your grandfather's passing. And I hope you love the new job. (But not enough to stop you writing!)
Author's reply
Thanks for the great review Bodkin! Glad you liked the paragraph about the sea and the rain. It was one of the first I wrote for the chapter, back when the chapter was much different. When I started to change things I nearly threw it out, but couldn't bear too.
The description of the aftermath was hard to write. I couldn't properly describe the magnitude of the thing, so decided to go with minimalism instead.
I'm so glad you commented on how the destroyed social structure must have made it easier for Isildur et al to establish themselves as kings. I had a scene written in my head where just that type of thing happens, where the men turn toward them, but couldn't get it to fit.
So glad you liked Celeborn and the tree. I think that it's presence, more than anything else, would have softened him toward the men.
Thanks again for the review. And never fear! I shall keep writing. This story has me around the throat too tightly to dare quit ;)
Sophia Silfaery
· 19 April 2005
· Chapter 8: Upheaval
I've read this quite a few times now but I've never been able to find the words to show quite how much I love it. I am just bowled over by the sheer brilliance of your prose. Your grasp of the characters is so clear and you bring them to life for me in a way few can! Just wow and my sheer admiration for your talent.
Author's reply
Thanks! I'm glad to hear from you. Every review is precious. I've certainly been enjoying your stories recently as well, and hope you keep it up!
Nilmandra
· 23 January 2005
· Chapter 8: Upheaval
In light of the recent tsunami's, I fear we can visualize all too well what you wrote about here. How the earth must have changed, and I particularly like Osse's reaction. He must have rejoiced at seeing Gorthaur sink upon his throne, even as Uinen mourned the loss of Numenor. I wonder where Elendil and compnay washed ashore? I sort of guessed at Mithlond, but I suppose some could have been blow further south.
Oh, and I like your brave and resourceful Celebrian. Galadriel is really shaken by her vision, but Celebrian and Celeborn have kept their heads. I wonder if Galadriel's sense or feel or bound to Valinor was broken on this day? Thank you for getting me thinking!
Author's reply
The convergence between RL and story was really very tragic. While I must admit that today's images did inform this story (how could they not!), I would rather not have had so potent an example.
Glad you enjoyed Osse and Celebrian. I've always loved Celebrian, and have wanted to write Osse for a long time, and this chapter seemed a good place to showcase them.
I figure this even must have really hit Galadriel hard. First, seeing such death with her foresight and ability to see things far off. Second, just the general impact of such an event on everyone, and the changed world on the elves in particular. Third, as you say, Valinor being removed from the world. I'm not sure she knows at this point whether or not it still even exists! And fourth, the ring of water, which surely reacted violently to this event.
Oh, as for your question, the Silm tells us where Elendil et al washed ashore. They ended up separated, with Elendil in Mithlond (hence the kingdom of Arnor in the north) and Isildur in Belfalas (hence Gondor in the south.) Here's the quote, which is going to play a big role in the next chapter:
"Nine ships there were: four for Elendil, and for Isildur three, and for Anárion two; and they fled before the black gale … Elendil was cast up by the waves in the land of Lindon … Isildur and Anárion were borne away southwards … into the western sea in the Bay of Belfalas; and they established a realm in those lands that were after called Gondor."
Thanks for the review!
Marnie
· 20 January 2005
· Chapter 8: Upheaval
Only Ilúvatar could change the world, but perhaps someday when Ulmo was occupied, Ossë would attempt to rock it.
Oh I love him! (From a safe distance ;) ) Ossë is fab! On the one hand we've got the events of Christmas to remind us that when he does rock the world it's a very bad thing, but on the other hand you can't help feeling that his sheer exhuberance is something you wouldn't want to see tamed. And also there's a certain feeling that his emotional involvement both good and bad is preferrable to the Valar's 'oh, we won't interfere, we'll just let them all drown,' attitude. Excuse me, but weren't they put here in order to interfere?
I loved the description of what the Breaking of the World must have felt like to those who were as intimately connected to it as the elves - particularly the image of Arda curling round on itself like a wounded animal. And how terrifying to think that Valinor was gone, and not know if it was ever possible now to go there - it's very different to choose to stay somewhere than to be shut in.
I like the way Galadriel feels the tumult of water through Nenya, so it becomes a drawback rather than an asset in this case. Oh, and I loved the very elvish 'the people found a tree clinging to her.'! That kind of detail makes such a difference!
Celeborn's practical nature really comes to the fore in this chapter :) I had to sympathize with Calandil's 'Is that all', but on the other hand that's really what such situations need most of all - someone to take charge and make sure everything is done as quickly and efficiently as possible. And he's the ideal choice for that.
Really enjoyable chapter! You're on a roll now aren't you? To which I can only say 'hurray' :)
Author's reply
Thanks Marnie!
I just had to save the elves of Edhellond. Tolkien never wrote a song about this tragedy, as far as I know, soI figured that their losses must have been relatively low. The Valar had set aside their governance of the world, so I think they would have felt it was improper to interfere with anything Iluvatar was doing. (Not that I'm convinced they would have helped even if they could!) Elvish foresight was too fickle to help, and getting the word up and down the coast would have taken too long. Thus, Osse. Besides, I've wanted to write Osse ever since he started showed up in your stories ;) He has quite an interesting ethic. I love how passionately he does everything, from his love of chaos to his love of the elves, and his willingness to embrace both fully, although the inhabitants of Middle-earth might sometimes see those as contraditionary aims.
Glad you enjoyed the "feel" of the elves' experience. I think even more than the damage they can see, the difference in the structure of the world would have impacted them deeply. More discussion on that coming in the next chapter.
This chapter rolled out much better than some of the previous chapters, and the next one is already coming along. It is easier, now that I'm back in actual Tolkien-written history, and not just muddling around trying to fill massive holes in the timeline. I feel like I've just been mucking through the last four chapters so I can get back to what is interesting. As I originally conceived this story, this chapter was supposed to be the third! I'm pleased with how the other parts finally developed and enhanced the initial idea, but it certainly was a slog!
Thanks again for the review.
perelleth
· 19 January 2005
· Chapter 8: Upheaval
Wow! it's truly impressive after last events, just because images are still fresh on screens but, nonetheless.. i consider you've wholly succeeded in depicting this mosntruous event!!! I'm amazed at how powerful your words are. I mean, as I had never before put thought on what had happened beyond the Misty Mountains, it all comes as a big surprise now to consider all the damage the powerful after wave must have done to both elven harbors... Interesting, I had never considered that.
I love Celebrían being so efficient and the way both Celeborn and Galadriel feel the effects through their different connections. But were I to pick out something special from this chapter, I'd definitely choose Ossë!! wow! I like this rebellious Maia and though he may seem a bit careless.. I kind of understand his emotions at the sight of the unleashed forces of his own realm.... I think it was very effective to show the wave from his neither-human nor-elven point of view. It definitely made it even more unnatural than it already was. Congrats! I'm truly enjoying your work!
Author's reply
Thanks, perelleth! The convergence of real life and story was quite sad while I was writing this, but I'm pleased to hear that it was successful. The balance between tasteful and realistic was a hard one to strike.
I'd never thought about these events from this point of view until I started really digging into the Silm was I was researching the background of this story. Once I realized that the shores of Middle-earth must have suffered the consequences of a massive reworking of the world, I just had to write it.
I'm glad you enjoyed Osse. I've always wanted to write him, and he fit in well here. On the one hand, this is the guy who joined up with Morgoth just because he likes chaos ... on the other, he has a deep attachment to the elves. He certainly has an interesting point of view ;)
I'm glad you're still enjoying, and thanks for the review.
Bodkin
· 18 January 2005
· Chapter 8: Upheaval
Such a dreadful event - it's good to see it explored from the point of view of those who endured its effects. Histories insist on concentrating on idiots like Ar-Pharazon and completely ignore the effect their actions have on people who are just living their lives.
I enjoyed seeing efficient Celebrian in charge of things. She has plenty of practical good sense - and doesn't seem to mind her adar taking over, either. Probably quite a relief in a situation like this.
Poor Galadriel - torn apart on so many levels here - elfy connection to land, sea, Aman - and foresight informing her of the death of all those who dwelt in Numenor. And Celeborn feeling the disruption of the land. They must feel rather like novice sailors reeling on a high sea.
Thank goodness for Osse. At least they got some warning - even if Ulmo didn't seem to feel it necessary to tell them what would happen.
Moving - I'll read it again tomorrow. I hope someone takes this out on Ar-Pharazon in whatever afterlife he is condemned to endure.
Author's reply
Hi Bodkin
Thanks for the review. Once I got thinking about it, I figured that this had to have been one of the massive events of the second age. I didn't really want to write the Ar-Pharazon POV, so this was much more, er, fun.
I decided that the elves just had to have some kind of warning, otherwise it really would have wiped out Edhellond and Mithlond. Since this event wasn't really immortalized in elven song (that we know of!), I figured that the loss of life must have been fairly low. And I've always wanted to write Osse, so it just worked.
I agree about the "novice sailors" bit. Even with foresight, I don't think either of them could have imagined this.
Thanks again for the review!