Inkling
· 1 February 2005
· Chapter 5: Night Visitors
Kids now in bed so back to your story (am already thinking my kids would like this story)…This gave me quite a chuckle: “pulling them as smooth as boys who must make their beds before breakfast are wont to do.” Oh, do I know what that’s like…sometimes I think my boys’ beds look better BEFORE they make them!
You turn a nice phrase, Lin…I especially liked this one: “it was no fur off his feet!”
And “gobble-uns” was very clever as a logical corruption of goblins. Also liked how you worked in the old superstitions about the “little people” souring milk and blighting crops.
I’m really enjoying how the tale is unfolding so far…the Thorn family is delightful, and it’s fun to see so many familiar characters pop up. So “young” Elladan is something of a hothead, eh? How old is he in this story? (I’d go check the Tale of Years, but I’m too lazy). There’s a lot of thought behind this story that shows in the well-observed small details, such as the fact that foxes and owls, though small to us, would indeed be threats to a hobbit child.
Despite the whimsical tone of much of this, it’s really rather grim, isn’t it? But then, so were most of the great old fairy tales…
Author's reply
Ah yes, I remember the shock it was to read the old fairy tales, so much different from the modern sanitized versions. Two of the three little pigs were eaten, as I recall...
I don't remember how old Elladan was, but I do seem to recall that this story is set before Elrond's wife was taken by Orcs in the mountains.
Someone else remarked on reading this aloud to their children. Don't know if they read all the way to the end or not! But it was fun to hear the young ones' impressions.
Thanks!
Inkling
· 31 January 2005
· Chapter 0: Prologue
Lin! I have finally seen my way clear to starting this story, and just had to drop you a quick line to say how excited I am, and how much I love it already! It took less than 12 words for me to know it was my kind of tale…when I got to "Ah, best beloved," you had me! I’ve always been a huge fan of "The Just So Stories" and still have the ancient battered copy that was my mother’s—in which, unfortunately, at some tender age I decided to color half the illustrations with markers. But I digress…this is a wonderful beginning, and I’m already wondering just who this old gaffer is who has such a great store of knowledge, and who is the young ‘un he’s talking to. I’ll bet before this is over you tell us…
Author's reply
Glad you dropped me a quick line! O yes, "best beloved" -- wondered if anyone would pick up on that little tribute to a great storyteller.
If you don't guess who the Gran-dad and young'un are by the end, drop me another line and I'll tell you who I imagined them to be!
And of course, it'll be lovely to hear any comments you might have during the story itself...
Thanks for taking the time to write!
Dana
· 6 January 2005
· Chapter 2: Fear
Ack. How terribly ominous. And poor Pick -- poor Pick's mum, too, and his brothers and his sisters. What an awful thing to have happened to the Leaf family, as well.
And this:
'Aye,' his mother said. 'And there's somewhat wrong with the stream, as well, the water's fouled somehow, black and unwholesome. 'Tis a good thing we get our water from a spring, but your da wonders if that water will go off, next?'
'Is that why the pig drinks the first bucketful every morning?' Black asked in astonishment.
His mother nodded slowly. 'If the water goes off, he'd rather lose a pig than a hobbit.'
Made my heart hurt, it did.
Dana
· 6 January 2005
· Chapter 1: Shadow
'But I want to go,' Pickthorn wailed.
Hawthorn bent to talk to his little brother face-to-face. 'You stay around here, Pick,' he said. 'Don't go wandering off. Wouldn't want the gobble-uns to get you!'
'Gobble, gobble!' Applethorn crept up behind the littlest brother, his fingers wiggling and clutching like claws.
'Mum!' Pickthorn shrieked, even as Hawthorn swept him up from the floor into the safety of his arms.
'Don't tease him so,' he said sharply. 'It's not funny.'
How very, very adorable. The lads are all charming, in their own lad-like way -- and Pick is precious and adorable and I want to scoop him up and cuddle him. And the ending - the poor dear lad. What a shock that would have been.
Love how cheery they are, though, as they're talking about eating him up. Added something, it did. *grin*
Dana
· 6 January 2005
· Chapter 0: Prologue
No, yer Gran-da’s never seen mountains, and never will, I warrant. Green Hills are enough for this old gaffer. Anyhow, we’re getting off the trail.
That? Sounds so incredibly hobbity. I adore it, you know. And the way you tell your stories, too - I know I've seen this before, but it's refreshing, the style in which you're telling this prologue.
Author's reply
Ah, Dana, it's always heartening to hear from you!
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 31: Epilogue
My goodness, this has been a lovely and ambitious story! I don't know that I'd ever have the nerve to tackle the origins of the hobbits and the Shire, but I am so glad that you did!
And I loved your little epilogue. I would guess the Watcher to be either Elladan or Elrohir, as they seemed to be on such fond and familiar terms with Pick. So, Bilbo took after that particular Tookish ancestor, eh? Clever!
Author's reply
My goodness, I didn't answer any of your reviews on this story? Bad me!
Was glad to get the feedback even though I've been remiss in answering. Thanks so much.
(and yes, Bilbo, and I think Pippin, take after Pick the most)
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 28: Before the Face of the King
*VERY* interesting! Glorfindel uncloaked his glory, and drove out the Shadow, but it was only temporary...hmmm...
Author's reply
I would love for Glorfindel to have driven out the Shadow completely and forever, but JRRT said that Rhudaur was overshadowed by evil, and so canon must overrule fancy.
Thanks!
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 27: Ride to Rhudaur
Oh my, I was right, Gorfindel's *really* mad! Ohboyohboyohboy!!
Author's reply
Hoo boy. It's not wise to raise the ire of someone like Glorfindel! (As the Nazgûl found out later...)
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 26: Of Life and Death
Oooh, nasty king. I wouldn't want Glorfindel and the Thorn mad at ME! (Rubs hands in anticipation) On to the next chapter!!
Author's reply
Glorfindel is scary when he's riled up, for sure.
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 25: First Foot
Awwww!!!
Author's reply
(((hugs))) Thanks, dear friend.
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 24: The Ravelled Sleeve
What a nice explanation of the hobbit's observance of Yule! And I'm so glad they are healing and finding joy in the Last Homely House!
Author's reply
I'm glad you liked it! Yule is certainly a time when Light and Darkness take on a special focus and meaning.
Wouldn't it be lovely to be able to visit the Last Homely House sometime? (I might never leave, though.)
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 22: The Rescue
YES!!
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 20: A Stitch in Time
"It's about time." I agree with Beech! Poor little hobbits! And now at last Pick can be reunited with his family.
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 18: On Eagle's Wings
My goodness, you are ambitious! Now we have Gandalf again, with Radagast; I *knew* the Eagle wouldn't eat him if he talked!
Author's reply
You're very wise. (((hugs)))
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 17: The Song
Oh how lovely! I'm so glad Thorn got to see his descendants!
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 16: The Hunted
Oh my, I'm sorry to see that we will lose Thorn, but very glad to see that Pick is all right! Eagles? Ancestors of Gwaihir? Of course they won't eat him once they realize he is a person, and not just an animal--I hope!
Author's reply
Oh yes, these are the ancestors of the eagles who rescued Gandalf and Thorin and the Dwarves and the Burglar! (Their speech patterns are based on how the eagles in The Hobbit spoke.)
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 14: Ascent
Oh dear! I hope poor Pick is not lost for good!
This chapter is marvelous. I love all the little details, describing the changing countryside, and the differences between the lands they find themselves in and the one they left. I could just see that little mountainside clearing with the wild herbs and the strawberried.
Author's reply
I'm so glad! I scrutinized JRRT's descriptions in The Hobbit and LOTR for a long time before I built up enough confidence to write this chapter...
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 11: Hobbit Help
Whoosh! After that build-up, I was afraid that Thorn wasn't going to make it back!
Author's reply
It was a dangerous mission, to be sure!
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 10: A-journey Again
Oh, this is great! Your Elves are lovely, and have just as much personality as your hobbits! Very nice!
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 8: Winter's Rest
Well, we know, of course, that they don't stay there. They should have listened to Thorn.
Author's reply
They should have... but, as they say, hind-sight is 20/20.
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 7: A-Journey
Ah, what a lovely first meeting between Gandalf and the hobbits! "Grand-alf"? Ingenious!
Author's reply
Thanks! It was fun to put the pieces together. :)
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 5: Night Visitors
Oh, dear! How sad! But of course necessary to get them moving, I suppose.
Author's reply
It's so easy to get settled in our ways and think nothing will ever change, isn't it?
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 4: The Fair Folk
Oh goody! Goody! Elves, and such *wonderful* Elves--Elrond's brood and Glorfindel! Should be interesting when little Pick's family find them. (Do I detect a hint of something Pippish about Pick's personality?)
Author's reply
LOL, found this "old" review while answering a new one in this chapter.
There might well be something Pippish about Pick's personality, or even Bilboish, I'd think.
Thanks!
Dreamflower
· 1 October 2004
· Chapter 3: Make New Friends
Thought I'd give this one a try! Lovely! And so we have the ancestors of our Tooks first meeting Gandalf. You must have done a *ton* of research for this one!
Author's reply
Yup. A *ton*.
Chris
· 13 July 2004
· Chapter 99999: Geographical Notes (revised 1/5/04)
I thoroughly enjoyed this story. Nicely done. Thanks for writing it.
Author's reply
Thank you for taking the time to review! You're welcome.