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Moments in Time  by Larner 11 Review(s)
KyMahaleiReviewed Chapter: 34 on 8/19/2009
I just had to comment on this piece. It is so well crafted, insightful and bittersweet. Hobbits don't usually lend themselves to a great deal of introspection. This poem does that very nicely with a simple poetic format and plain but meaningful language.

Author Reply: Thank you, KyMahalei. Dreamflower introduced me to the "dribble" form of poetry, adding or reducing a word per line; it has its own form of elegance to it, as you've noted, that I've often felt was most appropriate for writing about Hobbits.

I suspect that Frodo was a good deal more introspective than other Hobbits even before the quest; afterward I suspect he was far too much so.

It would appear that last night the MEFAs made each of us aware of the other's work--and I truly love the story of yours I read--it is wonderful!

LindeleaReviewed Chapter: 34 on 8/8/2007
Powerful, and though laced with pain and despair a small spark of hope shines through (if only from the reader's perspective; he might not have had hope of healing, so worn was he, and yet we hold that hope for him).

Author Reply: Yes, there's the spark of hope allowing him to make that final decision and journey, looking forward to knowing the ability to know and appreciate life once more.

Thanks again, Lindelea.

InklingReviewed Chapter: 34 on 8/6/2007
This provides an interesting counterpoint to the last poem...Frodo is a lot less sure about this sailing thing than everyone else seems to be! His fears and uncertainty are very believable. I like this stanza best:

Must

I live

and find release

in a strange land

not intended for mere mortals?




Author Reply: The others may realize this is the best for their beloved friend and cousin; but it's Frodo who must give over all he's ever known about himself to actually take the ship. He's the one who goes through the transition from the familiar world to one not specifically designed for mere mortals, who is leaving behind him all that has ever defined him as an individual and his oldest and most intimate relationships.

The coming of Sam at the end and the ability to once again be able to see himself as a Hobbit of the Shire must have been quite a relief for him, I'd think.

So glad you found yourself reading these as well as the latest story.

Linda HoylandReviewed Chapter: 34 on 6/28/2007
A very moving glimpse of Frodo's pain.

Author Reply: Thank you so much, Linda. To know I've touched folks emotions make it all worthwhile.

KittyReviewed Chapter: 34 on 6/27/2007
Once again I am impressed. You caught Frodo’s thoughts rather well, and then managed to do so even in this triangle form. *bows*

Author Reply: Thank you, Kitty. This is Dreamflower's "dribble" format, sort of. I find it's rather interesting to play with, actually, and am honored you're impressed. *Bows in return.*

AntaneReviewed Chapter: 34 on 6/26/2007
Here you are doing two wonderful things in a row and you said poetry came hard for you! Such dreams he had and then had to watch them all turn to dust...but for the ones of seeing his Sam and later I'm sure he did see Aragorn again and his brother-cousins. God gave him a reward in proportion to his sacrifices and endurance.

Namarie, God bless, Antane :)

Author Reply: But this one is just counting words! It's not having to watch for rhythm, rhyming and scanning as the last one was. That one was a real BEAR to write! This was very easy by comparison.

And I'm certain that the reunions and joy of the Presence was more than enough reward for all, particularly after having been given the time on Tol Eressea for healing beforehand.

Hanyatel, Antane.

Grey WondererReviewed Chapter: 34 on 6/25/2007
This is sad and hopeful and beautiful all at once. I really enjoyed it. Thank you.

Author Reply: Yes, although I truly love Armariel's hymn she has written for Frodo renewed to sing. It's in her collection of poems, the Voices collection. But then I love so much of her poetry, both blank verse and rhyming.

And thank you so much for the feedback.

ArmarielReviewed Chapter: 34 on 6/25/2007

Teach me to sing in joy again.

He WILL...his fairy godmother(s) saw to it;)! Interesting format. Glad to see you still playing around with poetry and poetic forms. It's a special calling, fitting words together so that they sing....

~~~{~@

Author Reply: But will the Sea Witch take away that gift of song? Heh!

Yes, another poem hit, using Dreamflower's "dribble" format.

And I'm honored you find the words sing here. Thank you!

Queen GaladrielReviewed Chapter: 34 on 6/25/2007
Oh, this is a lovely companion to "Don't Linger," and this style of poetry is so cool! I don't think I've ever seen it before.

Sam,

my brother,

do not linger

long past your Rosie.

Let me die at least

once more a proper Shire Hobbit.

Oh,

sweet Creator,

grant me ease,

I beg of you.

Release me from my burden.

Relieve me of pain and loss.

Teach me to sing in joy again.

This is my favorite part. A poignant wish and prayer. It's so sad to see all these thoughts of "once" followed by "Then the Ring..." Such a seemingly small thing, yet it undid them all.
God bless,
Galadriel

Author Reply: This format that Dreamflower introduced lends itself to Frodo, as I find him, at least. And indeed the Ring destroyed so much of Frodo's hope for a life as a simple Hobbit of the Shire.

Thanks for the feedback.

harrowcatReviewed Chapter: 34 on 6/25/2007
Oh Larner this is just beautiful. You have a real gift with words; both in longer prose and in the spare minimum of this form of poetry.

Author Reply: You're up? Am do glad you were able to read this before you went to your own rest.

And I thank you. I find this "dribble" poetry to be an interesting form to play with, and a good deal easier than to work with scan, rhythm, and rhyme. And I did use a form of it in Frodo's farewell to Aragorn when he and Sam finally accepted the Gift, after all; it just seemed in keeping to use it here, too.

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