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Vairë Was a Weaver, or, Real Men Wear Corsets  by Celeritas

“Meriadoc, do you know anything about powders and creams?” said Éowyn.

“No; nobody uses this stuff in the Shire.  Why?”

“Because I want you to be aware that the level of powder that you have put on your face makes you look rather…”

“Rather…”

“You look like women of ill repute.”

“My repute is very respectable, thank you very much!” said Pippin.

“I am only judging your appearance.”

“Well, we didn’t have much light, either,” said Merry.

Arwen simply shook her head, possibly reflecting upon mortals and their vanity.  “Some of it will have to go.  I doubt you wish to sully the name of the women where you live.”

“But…” said Pippin.

Éowyn gestured to a looking-glass.

“I suppose you have a point.  Can either of you do a better job?”

“I have no experience in the matter; women of the Riddermark do not like to present false fronts.  And I doubt Arwen ever needed any.”

Arwen nodded.  “We will have to try with what we have.  I assume that neither of you wishes to forgo that part of your appearance altogether?”

The hobbits shook their heads, and so while they discussed what needed to be done the ladies fixed their appearance until they looked decidedly feminine, yet not poorly so.  At sunrise the men entered the room, and Merry and Pippin were dispatched to get the servants to prepare the baths.





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