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Dear Diary  by Lily Dragonquill

24. Forelithe 1368


The light of the stars glimmers in the dark waters of the Brandywine. I love to sit here, though I have seldom done so of late. I have been too excited the past weeks, taking long walks to Bucklebury and Brandy Hall only to show off my belly. People are recognising it - indeed, they would be blind if they did not - and keep giving me advice and asking questions about when I am to give birth. Some even wanted to know if I would come back to Brandy Hall once the little one is born. I never will, though I love my former home very much. My place is here now, near Bucklebury, with Drogo and our child. I am sure my little one will be happy to have a bit of peace and quiet, without hundreds of gaping relatives, and so will I.

I am frightened of what lies still ahead of me. So many things need to be arranged. Goodness, I haven't even thought of a name yet. Drogo keeps telling me that we still have time enough to get everything finished before our baby arrives, but at times he is as restless as I am, though he tries to conceal it.

I suppose he was restless today, or he would not have sent me away. He and my brother Saradas are busy cleaning out the spare room that should become our child's room once the baby is old enough. I guess they did not want me to meddle or to be in their way or to disagree with their plans, so Drogo packed me something to eat - a package that would have fed two full-grown hobbits, but most of the biscuits, plums, grapes and sandwiches I have already eaten - and told me to go and relax somewhere.

And so that was why I came here, to the banks of the Brandywine, to listen to the quiet gurgling of the water and the wind rustling in the leaves of the trees. I arrived some time before dinner and now it is already dark. The first stars have appeared in the sky and I am still sitting on that huge rock jutting out from the shallow water and bathing my feet in the fresh stream as I have often done. The air is still warm, heated by the sunlight stored in the rocks and stones of the bank, and smells of lilac that has almost withered. Closing my eyes I draw in a deep breath and realise that there are other smells in the air as well: earth, wood and marigolds.

"Your father was right, my little one, I needed a little time to relax. Sometimes I think he knows better what I need than I do. He is very caring and, though he can be quite stubborn at times, I love him so much that I sometimes fear my heart would burst." I smile when I think about Drogo and his stubborn nature and for a moment I see a glimpse of a very young face looking at me just as determinedly as he does - a picture that leaves me giggling and shaking my head. "Don't you dare become as stubborn as your father, my dear little Baggins. You don't need to honour the name in that way."

"You heard that, didn't you? You always know when I speak of you and delight in letting me feel it." With a smile on my face I place my hand just underneath my bellybutton. I can feel my child moving within me - a sensation that still sends thrills of joy through my body. "I feel you struggle," I whisper and move my hand gently across my belly in hopes my little one will feel it. How much I wish I could hold my child and look upon my baby.

I lean back, supporting my body with my left arm. Far above my head a bright star glimmers - the evening star. Its light warms my heart and for a moment I close my eyes. The wind's gentle fingers brush through my hair and my mind drifts away. I think of Bilbo. He once told me about Elbereth. He said she was the one who made the stars that should be a light for the Elves when the world was still dark and even now that the darkness is long gone, she is watching over them. "Is Elbereth guarding you as well, my little one? Whether she is or not, I will teach you to honour the stars and look up to them just like my parents once taught me."

As if my words have brought back memories of a time long forgotten I begin to croon a lullaby my mother used to sing.


Twinkle, twinkle, little star,
How I wonder what you are.
Up above the world so high,
Like a diamond in the sky.
Twinkle, twinkle, little star,
How I wonder what you are!


A smile crosses my lips as I feel my baby calm. Singing works wonders. I only hope it will remain thus after my dearest is born. Gilda says it should, and it comforts me to know that my singing voice might help to ease any worry or discomfort that might trouble my little child.

I am just about to intone the second verse when I hear a silent splashing behind me. Turning my head I observe Drogo standing in the water, smiling back at me. He puts his arms around me and kisses the back of my neck, sending shivers down my spine. "I love to hear you sing", he whispers into my ear, tickling the soft flesh of my neck.

I smile and lean back, laying my head on my husband's breast. "You should not distract me then." Feeling a movement within me, I take one of Drogo's hands to place it on my belly. Just at that moment, our baby decides to comment on my falling silent.

Drogo chuckles. "It seems I am not the only one who is in love with your singing."

"No, you're not." The smile on my face broadens as Drogo sits down behind me and I lean into his embrace. "Has to be a weakness of Bagginses."

He smiles and caresses my cheek with the hand that does not rest on my belly. There is nothing but the two of us, the sound of gurgling water and rustling leaves and the evening star above our heads. Nothing, except for the child in my womb who is eager to let me know that my husband and I are not alone and never again will be - a sacrifice I am more than willing to make.

I close my eyes and begin to hum, but quickly fall into crooning again


Twinkle, twinkle, little star,
How I wonder what you are.
Up above the world so high,
Like a diamond in the sky.
Twinkle, twinkle, little star,
How I wonder what you are!





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